Maxwell 35: Choosing The Right Vest For an Extended Family Member

[Dandruff]

Per the Maxwell's blog, Anna Marie should be in surgery now.

Hope her kids are being reasonably distracted from the anxiety.

[louannems]

My sister is really into woo medicine. She is now anti-vacs and thank goodness all her (vaccinated) kids are adults. She is in her fifties and refuses mammography because of the radiation.  Nevermind she gets lots of radiation flying all over the world all of the time.  So instead of mammograms, she gets thermography, which is done in spas, not a medical facility, and has a high rate of false-negatives and false-positives. 

[Melissa1977]

13 minutes ago, Dandruff said:

Hope her kids are being reasonably distracted from the anxiety

They'll be forced to pray all the time. Is mom ill? You have to pray. Is mom MORE ill? Pray harder. Plus I doubt Maxwells are able to explain things adequately. I'm worry especially for Joshua and Ruthanne, who can be aware of a lot of information but not being allowed to have questions.

At least Anna and Mary are sweet and relatively fun. So at least the children have a couple real caring people next to them. (Don't take me wrong. I'm sure Teri loves these kids and her heart suffers for them, but she can't handle stress).

[Hane]

@louannems, a close friend of mine is turning to woo at the age of 67.  She’s taking a reiki class that sounds sketchy AF, as it’s all about crystals and essential oils. She recently posted a testimonial that stated three people were able to avoid knee replacements by using essential oils. She believes that underwire bras cause breast cancer and rose quartz is too “strong” to place on a child’s skin. 
Worst of all, she’s decided that if she ever gets breast cancer, she’ll refuse all conventional medical care. Her reasoning is that breast cancers are “overtreated.” A friend of ours went through two bouts of breast cancer and then skin cancer, and now is suffering greatly from rheumatoid arthritis as a result of one of her treatments. This is why Woo Friend has decided All Chemo Bad. I hope to God she hasn’t said this to any breast cancer patients or survivors.

All of this is tiring me TF out. (She also “can’t deal with all the Trump hate.”) I am sitting here, just having made a doctor’s appointment for the discomfort I’m feeling in my right breast (I’ll be seeing him tomorrow). It hurts so badly to see that a dear friend has turned into a freaking whackjob.

[PennySycamore]

The teeny bit of radiation you get from mammography is much less than the radiation you might have if you actually get breast cancer.  And if you do have a cancer discovered during your mammogram.  it's likely to be smaller, easier to treat, and to require less radiation.

ETA:  @Hane, here's hoping that your appointment tomorrow turns out A-OK with nothing seriously wrong.

Edited February 18, 2020 by PennySycamore

[HerNameIsBuffy]

6 hours ago, danvillebelle said:

One of the great things about menopause is you just don't give a shit any more."  He laughed loudly and said that wasn't the first time he'd heard that.

:::small voice::: when does this kick in?  I've been fighting the peri-menopause for a few years now and I still give a shit.

1 hour ago, Melissa1977 said:

I'm sure Teri loves these kids and her heart suffers for them, but she can't handle stress

I agree with the latter, but I've never gotten the impression Teri loves any of them.  The way she discusses her family is as if they are all one giant obligation.  If she were Catholic they'd be her penance.

[OhNoNike]

2 hours ago, Dandruff said:

Per the Maxwell's blog, Anna Marie should be in surgery now.

Hope her kids are being reasonably distracted from the anxiety.

I have to say that the photo they posted of her this morning was one of the best I’ve seen. I love her hair not up in that hairstyle. 

Also they posted an update on the blog post. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

I wonder how much they told the kids?

When I was a kid my dad had a massive stroke and everyone knew but me for quite some time.  It's wrong, but sometimes people think they mean well by shielding kids instead of sharing age appropriate information with them.

She looks beautiful and Idk if it was intentional, but I love that they posted a pic of her alone.  Not with kids as a mom, not with Christopher as a wife.  Just Anna, a woman in her own right.

[Giraffe]

The ofChris kids are so young they may only know “mommy’s sick and needs a doctor.” Some of Melanie’s kids (who’s her husband?) are old enough to be told what’s going on and may feel afraid. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

2 minutes ago, Giraffe said:

The ofChris kids are so young they may only know “mommy’s sick and needs a doctor.” Some of Melanie’s kids (who’s her husband?) are old enough to be told what’s going on and may feel afraid. 

Nathan is Melanie's husband.  

Even without knowing specifics they will feel the tension...I hope the kids are handling it well and suitably distracted.  

I'm no fan of Christopher, he was my gateway Maxwell, but he looked torn up in the recent pics and I hope he puts all that concern toward making things easier for Anna.

An aside, but I had no idea how much he looked like Teri until he was under this stress.

[IsmeWeatherwax]

That's a beautiful picture of Anna, she always looks radiant! It looks to me as if her hair has been cut?

 

[fundiewatch]

Terri confirmed in the comments that she did have a haircut. She looks lovely. 

[meee]

Good. The haircut proves that she's not among those Christians who believes "super long hair no matter what." It looks like she got quite a bit cut off, and I'm hoping that is a good sign and means she's preparing for chemo; I know a lot of people preemptively get haircuts before chemo. (Sorry - I feel like that sentence is written in Sarah-Maxwell-ese, and the only excuse I can offer is fatigue.)

