Not Enough Nelsons: When Mormon Naming Goes Too Far

[clueliss]

Yesterday’s video was a “room” ( actually her apartment) reveal for Journee.  They briefly discuss her special needs.  And it sounds like there will be a how we met Journee video coming.  

[front hugs > duggs]

I didn't realize she had special needs. I know Tiffany mentioned how Journee really values her quiet and alone time, and it seems like TIffany encourages that. Hopefully she never feels obligated to film and only does so when she wants to. I'm thinking it's easier since she has her own apartment.

[clueliss]

The apartment is near the school she attends.  It sounds like it was somewhat close to where Kennadee lives/goes to school.  

[Maggie Mae]

34 minutes ago, clueliss said:

The apartment is near the school she attends.  It sounds like it was somewhat close to where Kennadee lives/goes to school.  

I'm pretty sure it's an on campus apartment at BYU, from context. 

I too didn't realize she had special needs. They had mentioned that she was cross-eyed at the time of adoption but that was it. 

Did anyone else notice that when they entered the apartment one of the adult women - I think Kass - commented on how JourNee had a picture of the prophet on her fridge? But when they went back and did the before and after, it was neither in the before or after. 

Can you imagine being one of these kids in a mega family? You meet someone, mention that your sisters came by to redecorate, they ask how many sisters you have and the answer just sounds unbelievable to most people. And overwhelming. 

[Natalie22]

Bringing it back to the dream thing, I doubt it's as weird for LDS people (still a bit strange).  Mormons believe in personal prophecy and women are seen as having the special role of caring for the family.  I can't say I know a ton about how those two things connect, but it would make sense to me for women in the LDS chruch to fully believe any dreams they had with regards to family. 

[Aine]

On 9/17/2020 at 7:13 PM, neurogirl said:

On the dream thing - I've been so horribly stressed with mental health in the toilet trying to finish my PhD during Covid, husband laid off, being away from all our support system, etc. My grandfather, who passed away in 2013, was always so supportive of my education. He also took my family to Disney twice when I was a child. A few nights ago after a few days of being teary and on the end of my rope, I had a dream that he took me to Disney World just the two of us. I was my current age but there was no covid and no crowds. No speeches from him, no premonitions, but its given me such peace as well. I'm not really religious but it was so precisely timed, vivid, and relieving that it really did feel like he was giving me a break. ❤️ 

This is so similar to a dream I had last week. I've been going through a tough time too and I'm not ready to share much of it IRL with people or online but it also had to do with mental health struggles currently, PhD program, and a number of other stressors and all of the above has been compounded by Covid. There are a lot of big decisions I've had to make lately where there was no "good" option and therefore my anxiety has been severe, and I've also generally been feeling like a failure in every domain of my life. My grandparents raised me for a lot of my childhood and both died within 6 months of each other a couple of years ago while I was here in the US and I couldn't afford to return for their funerals and I haven't been home in 4 years now. I've just felt lost lately. But I had a dream last week that was so vivid, and I'm generally a vivid dreamer but this was different in that there was no weird story lines in my dream and there was no trauma-related elements that usually account for many of my most vivid dreams.

I'm sure there was a story that led up to this but I don't remember it so I don't know. What I do know is my Nana was sitting in my armchair in my bedroom here in the US, I was me right now, and I was sitting between her legs on the floor with my head leaning against the inside of her knee, one arm wrapped around her calf, and she was stroking my hair and forehead in this sweeping motion she always did where her palm would go across my forehead and her fingers through my hair. This is exactly how I'd always sit, especially once I got too heavy for her lap. She was singing hymns to me ('Be Thou My Vision', the Lourdes hymn, and 'Lord of Hopefulness'), like she would do before bed when I was a child as she stroked my head. I started crying into her leg and she put her other hand at the base of my head firmly and comfortingly as she kept stroking my hair and singing softly until I stopped sobbing. I swear I could smell her. I woke up with my eyes all puffy as though I had been crying and I just felt like I could still faintly smell her and feel her touch.

I've only dreamed of my Nana a few times since her death. Each time, it was vivid like this but slightly different. Before she died, she'd make cameos in dreams or being in mundane dreams all the time even when I lived abroad away from her but that stopped when she died. Lately, I have physically ached for my Nana and Papa, like I did when I was a little kid and not coping. I'm an atheist but I don't know...that dream brought with it the first comfort I've had in months and I don't have any desire to defend it or rationalize it to myself or anyone else. It's nice and brings me some peace to think she came in my dream because I needed her.

