Joy & Austin 31: Adding Evelyn Mae

[ADoyle90815]

I think in urban areas are more likely to allow VBAC's because those hospitals have the facilities to handle complications more than a hospital in a rural area. Urban hospitals are more likely to have NICU's even if they don't have a children's hospital connected to the main hospital, and they have several OBGYN's available for those deliveries. They're also capable of doing emergency C sections at the last minute if necessary.

[DLA]

Wouldn't Annabell's birth hade an impact on the VBAC?

[metheglyn]

26 minutes ago, DLA said:

Wouldn't Annabell's birth hade an impact on the VBAC?

It does appear as though she was delivered, given the photos. But she was only like 20 weeks gestation though, so would have been a lot smaller than Evelyn. I've never given birth and am not a medical professional, but I assume it would have been a different kind of labor in some ways than delivering an overdue full-term baby.

[Jana814]

2 hours ago, ADoyle90815 said:

I think in urban areas are more likely to allow VBAC's because those hospitals have the facilities to handle complications more than a hospital in a rural area. Urban hospitals are more likely to have NICU's even if they don't have a children's hospital connected to the main hospital, and they have several OBGYN's available for those deliveries. They're also capable of doing emergency C sections at the last minute if necessary.

My friend who I posted about having a VBAC did so because the hospital she delivered at is exactly what you described. 

[Grace]

3 hours ago, ADoyle90815 said:

I think in urban areas are more likely to allow VBAC's because those hospitals have the facilities to handle complications more than a hospital in a rural area. Urban hospitals are more likely to have NICU's even if they don't have a children's hospital connected to the main hospital, and they have several OBGYN's available for those deliveries. They're also capable of doing emergency C sections at the last minute if necessary.

The reason the hospital in Northwest Arkansas gave for not doing VBAC was that they didn't have anesthesiology 24/7.....Which was so stupid because non-VBAC births can result in emergency c-sections too and they accepted trauma patients in the middle of the night...they just called in the NA on call. I think at one point only one hospital anywhere near Little Rock would do them. I'm pretty sure every hospital locally does them now.

[JinAndBonnets]

On 9/8/2020 at 1:37 PM, DLA said:

Wouldn't Annabell's birth hade an impact on the VBAC?

Annabell’s birth does increase her chance at success because it showed her uterus responded appropriately to likely cytotec (which it’s okay to use in vbacs with a loss prior to 28 weeks). It also shows that her cervix was able to dilate. It’s not as reassuring as a term delivery but now that she has had this kiddo vaginally her likelihood of success is even higher than someone with no history of a birth. 

[Mama Mia]

On 9/6/2020 at 1:47 AM, indianabones said:

I can't imagine putting on a full face of makeup once I knew I was 8 cm dilated. I can totally understand why Joy did it, given her Instagram/People Magazine shots, but yeesh. I'm surprised they added that part into the YouTube video. Yet another reason I'm happy not to have grown up (and still remain, like Joy is) in front of an audience!

I have a very outgoing family member, who is a nurse, and extremely outdoorsy and fun loving and talks non-stop and shares EVERYTHING, in graphic detail, on social media - and for her 1st child’s birth she put on full-makeup and did a basic photo shoot of labor that she posted about 30 seconds after he was born. It was something. 

[AussieKrissy]

3 hours ago, Mama Mia said:

I have a very outgoing family member, who is a nurse, and extremely outdoorsy and fun loving and talks non-stop and shares EVERYTHING, in graphic detail, on social media - and for her 1st child’s birth she put on full-makeup and did a basic photo shoot of labor that she posted about 30 seconds after he was born. It was something. 

Oh god now I want to see lol. 

[ophelia]

Yeah me too. I'm such a bad person.

I'll see myself out.

 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

On 9/8/2020 at 3:41 PM, Grace said:

The reason the hospital in Northwest Arkansas gave for not doing VBAC was that they didn't have anesthesiology 24/7.....Which was so stupid because non-VBAC births can result in emergency c-sections too and they accepted trauma patients in the middle of the night...they just called in the NA on call. I think at one point only one hospital anywhere near Little Rock would do them. I'm pretty sure every hospital locally does them now.

Hospitals don't like to pay to have anesthesiologist sitting around. When I was laboring w/ my son, in Des Moines, IA (with a population in the entire metro area, including suburbs of over 1 million people) they didn't have an anesthesiologist in house at 5 pm, granted it was Thanksgiving day, but still, I was one of 20 women who delivered that day. In a metro area that size, on a holiday you can't tell me someone isn't going to need emergency surgery, SOMEWHERE? What if one of us laboring mamas needed a crash c/section and they had to wait for an NA to show up, they have to be w/in 20 minutes of the hospital, 20 minutes is a dead baby or dead mom and baby. I had to wait an hour to get my epidural, after 17 hours of pitocin induced back labor, because after they called for me they needed to do an emergency c/section on another mama who hadn't had an epi yet either. 

