Joy & Austin 31: Adding Evelyn Mae

[viii]

Me and my two sisters all have middle names that would be considered "filler" names - Lynn, Rose, and Marie. Lynn is the only one that was chosen because she liked how it flowed, both Rose and Marie have meaning. 

Part of my mother's legal first name is Mae. It was a family name so my grandma continued the trend, and my sister used it as a middle name for my niece. I personally love it. My middle name is Marie and while I do appreciate the sentiment behind my name, I do wish my middle name was Mae instead of Marie. 

You can dislike a name and not be sold on it, but to make such a negative blanket statement on a message board filled with a variety of people is a good way to get disliked. 

[HeartsAFundie]

Evelyn is a cool name.  A friend of my son's was raised by his grandmother who was named Evelyn.  She was/is a hoot!  Always made me laugh.  Great lady.  

I don't see what's wrong with Mae as a middle name.  I think it's pretty and it seems to be enjoying a resurgence.  I went to school with a Lisa Mae (born in the 60s) and a former co-worker named her daughter Jillian Mae (born in the 90s).   And I worked with a woman named Amelia and her nickname was Mae.    And of course, who can forget Alyssa Webster's daughter Lexi Mae? 

 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

12 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

Evelyn is such a gorgeous name. I actually guessed it unofficially, wrote down on my laptop in my Duggar documents, but chose Adalyn, Emersyn and Emery as my official guesses, because Michelle has a lesbian sister called Evelyn, and I didn't think they'd want to name their child after her. So I went with something very close to it. Can't believe I was right, at least unofficially!

The middle name is, as everything the Duggars do, half assed. It's basically "oh yeah, I guess social convection dictates that she needs a middle name, so let's just add Mae, I don't even know". It's not even a name! It's a sound! (And a boring, I don't care about anything one at that) it's a filler middle name, that shows you've put zero effort into giving your child a middle name. There are thousand middle names that would have been better, and they chose... Mae. 

Wow, there are a lot of women named Mae that are going to tell you to shove this nasty up your back side?  It is a real name, Mae West most famously, Mae Whitman most recently (that I know of) Mae Capone, Al Capone's wife.  Just say you didn't like the name you don't have to be a bitch about it. 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

Mae Jemison!!!!

[SweetLaurel]

12 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

he middle name is, as everything the Duggars do, half assed. It's basically "oh yeah, I guess social convection dictates that she needs a middle name, so let's just add Mae, I don't even know". It's not even a name! It's a sound! (And a boring, I don't care about anything one at that) it's a filler middle name, that shows you've put zero effort into giving your child a middle name. There are thousand middle names that would have been better, and they chose... Mae. 

What about Ann or Kay?   I know many people with Ann/Kay as a middle name? Is that a sound or filler?   I kinda love Mae - all old fashioned and different.  I feel bad for baby girl unless they change their views on life because she has no options, but her cute middle name?  Not a biggie.  

[Alisamer]

2 hours ago, viii said:

Me and my two sisters all have middle names that would be considered "filler" names - Lynn, Rose, and Marie. Lynn is the only one that was chosen because she liked how it flowed, both Rose and Marie have meaning. 

Part of my mother's legal first name is Mae. It was a family name so my grandma continued the trend, and my sister used it as a middle name for my niece. I personally love it. My middle name is Marie and while I do appreciate the sentiment behind my name, I do wish my middle name was Mae instead of Marie. 

You can dislike a name and not be sold on it, but to make such a negative blanket statement on a message board filled with a variety of people is a good way to get disliked. 

My sisters and I have middle names Lynn, Anne and Marie. We do often joke that they are "default" middle names, and our parents chose them because they sounded nice with the first names they chose. My mom and one of her sisters also have what could be considered "filler" middle names: Faye and Gail. I don't have strong feelings on them one way or another.

I love, love, love the name Evelyn. And the nickname Evie. Partly because it reminds me of Rachel Weiss in The Mummy, but also because they are beautiful. And I'm fine with Mae. It's not my style, and I'd have spelled it May probably, but it's nice!

It seems a little odd, but so far Joy seems to be the Duggar with names that are similar to my taste. I love the name Gideon (used it for a character of mine! He's a demon, though...) and Evelyn has been high on my list forever for if I had kids. 

I may have to participate in the name guessing next time they have a baby. 

[Nutella Ace]

Joy just posted the pre-birth/going to the hospital vlog on their Youtube channel...

