Lori Alexander 76: Ken Advises Saving?

[wallysmommy]

Years ago, my friend and I were on a cruise and we were lying on the deck while they were doing some kind of activity.  A guy was at the railing in a speedo right in our line of vision.  My friend, in her broad East Texas accent says, "oh, my, he's not circumcised."

[kmachete14]

Women aren't visual is such BS. I'm sure a lot of men secretly love ogling women and evaluating their features . . . and maybe that leads to impure thoughts about what's under their clothes. But that can happen when someone is wearing ANYTHING. 

Is there really that much of a stumbling block difference between thong bikinis and regular bikini bottoms? It's easy to imagine an extra 4 inches of skin! 

To be honest, I think women are more visual in the sense that it doesn't even need to be something "revealing" or x-rated to stimulate the visual cues . . . think about all the times you notice a man with their cuffs rolled up and catch a glimpse of gasp -- their forearms?? Or when they stretch and you see their belly button hair or V- cut?? Or if they just smile and you see a dimple and strong jawline?? Or you notice a muscle bulging out of a pajama t-shirt?? Or their work slacks hang just the right way ?? Or they run their hands through their hair? Or they lift something very heavy? Or bounce a baby on their knee? Or they yawn and their adams apple bobs "Sexily"?? 

I feel disgusted typing all that out and yet it's mostly totally innocent!! And yet when I see those things on my man I get way too excited! 

 

[Hane]

@klein_roeschen, Ex-Mr.-Hane-#1 once said to me, “I don’t know where you keep the silverware!” We had been living in that apartment for three years.

[klein_roeschen]

1 hour ago, Sarah92 said:

This gave me a good laugh! Please do continue this saga. Men need to learn somehow lol. 
 

Lori mentioned in the feminist ruined gentlemen post that the boys she dated were gentleman. But didn’t some of the guys she went out with want sex? And didn’t a boy touch her inappropriately in class or something? Which is awful but illustrates these guys weren’t necessarily the angelic gentleman that she portrays. 

Dear gentlemen, after we mastered the beginners guide to make yourself a pb&j sandwich, we will go this time a step further. But first, I'm proud of you that you finished the first guide and not only opened the door and stepped into the kitchen, this room full of wonders of food and didn't let your overwelming fear rule you, but also opened the door to the new and wonderfull world of food preparation for you.

In this guide you will not only learn to cut yourself a piece of bread, but also to make yourself a ham and cheese sandwich. Sometimes you need something more substancial than pb&j, so here comes the ham and the cheese, delicious, nutrious and filling until your wife will return from her ungodly job to prepare you a warm meal.

1. Hopefully you remembered where you found the plate and a knife, because you will need it everytime you want a sandwich. If not, you need to look again for it and hopefully will this time memorize where your wife stores them.
2. Now you need to go to the fridge to get the ham, cheese and a spread like butter or mayonaise. Please ignore the plastic canisters filled with stuff you vaguely reminds you of yesterdays dinner, we are here to learn to make a sandwich and not how to warm up leftovers. Take your ingredients out.
3. Now is time to make the sandwich, but you hit the snag of finding that this time, your bread doesn't comes pre- sliced and you need to slice yourself to pieces. Don't fret, it's easier to slice bread than wood. You need to look for the large knife that looks like a saw and use it. Aim for half an inch thick or smaller slices and don't be discouraged when your pieces don't look good, beauty in bread slicing comes with experience.
4. Now we spread a small amount of butter or mayonaise on the bread and put 1 or 2 slices of ham on it and the same amount of cheese. When your cheese slices comes in a plastic wrap, please unwrap it, the wrap is hard to bite throw. Put the second slice with the spreaded site down on top of that.
Congratulations dear gentlemen for achieving to make yourself a ham and cheese sandwich, I'm proud of you and take a beer out of the magical fridge to go down with your sandwich. And give one to me, I need it.

And the next time I will teach you how to warm up the leftovers you found in your fridge using a microwave. But for now, enjoy your sandwich dear gentlemen

Thank you @kmachete14 for the immodest toughts after reading your discription. Now I need to change my panties.

@Hane let me guess, one of the reasons he become ex#1?

Edited May 12, 2020 by klein_roeschen
reed the replies to late

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

@kmachete14  Oh dear you've invaded my thoughts.

How about a man in just right fitting old Levis, a white button down shirt open at the neck with sleeves rolled to expose just enough of the forearm, wearing either cowboy boots or loafers/ no socks.

Oh my (gasp, pant, pearl clutch, lip bite). I feel faint.  I must sit down while I contemplate the vision before me. 

Oh dang he just smiled and ran his hand through his hair.

I'm dead.

[Loveday]

34 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

@kmachete14  Oh dear you've invaded my thoughts.

How about a man in just right fitting old Levis, a white button down shirt open at the neck with sleeves rolled to expose just enough of the forearm, wearing either cowboy boots or loafers/ no socks.

Oh my (gasp, pant, pearl clutch, lip bite). I feel faint.  I must sit down while I contemplate the vision before me. 

Oh dang he just smiled and ran his hand through his hair.

I'm dead.

