Mills Family 6: Livestreaming Dinner Because That Is Totally Normal

[MangoTango]

OK, so this isn’t specific to the Mills, but it’s still related.

 

Something that really bothers me about Tom not liking his daughters to be opinionated, to think critically (despite his claims of teaching it to ALL of his kids), not be able to have a career outside of what he considers “women’s work”, etc., is that this makes these girls vulnerable to being taking advantage of both mentally, physically, and financially. Not that they would have their own money, cause, you know, they’re women.

 

I just hope the girls know that they have autonomy over their bodies and minds, despite what their parents may or may not have taught them.

Edited March 26, 2020 by MangoTango
grammar!

[Daisybear85]

So he drives around to 4 stores all with signs posting 2 bag limit on flour, with none to be found... finally finds some at local store and buys 8 bags?? I guess considering 90% of his children’s diet comes from bleached white flour he feels entitled to it! If this man had integrity he would have taken his 2 bags and informed the store about the limits and had them post a sign too. The man is out every.single.day, he does not need to shop for an entire month like his weird shut-in, anxiety ridden wife did! 

[mollysmom]

1 hour ago, Daisybear85 said:

The man is out every.single.day, he does not need to shop for an entire month like his weird shut-in, anxiety ridden wife did! 

I have never heard Andrea described so perfectly. This is spot on. 

[Nikedagain?]

On 3/23/2020 at 5:14 PM, Itsjustme said:

About that Park Live. SO much that bothered me and made me sad. I have always felt bad for the way Claudia is treated. She is four. She still is little and she is trying so hard to get attention becasue she is stuck between Hannah the baby, and Sophia Daddy's favorite. I honestly think she misbehaves sometimes becasue for her SOME attention is better than NO attention from the daddy she adores, after all mommy isn't there for comfort anymore. I guess I'll start at the beginning.

The kids are all unloading from the van. Solly is visibly upset and sad.  (i guess he wanted to go to the other park) He doesn't want his coat but I guess he wanted Tom to hold it for him. Tom said "I'm not holding it for you either you wear it or put it in the van" "Do you want me to help you put it there? They proceed to put the jacket in the van.

Tom shows one of the Little Libraries that is there. Those are made by regular people to hold books for free. The idea is people put books there after they have read them to pass on to others. so you can take books to read, or donate some, or both. The door was broken off on one side and tom said "aw, I should fix that".Claudia bounded over and said "Daddy can I get a book?" Tom replied "No, you don't need a book right now!" 

Claudia and Sophia were on the big slide. Apparently Claudia was holding Sophia's jacket so she couldn't go down the slide. Of course Sophia cried becasue that is what she has learned,  that all she has to do to get Daddy to comfort her and get mad at Claudia is to cry and run to him. Tom says "What's wrong baby girl?" Sophia replies "Claudia held my coat" Then he says in a harsh tone "Why were you doing that Claudia?" Claudia replies that she didn't and tom SAYS "Haha lies, so many lies". Maybe she did hold her coat or maybe she didn't but Tom will always take Sophia's word. He shames Claudia constantly and it makes me sick!!! She is FOUR! That is what little children do. 

Later he sees Claudia without her shoes on and says "Claudia are you running without shoes?" You're going to get a sticker!" (I guess they get demerit stickers when they do something wrong)   BUT Sophia had her shoes off too and he didn't say anything like that to her, he just said get your shoes on.  Claudia said something was pinching her and Tom Said "well, that's what happens when you take your shoes off". 

Now everyone is climbing on the jungle gym, it's the round type that you can go under and over. Judah was climbing it. Sophia was climbing it and Tom bellows with pride "good job Fia, look at you!" "You're so brave!" "Good Job"  "Do you want Daddy to get you down? He proceeds to life her off and gets her down. meanwhile the whole time Claudi was saying "Dad watch what I can do" "Daddy look!" He ignored her.

Then Sophia runs over and Tom tells her how good she did and says "You look so cute with your two front teeth missing, show everyone, smile" 

Then he gushes about Hannah going up the slide, "None of my kids has ever done that at that age, she is so brave." Claudia in the background  "Hey Dad, I can do it too" He doesn't pay attention.

Also Claudia was distressed that Solly was throwing dirt on her shoes and Tom says "You're fine!". What happened to the same response he gave Sophia when she was upset that Claudia pulled her jacket? 