[PennySycamore]

@meee, shorter hair would almost certainly be easier for Anna to care for even if she doesn't lose some of it.  And if she does lose some of her hair, having it cut shorter might make it easier to face a bald head.

[keepsweet]

Does anybody know if she actually had a biopsy somewhere along the way? All I've read is about her having surgery. A biopsy could have been done easily while she was still pregnant without sedation or anything. 

I know there was talk that the one doctor was 99% certain, but still you think a biopsy would have been done. 

[Giraffe]

15 minutes ago, keepsweet said:

Does anybody know if she actually had a biopsy somewhere along the way? All I've read is about her having surgery. A biopsy could have been done easily while she was still pregnant without sedation or anything. 

I know there was talk that the one doctor was 99% certain, but still you think a biopsy would have been done. 

They were vague about the specific tests. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Sarah says it went well.

Teri says she’s already back in the hotel and she will be home Friday or Saturday. 

[anjulibai]

I'm glad the surgery went well and I hope she has an easy recovery. 

Today is Ruthanne's 6th birthday. Poor thing - I hope they do something special for her today and they aren't making her spend her timing praying for her mama. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

7 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Teri says she’s already back in the hotel and she will be home Friday or Saturday. 

How painful is this surgery, typically?  I've had surgery twice and both times was supposed to be outpatient and both times I wasn't released for 4 days so this is startling (in a good way) she was released so fast.

I hope Christopher prepared with a pot to make tea, light things she might be able to keep down, etc.  I can't imagine trying to recover in a hotel room and having to call room service whenever I wanted tea and toast or such.

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

How painful is this surgery, typically?  I've had surgery twice and both times was supposed to be outpatient and both times I wasn't released for 4 days so this is startling (in a good way) she was released so fast.

I hope Christopher prepared with a pot to make tea, light things she might be able to keep down, etc.  I can't imagine trying to recover in a hotel room and having to call room service whenever I wanted tea and toast or such.

Teri says laser surgery is supposed to be a less painful recovery. I would probably prefer a hotel to a hospital room. Only because they wake me up so much during the night to check my BP and other stuff that I can’t sleep.

BTW I’m not a hospital hater. I just have a hard time sleeping in them. Every little noise or person wakes me.

Edited February 18, 2020 by JermajestyDuggar

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Just now, JermajestyDuggar said:

Teri says laser surgery is supposed to be a less painful recovery. I would probably prefer a hotel to a hospital room. Only because they wake me up so much during the night to check my BP and other stuff that I can’t sleep.

Totally agree hotel > hospital.  When my son was hospitalized for a week he was so annoyed by the beeping all night long, for a while he'd flinch when the microwave or oven timer went off.

I just remember recovering from surgery and the only things that mattered to me was bathroom, tea, ice water, pain meds...and the odd couple bites of cinnamon toast to keep the pain meds down.

 

[Odd1Out]

I’m sure the hotel is way more comfortable for recovering than a hospital, and a ton cheaper too. It’s possible they got one with a kitchenette so Chris can make her some good when she’s up to it. 
and I have no doubt that Anna and Mary are doing something for Ruthanne’s birthday. 

[PennySycamore]

2 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

How painful is this surgery, typically?  I've had surgery twice and both times was supposed to be outpatient and both times I wasn't released for 4 days so this is startling (in a good way) she was released so fast.

I hope Christopher prepared with a pot to make tea, light things she might be able to keep down, etc.  I can't imagine trying to recover in a hotel room and having to call room service whenever I wanted tea and toast or such.

When my  oldest daughter had her brain surgery at Duke,  she was released to a nearby Hilton the next day to recover.  This Hilton has an arrangement with Duke Medical Center so that patients who are doing well and are stable can recover at the hotel.  Either my m-i-l or f-i-l had the same arrangement and stayed at that Hilton after their surgery which was not brain surgery. 

(I think my daughter spent the night after her surgery in neuro intensive care, but it's possible that she was released to the hotel that day. )

[OhNoNike]

2 hours ago, Odd1Out said:

I’m sure the hotel is way more comfortable for recovering than a hospital, and a ton cheaper too. It’s possible they got one with a kitchenette so Chris can make her some good when she’s up to it. 
and I have no doubt that Anna and Mary are doing something for Ruthanne’s birthday. 

It’s also probably healthier.  When my mom had her hip replaced a few years ago, it was one night and they didn’t even want her a rehab place because of the risk of hospital infection. 

[Bethy]

5 hours ago, meee said:

Good. The haircut proves that she's not among those Christians who believes "super long hair no matter what." It looks like she got quite a bit cut off, and I'm hoping that is a good sign and means she's preparing for chemo; I know a lot of people preemptively get haircuts before chemo. (Sorry - I feel like that sentence is written in Sarah-Maxwell-ese, and the only excuse I can offer is fatigue.)

Anna's haircut - and the timing of it, since she's never been one to lop off her hair right after a birth like some moms do - is one of the most encouraging signs I've seen as far as her treatment taking a responsible turn. What she has now is still "long" but, if chemo is on the horizon and hair loss is inevitable, will be much less of a mess to deal with.

I think you and I are trying to say the same things here - that the haircut may mean further medical treatment is in the offing. I don't wish chemo and all its side effects on anyone, but more than that I don't wish negligent medical care on anyone. If chemo is needed to keep her alive and healthy and fight the filthy beast that is cancer, I hope that's what she'll be getting.