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Maxwell 35: Choosing The Right Vest For an Extended Family Member


Coconut Flan

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3 hours ago, Tatar-tot said:

I think her local doctors want her to have conventional surgery and this is the low cost alternative otherwise why on earth are they going out of town?  There are tons of oncologists in the Kansas City/Leavenworth area.  It will be a miracle if she survives. 

I just had dinner with my daughter who is an oncology nurse. I gave her the summary of what we’ve learned about Anna. She was very concerned. I won’t try to sum up everything she said but she did think the doctors she works with would have recommended much different treatment plans. 

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Simon's newborn pics are up.  I fucking hate the caption "Christopher Maxwell children"  Poor Sarah give Amish Anna credit, she birthed them!  Prissy Chris only supplied the sperm.

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@SPHASH and Anna carried them!

As the late, great black feminist attorney Flo Kennedy said

Quote

If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.

 

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16 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Simon's newborn pics are up.  I fucking hate the caption "Christopher Maxwell children"  Poor Sarah give Amish Anna credit, she birthed them!  Prissy Chris only supplied the sperm.

and it's grammatically incorrect.  I know it's just a caption, and captions can be incomplete sentences, but--

"The Christopher Maxwell children"

"Christopher Maxwell's children" 

Yes to everything @SPHASH and @PennySycamore said about the patriarchal bullshit of that label, so on top of that:  everyone in that damn family except for Gigi has the *same last name* and they call it the Maxwell Family Blog.  Are their readers really so stupid that they need to be reminded that Christopher's last name is Maxwell?  Sheesh, Sarah, just say "Anna and Christopher's children" and show yourself to be the writer you claim to be.

 

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Mediocre photography. 

Good thing no one paid her for those pictures. 

She may be one of the family's photographers but her photography skills are as good as her writing skills. 

 

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Trite, over done poses.  They're fine for family photos, but that's it.

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7 hours ago, SPHASH said:

Simon's newborn pics are up.  I fucking hate the caption "Christopher Maxwell children"  Poor Sarah give Amish Anna credit, she birthed them!  Prissy Chris only supplied the sperm.

I think it's a throwback to a bygone era when families were known by the husband's name ("the Christopher Maxwell family") and wives had no identity of their own (Anna would have been known as "Mrs. Christopher Maxwell.") Jennie Chancey and her cronies used to identify themselves as "Mr. Husbandsfirstname Lastname" a lot. IDK if they still do.

By the way, all that patriarchy really screws with your genealogy research a century or two later. Because the women ended up with literally no identifying information because they were just extensions of their husbands. They married as soon as they were of age and immediately they stopped having a first name or maiden name, at least as far as any official records went.

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Do the Maxwells do purity rings for their daughters? I noticed a ring on Sarah’s right hand, and also noticed it in the random life post, but can’t see one on Anna or Mary. It could just be a nice piece of jewellery that Sarah was given as a present, but I wondered.

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Dear lard. The photo of Anna & SP is captioned, “Mama and Baby.”

The one of Chris & SP: “Christopher and Simon Peter.”

2020 AD (or CE) and mothers are incidental. Fathers count and gave names. 

And did anyone else notice the clear statement that Steve’s God is not about closing anybody's womb: The growing Christopher Maxwell Family. (We will have more!)

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24 minutes ago, MamaJunebug said:

And did anyone else notice the clear statement that Steve’s God is not about closing anybody's womb: The growing Christopher Maxwell Family. (We will have more!)

I did.  I didn’t (and still don’t) know what to think of it.  Do they fully expect to have more later? Or is Sarah butchering the written word again?

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10 minutes ago, catlady said:

I did.  I didn’t (and still don’t) know what to think of it.  Do they fully expect to have more later? Or is Sarah butchering the written word again?

Point taken.  I’m gonna go with “(C)” — both of the above. 

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12 hours ago, Bethy said:

I think it's a throwback to a bygone era when families were known by the husband's name ("the Christopher Maxwell family") and wives had no identity of their own (Anna would have been known as "Mrs. Christopher Maxwell.") Jennie Chancey and her cronies used to identify themselves as "Mr. Husbandsfirstname Lastname" a lot. IDK if they still do.

 

I could be wrong, but I think “Mrs. Herfirstname Hislastname” traditionally referred to a divorced woman.(I know it wasn’t mentioned, just throwing it out there.)

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In my area Mrs husband'sfirstname husband'slastname meant the husband was alive. Mrs. herfirstname husband'slastname meant the husband had died.  Not sure what this might mean elsewhere or now.

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Divorced women were referred to as Mrs Her Maiden Name  His Last Name:  Martha Stewart would be according to that  custom Mrs. Kostyra Stewart as het maiden name was  Martha Kostyra.

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On 2/13/2020 at 8:45 AM, fundiefan said:

For all the speculation and "what if" and why's and everything else we are asking / saying / guessing...I hope for only one thing. That Anna has made the choices for her life that are best for her LIFE, not for her way of life or religion or husband or future reproduction. 

Anna making choices for her own healthcare based on her own sense of self preservation. 

Unfortunately, we know the world she inhabits and the people she is surrounded by and the way she was raised - so that begs a million questions. We know she is not autonomous. If I, for example, were in her situation, I'd just have my breasts cut off and be done with it. I wouldn't mess around with trying to save them or anything else. I am not that attached. I know others are, and they would make their own decisions based on their own sense of self preservation, etc. Others would choose to go completely different routes. 