Then they all played on the merry go round and Tom says to everyone "When is the last time any of you have been on a merry go round?" "Most of them don't exist anymore in the U.S." (I'm destroyed that you have one of the very few merry go rounds and we all are so deprived of such joy) 

Love your children all the same. You should have no favorite and you especially shouldn't say it or blatantly show it in front of the other kids. It's hurtful and mean!! They want you to love them, just love them and spend time with them, teaching them things and sitting and eating with them, feeding them if you have to, that creates bonds. Stop being such a man-child hanging out with your boys playing video games and start giving attention to the little ones. That's what they want most from you, your attention!   Chastising your four year old and telling her she lies is disgusting. Four year olds lie, they want a lot of attention, they will fight or push siblings out of jealousy, but it's YOU who eggs on that jealousy by playing favorites. Shame on you

So sorry for the rant but I cannot stand to see a so called adult man being bothered by the actions of a four year old and then actually  laugh at her and call her a liar. His immaturity is unbelievable. He's like a fifteen year old.

Oh and in the beginning of the video he also said that 53 degrees is his favorite temperature! 

Demerits are also used in the military: 

The purpose of the Demerit System is to provide the Battalion with a means of maintaining good order and discipline and tracking progress of midshipmen within the Battalion. 

I wasn't so far off when I compared Tom to the Father of the seven children on The Sound of Music. They were being treated like they were in the military, they are kids!!!!That's  what his home is like, punching time cards, getting demerits for bad behavior, he actually told a four year old she would get a sticker!!!! 

He infuriates me! 

 

Only thing I can picture right now....

 

[brotherhusbandsgalore]

Pardon my french, but HOLY SHIT! ANDREA DIED?!?!?!

I think I've been gone from FJ for a year and a half (had my first baby, and suddenly no time for internet gossip, lol). Now that I'm home all day I thought I'd catch up on some of my favorite sagas, and the first thing I learn is that Andrea died?? I guess I shouldn't be too surprised, because obviously having so many children without ever having prenatal care is a huge risk, but I guess I assumed they would stumble ass backwards into good luck like so many medically negligent fundies manage to.

I'm going back in time through the threads, and I've only read some of the most recent ones so far, but I can say I'm completely unsurprised that Tom is being so negligent to his poor kids. Baby Hannah with her bare feet in winter is making me cry- I just want her to be clean and cozy, dammit! Poor Eden is even more ignored than before I wish I could be Mary Poppins to these kids, they're all going feral at a time when they need good hygiene, good nutrition and  most importantly- love and support!

I have a LOT to catch up on, but I will start off what are sure to be many, MANY posts in this thread by patting myself on the back for being in the OG Tom haters club

  

On 9/28/2018 at 1:01 PM, brotherhusbandsgalore said:

Every video I watch convinces me more that he's a selfish, piggish manchild who does nothing for his own kids. I wish I had the patience to really dig in to these vlogs and get more insight on what makes him tick.

I'm more disgusted at Tom than ever, his children have only one parent, and he is already eating his way to a heat attack, but now there's a pandemic against which our only weapons are education and meticulous hygiene- two areas Tom will never be competent in.

Edited March 26, 2020 by brotherhusbandsgalore

[can'tstopwatching]

Tom is so clearly starting to panic, and panic-shop, over this virus (or at least the circumstances the virus is causing -- I'm sure he still doesn't believe the severity of the actual virus) while trying to cover it up by laughing at others who are doing the exact same and insisting he's not one of them.

[Pleiades_06]

29 minutes ago, brotherhusbandsgalore said:

I guess I shouldn't be too surprised, because obviously having so many children without ever having prenatal care is a huge risk,

Welcome back to FJ!

I agree with you but did you see she died of inoperable cancer-it probably wouldn’t have helped much if she had been diagnosed beforehand. Unfortunately that fact could be used by some of her audience to promote more scary “doctors are bad” propaganda. 
 

[brotherhusbandsgalore]

6 minutes ago, Pleiades_06 said:

Welcome back to FJ!

I agree with you but did you see she died of inoperable cancer-it probably wouldn’t have helped much if she had been diagnosed beforehand. Unfortunately that fact could be used by some of her audience to promote more scary “doctors are bad” propaganda. 
 

Oh no, I haven't gotten that far yet (I had to take a quick detour to check on the J-Rod thread).