[SorenaJ]

9 minutes ago, SweetLaurel said:

What about Ann or Kay? 

Kay does sound a bit like a sound tbh, Ann doesn’t. 

It’s so strange seeing a middle name that looks like about 0.5 seconds of thought went into it. 

I’m a writer, I can spend days or weeks selecting the perfect name for my characters, looking at meaning, background, ancestry, personality etc, so honestly yes, a filler middle name like Mae does seem very “what the heck, why not?” 

Evelyn is gorgeous though. 

[VBOY9977]

Joy posted a vlog about the days around her due date. I’ll try to summarize:

She tried to get labor started by walking but it didn’t do anything. The day after her due date they went to the doctor and her amniotic fluid was too low and it worried her doctor. From what I recalled he said that this could cause her to have an emergency c - section if the baby’s heart rate dropped too low. 

Since Joy and her doctor both wanted her to have a vbac, they decided to induce with a method that takes into account her previous c - section (breaking waters or low dose pitocin)

They also had Austin’s sister Rachael as a doula and hung lights in the hospital room. She said she planned on getting an epidural later on. 
 

That’s it for this video but I hope they’ll post more soon. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

@VBOY9977 I was just coming to do this She said  her placenta was retiring, (her word not mine) I don't know what the technical term for this is, but I do know this happens to all placentas eventually, it just happens sooner in some than others. This is also even more proof that moms to be NEED prenatal care, think of what could have gone wrong if she were trying to do this on her own like she did with Gideon. 

You could tell she was scared/nervous about the pending delivery before they got to the hospital, I'm sure she was worrying about something going wrong with Evy's delivery and not being able to bring her home. The trauma from Annabelle had to have been very raw for her. She seemed much more relaxed once she was hooked up to the monitors, and things were starting to move along. 

[neurogirl]

@SorenaJ My maternal grandfather's beloved sister has Rae in her name. My mother's middle name is Rae, and her sister also has a version of Rae in her name. My middle name was almost Rae. If I had a daughter, I was absolutely going to use Rae as her middle name, especially since I want to honor my mother but her first name sounds really awkward as a middle name.

Then Carlin named her baby Layla Rae and multiple people expressed the same opinion you did as a "basic, filler" middle name. And it actually made me question using Rae since I have been thinking about children's names for eleventy years and I don't want people to think I didn't put effort in. 

But Rae is actually very meaningful for my family. 

(of course, all the girls' names my husband and I agree on are __ra names - think Terra, Lara...which might be a mouthful with Rae, even as "basic" as it is!)

[constantgardener]

Of course, Evelyn can also be a male name, although probably not so much now. Evelyn Waugh, one of my all time favourite authors, was both male and Catholic (although Evelyn was his middle name, his actual first name was Arthur).

[SorenaJ]

8 minutes ago, neurogirl said:

@SorenaJ My maternal grandfather's beloved sister has Rae in her name. My mother's middle name is Rae, and her sister also has a version of Rae in her name. My middle name was almost Rae. If I had a daughter, I was absolutely going to use Rae as her middle name, especially since I want to honor my mother but her first name sounds really awkward as a middle name.

Then Carlin named her baby Layla Rae and multiple people expressed the same opinion you did as a "basic, filler" middle name. And it actually made me question using Rae since I have been thinking about children's names for eleventy years and I don't want people to think I didn't put effort in. 

But Rae is actually very meaningful for my family. 

(of course, all the girls' names my husband and I agree on are __ra names - think Terra, Lara...which might be a mouthful with Rae, even as "basic" as it is!)

If it’s any consolation, I would never comment on people’s name choices to their face, so hopefully most people are the same way. I would think so. 
 

You could always say: “This is my daughter Amara* Rae, the middle name Rae is in honour of my mother” if you want to feel more comfortable in using Rae, and not wonder if people will think it’s a filler. 
 

*a name that ends in -ra

[front hugs > duggs]

14 minutes ago, neurogirl said:

Then Carlin named her baby Layla Rae and multiple people expressed the same opinion you did as a "basic, filler" middle name. And it actually made me question using Rae since I have been thinking about children's names for eleventy years and I don't want people to think I didn't put effort in. 

But Rae is actually very meaningful for my family.

