Mary Kay Letourneau Died of Cancer

[adidas]

https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/news-life/mary-kay-letourneau-who-had-affair-with-underage-student-has-died/news-story/7db44d921532b773554a0ea8f8831c0a
 

Edited to make the title more accurate. I have nothing but loathing for this person. I hope the six children she gave birth to can heal and find peace. 

Edited July 9, 2020 by Coconut Flan

[smittykins]

And I hope Vili has a good support system now that he’s free of her.

[Giraffe]

From the link, “Who had affair with underage student”

I absolutely despise this is how she was seen. She was a CHILD RAPIST!!!! They* make it sound like they were two consenting adults and she just happened to be his teacher and he just happened to be her student. HE WAS A CHILD!!!!!!

 

*again, only from the words news.com used in the link. 

[viii]

And nothing of value was lost. 

[smittykins]

2 hours ago, Giraffe said:

From the link, “Who had affair with underage student”

I absolutely despise this is how she was seen. She was a CHILD RAPIST!!!! They* make it sound like they were two consenting adults and she just happened to be his teacher and he just happened to be her student. HE WAS A CHILD!!!!!!

 

*again, only from the words news.com used in the link. 

As has been pointed out many times, if it had been a male teacher and a 12-year-old female student, he would have been(rightfully)vilified.  I still can’t believe they were allowed to get married.

[Giraffe]

1 minute ago, smittykins said:

As has been pointed out many times, if it had been a male teacher and a 12-year-old female student, he would have been(rightfully)vilified.  I still can’t believe they were allowed to get married.

Absolutely!!! The whole thing was horrific! I hope he gets help and I hope their daughters get intense therapy. 

[louisa05]

Just made the mistake of reading the comments on an article about her death. Please, stop the world, because I would like to go ahead and get off now. 

The majority of commenters seemed to have no problem with her actions. Among the phrases used were "tragic love story", "unique relationship", "unconventional beginning" and "she made a small mistake". I suggested to the last poster that it was a very large mistake that was specifically felony child sex abuse and was challenged with the answer "So you've never made a mistake in your life". Like all of us, I have made mistakes. Felony sexual abuse of a child is not one of them. Because that's more than a "small mistake", it is not only crime; it is deviance. Other posters were apparently touched that he was with her when he died and felt that that proved it was all "true love" from the beginning. One poster with a male  name declared that she was pretty, articulate and well put together which apparently excused the whole thing. 

And, as has been pointed out in this thread already, no one would be saying disgusting stuff like this had this been the story of a 34 year old man impregnating a 12 year old girl. 

[hoipolloi]

She was a sexual predator and no different than Jeffrey Epstein except, as far as we know, she had one victim.

[nokidsmom]

2 hours ago, louisa05 said:

The majority of commenters seemed to have no problem with her actions. Among the phrases used were "tragic love story", "unique relationship", "unconventional beginning" and "she made a small mistake".

Amazing how many people want to spin this as some great love story.  A 34 year old teacher preying on a 12 year old is no love story.   It was beyond inappropriate, downright effed up and also a crime.  And considering she immediately violated the terms of her release from jail, it's like WTF she didn't learn anything from the already serious consequences experienced already.    She impacted her 6 kids with her so-called "love story".   4 kids lost their mother when she went to jail and putting them through the anguish of divorcing their father, she brought 2 more kids into the world leaving the teenage "love of her life" raising those same kids while she did her time.    Her actions were not just predatory, they were off the charts selfish, and she never seemed to fully understand the impact of all she did.    

6 hours ago, smittykins said:

And I hope Vili has a good support system now that he’s free of her.

I read that one of the reasons he filed for divorce was that he started realizing that the relationship was unhealthy.    I honestly hope he and his daughters get into some therapy (if they are not already) because all of them were involved in a sick situation.   The daughters can still love their mother but realize that what they grew up in was not normal.   

 

Edited July 9, 2020 by nokidsmom
addition

[Seahorse Wrangler]

I've seen far too many comments about "how lucky he was", "boys will be boys" and "what teenaged boy wouldn't want to have sex with a hot teacher" in the past couple of days.

 

[nokidsmom]

28 minutes ago, Seahorse Wrangler said:

I've seen far too many comments about "how lucky he was", "boys will be boys" and "what teenaged boy wouldn't want to have sex with a hot teacher" in the past couple of days.