I need a fan. Whew.

[Seahorse Wrangler]

1 hour ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

@kmachete14  Oh dear you've invaded my thoughts.

How about a man in just right fitting old Levis, a white button down shirt open at the neck with sleeves rolled to expose just enough of the forearm, wearing either cowboy boots or loafers/ no socks.

Oh my (gasp, pant, pearl clutch, lip bite). I feel faint.  I must sit down while I contemplate the vision before me. 

Oh dang he just smiled and ran his hand through his hair.

I'm dead.

I'm sure I down-loaded a picture of either Tom Hiddleston or Chris Hemsworth dressed like that in the past.

Just for reference purposes, of course.

[feministxtian]

Y'all need to stop...ok? I'm over here dying...

[hollyfeller]

8 hours ago, Hane said:

@klein_roeschen, Ex-Mr.-Hane-#1 once said to me, “I don’t know where you keep the silverware!” We had been living in that apartment for three years.

After I divorced my ex he called me one day, accusing me of taking all of the wooden spoons when I moved out.  He just didn't know what drawer they were in.  So he decided being nasty to me was preferable to searching.  SMH

BREAKING NEWS: Lori doubles down on being an idiot

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Well .....she's always admitted she didn't learn anything in school.

[delphinium65]

1 hour ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Well .....she's always admitted she didn't learn anything in school.

We believe her, she doesn't need to keep proving it every day!   

[cindyluvs24]

On 5/12/2020 at 8:37 AM, SongRed7 said:

I live in NJ and go to the beach frequently. I've seen dudes in speedos who shouldn't be wearing them...but who the heck cares? I just don't look at them. None of my business.  Problem solved. 

 

(waves to fellow Jerseygirl)   Lori should go to Fifth Avenue Beach in Asbury. She'd lose what's left of her tiny little mind.

[wallysmommy]

Heathen Jezebel that I am, my bff and I put together a rolling storage cart for my papercraft supplies.  I decided screwing by hand was too hard (no lube, more than 10 minutes -- I'll go to the prayer closet now), so I went and bought an electric screwdriver.  Not a man in sight except two four-legged boys and they weren't much help.  Lori would be whimpering that she needs a man to build something because it's "man's work."  Idiot that she is.  

[klein_roeschen]

32 minutes ago, wallysmommy said:

Heathen Jezebel that I am, my bff and I put together a rolling storage cart for my papercraft supplies.  I decided screwing by hand was too hard (no lube, more than 10 minutes -- I'll go to the prayer closet now), so I went and bought an electric screwdriver.  Not a man in sight except two four-legged boys and they weren't much help.  Lori would be whimpering that she needs a man to build something because it's "man's work."  Idiot that she is.  

If nothing bad happened I will get a new kitchen in september. Since my budget is severly limited, it will be a kitchenette from Ikea. I did the measuring of my kitchenspace and searched and looked around for the best offer, which lead me to Ikea. Looked for a freestanding stove and a small freestanding dishwasher and found one at a different shop. Looked for the measurements and will need a seperate countertop than what will come with the kitchenette and calculated the whole cost of everything and how much I have to save each month. No man involved, only me working jezebel. And come september, I will assamble the counters and cabinets to reduce the need for help. Will only need help with installing the stove and dishwasher, cut the countertop and hang up the cabinets.

[IrishCarrie]

Can I just say that I’m particularly enjoying Alyssa’s latest Instagram post?

Spoiler

 

Not because it represents her strength and beauty (although it does) but mainly because she’s wearing leggings, showing her lady parts and MUST know it’s like giving two fingers to her judgemental, mean spirited mother ?????

[Loveday]

 

 

I don't think my husband has ever felt the need to 'correct' me. I guess that means my husband is negligent.

Some guy named Brian:

Quote

"If you are unwilling to correct your wife, you will be a negligent husband of a sickly family. Don't marry."

Lori:

Quote

How willing are you to be corrected by your husband? Do you accept it willingly or do you fight against it? He knows you better than anyone else, therefore, he sees your faults better than anyone else.

Why do I suddenly get visions of husbands using a 'rod of correction' on their wives? 

And the comments have started coming:

Quote

I feel bad when I give him cause to need to correct/scold me

 Scold?? What is she, a little child? 

Our buddy Adam Walker poses a question. I'm not sure exactly what he means by this, though:

Quote

Lori, what sanctions do you believe a husband is allowed to use?

In every other relationship where authority is asserted (government, parents, church) there is an expectation that non-compliance can and rightly should lead to sanction, albeit with limits.

If none, then can it really be said that a husband has authority on his own, if he must appeal to a different authority in order to uphold his own?

 

[Pammy]

Adam Walker wants to know, "Yes or no: can a husband do anything to punish his wife for not complying with his wishes? Hint: you have to say 'yes' to his freedom of punishment because, if not, it means you don't actually believe in the authority of husbands. Because asserting authority is exactly the same thing as punishing people. So: gotcha. Now I get to spend some time imagining scenarios involving manly men and willful wives. Sweet."

[Sarah92]

How to win a husband over without any words told in diary form. 