[clueliss]

The how we met Journee video is posted

[heyitsjess]

Honestly, I really like the Nelsons. I'm not religious, so I tend to feel creeped out by very religious people, but they genuinely seem like a nice, happy family. The mom always talks about all of her kids in a really loving way, and they seem to respect each kid's personality and individuality. I remember that in this one video she answered a question about Bridger's tattoos, and said that although she doesn't like it, he's free to make his own choices and she loves him anyway, so I think that's really nice. Also, this week's video about JourNee's adoption made me cry. It's good to know that there's people who are willing and able to provide a home and a loving family to children who are struggling. And it also made me realize that maybe Journee isn't shy, she just struggles a bit with her speech! But it's great to see that her parents want her to be independent and her own person. 

[jegfile]

I have a question (really, not judging) about the latest video. Everyone I know in my country adopts dogs from rescues. I can't even think of a puppy store that's near me. In a big mall in another town I know there's a store that sells dog stuff but not dogs themselves. Is this weird? I was just really surprised that they didn't even consider a rescue and that there were so many pet stores to check out!

[Maggie Mae]

I haven't watched the latest video yet, but I know in my area, the only dogs available at the animal shelter are pit bulls or huskies, usually mixes of one or both. There are a ton of rescues that seem to "rescue" everything else before anyone has a chance to adopt. Which is fine, but they have their own standards to who can adopt what dog and not everyone meets them. I live in a house, my partner runs up to 50 miles a week and does ultra marathons, I've run up to 25 miles a week, yet since we don't have a fenced in yard (corner lot), we can't adopt from any of the rescues. We don't want a pitbull mix, and I don't want the double coat challenge of the huskie. So we've been looking at out-of-state breeders so we can get the kind of dog that would work with our lifestyle. Even though I think a mixed breed mutt would be nice, we'll probably get something bougie. 

[Pecansforeveryone]

I know there are many private breeders available. I didn't know pet stores in malls were still a thing as I barely knew malls were still a thing. If the main type of dog available is a pitbull mix, then I personally wouldn't get a rescue. 

[forgetmenow]

Not all rescues have the same requirements.  I have a fully fenced yard, so that issue has never come up with for any of my dog adoptions, but my best friend was able to adopt from a rescue even though she lives in an apartment, and obviously doesn't have a yard, let alone a fence.

I'd say just check with a few rescues and see what they require.  Petfinder is a great resource.

Edited October 13, 2020 by forgetmenow

[closetcagebaby]

8 minutes ago, forgetmenow said:

Not all rescues have the same requirements.  I have a fully fenced yard, so that issue has never come up with for any of my dog adoptions, but my best friend was able to adopt from a rescue even though she lives in an apartment, and obviously doesn't have a yard, let alone a fence.

I'd say just check with a few rescues and see what they require.  Petfinder is a great resource.

where @Maggie Mae is doesn’t have a whole lot of options, really. It’s true about huskies being the only option. 

[forgetmenow]

21 minutes ago, closetcagebaby said:

where @Maggie Mae is doesn’t have a whole lot of options, really. It’s true about huskies being the only option. 

Totally understandable, I just didn't want anyone to think that not having a fenced yard was universally disqualifying.  And I like getting info out about Petfinder and (for those in my area) the great rescues I have used.

Edited October 13, 2020 by forgetmenow
clarification

[Cults-r-us]

On 9/21/2020 at 6:28 PM, Aine said:

This is so similar to a dream I had last week. I've been going through a tough time too and I'm not ready to share much of it IRL with people or online but it also had to do with mental health struggles currently, PhD program, and a number of other stressors and all of the above has been compounded by Covid. There are a lot of big decisions I've had to make lately where there was no "good" option and therefore my anxiety has been severe, and I've also generally been feeling like a failure in every domain of my life. My grandparents raised me for a lot of my childhood and both died within 6 months of each other a couple of years ago while I was here in the US and I couldn't afford to return for their funerals and I haven't been home in 4 years now. I've just felt lost lately. But I had a dream last week that was so vivid, and I'm generally a vivid dreamer but this was different in that there was no weird story lines in my dream and there was no trauma-related elements that usually account for many of my most vivid dreams.

I'm sure there was a story that led up to this but I don't remember it so I don't know. What I do know is my Nana was sitting in my armchair in my bedroom here in the US, I was me right now, and I was sitting between her legs on the floor with my head leaning against the inside of her knee, one arm wrapped around her calf, and she was stroking my hair and forehead in this sweeping motion she always did where her palm would go across my forehead and her fingers through my hair. This is exactly how I'd always sit, especially once I got too heavy for her lap. She was singing hymns to me ('Be Thou My Vision', the Lourdes hymn, and 'Lord of Hopefulness'), like she would do before bed when I was a child as she stroked my head. I started crying into her leg and she put her other hand at the base of my head firmly and comfortingly as she kept stroking my hair and singing softly until I stopped sobbing. I swear I could smell her. I woke up with my eyes all puffy as though I had been crying and I just felt like I could still faintly smell her and feel her touch.