Whether you have a girl and use 'Rae' or not, I hope when that moment comes you can do what you feel is in your heart and right for you+husband+baby and not question irrelevant opinions. (And I mean this from a place of love, not like, telling you what to do or how to feel lol) ❤️ 

[VineHeart137]

28 minutes ago, neurogirl said:

@SorenaJ My maternal grandfather's beloved sister has Rae in her name. My mother's middle name is Rae, and her sister also has a version of Rae in her name. My middle name was almost Rae. If I had a daughter, I was absolutely going to use Rae as her middle name, especially since I want to honor my mother but her first name sounds really awkward as a middle name.

Then Carlin named her baby Layla Rae and multiple people expressed the same opinion you did as a "basic, filler" middle name. And it actually made me question using Rae since I have been thinking about children's names for eleventy years and I don't want people to think I didn't put effort in. 

But Rae is actually very meaningful for my family. 

(of course, all the girls' names my husband and I agree on are __ra names - think Terra, Lara...which might be a mouthful with Rae, even as "basic" as it is!)

I figure people think the same of my daughters' middle names (As a matter of fact, multiple people on here have used both my girls' middle names as examples of "filler" names ? ) but the sentiment outweighs other people's opinions. And I think their full names are so beautiful and suit them so well that it honestly doesn't matter. Every time I have to pull out their birth certificates for something I always have to stop and admire how good their names look on the paper LOL. If it's meaningful, I say use it, because you're more likely to regret it if you don't. Just my 2 cents!

Edited August 28, 2020 by VineHeart137

[HereticHick]

1 hour ago, SorenaJ said:

Kay does sound a bit like a sound tbh, Ann doesn’t. 

It’s so strange seeing a middle name that looks like about 0.5 seconds of thought went into it. 

I’m a writer, I can spend days or weeks selecting the perfect name for my characters, looking at meaning, background, ancestry, personality etc, so honestly yes, a filler middle name like Mae does seem very “what the heck, why not?” 

Evelyn is gorgeous though. 

Correct me if I'm wrong, you seem a have a general feeling that monosyllabic names aren't "Real"  or "meaningful"

I have a lot of Asian-American friends and relatives who would like a word with you.

[SorenaJ]

6 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Correct me if I'm wrong, you seem a have a general feeling that monosyllabic names aren't "Real"  or "meaningful"

I have a lot of Asian-American friends and relatives who would like a word with you.

Kinda wrong? A lot of monosyllabic middle names tend to be so very incredibly common that they to me at first glance seem to have no real meaning behind them. Sometimes they will have, sometimes they won’t. 

But there are also monosyllabic middle names which are rare, and hence at first glance seem to have more meaning behind them. 

By no means a dig at Asian naming practices in particular. 

[mpheels]

1 hour ago, SorenaJ said:

Kay does sound a bit like a sound tbh, Ann doesn’t. 

It’s so strange seeing a middle name that looks like about 0.5 seconds of thought went into it. 

I’m a writer, I can spend days or weeks selecting the perfect name for my characters, looking at meaning, background, ancestry, personality etc, so honestly yes, a filler middle name like Mae does seem very “what the heck, why not?” 

Evelyn is gorgeous though. 

It’s just really astounding that you pride yourself in putting so much thought into names of fictional characters, then assume Joy (and millions of others) are just randomly picking names out of laziness. Your only basis for this is not liking the sound or asthetic of a name? You have no idea how Joy or anyone else chooses one of these names you have arbitrarily deemed to be “filler”. Intentional or not, your “rules” carry a lot of classist, racist, and xenophobic undertones. And it doesn’t really matter if you deliberately say this to someone’s face or not - you’re posting on a message board open to the world. You have no way of knowing how many people with “filler” of “fake” middle names are reading your comments.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

Seriously how hard is it to just say you don't like the name? No one cares why.  Now according to this poster, any name that is 3 letters long is filler and pointless. So, that means my name is filler and pointless. Thanks, as if I don't have enough issues, I'll now worry if people don't dismiss me because of my short name. OR should I maybe, at 50 years old, start going by my full name. Anyone know how I suddenly start answering to Pamela instead of Pam w/o my PTSD acting up from being punished as a child for being rotten.  I have ADHD so in the 70's & 80's I was a rotten little brat, and back then ADHD wasn't a thing we were just bad kids.

I won't say what I REALLY think of you, it might, hell it will totally get me sent to the prayer closet. Just stop talking there is nothing you can say to justify such a rude and pointless opinion on names. 