[Meggo]

6 hours ago, Mama Mia said:

I have a very outgoing family member, who is a nurse, and extremely outdoorsy and fun loving and talks non-stop and shares EVERYTHING, in graphic detail, on social media - and for her 1st child’s birth she put on full-makeup and did a basic photo shoot of labor that she posted about 30 seconds after he was born. It was something. 

I worked with someone who was ALL about her makeup. Like - the FULL on makeup, hair - the whole nine. She used to work out at lunch and come back looking pristine. Very strange. So she sent pics from when she had her daughter. Sitting up in bed, in a brought-from-home (ie - not hospital issue) gown/robe whatever - and the FULL on hair & makeup. Like it was NBD that she just pushed out this human. 

I haven't given birth - but I'm pretty sure I'd look like death warmed over that had been hit by a mack truck. 
 

 

[viii]

Do we know for sure that Joy had a VBAC? I haven't watched their Youtube so I don't know if she's talked about it. 

Healthy baby and momma doesn't necessarily mean she didn't have another c-section. 

[Italiangirl]

Yes is sure she has had a vbac I haven't seen the video, but there is a recap here somewhere, and I think it was also stated on Instagram comment or so. My brain is already fried today sorry I can't help you more 

[SassyPants]

5 minutes ago, viii said:

Do we know for sure that Joy had a VBAC? I haven't watched their Youtube so I don't know if she's talked about it. 

Healthy baby and momma doesn't necessarily mean she didn't have another c-section. 

No, she had a VBAC-

[metheglyn]

1 hour ago, viii said:

Do we know for sure that Joy had a VBAC? I haven't watched their Youtube so I don't know if she's talked about it. 

Healthy baby and momma doesn't necessarily mean she didn't have another c-section. 

This is not a talking-heads kind of video, it's self-recorded bits of the time spent in Joy's hospital room. The majority of the video itself is of the labor process and it ends *just* after Evelyn is born.  The footage of the moment of the birth is actually obscured by Austin  standing next to Joy in front of the camera (and the camera had been understandably pointed toward the head of the bed throughout), but there was lots of footage of Joy during the whole process and the last shot of the video is of an overwhelmed Joy leaning back onto the bed with Austin saying "Here she is, here she is". It's *definitely* a VBAC. 

Edited September 10, 2020 by metheglyn
proofreading is your friend

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

5 hours ago, Meggo said:

I worked with someone who was ALL about her makeup. Like - the FULL on makeup, hair - the whole nine. She used to work out at lunch and come back looking pristine. Very strange. So she sent pics from when she had her daughter. Sitting up in bed, in a brought-from-home (ie - not hospital issue) gown/robe whatever - and the FULL on hair & makeup. Like it was NBD that she just pushed out this human. 

I haven't given birth - but I'm pretty sure I'd look like death warmed over that had been hit by a mack truck. 

I've given birth twice, the 1st time I labored for 22 hours and pushed for 4 and then had a c/section, I did look like I'd been hit by a mac truck, felt like it too. I had busted blood vessels in my eyes and face. No amount of make up in the world could have made me look like I hadn't had a serious medical issue. 

My Aunt is still like this about her hair & make up, my uncle, didn't see her w/o her hair & make up for the 1st 4 or 5 years they were married, and she had 2 kids in 11 months. She had to let a bit go for about 2 years as she battled ovarian cancer, but she rarely let anyone see her w/o her wig & some make up on.  

[Iamtheway]

4 hours ago, Meggo said:

I haven't given birth - but I'm pretty sure I'd look like death warmed over that had been hit by a mack truck. 

This is a pretty accurate description of what I looked like after my 53 hours of labour. But to be fair, it’s also a pretty accurate description of what I look like every morning when I wake up. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

My mother recently told me after my older brother was born, she mostly forgot how horrible labor was until she was pregnant with me and went to a lamaze class.  She said all of a sudden she had a moment when it all rushed back to her and she thought, "what have I done?!"

[SassyPants]

3 minutes ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

My mother recently told me after my older brother was born, she mostly forgot how horrible labor was until she was pregnant with me and went to a lamaze class.  She said all of a sudden she had a moment when it all rushed back to her and she thought, "what have I done?!"

I had a friend who stated, and I quote, “the pain is still fresh” 3 years after having her first. When her first was 5.5, she did go on to have a second.