Is the general consensus that her cancer being "inoperable" is the truth, or just a narrative they're pushing to be able to say that preventative care would have made no difference?

I promise to limit my questions, I don't want to bore you guys by going over stuff everyone else already knows. Instead of going backwards, I'll find my way directly to thread #1 so I can start with the most important info first. I'm sure with Tom running the show that the previous year has been various repetitions of Eden learning to cook and clean for 10 while Tom locks himself in his office with the arcade machine and his beloved takeout enchiladas.

[Pleiades_06]

17 minutes ago, brotherhusbandsgalore said:

Oh no, I haven't gotten that far yet (I had to take a quick detour to check on the J-Rod thread).

Is the general consensus that her cancer being "inoperable" is the truth, or just a narrative they're pushing to be able to say that preventative care would have made no difference?

I promise to limit my questions, I don't want to bore you guys by going over stuff everyone else already knows. Instead of going backwards, I'll find my way directly to thread #1 so I can start with the most important info first. I'm sure with Tom running the show that the previous year has been various repetitions of Eden learning to cook and clean for 10 while Tom locks himself in his office with the arcade machine and his beloved takeout enchiladas.

Those are really good questions considering who Andrea was. It seems like it was a very rare form of breast cancer that metastasized into her liver and other organs. Her mom died of lung cancer that followed a similar path. It seems to be genetic. 
Tom is trying to win at YouTube while the kids take over the house and childcare. In other words he’s a loser 

[Smitty]

I think he meant a sticker in her foot.

[Smitty]

Why do his followers and this site believe one word of His made up explanation?

if you notice, Dr. Tom has not shown anyone the explanation on her death certificate.  He has pushed at every opportunity that the doctors got it wrong on Andrea’s mother by their diagnosis death by lung cancer.  The proximity from lungs to breast does not make it breast cancer.

He took that and made Andrea’s liver cancer into inflammatory breast cancer so that he could indicate that it was hereditary instead of tied to their terrible health care decisions over all those years.  They played Russian Roulette a few too many times.

Think of that bloody mattress he proudly tells about all the time - yikes! 
They tried to model their life after some religious sect and brainwashed themselves to believe all their own nonsense.  
Which one of those boys will try to model that life will be the question.  God save them.

 

[Pleiades_06]

2 hours ago, Smitty said:

Why do his followers and this site believe one word of His made up explanation?

Her health was discussed extensively months ago and I think most people agreed there was no reason not to believe Tom or to blame her for having cancer. Some cancer survivors popped in and emphasized how unfair it is to judge people on what health care decisions they make while fighting cancer. The sad truth is that sometimes people die-including people in my own family-of cancer and there is nothing to be done. 

We will never really know about her condition because it’s none of our goddamn business. Tom’s an ass but he doesn’t owe anyone a death certificate viewing. What is our business is how she promoted fringe ideas about healthcare that naive people may buy into. That alone is enough to snark about. 

[can'tstopwatching]

7 hours ago, Pleiades_06 said:

Her health was discussed extensively months ago and I think most people agreed there was no reason not to believe Tom or to blame her for having cancer. Some cancer survivors popped in and emphasized how unfair it is to judge people on what health care decisions they make while fighting cancer. The sad truth is that sometimes people die-including people in my own family-of cancer and there is nothing to be done. 

We will never really know about her condition because it’s none of our goddamn business. Tom’s an ass but he doesn’t owe anyone a death certificate viewing. What is our business is how she promoted fringe ideas about healthcare that naive people may buy into. That alone is enough to snark about. 

I agree with this, but the parts mentioned above about how Tom thinks he knows what type of cancer it was in both Andrea and her mom somehow better than the doctors who diagnosed them really shows his arrogance and dangerous ignorance of the medical profession. He really truly believes he knows better than them, just because mother and daughter both died of some kind of cancer. And the kids hear him say those things and the older boys have shown they are following in his ways of thinking which really sucks.

[Pleiades_06]

50 minutes ago, can'tstopwatching said:

I agree with this, but the parts mentioned above about how Tom thinks he knows what type of cancer it was in both Andrea and her mom somehow better than the doctors who diagnosed them really shows his arrogance and dangerous ignorance of the medical profession. He really truly believes he knows better than them, just because mother and daughter both died of some kind of cancer. And the kids hear him say those things and the older boys have shown they are following in his ways of thinking which really sucks.