Not knowing the ages of the commenters but gotta ask if they would feel the same if this was their 12 year old son getting involved with the hot teacher.   Or if their mother / wife was the hot teacher who disrupted their lives over getting involved with a student. Bet the answers would be a lot different.  

[louisa05]

Ran across this interesting article yesterday that discusses how this case got turned into something “romantic” by the press. So gross: 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-features/mary-kay-letourneau-vili-fualauu-relationship-media-child-rape-tryst-1025466/amp/

[Seahorse Wrangler]

35 minutes ago, nokidsmom said:

Not knowing the ages of the commenters but gotta ask if they would feel the same if this was their 12 year old son getting involved with the hot teacher.   Or if their mother / wife was the hot teacher who disrupted their lives over getting involved with a student. Bet the answers would be a lot different.  

It was mainly on the book of faces newspaper and news stations pages. Most of them appeared to be mid-40's to mid-50's.  Going by some people of that age I do know personally , they'd be cheering their son on.

But gathering up a posse to lynch a male teacher doing the same thing to their under-aged daughter and getting her pregnant.

Edited July 10, 2020 by Seahorse Wrangler
excess redundant words

[nausicaa]

On 7/9/2020 at 3:53 PM, nokidsmom said:

I read that one of the reasons he filed for divorce was that he started realizing that the relationship was unhealthy. I honestly hope he and his daughters get into some therapy (if they are not already) because all of them were involved in a sick situation.   The daughters can still love their mother but realize that what they grew up in was not normal.   

I bet becoming the age she was when this started was a big eye opener for him in just how much more maturity, life experience, power and control she had over him. Has anyone seen this bizarre interview where she keeps asking him "Who was the boss? Who was the boss?" clearly trying to still manipulate him? At the 10:10 mark for those who don't want to watch the whole thing.  Also if you had any doubts that this woman is batshit crazy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mowKsGWuW4&t=27s

 

[moreorlessnu]

She stuck to her narrative that the two of them "just had a connection". 

I also think the fact that she was beautiful and acted girlish (and in love) no matter how many year passed allowed the media to view her more favorably than if she had not been so personally appealing. 

[nausicaa]

I've mentioned this story before, but Letourneau passing away has brought all of this up again. 

A former friend of mine covers for her sister in law who began to date the 14 year old son of a family friend when she was 21 and his babysitter. He hadn't even started high school yet. The family originally told people she was 21 and he was 17 (which is also the story I was first told). They are now married, and my former friend has argued she doesn't see the problem because "women don't like sex." Former friend and her sister were bridesmaids in the wedding, though she has even admitted she sees psychological damage in the husband from starting this at such a young age. 

The family is wealthy, white, and very liberal. I'm so tired of their hypocrisy in posting things about #TimesUp and #MeToo. The parents apparently only acted to cover this up. The father of the rapist daughter is an Episcopal priest and I've even thought of sending an anonymous letter to his parish telling them what he is complicit in. I'm just so angry that the people involved in this get all the passes because they say the right things and look a certain way. I want to do something at least to call them out, but don't know quite what. 

[louisa05]

8 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

I've mentioned this story before, but Letourneau passing away has brought all of this up again. 

A former friend of mine covers for her sister in law who began to date the 14 year old son of a family friend when she was 21 and his babysitter. He hadn't even started high school yet. The family originally told people she was 21 and he was 17 (which is also the story I was first told). They are now married, and my former friend has argued she doesn't see the problem because "women don't like sex." Former friend and her sister were bridesmaids in the wedding, though she has even admitted she sees psychological damage in the husband from starting this at such a young age. 

The family is wealthy, white, and very liberal. I'm so tired of their hypocrisy in posting things about #TimesUp and #MeToo. The parents apparently only acted to cover this up. The father of the rapist daughter is an Episcopal priest and I've even thought of sending an anonymous letter to his parish telling them what he is complicit in. I'm just so angry that the people involved in this get all the passes because they say the right things and look a certain way. I want to do something at least to call them out, but don't know quite what. 

My first year of teaching (at Christian school!), I had a 15 year old boy in class who was dating a 22 year old woman he met at church.  Parents were fine with it. She taught him to drive which the kids all thought was really cool. ? They got married as soon as he graduated and divorced a couple of years later. 