[AussieKrissy]

6 minutes ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

My mother recently told me after my older brother was born, she mostly forgot how horrible labor was until she was pregnant with me and went to a lamaze class.  She said all of a sudden she had a moment when it all rushed back to her and she thought, "what have I done?!"

My friend was like that as she walked towards me with her waters dripping on the carpet, I was coming in to look after her son so she could go to hospital. It all came flooding back what she was in for. Lol she managed ok. 

[SorenaJ]

Do Duggars/fundies in general have any ceremonies for newborns? Do they have any religious baby blessings/thanksgiving/dedication ceremonies? I believe Alyssa Webster had one for one of her kids? Is there any particular thing that is the "norm"? Do they practice believers baptism? 

[whitney37354]

16 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I had a friend who stated, and I quote, “the pain is still fresh” 3 years after having her first. When her first was 5.5, she did go on to have a second.

My baby is 15 years old and the pain is still fresh.  It's a good thing I wanted to be "one and done" before I had her.  I had a bad case of "Doctor Scissorhands" and a 4th degree episiotomy, so my delivery story will never be told to an expecting mother!  I really should have had a c-section.

 

DD knows her birth story and says she will adopt...?

Edited September 11, 2020 by whitney37354

[just_ordinary]

1 hour ago, SorenaJ said:

Do Duggars/fundies in general have any ceremonies for newborns? Do they have any religious baby blessings/thanksgiving/dedication ceremonies? I believe Alyssa Webster had one for one of her kids? Is there any particular thing that is the "norm"? Do they practice believers baptism? 

I think some do a blessing (the LDS community does) but I don’t think baby christenings are the „norm“ as they are for European Christians. Their Christenings seem to be much later. What I would like to know- as we christened our children as babies they have communion of some sort when they are older and decide for themselves if they want to be members of the Church. The Christening is more a celebration of new life and the welcoming into the family of the congregation and often a big family occasion to welcome the new member into your family. It also kind of feeds the hope that your child is now also under God’s protection as it was formally introduced- hard to explain but it gives this sort of extra comfort to some. The godparents are there to help raising the child in a Christian way - whatever that means, it is mostly a formality today and in our Protestant churches you can have catholic or atheist witnesses instead. I guess Fundies don’t have that?

[JanasTattooParlor]

2 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

Do Duggars/fundies in general have any ceremonies for newborns? Do they have any religious baby blessings/thanksgiving/dedication ceremonies? I believe Alyssa Webster had one for one of her kids? Is there any particular thing that is the "norm"? Do they practice believers baptism? 

I feel like I remember someone having a dedication for a newborn, but I think it’s a Bates who I’m thinking of and not a Duggar. I grew up Southern Baptist and we had baby dedications when a family had a newborn. It was just a small little ceremony at the beginning of church welcoming the baby into the church and the parents promising to raise their child in the church. The Duggars, like most Baptists, do believe in a believers baptism though. So you get to decide when you get baptized. However, as we’ve seen a lot over in JRod’s thread, kids get scared by their parents into thinking they’ll go to hell if they don’t get baptized so the kid says they want to get baptized at as young as 4 because they've been told hell is a scary place where they will be separated from their family and the kid doesn’t want to go to hell. That’s not common for all Baptists, I have friends that didn’t get baptized until college, but it seems to be a point of pride with fundies that their kid gets baptized young. 

[purple_summer]

2 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

I think some do a blessing (the LDS community does) but I don’t think baby christenings are the „norm“ as they are for European Christians. Their Christenings seem to be much later. What I would like to know- as we christened our children as babies they have communion of some sort when they are older and decide for themselves if they want to be members of the Church. The Christening is more a celebration of new life and the welcoming into the family of the congregation and often a big family occasion to welcome the new member into your family. It also kind of feeds the hope that your child is now also under God’s protection as it was formally introduced- hard to explain but it gives this sort of extra comfort to some. The godparents are there to help raising the child in a Christian way - whatever that means, it is mostly a formality today and in our Protestant churches you can have catholic or atheist witnesses instead. I guess Fundies don’t have that?

I have multiple sets of godparents and my parents had two dedications for me to accommodate family in different areas. It’s more of a “thank you God for this baby bless the family etc” moment than a formal ceremony like you’d have in a Catholic Church. Not to be confused with baptism which happens later and is prerequisite for communion. 
 

Average age for baptism in my circle was 6. One of my cousins was first and then it felt like a race to be next. Crippling anxiety meant I didn’t get baptized until I was 14, my family wasn’t there and they’re still upset. It was fairly traumatic tbh.