I've only dreamed of my Nana a few times since her death. Each time, it was vivid like this but slightly different. Before she died, she'd make cameos in dreams or being in mundane dreams all the time even when I lived abroad away from her but that stopped when she died. Lately, I have physically ached for my Nana and Papa, like I did when I was a little kid and not coping. I'm an atheist but I don't know...that dream brought with it the first comfort I've had in months and I don't have any desire to defend it or rationalize it to myself or anyone else. It's nice and brings me some peace to think she came in my dream because I needed her.

I hope so, too. My heart aches for you, Aine.

[GuineaPigCourtship]

I'm a vet and don't qualify with most rescues (cat or dog) because I work full time. The dogs available around me are mostly hound mixes transported from the south which I would never consider as I don't care for hounds. I also don't care for terriers or any other type of hunting dogs since we've got cats, Guinea pigs, and chickens.  We have 2 dogs and no plans for more for at least 10 years (waiting for the baby I'm gestating to be old enough for my peace of mind) so who knows where things will be then. No pet stores, though, that's an evil business.

[OyToTheVey]

On 10/12/2020 at 3:40 PM, Maggie Mae said:

I haven't watched the latest video yet, but I know in my area, the only dogs available at the animal shelter are pit bulls or huskies, usually mixes of one or both. There are a ton of rescues that seem to "rescue" everything else before anyone has a chance to adopt. Which is fine, but they have their own standards to who can adopt what dog and not everyone meets them. I live in a house, my partner runs up to 50 miles a week and does ultra marathons, I've run up to 25 miles a week, yet since we don't have a fenced in yard (corner lot), we can't adopt from any of the rescues. We don't want a pitbull mix, and I don't want the double coat challenge of the huskie. So we've been looking at out-of-state breeders so we can get the kind of dog that would work with our lifestyle. Even though I think a mixed breed mutt would be nice, we'll probably get something bougie. 

My cousin has a very hyper goldendoodle. I think you need a bigger dog that would love to run with you. He'd love it so much. He's also able to relax and sits with me while we cuddle and I give rubs. A doggie like that would be perfect for you. Gd I love that dog. I'd steal him if I wasn't in a small apt lol He gives the best cuddles. 

[smittykins]

I’ve noticed that most rentals in my area which allow dogs have bans on pits/pit mixes. ?

[Maggie Mae]

20 hours ago, OyToTheVey said:

My cousin has a very hyper goldendoodle. I think you need a bigger dog that would love to run with you. He'd love it so much. He's also able to relax and sits with me while we cuddle and I give rubs. A doggie like that would be perfect for you. Gd I love that dog. I'd steal him if I wasn't in a small apt lol He gives the best cuddles. 

I would love that, but I think he wants something a bit smaller. I'd also take a bernese, but they can't run as far as he'd like (but I'm fine with maxing out at 5 miles), and we do only have a queen sized bed. (We just assume all pets want to sleep with us). Thinking we'd like an Aussie or a border collie, but I'll look à bit more into the golden doodles, as we like retrievers a lot. 

[Cults-r-us]

On 9/21/2020 at 6:28 PM, Aine said:

 

Lately, I have physically ached for my Nana and Papa, like I did when I was a little kid and not coping. I'm an atheist but I don't know...that dream brought with it the first comfort I've had in months and I don't have any desire to defend it or rationalize it to myself or anyone else. It's nice and brings me some peace to think she came in my dream because I needed her.

Hugs and comfort to you, Aine!

[FiveAcres]

On 11/4/2020 at 12:52 PM, Maggie Mae said:

I would love that, but I think he wants something a bit smaller. I'd also take a bernese, but they can't run as far as he'd like (but I'm fine with maxing out at 5 miles), and we do only have a queen sized bed. (We just assume all pets want to sleep with us). Thinking we'd like an Aussie or a border collie, but I'll look à bit more into the golden doodles, as we like retrievers a lot. 

I am fairly certain that if you go to an Aussie or Border rescue and tell them you want a young dog that can run five miles they will embrace you with open arms (or air hugs, hopefully). The worst problem with these two breeds is an excess of energy so unless you are wanting to herd sheep, do agility, or something similar it is better to find quieter breeds.

[Tenyari]

Does Luke know how lucky he is to be named that? I hope he does. His poor siblings, those names are terrible to say the least.

[clueliss]

They posted NayVee’s adoption story yesterday.  

[Maggie Mae]

21 minutes ago, clueliss said:

They posted NayVee’s adoption story yesterday.  

Is it a different one? I thought they did hers first. 

3 hours ago, Tenyari said:

Does Luke know how lucky he is to be named that? I hope he does. His poor siblings, those names are terrible to say the least.

All the boys have it okay. Trey is just a nickname, because he's the third. Beckham is obviously after David Beckham, and Bridger isn't a bad name. Ledger is kind of odd, but not the worst. 

[clueliss]

Yes, this is a new one,  this isn’t the birth name Q&A or the guess who’s adopted series.