[Pecansforeveryone]

I watched about 40 minutes of Mary Kay Letourneau's autobiography. Bizarre that she had friends who didn't see it as wrong. Seriously, Mary Kay was a mother herself. What would she have said her daughters with Villi had been pursued by a 30 year old man? She just came across as very stunted in every way possible. 

[nausicaa]

Just now, Pecansforeveryone said:

I watched about 40 minutes of Mary Kay Letourneau's autobiography. Bizarre that she had friends who didn't see it as wrong. Seriously, Mary Kay was a mother herself. What would she have said her daughters with Villi had been pursued by a 30 year old man? She just came across as very stunted in every way possible. 

Yes, she comes off as very stunted even in that interview when she's 56. She was still arguing that thirteen year olds aren't children, which, excuse me, they are? I thought the interviewer mostly did a good job but I wish he had pushed back more on that. 

[nokidsmom]

15 hours ago, nausicaa said:

I bet becoming the age she was when this started was a big eye opener for him in just how much more maturity, life experience, power and control she had over him.

I did notice that when he filed for legal separation, he was around the same age as she was when they first got involved.   I wondered if there was some sort of realization then.   There are reports that the separation helped him gain some perspective and I suspect that now she is gone, there may be even more of a shift in how he and even his daughters view the relationship with her.

@nausicaaand @louisa05 interesting you both know families where they were totes OK with a family member involved in this inappropriate student/teacher relationship and go to the extent they do to rationalize it.  

@nausicaaI don't know what you do as far as notifying the parish but I bet you are not the only one who knows about it and is put off by this.  Is this the reason why the former friend is a former friend?

 

Edited July 11, 2020 by nokidsmom
Finished sentence

[nausicaa]

Just now, nokidsmom said:

I don't know what you do as far as notifying the parish but I bet you are not the only one who knows about it and is put off by this.  Is this the reason why the former friend is a former friend?

Oh, there's a whole list of reasons why former friend is a former friend. In short, she was the sort of person who depicted herself as a hyper sensitive "empath" when really she was just narcissistic and excellent at manipulating others into second guessing themselves. With time and exposure, this revealed itself.

The "women don't like sex anyway" conversation happened toward the end of our friendship. We were thirty, and it was very eye opening that she could defend this (while holding her young son on her lap) and made me realize I wasn't crazy and she had some serious issues.

Edited July 11, 2020 by nausicaa

[louisa05]

2 hours ago, nokidsmom said:

I did notice that when he filed for legal separation, he was around the same age as she was when they first got involved.   I wondered if there was some sort of realization then.   There are reports that the separation helped him gain some perspective and I suspect that now she is gone, there may be even more of a shift in how he and even his daughters view the relationship with her.

@nausicaaand @louisa05 interesting you both know families where they were totes OK with a family member involved in this inappropriate student/teacher relationship and go to the extent they do to rationalize it.  

@nausicaaI don't know what you do as far as notifying the parish but I bet you are not the only one who knows about it and is put off by this.  Is this the reason why the former friend is a former friend?

 

The woman in that relationship was not a teacher. Even the Christian school would not have allowed that to continue. She was someone at the family’s church. She was finishing a college degree when first dating this boy. I don’t know what she did after that. 
I was curious about what became of my student.  Found him on Facebook in four seconds. He remarried four years ago and now has a baby daughter. We heard at school that the marriage to the older woman lasted less than two years. 
This was all over 20 years ago.  

[Pleiades_06]

17 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

I watched about 40 minutes of Mary Kay Letourneau's autobiography. Bizarre that she had friends who didn't see it as wrong. Seriously, Mary Kay was a mother herself. What would she have said her daughters with Villi had been pursued by a 30 year old man? She just came across as very stunted in every way possible. 

When interviewed alone, Vili seemed aware that something was not right about how she talked about their relationship. And about the fact that he had limited power and agency at 12. But when he was with her it was like he had Stockholm Syndrome. Her hold over him was disturbing to say the least.

[hoipolloi]

18 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

She just came across as very stunted in every way possible. 

This is not an excuse of any sort for her criminal behavior but Letourneau was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The linked article has an interesting discussion of the disorder and its implications for Letourneau's criminal behavior.

 

 

[Giraffe]

Wow. Watched the interview @nausicaa shared. That was gut-wrenching. She was still treating him like he was the 8 year old when they first met! Those girls probably had a hellish childhood being raised by her (once she was released from prison). I hope they can all find peace and healing now that she’s dead.