Dear Diary, Day 1

A man on the internet said I couldn’t really correct my husband if I wasn’t remaining submissive, that I should win him over with a smile and godly spirit. My husband has a terrible habit of never helping with the children and leaving dirt and garbage everywhere. This is very stressful for me but I will try to not correct him and will win him over. I will begin tomorrow. I look forward to the happiness my submission with bring. 
 

Dear Diary, Day 15

I’m not sure this winning him over works. He continues to leave his stuff laying about and spends even less time with the children. I’m exhausted. I do everything with a smile so as to make the home happy and win him over. I don’t want to be a nagging wife. He has noticed my smile, forced as it was, while cleaning his skid marked underwear and commented that I must love cleaning to smile so much. So as to not correct him, I smiled more and nodded. I would like to write more but the littlest one is screaming and my darling husband is looking annoyed that I haven’t attended to little Jimmy’s screams. I’m tempted to ask him to do it but as my Sweetheart has told me, I’m far better at nurturing. 
 

Dear Diary Day 300

I have to say this submission, not correcting your husband works very well. Our home is now at peace . The children and I are very blessed. Until a week ago my husband continued to throw his laundry all over and ignore Jimmy and Sally. Our savings were also running out because of his taste for whiskey. The skid marks continued as I’m not sure he knew how to wipe his own ass. But a miracle happened! We were upstairs and I was picking up his dirty socks and smelly towels. He was well into the whiskey and was demanding dinner. As he was going downstairs he turned once more to demand 10 mins and some lube following dinner when he slipped on a missed sock and fell down the stairs. I had seen it of course and knew he was going to step on it; however, I simply didn’t want to correct him because that would not be submissive. After all, the head of the house knows best where to step when going down stairs. The funeral was two days ago but the house has been very quiet and lovely. The life insurance that I took out a month ago will surely tide us over. We are blessed. 

 

[saintmom]

On 5/10/2020 at 1:58 AM, hollyfeller said:

I went back and red Ken's ridiculous comments.  My favorite was where he asked a women how she would feel if men started wearing thongs and "ruining the beach for them."  Uh, we'd just look away?  It's that simple, Ken, you dolt!  Men have necks - swivel that head another direction!

Oh I've seen some shirtless men at the beach who made me want to stab my eyes out, so there's that.  And no, I did not vault myself at them.  Shocking! And like others, I just don't stare because, well, that's rude.

 

Edited May 14, 2020 by saintmom

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Who is this Simon Speckles -- Lori's last adoring fanboy leghumper? 

He need to STFU right now.  Doesn't he have a job or something he should be doing?  How does he have all day every day to write reams and reams of drivel comments on her FB?

I clicked on his avatar and saw the Confederate flag,  clicked off immediately, and used  a gallon of brain bleach to erase the memory. Not going back in even with the rescue ferrets. 

[louisa05]

35 minutes ago, saintmom said:

Oh I've seen some shirtless men at the beach who made me want to stab my eyes out, so there's that.  And no, I did not vault myself at them.  Shocking! And like others, I just don't stare because, well, that's rude.

 

We have a neighbor who is constantly in his yard with no shirt.  Let’s just say he’s in the “ put a shirt on! No one wants to see that!” category. But you know, we just don’t continue to look in that direction. 

From today’s comments: This is all going to lead to killing Christians! It’s so obvious and logical, isn’t it? 
 

 

 

Spoiler

 

Edited May 14, 2020 by louisa05

[hollyfeller]

48 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Who is this Simon Speckles -- Lori's last adoring fanboy leghumper? 

He need to STFU right now.  Doesn't he have a job or something he should be doing?  How does he have all day every day to write reams and reams of drivel comments on her FB?

I clicked on his avatar and saw the Confederate flag,  clicked off immediately, and used  a gallon of brain bleach to erase the memory. Not going back in even with the rescue ferrets. 

I have observed that Lori often has vigorous leghumpers who appear one day and take over, but then disappear in fairly short order.  I'm pretty sure they are secondary accounts from a few of her adoring fans.

[Loveday]

Simon Speckels reminds me of that old Styx song, 'Too Much Time On My Hands.' 

He replies on almost every. single. comment. Morning, noon, and night. That Lori allows him to do this, knowing as she must that he's got a Confederate flag in his profile pic, says as much about her as it does about him. 

[feministxtian]

That tripping on a sock thing cracked me up! I loved it. 

That whole submission thing is so messed up. There ain't no way I'd try that "win him without a word" bullshit. There would be words, lots of words, profane words, loud words, probably ending with a door slam. I'd bet serious cash that Lori never used that "win him without a word" bullshit...

[Alisamer]

7 minutes ago, feministxtian said:

That tripping on a sock thing cracked me up! I loved it. 

That whole submission thing is so messed up. There ain't no way I'd try that "win him without a word" bullshit. There would be words, lots of words, profane words, loud words, probably ending with a door slam. I'd bet serious cash that Lori never used that "win him without a word" bullshit...

I think Lori may have tried the "keep him from filing for divorce by shutting the hell up and being submissive" method, but eventually settled on the "guilt him into staying by throwing religion in his face" method combined with the "California is a community property state" method.