Anna, however, lives in a world where she is not the one to make most of the decisions about her own life. And many that she thinks she makes were programmed into her head long ago, so she didn't really choose, she just does what she's been programmed to believe. 

I refuse to ever call her Anna Marie or even NR Anna anymore. She is an individual, and whether she gets to live as one or not, I won't compound it. She is not who she is in relation to anyone else - she is Anna. And I hope beyond hope that she has been given the space, time, confidence & support to choose her own treatment and her own path. 

 

I love this too. I'm having a hard time with this thread. My annual "are you ready for the hysterectomy?" conversation is due in a couple weeks.

The answer is truthfully, "yes. Yes I am. I'm over the shenanigans that are required to get my allotted monthly narcotic prescription. I'm pretty sure a baby will not happen. I want to have the operation before my ob/gyn decides to leave his practice. I don't want cancer. Take it all out."

Pretty sure I'm going to get the annual mammogram talking to as I'm now 40. I have to say, losing my boobs would be crazy harder. They are vanity for me. I have a large tattoo in between.

Not that I wouldn't choose to live first.

All this to say that I can't choose to take on another preventative medical procedure.

Unless, since I'm unemployed, I quit my COBRA earlier than intended, go to Medicaid and attempt to do the operation whilst looking for a job.

It shouldn't be this complicated.

I hope Anna is making choices for herself. I too feel like this is an area where the Maxwells skew less assholish and I'm going to choose to believe that's a good thing.

 

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I adore the photo of Simon Peter with his frowny face. He looks like he is saying 'What is all this shit?' Hahaha. 

Why, for the love of something, why, are the little girls dressed the same but the boys aren't? I get colour schemes and what not for photos but I HATE with a fiery passion children dressed the same. 

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On 2/14/2020 at 3:48 PM, fundiefan said:

Mediocre photography. 

Good thing no one paid her for those pictures. 

She may be one of the family's photographers but her photography skills are as good as her writing skills. 

 

Be fair.  Sarah's mediocre photos are almost always better than Christopher's dead baby and doom laden wedding photos.

@MamaJunebug

I dunno.  The Maxwells are so f'ing stupid on many levels but are also medically compliant on others.  Hypocritically so.  They preach what they do not practice.

I'd throw a complete shit-fit if the Maxwells rejected doctor recommended radiation therapy post laser ablation for Anna M on the grounds that it might have an effect on her fertility.

Yeah, I wouldn't put it past them.  But I'm also hoping that Anna has made the right decision for her life and existing progeny with the laser ablation.  I don't think she needs to produce any more little Maxwell sprogs.  FFS!

Time will tell. 

With breast cancer (or any cancer) it is always something of a crap shoot.  Even for the Maxwells.  You hope that you will make the best decisions you can with the information available.  But bad things can still happen.  Even when you pray your brains out.

Edited by Palimpsest
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On 2/13/2020 at 11:58 AM, Lady Grass Lake said:

This caught my eye, and I Googled Knitted Knockers and found the www.knittedknockers.org and you can download  a free  pattern.  Plus it recommends specific types of yarn.  Website said they can be worn without pain quickly after surgery where silicone ones can't be worn for weeks afterward.  I think it's wonderful idea, but I can picture a group of church ladies all gathered together in a church basement frantically knitting away and laughing madly, and someone coming in asking "What are you all doing in here?"   Imagine the surprise when they all hold up their Knockers.  I love it.  

My IRL story is very like this. I work at a hospital and I was knitting at an all-staff meeting at work one day and the CEO and VP were running the meeting from a podium up front. They were warming up the crowd and the CEO noticed me and he started joking with the VP that I must be knitting him a hat.  She starts insisting that I'm knitting something for her instead and they have a mock argument about it until she finally asks what I'm making. I held up my knitting and announced that I was making a knitted knocker for the cancer center, but that the CEO could have a pair if he really wanted. The CEO turned bright red and the VP started laughing uncontrollably, as did the crowd.  The CEO had to put his head on the podium for quite a while before he could compose himself. 

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I detest the babies wrapped in cheesecloth thing. The babies just always look so weird and terrible, like a big toe wrapped in a bandage, even when the baby themself looks fine. Also the picture with the parents wedding rings - I couldn’t figure out why the rings were in a bottle cap when they don’t drink until I zoomed in and saw that no, it’s just two very different looking rings placed weird.

 

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Surgery is just one step of breast cancer treatment. Usually, though not always,  it's part of a care plan that includes chemo, radiation and/or herceptin and/or hormonal therapy.  It all depends on the type, size and even location of the tumor, and other factors. 

In my case, I had the lumpectomy. Easiest recovery ever-- it's outpatient and I was carrying my 2-year that  evening and at work the next day.

Chemo was harder but manageable.  During chemo my genetic tests came back and so I got to have a double mastectomy.  That was also hard but manageable,  and then they took out my ovaries and tubes because the beasts cancer gene also causes ovarian cancer.  The good news is,  testing  positive doesn't affect the treatment or recurrence rate of  the original cancer--it just means there's a lot of additional preventive surgeries.

Given Anna's age, I'm sure she's had genetic testing. Hopefully,  she's negative,  because I really question whether they'd let her do what needs to be done to reduce the  risk of future cancers. Because babies do require ovaries to get started. 

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It's interesting that there have been so many social conventions surrounding identifying a woman's marital status. while no such thing has existed for men. Born John Smith, die John Smith. The historical importance of marriage for women as shown by these naming practices is clear. I hope that has changed. I'm attached to my "maiden" name. It's who I am. 

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