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Sierra 4: She Speaks More Spanish than the Vuolos and Dillards


HerNameIsBuffy

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Scrabblemaster

Grocery shopping became stressful for me. I loved to shop groceries, but during the last couple of months I was always in a bad mood afterwards. There is a wall of text under the spoiler, I had no intention to write that much. Only read it, if you want to. 

Spoiler

It started when one shop rearranged their aisles. The are now arranged like a snail's house...they even presented maps at the entry!11!! I mean come on, if you need a MAP for your customers to find their ways in your store...you should have made it less difficult. It is the store where we can find special things that we don't need every day. But it is too  expensive to buy our basic groceries.

Normally I bought most of our things at ALDI,  but I wanted to reduce our plastic and I got lazy and wanted to shop everything in one store.

Which brought me to store nr3. They have more variety in fruits and vegetables but the staff is not very polite and on more than one occasion the cashier forgot to scan the coupon or the reduced price for items. Going back to interrupt them after I realized it, was,well, not that great.  Aaand they have a butcher's shop inside where we started to buy our meat. But their staff is horrible. Nearly every time we went there they were impolite or rude. I understand if they are stressed during stressful times in the evening hours or on Saturdays, but they were pretty much rude no matter when we were there. Last time we were there I cried when we were at home and I promised that I would never go back to them. I talked with different people about my experience to check if I was the problem, but they told me about similar occasions. (I had a rough year 2019 and I wanted to check if I got too sensible or if I am a difficult customer (when I ordered 100g ham the lady was pissed and snapped at me how many slices I wanted, I answered 100g I don't know and she said again 'how many slices' and I panicked and said 12. I mean it should be her job to know this or just weigh the ham until there are 100g.) . I'm sorry for this rant I don't know how I got there but now I feel better. 

I want my good grocery-shopping-mood back. I need a fresh start. 

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Eternalbluepearl

I don't like shopping and I avoid stores when possible. I have never been in a Costco and dislike all the stereotyping about women being obsessed with coffee, wine, and "Target runs" (I don't do any of the above.) I grocery shop at one store. When I need other things, I order online. 

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Eternalbluepearl

I have a weird observation to make and the Sierra thread seems like a good place for it. Do you guys ever look at someone like who this thread is about and wonder to yourselves...what is it actually like to be a fundie? Don't they ever stop and say to themselves "this is all such bullshit?" "This feels wrong?" Etc. I mean...Trump? Honestly? The gun worship? The war worship? The hating of other people and cultures? The obsession with artificial gender roles. The distrust of education? All the fundy culture makes my head spin, my heart ache and my brain explode. How do they stand it? How do they feel happy and comfortable? It baffles me. I could not be an inelligent woman who loves my family and teach them those ugly ideas. Sorry for the rant. 

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PurpleCats

@Eternalbluepearl I was just thinking the same thing last night.  My thoughts as I cooked dinner for my partner and I (we are unmarried and have been ‘livin in sin’ for several years now, the horror) we’re along the lines of... would they be surprised at how happy and content I am?  I have no headship to please, no screaming hordes of children I can’t afford, and no religious obligations.  The thought of living their lives is anxiety inducing for me.  I can’t imagine none of those women don’t ever look out at non fundies and think... huh. 

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I think there are people who enjoy having a “reason” to look down on others  and judge them and the fundie platform plays right into that. They want to feel holier than us. But, the less than holier crowd (like many of us) are not envious for the things they think we are lacking (I’m cool not living in subjection to my husband and having more kids than I can feed). Joke’s on them. 

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uber frau

I think that's true but there's also an element of,  "well this sucks.   It'd better be bloody worth it."

The delayed gratification/everything will be worth it in heaven clause in Christianity keeps people putting up with an awful lot of shit that they wouldn't do otherwise.  And if you throw in the flip side of the coin that tells you you're going to the hot place for even thinking that you might be better off doing things differently,  it's a fairly potent reinforcer.

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Pecansforeveryone

Fear of hell was what kept me in religion for a couple of years after I stopped believing in God. They also may not know other coping mechanisms and ways of staying moderate and sober other than being fundy. They really do think we are just living from one drug-fueled orgy to the next. 

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allthegoodnamesrgone
10 hours ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I have a weird observation to make and the Sierra thread seems like a good place for it. Do you guys ever look at someone like who this thread is about and wonder to yourselves...what is it actually like to be a fundie? Don't they ever stop and say to themselves "this is all such bullshit?" "This feels wrong?" Etc. I mean...Trump? Honestly? The gun worship? The war worship? The hating of other people and cultures? The obsession with artificial gender roles. The distrust of education? All the fundy culture makes my head spin, my heart ache and my brain explode. How do they stand it? How do they feel happy and comfortable? It baffles me. I could not be an inelligent woman who loves my family and teach them those ugly ideas. Sorry for the rant. 

