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Boyer Sisters Part 8: Adventures in Parenting While Possibly Denying Science


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On 9/12/2020 at 3:59 AM, SolomonFundy said:

Very condensed overview:

Thank you!! I can remember most of that in a random fashion, but without names or events being attached to those particular names, lol. Although I do always forget just how recent their financial difficulties were. I know plenty of fundies like to marry them off early, but I also wonder if this influenced them at all (possibly on a subconscious level). 

On 9/12/2020 at 7:03 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I just can’t get over how young she is. I can’t imagine pushing my daughters to get married young and start having children before they even know who they are or what they want in life. 

Honestly, I would have a very hard time being happy about it, much less pushing them into it. My young adult kids fall right into their age range -  both would be married if they followed the same timeline, and that's crazypants! They've lived away from home (albeit in a dorm, but no parental eyes on them), they've had jobs with fair amounts of responsibility, they've traveled without us, they've met so many people from all walks of life . . . and I still think they're far too young to get married. 

If it happens, we will at least know it's not due to getting drawn into the excitement of a wedding. With one still in college and one just finished, they know very well that there is noooo money for a wedding, lol. I always say that our contribution to their weddings was a wonderful education. 

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Your personality and brain aren't even done developing until ~25.  Getting married before that point always seems crazypants to me, for that reason, and remembering how different I was at 18 vs 21 vs 25+.  But yes, the idea is to get them married and popping out babies ASAP once they're legal because who has time to sit down and contemplate your life or change your mind about things when you're exhausted and chasing a herd of children by the time you're old enough to drink, and even if you did, you have no way out anyway?

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On 8/15/2020 at 10:22 PM, teachergirl said:

and honey, you don't own that house.... If your very young marriage doesn't work out, you will be left vulnerable and without a way to support yourself.

Would love to know how much of Charlotte's earned money went into the down payment (at least 20%, right Charlotte? Since you're so savvy and responsible) on that house she "owns."

Then would love to know how much of that "earned money" came from a sinecure provided by her dad, and how much from a job working for an unrelated person...

Someone is awfully smug for a 21 year old with no discernible accomplishments, job skills, or education. Does she not see that her "good choices" were basically the choice to have someone else provide her? She didn't work three jobs and invest her earnings wisely in the stock market. Take a seat, Lotte. 

23 hours ago, SolomonFundy said:

Unfortunately, this is the entire point of early marriage. Girls yoked to partners young enough that their husbands can "continue forming" them. 

Yes. This is why it annoys me whenever the young marriage topic comes up and people chime for pages about how they got married on their eighteenth birthday and still have the perfect marriage.

It's anecdata that ignores the underlying cultural reasoning behind young marriage. I also wonder just how healthy all those marriages are; plenty of people stay married only because they are scared of being alone.

Edited by nausicaa
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11 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Would love to know how much of Charlotte's earned money went into the down payment (at least 20%, right Charlotte? Since you're so savvy and responsible) on that house she "owns."

Then would love to know how much of that "earned money" came from a sinecure provided by her dad, and how much from a job working for an unrelated person...

Someone is awfully smug for a 21 year old with no discernible accomplishments, job skills, or education. Does she not see that her "good choices" were basically the choice to have someone else provide her? She didn't work three jobs and invest her earnings wisely in the stock market. Take a seat, Lotte. 

Yes. This is why it annoys me whenever the young marriage topic comes up and people chime for pages about how they got married on their eighteenth birthday and still have the perfect marriage.

It's anecdata that ignores the underlying cultural reasoning behind young marriage. I also wonder just how healthy all those marriages are; plenty of people stay married only because they are scared of being alone.

It’s funny because my sister got married young and she’s still married 20 years later. But she would probably flip the fuck out of her kids married as young as she did. 

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1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

It’s funny because my sister got married young and she’s still married 20 years later. But she would probably flip the fuck out of her kids married as young as she did. 

By my own standards today, and probably by cultural standards as well, I was young to get married at the age of 22. However, I once checked, and demographically, my cohort's median ago of first marriage for women was 22! That just seems so odd, forty years on. 

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I always say that I really had no idea what I was acutally agreeing to when we got married. I was young (20,21) and didn't really understand (totally thought I did though). We've been married for 15+ years now and we've grown together and work well as a team. BUT, I think some of it was dumb luck and I would never encourage my younger family members to marry or have children that young.

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On 9/12/2020 at 2:10 PM, SolomonFundy said:

Unfortunately, this is the entire point of early marriage. Girls yoked to partners young enough that their husbands can "continue forming" them. It's despicable, and the whole thing rests upon the dual edge of patriarchy enforcing hard limitations on opportunities for women, and teenage/young adult girls being assured that once they've formed the idea of becoming a helpmeet, they are now as smart as they'll ever need to be. This gives a little bubble of confidence that helps bolster them into believing that the one option they are offered in life is a choice they intentionally, rationally made. 

Well said. My parents had a really difficult marriage for this reason. My mom married very young and got pregnant on her honeymoon. She went straight from being a teenager living at home to a wife and a mother. My father had more life experience and failed relationships behind him, but he chose to marry someone like my mom who fit his sexist ideals of purity and naivety. He believed he needed a wife that he could mold and control. But as his career really took off in his 30's, he was soon mingling with educated, independent women that I'm sure he admired a lot. He resented my mom for filling the exact role that he picked her for, and resented tat they couldn't share more than a home and their children. My mom was long-suffering through those years, focusing on her many kids, but her self esteem was forever damaged. On the flip side and through his own fault, my father missed out on a truly satisfying marriage with a friend and an equal. Not to mention the financial pressure he felt his entire life raising a family of 8 on a single income. 