When did he say that? Can you link the video? All I remember seeing was the explanation he reported from the doctor and his intention to have his girls tested for the gene

[jozina]

(Doctor who is seriously regretting my career choice): I don't think inflammatory breast cancer as much of an immediate death sentence as some have said on here.  It depends on the stage but the 5 year survival overall with treatment around 40%.  Tom's showing his lack of medical knowledge with the breast/lung cancer nonsense - tumours which have metastasised to the lungs generally show up in a different way to primary tumours.

He's such an arrogant piece of rubbish. Mocking everyone else for panic buying when he's doing exactly that!

[formergothardite]

38 minutes ago, jozina said:

Tom's showing his lack of medical knowledge with the breast/lung cancer nonsense - tumours which have metastasised to the lungs generally show up in a different way to primary tumours.

I have always wondered how accurate Andrea's(and then Tom's) accounts of the medical advice they were given were. It seems like whenever Andrea was ever seen, doctors were very concerned about how unhealthy she was and so she automatically rejected everything they were telling her. She was very, very invested in believing she knew better than medical personnel. 

Andrea once let one of her children suffer with RSV to the point of needing hospitalization and she completely maintained that the doctors were lying and the baby wasn't really that sick despite being unable to nurse for a weekend. She twisted everything to fit in with the narrative that doctors are always wrong and she knew better. 

It is really hard to tell what the reality of her cancer was because these two were never accurate narrators of the truth. She was obviously very sick for a long time. 

[brotherhusbandsgalore]

10 hours ago, Pleiades_06 said:

We will never really know about her condition because it’s none of our goddamn business. 

I can understand if you feel my question was distasteful- but I also don't really think this is a fair critique to level on what is essentially a gossip site. 99% of this site is dedicated to discussing things that are "none of our business."

When someone decides to broadcast every minutiae of their lives on social media, they are the ones opening up the conversation for all of their viewers. 

Also, I think it's actually pretty important to discuss if someone is using their platform to publicize views that are provably harmful- like using essential oils in lieu of medicine or skipping prenatal care.

If Andrea's life is a cautionary tale, I think people may benefit from knowing that her videos weren't an accurate representation of the consequences of her actions. I understand that we may never know one way or the other, but it made my spidey sense tingle to hear she just so happened to die of an untreatable cancer that no one would have ever known about anyway. That outcome is just so damn convenient I wondered if FJers saw good reason to doubt their story.

Edit: Just for the record, I'm not asking for a rehash of the health discussions you mentioned, Pleaides. (I understand how frustrating it is to have a newb drop in and reignite old arguments that then go on for pages and pages.) I'm reading my way through the threads bit by bit, so I promise I'll catch up on all the debates that have happened. I was just curious to know if there was some consensus that could be easily summarized

Edited March 27, 2020 by brotherhusbandsgalore

[WhatAlife]

The cancer could have possibly been treatable. At the very least her life could have been extended with treatment. I believe that it became untreatable at some point due to their ongoing  medical negligence and constant ignoring of symptoms. 
 

[Pleiades_06]

1 hour ago, brotherhusbandsgalore said:

I can understand if you feel my question was distasteful- but I also don't really think this is a fair critique to level on what is essentially a gossip site. 99% of this site is dedicated to discussing things that are "none of our business."

When someone decides to broadcast every minutiae of their lives on social media, they are the ones opening up the conversation for all of their viewers. 

Also, I think it's actually pretty important to discuss if someone is using their platform to publicize views that are provably harmful- like using essential oils in lieu of medicine or skipping prenatal care.

If Andrea's life is a cautionary tale, I think people may benefit from knowing that her videos weren't an accurate representation of the consequences of her actions. I understand that we may never know one way or the other, but it made my spidey sense tingle to hear she just so happened to die of an untreatable cancer that no one would have ever known about anyway. That outcome is just so damn convenient I wondered if FJers saw good reason to doubt their story.

Edit: Just for the record, I'm not asking for a rehash of the health discussions you mentioned, Pleaides. (I understand how frustrating it is to have a newb drop in and reignite old arguments that then go on for pages and pages.) I'm reading my way through the threads bit by bit, so I promise I'll catch up on all the debates that have happened. I was just curious to know if there was some consensus that could be easily summarized

Your questions are completely appropriate.

I also think it’s appropriate to discuss how Tom and Andrea ignored health issues. I’m just careful at leveling accusations at a cancer victim and her family when we really don’t know-and never will know-what happened.