I've asked an actual fundy this question. It all boils down to the poor murdered fetuses. 🙄 It is really hard to get real answers because they get very defensive when you ask what about, babies losing their healthcare, or babies not having access to food, or babies in cages. That boils down to, it isn't THEIR responsibility that is their parents then they very angry and it pretty much shuts down any conversation the harder you press. There is also that deep seeded it isn't real it is just the "liberal" media pickin on him. All the fundies/fundy light people I know don't watch the news and what little they get comes from Fox and religious sources that get their news from Fox so they have no real idea what is going on and they don't want to have any idea what is going on. 

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SassyPants
11 hours ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I have a weird observation to make and the Sierra thread seems like a good place for it. Do you guys ever look at someone like who this thread is about and wonder to yourselves...what is it actually like to be a fundie? Don't they ever stop and say to themselves "this is all such bullshit?" "This feels wrong?" Etc. I mean...Trump? Honestly? The gun worship? The war worship? The hating of other people and cultures? The obsession with artificial gender roles. The distrust of education? All the fundy culture makes my head spin, my heart ache and my brain explode. How do they stand it? How do they feel happy and comfortable? It baffles me. I could not be an inelligent woman who loves my family and teach them those ugly ideas. Sorry for the rant. 

They are “Jesus take the wheel” folks. They follow the canned rhetoric of whatever cult leader they follow. For many it takes the thinking, decision making and fear out of life. Leader says have a billion kids, even if you have no money or are sick, forbids education for your kids, live in isolation, refuse to work for others, vote for Trump...they fall in line and do so. All of this also makes the LEADER and not one’s self responsible when the shit hits the fan.

Many would say these folks are faithful. I’d say that far too many are simple.

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Shouldabeenacowboy

I am a huge fan of our local Trader Joe's - great products, reasonable prices, they give mama a free coffee and the man-cub a couple animal crackers. I love food and grocery shopping, I like reading about ingredients, seeing what new items they have, etc. My son enjoys learning about the foods and "checking" the grocery list (I used to use a grocery list app, but his joy in holding the paper...!) and the final bill. For me it's really a nice errand. @Eternalbluepearl I didn't know there was a stereotype about "women obsessed with coffee, wine, and "Target runs"" - I guess I am the stereotype, hehehe, as I am very particular about my coffee and wine, and like Target's usefulness when I need random stuff and can get it all at one store. 

My husband on the other hand dreads the grocery store. But you could say he's obsessed with coffee and wine ;) 

I am also a fan of Costco but I go as soon as they open or just before they close, as I am turning into a grumpy old lady at heart and have no patience for people :text-lol:

Edited by Shouldabeenacowboy
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SassyPants
5 minutes ago, Shouldabeenacowboy said:

I am a huge fan of our local Trader Joe's - great products, reasonable prices, they give mama a free coffee and the man-cub a couple animal crackers. I love food and grocery shopping, I like reading about ingredients, seeing what new items they have, etc. My son enjoys learning about the foods and "checking" the grocery list (I used to use a grocery list app, but his joy in holding the paper...!) and the final bill. For me it's really a nice errand. @Eternalbluepearl I didn't know there was a stereotype about "women obsessed with coffee, wine, and "Target runs"" - I guess I am the stereotype, hehehe, as I am very particular about my coffee and wine, and like Target's usefulness when I need random stuff and can get it all at one store. 

My husband on the other hand dreads the grocery store. But you could say he's obsessed with coffee and wine ;) 

I am also a fan of Costco but I go as soon as they open or just before they close, as I am turning into a grumpy old lady at heart and have no patience for people :text-lol:

Love Trader’s, but only on weekday mornings at 8:30 ( retired life!). My complaint with grocery shopping isn’t the actual shopping/store, it’s the crowds and parking lots. Since I’m no longer raising a family, my go to store is my local independent. It is very pricey and certainly would not be an option if I was feeding a family.

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allthegoodnamesrgone
1 hour ago, Shouldabeenacowboy said:

I am a huge fan of our local Trader Joe's - great products, reasonable prices, they give mama a free coffee and the man-cub a couple animal crackers. I love food and grocery shopping, I like reading about ingredients, seeing what new items they have, etc. My son enjoys learning about the foods and "checking" the grocery list (I used to use a grocery list app, but his joy in holding the paper...!) and the final bill. For me it's really a nice errand. @Eternalbluepearl I didn't know there was a stereotype about "women obsessed with coffee, wine, and "Target runs"" - I guess I am the stereotype, hehehe, as I am very particular about my coffee and wine, and like Target's usefulness when I need random stuff and can get it all at one store. 