[SorenaJ]

9 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Now according to this poster, any name that is 3 letters long is filler and pointless. 

You are putting words in my mouth. 

[Alisamer]

1 hour ago, SorenaJ said:

Kay does sound a bit like a sound tbh, Ann doesn’t. 

It’s so strange seeing a middle name that looks like about 0.5 seconds of thought went into it. 

I’m a writer, I can spend days or weeks selecting the perfect name for my characters, looking at meaning, background, ancestry, personality etc, so honestly yes, a filler middle name like Mae does seem very “what the heck, why not?” 

I tend to assume people put plenty of thought into their children's names, whether it sounds like they did or not. Even if the end result is something I personally cringe at. My college roommate's mother's middle name was just a single letter - but there was a reason behind it! (TBH I thought it was kind of a dumb reason, as did my roommate and her mother. But there was at least some thought there!)

I don't know what relevance Mae might have to Joy and Austin, or if it just seemed to fit the baby once she'd arrived, but I assume they didn't just throw it in there because they had to.

I'm not a published writer, but I do usually take lots of time and do research to come up with my character's names. But sometimes a name just sticks out of nowhere and that's it. It happens.

[llg1234]

57 minutes ago, SorenaJ said:

If it’s any consolation, I would never comment on people’s name choices to their face, so hopefully most people are the same way. I would think so. 
 

You could always say: “This is my daughter Amara* Rae, the middle name Rae is in honour of my mother” if you want to feel more comfortable in using Rae, and not wonder if people will think it’s a filler. 
 

*a name that ends in -ra

....or maybe people should stop worrying about other people's name choices, as long as the name isn't vulgar or offensive. The  reason the person you replied to is worried about others looking down her name choice is because you put down the name in the first place. What a weird thing to get judgmental about.

[fundieundies]

37 minutes ago, SorenaJ said:

Kinda wrong? A lot of monosyllabic middle names tend to be so very incredibly common that they to me at first glance seem to have no real meaning behind them. Sometimes they will have, sometimes they won’t. 

But there are also monosyllabic middle names which are rare, and hence at first glance seem to have more meaning behind them. 

By no means a dig at Asian naming practices in particular. 

Not everyone has to have some grand four syllable name with rich meaning that dates back to the Mayflower or whatever. You can do that for your characters and still let people walk around with 'common', 'meaningless' names like Amy, Mae, Ann, Bo, Lynn or Li . Being proud of your fancy names for pretend people is fine and all, but it's probably not wise to do it on a forum which may well be populated with people named Mae or Amy. We get it, you dig fancy names.

 

Anyway, good for Joy that she likely got her VBAC, did so safely and named her kid something really nice.

[JanasTattooParlor]

I personally can’t stand my own full legal name, but I understand the meaning behind it and therefore respect the choice my parents made with it. My first name is after my mom’s foster mom and my middle is religious-ish and my mom loved it. I go by a traditional nickname for my first name that has many variations of spelling and correct anyone who calls me by my full name. I don’t see why people get so openly judgy about names. What is accomplished by saying that you hate the name or think it’s meaningless other than just you being rude and hurting others feelings? What makes a person think so highly of themself that they can think they know the mind of the person who chose the name and declare that it’s a meaningless choice? Parents agonize over names for kids all the time and still come up with common names like Sarah or John, but that doesn’t make them careless with the name. I have a long three syllable “classic” name and hate it, but I recognize the meaning and that it flows with my last name much better than my nickname would’ve. 

[Twirling Dervish]

39 minutes ago, front hugs > duggs said:

Whether you have a girl and use 'Rae' or not, I hope when that moment comes you can do what you feel is in your heart and right for you+husband+baby and not question irrelevant opinions. (And I mean this from a place of love, not like, telling you what to do or how to feel lol) ❤️ 

My first name is the Welsh spelling of "Rae" and if you know Welsh, you know that it doesn't look anything like "Rae" (odd vowel pairings and weirdly placed consonants that seem to have no connection to the pronunciation). People seem sort of meh about my name until they see the spelling and then they think that it is just gorgeous! Cracks me up every time. I was just always sad that I couldn't get a monogrammed license place for my bike or a sign for my bedroom door, seriously something to consider when naming your children lol!

 

Just now, SorenaJ said:

You are putting words in my mouth. 

But they are the words that came out of your mouth!