[Tekas_76]

12 hours ago, Pleiades_06 said:

What is our business is how she promoted fringe ideas about healthcare that naive people may buy into. That alone is enough to snark about. 

Well, at a certain point she talked about the estrogen cream that she was using for becoming more fertile. I asked her how she was using it and if she would recommend a brand. She answered that in one of the videos, how to use, the brand she was using, etc. I never bought it, I was afraid. In the meanwhile, after her death I found out that taking uncontrolled estrogen supplements can make the cancer cells multiply like crazy, because you can put too much by mistake. Or if you already have a few cells going bad, that will accelerate everything. 

My mother also told me that one of her friends died for that reasons, for abusing estrogen supplements.  Her process was long and painful,  she lost all her hair due to treatments and she knew that she was going to die. She prepared everything for after her death...

So, the advice given by Andrea was with good intentions but could have resulted in a messy painful deathly situation for me. People should leave the health advices for the doctors, they studied for years and they know it better...

[Itsjustme]

Inflammatory breast cancer is very aggressive and there really is no cure rate, just a 5 year survival rate that is very low.  It's not involving a lump like regular breast cancer but there are signs and symptoms that occur. The breasts themselves can turn red, itchy, pitting, orange peel look to the skin, etc. It happens mostly in women under 40, and also can be more prevalent in women who are obese. The reason for this is becasue fat cells make estrogen, and estrogen can make hormone-receptor-positive breast cancers develop and grow. Also progesterone, which she was taking, can cause breast cancer. I'm certain she was aware of this but thought it was just myth. She followed a lot of doctors who had unconventional ways of doing things, reading their books and self medicating.

Absolutely not her fault that this happened but she was definitely playing with fire and maybe had she been willing to listen to mainstream doctors more, she might have been aware of what to look for, how to care  for her body better, and not to try to take care of things herself.

As for Tom saying he thought her mother had the same becasue she had lung cancer, and he thought it was breast cancer that traveled, is again just them thinking they know it all. If the doctors said her mother had lung cancer, then it was lung cancer. They would have said it was breast cancer that traveled if that's what it was. 

 

[Mom2Bubby]

Tom is live right now going to different stores trying to find groceries. So many idiots on there commenting how this virus is basically a joke. Pisses me off. They are so far up toms conspiracy theorist ass I just can’t watch anymore. And he’s driving and reading comments again! Ergh!  

[MangoTango]

I agree with a lot of people on Andrea’s approach to health and it has got me to thinking.

All of this talk about Andrea and loading up on estrogen and progesterone so she could have as many kids as possible has led me to speculate about why Tom burned the crib. I wonder is he subconscious (or the doctors told him) that her irresponsible use/abuse of these hormones is what caused or contributed to her cancer and death. He could have just donated the crib to good will, though then again, that would go against his belief of taking charity/contributing to it.

In the beginning of the live today, Tom was talking about how salt isn’t bad for you because you need it to absorb water into your body. He goes on to say that we don’t get enough salt into our diets. Apparently, Andrea also added a teaspoon of salt into her drinking water...well, there’s that.

Before he goes into Walmart, he says, “I hope I don’t get stopped by the Walmart police telling me to stop filming.” He proceeds to grab a cart in the sun because “the sun kills corona virus real fast.” OK, then, Tom.

Edited March 27, 2020 by MangoTango
typo

[Tekas_76]

9 minutes ago, MangoTango said:

the Walmart police

But wasn't the Walmart manager a good friend of Tom? ???

[Smitty]

There are those who will give up their concern for their own family members rather than to admit their long standing beliefs are wrong where and when it most counts.  

When my mother, father, sister, and husband each passed away I beat myself up out of concern for whether I was as open eyed an advocate as I needed to be on their behalf.  
I apologize if mentioning a death certificate seemed too much.  I only did so because the discussion provoked the memory that my husband’s stated cause of death(kidney cancer) confirmed a tragic circumstance in his case.

So I’ve been there, as have many of you old enough to see family slip away.  Death is seldom wrapped up in a perfect little ball unless old age is a factor.

Its Tom’s few go-to proclamations that grind on me; we all know what they are right down to salt, sugar, hygiene, whatever.  
I will say the man is impressive in his knowledge of The Bible whether or not one agrees with every interpretation.  
Again, sorry for offending some by my choice of words.