My husband on the other hand dreads the grocery store. But you could say he's obsessed with coffee and wine ;) 

I am also a fan of Costco but I go as soon as they open or just before they close, as I am turning into a grumpy old lady at heart and have no patience for people :text-lol:

I can't tell you how many times I've noped right the hell out of Costco, just by driving past the parking lot. We only have ONE in the Des Moines Metro area, the next closest is about 45 miles away it is so stupid. I don't care what I need from there I refuse to fight that crowd. I miss having weekdays off to do stuff like this, I to hate people in large crowds, and most people would just as soon run you over as smile at you on a Saturday afternoon in Costco. 

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neuroticcat

I think many people opt into fundie lifestyle or other rigid cultures because of the security it offers about doing things the “right way,” whatever that is. 

It also removes responsibility/risk from decisions because something was God’s will or costly.

My theory is that most adult converts to fundie life  come from chaotic or even abusive backgrounds and want the authority and structure...the kids born into it, on the other hand, are just indoctrinated 

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GuineaPigCourtship
3 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

They really do think we are just living from one drug-fueled orgy to the next. 

So, um, is this not what we're doing now?  Asking for a friend.

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lizzybee

When we lived in Birmingham there was just the one Costco and it was pretty much always a nightmare with crowds. We would buy our baby formula there to save $$ (Kirklands brand is a big money saver even with the price of a membership included) and many many a time my husband would drop me off at the door, I’d dash in, grab the container, pay, and dash right out because we didn’t feel like doing the whole thing with the kids in tow. 
 

Now we do Sam’s Club because it’s free (FIL shares his membership with us) and even though I miss Costco’s cheese pizza, I don’t miss how wildly busy they always were. 

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HereticHick

Yes, Sierra, making custom tshirts to wear to the movies is a totally rational thing to do with your husband's paycheck.🙄

 

 

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Snarkasarus Rex

Are Mark's parents well-off?  Cuz Sierra's parents are only slightly older than I am (!!) and are still working to fund their own lives.  The way they spend money baffles me...they have to be getting help.

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grandmadugger

I hate y’all. I just got sucked into her cooking show. She uses ghee in green beans. Ghee?!?! That is expensive!! And served those bougie green beans with with hot dogs and boxed mac & cheese. Lord ham mercury. 

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HereticHick
7 hours ago, grandmadugger said:

 And served those bougie green beans with with hot dogs and boxed mac & cheese. Lord ham mercury. 

I love you so much for using "bougie" in a sentence. That is all.

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allthegoodnamesrgone

Knowing Sierra, she makes her own Ghee, it is time consuming but doesn't sound like it is hard to do.

 

Didn't she buy a t shirt press a couple years ago? This is so something she would do, but I'm not sure if I'm dreaming that or it really happened. 

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On 2/24/2020 at 5:55 PM, GuineaPigCourtship said:

So, um, is this not what we're doing now?  Asking for a friend.

God there go my plans for the next month😅ill need to take up a new hobby- maybe cross-stitch??

Edited by byzant
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catlady
3 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Didn't she buy a t shirt press a couple years ago? This is so something she would do, but I'm not sure if I'm dreaming that or it really happened. 

assuming this is true:  dare I ask *why* she would buy that?

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Seculardaisy

There was literally no creativity put into those shirts. Mark’s literally just says “Sonic The Hedgehog.” I am deceased.

When I was in middle school my friend and I made tshirts for a concert with puffy paint that had more thought put into them looked better than this, and that’s saying something because our puffy paint shirts were actually pretty fugly.

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HereComesTreble
On 2/24/2020 at 3:02 AM, PurpleCats said:

@Eternalbluepearl I was just thinking the same thing last night.  My thoughts as I cooked dinner for my partner and I (we are unmarried and have been ‘livin in sin’ for several years now, the horror) we’re along the lines of... would they be surprised at how happy and content I am?  I have no headship to please, no screaming hordes of children I can’t afford, and no religious obligations.  The thought of living their lives is anxiety inducing for me.  I can’t imagine none of those women don’t ever look out at non fundies and think... huh. 

You make a good point.  I’m sure that “ah ha” moment happened for many former fundies.  

For the remaining fundies, I think it’s a frog in boiling water scenario.  They are immersed in fundie life from the very beginning or they’ve converted and they’re love bombed with this new, holy life.  As they grow up Fundie, they are accepting of the wacky stuff because it’s all they know and it feels comfortable.

side note: in reality, a frog will try and escape when water starts to boil.  

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59 minutes ago, Seculardaisy said:

When I was in middle school my friend and I made tshirts for a concert with puffy paint that had more thought put into them looked better than this, and that’s saying something because our puffy paint shirts were actually pretty fugly.

Hahaha, that reminded me of seventh grade. School was having a talent show and my best friend and I decorated t-shirts to go with the dance routine we made up to “Stayin Alive” by the Bee Gees. They were plain, white Hanes men’s undershirts. We decorated with glue and glitter (no such thing as puff paints, fabric paints, or glitter glue in 1978!) with the name we made up for our 2-person dance troupe: Starbright. 

You pretty much can’t get more 70s than that. 😂

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