Traditional patriarchy hurts women and I believe it hurts men as well.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, Charlotte’s social media “hiatus” didn’t last very long... She’s back talking about how she met her husband only 2 years ago and they already have a baby. Maybe I just have trust issues, but that blows my mind. 

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1 hour ago, Marionette said:

Well, Charlotte’s social media “hiatus” didn’t last very long... She’s back talking about how she met her husband only 2 years ago and they already have a baby. Maybe I just have trust issues, but that blows my mind. 

My husband an I married after 2.5 years of being together. Then we had our first child 3 years after that. I can’t imagine meeting, getting married, and having a baby so quickly. I guess I need a lot of time to make huge life decisions. 

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30 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

My husband an I married after 2.5 years of being together. Then we had our first child 3 years after that. I can’t imagine meeting, getting married, and having a baby so quickly. I guess I need a lot of time to make huge life decisions. 

Me too. I feel like I would have to know someone for at least 2 years to even date them (at least seriously?)... And then take my time after that. Haha! 

There’s a particular fundie girl in my old circle who made a post the other day about how she met her fiancé a year ago, they started dating 5 months ago, got engaged 2 months ago and are getting married in 3 weeks. She just turned 18 — 4 months ago!! I don’t know how these people do it. 

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3 minutes ago, Marionette said:

Me too. I feel like I would have to know someone for at least 2 years to even date them (at least seriously?)... And then take my time after that. Haha! 

There’s a particular fundie girl in my old circle who made a post the other day about how she met her fiancé a year ago, they started dating 5 months ago, got engaged 2 months ago and are getting married in 3 weeks. She just turned 18 — 4 months ago!! I don’t know how these people do it. 

I remember telling my now husband that I couldn’t wait for the newness to wear off in our relationship. Because I had been fooled so many times before. The newness of a relationship would blind me to the faults or problems in our relationship. It usually took me about 4 months for the newness to wear off. And then I felt like I could actually date the person for real. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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I met my husband when I was 17, we were dating for 5 years before getting married and had our first child 8 years later. we waited so long bc we moved from Europe to North America, I started going back to school here and wanted to finish my degree first (which I did). Our son was born 13 months after my graduation.

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Charlotte has announced she is deleting all social media. (I’m on mobile, so I don’t know how to link the post). I think this is a good call on her part... if it lasts. 

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Just about to post the same thing. Charlotte is deleting all her SM now after researching the dangers of TikTok, the Chinese communist party and Google. I give it until the end of the year.

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My eyes just rolled clean out of my head. 

Basically Lotta read a whole lotta conspiracy theories online, got scared, and will now delete her social media. 

 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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She hasn't deleted IG yet -- just made it private.

Agree that her "quitting" of social media will last till maybe Christmas.

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I hope she stays off for at least a couple of years, ideally longer. I wouldn't wish true isolation on anyone so socially minded (which is what she'll be confronted with in the absence of her beloved digital head-pats), but she's precisely the kind of gullible jackass that is already choking the potential of platforms like Instagram. The world doesn't need Charlotte Boyerberry's opinions on anything. Charlotte, however, needs the world's opinions and attention pretty badly. 

There's really no way for her to work this to her benefit without gaining a lot more confidence, intelligence, and critical thinking skills. Since none of those improvements are likely to happen, I tend to agree with others here. She'll ride the wave of "I deleted everything!!" to her irl social circle until it wears thin, and then she'll create a new account name and go hard with some MLM nonsense in an effort to rebrand herself again. Rinse, repeat.

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  • 2 years later...
  • 2 months later...
On 9/1/2023 at 9:24 PM, thisjuststinks said:

Have we heard anything from the Boyer girls in the last three years? Did they just drop of the face of the social media earth?

Only Brigid. She’s studying to be a pro-life pro-Christian doula. She’s going to make a horrible doula by the way:

ADD387E8-3EED-49F5-A23B-2E9542476A5F.jpeg

She makes it sound like miscarriage is because of the devil and you just have to pray harder and you won’t miscarry. She’s had 3 miscarriages btw. Does she think she didn’t pray hard enough? Does she blame herself? 

8A55944E-3920-4CBC-9397-EF07279FD91B.jpeg

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It’s not just fundies who miscarry, Brigid. Plenty of people, religious or not, miscarry. It’s very common. What asinine comments.

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If that’s the kind stuff that she spews, she shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near a pregnant or laboring woman.

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I perused her recent posts, and I was reminded of Jill Rod.  So much religion. And so boring compared to her sewing posts. 

And that second post shared above by @JermajestyDuggar is just toxic.  No, Brigid; Satan is not after your embryos and fetuses.  Satan probably doesn’t give a rat’s ass about your pregnancies.  And God didn’t smite you by taking them away.  Mourn your losses as you see fit, but shift your focus to the four children you have; they’re the ones who need their mother.  

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1 hour ago, LanaBanana said:

3 miscarriages plus 4 kids in 7 (?) years is crazy.

There are so many fundies with way more. Like Jill Rod who had 7 in 7 years. 

17 hours ago, hoipolloi said:

If that’s the kind stuff that she spews, she shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near a pregnant or laboring woman.

I totally agree. But there’s a big market for doulas amongst the fundie community. So I’m sure she will find pregnant women to “serve.” 

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  • 2 months later...

I just want to pop in and say Brigid posted a video as to why she hasn’t been in Instagram lately and she says it’s become toxic. She says that you can’t post anything positive without another mom coming in and disagreeing with you so vehemently. She says, “if you agree, good. If you don’t agree, keep your mouth shut. We as women used to know how to do that.”

 

She is absolutely insufferable! How could anyone want her as a doula? 

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