Seewalds 43: Pants may Have Been Worn Or Not

[medimus]

Only one baby had colic (in Jessa's memory). Michele had lots of endurance. Dad would help out. She never used fatigue as an excuse for being grumpy. Always 'by god's grace'

THey hosted bible study once a week and ran a 'church bus' to bring people to church.

She wouldn't allow the children to tease eachother and if they were talking about others wrong choiches she encouraged them to pray for them.

She customised curriculum for each child if neceassary. Sometimes they went for morning (as soon as burger king opened) tutoring sessions with tater tots. (this seems a horrible way to start the day to me).

Michelle taught Jessa how to cut hair, first buzz cuts on the boys and then with scissors. The older girls loved it apparently. Becuase it was like a live baby doll (also choosing outfits and feeding babies) 'Who needs fake baby dolls when you have the real ones'

Michele enjoyed her kids, the younger years, each season. When jed and jer were born, she had a box of puzzles for all the other children to do while she fed the twins. TO keep the children close.

Michele encouraged individual strengths and didn't compare them to eachother.

Jessa is thankful for Michelle's example, reaching out to other moms. Michelle is an example of a titus 2 woman.

MInistry does not have to wait. Disciplship is letting other moms see the fights and the mess.

If the children questioned something, Michelle would point to GOd's word and not say, because I said so. And she encouraged them to look at god's word themselves and coming to their own convictions.

'You can never do enough good to earn salvation. Through faith alone, not good works' Lots of prayers, lots of reading the bible.

Nothing interesting really.

[Idlewild]

So Jessa is the first Duggar woman to have a job-Jim Bob & Michelle’s PR woman. From those summaries it’s clear Jessa is planning to continue the ‘ministry’ with a few subtle rewrites to address the criticism that she couldn’t possibly devote time to each child. 
Definitely one for the fans...

[Snarkasarus Rex]

1 hour ago, Idlewild said:

So Jessa is the first Duggar woman to have a job-Jim Bob & Michelle’s PR woman. 

Exactly.  This is all rehashed Duggar narrative vs. a heartfelt tribute.  She makes very similar comments during her Mother's Day posts and other posts praising her.  It's all about maintaining the brand.

[HideousGreenShirt]

2 hours ago, medimus said:

She customised curriculum for each child if neceassary. Sometimes they went for morning (as soon as burger king opened) tutoring sessions with tater tots. (this seems a horrible way to start the day to me).

Wait, what? One of her of teaching methods was early morning fast food bribing? 

I guess considering what we know of these children hiding and hoarding food, this might actually have been an effective motivation. Sad. 

[Idlewild]

23 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

Wait, what? One of her of teaching methods was early morning fast food bribing? 

I guess considering what we know of these children hiding and hoarding food, this might actually have been an effective motivation. Sad. 

And the woman who broke down under the weight of her laundry burden was creating curricula, spending time with each child and speaking in a hushed tone to keep everything calm. Yeah, right. 

[medimus]

Yes the morning tater tots tutoring sounds dodgy at best. 

As does the whole 'who needs baby dolls when you have real babies you can play with'

[HerNameIsBuffy]

19 minutes ago, medimus said:

As does the whole 'who needs baby dolls when you have real babies you can play with'

As the youngest in my family who never had real babies I could play with, I distinctly remember tossing my dolls under the bed, leaving them in the yard, down the laundry chute...you can't do any of that with real babies.

And Baby Alive poops didn't smell...same fake food that went in, came out.  

She did not prepare me for motherhood.

[clueliss]

Burger King has tater tots?  

[medimus]

30 minutes ago, clueliss said:

Burger King has tater tots?  

i have no idea

[nvmbr02]

Burger king has mini hash browns in the morning, , similar size to tator tots but flatter. I think they have some sort of cheesy tots now, but those are new in the last few years.

I grew up on fast food and even though I rarely eat it now I clearly pay close attention to ads. 

[JillyO]

5 hours ago, medimus said:

She would take one child at a time to the shop, to chat with them. In the car she would ask getting to know you questions like 'what is your favourite ice cream', 'who is your best friend' etc. She noted this down so she knew this for all the kids and could get them something they liked for their birthdays (to me this is just something surely you know about your children?)

If you have to ask your children these incredibly basic questions during specifically scheduled times and then write their answers down so you don't forget, that's a very clear sign that you have too damn many children.

FFS Jessa, that's not an example of Michelle being a good mom. That's an example of her utter failure as a parent.

[Glasgowghirl]

I don't think these tributes are that heartfelt to be honest, while I don't doubt Jessa loves them both it just seems like she is going through the motions with them both. 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

1 hour ago, Glasgowghirl said:

I don't think these tributes are that heartfelt to be honest, while I don't doubt Jessa loves them both it just seems like she is going through the motions with them both. 

They don't seem genuine because I think they are meant to be Duggar marketing/PR rather than an actual tribute.  

This is where a some real edumacation would have helped them, and they don't need Sinful College (tm) to get it.  They could have found a business-focused homeschool curriculum and/or let the 'Duggar Academy' grads take online business courses from any number of faith-based colleges.  She could have disguised a PR campaign as an actual tribute, and pulled it off, had they put some critical thought into it.  Instead, they rely on repetition of the same old talking points and what they *think* other families think or do, and it falls flat.  You can tell from some of Jessa's statements that they have a pretty warped idea of how non-fundies parent.

[Bad Wolf]

I bet teachers with 20 kids in their classes know more about their students than Michelle knows about her own kids.

[Glasgowghirl]

19 minutes ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

They don't seem genuine because I think they are meant to be Duggar marketing/PR rather than an actual tribute.  

This is where a some real edumacation would have helped them, and they don't need Sinful College (tm) to get it.  They could have found a business-focused homeschool curriculum and/or let the 'Duggar Academy' grads take online business courses from any number of faith-based colleges.  She could have disguised a PR campaign as an actual tribute, and pulled it off, had they put some critical thought into it.  Instead, they rely on repetition of the same old talking points and what they *think* other families think or do, and it falls flat.  You can tell from some of Jessa's statements that they have a pretty warped idea of how non-fundies parent.

Definitely, Jessa was doing it for those purposes and it shows. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

20 minutes ago, Bad Wolf said:

I bet teachers with 20 kids in their classes know more about their students than Michelle knows about her own kids.

I know more about the kids of some FJers than Michelle knows about her own kids.

[Maggie Mae]

I have often (more than once is too much but here I am) wondered how/if Michelle manages to communicate with all the grown kids, the grandkids, and the kids at home. Does she keep a phone log? Is there a chart on the wall that says something like "last time i contacted Jill was 3/23"? Is she doing index cards with important notes like a sales rep? Does she also forget there is a Justin?

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

I don't doubt Michelle & JB started out as caring affectionate parents, until they hit overload & I'm guessing it was the 2 year span where, Josiah, Joy Anna, Jeremiah & Jedediah were born.  Michelle had 4 kids in a 27 month span, FOUR KIDS IN TWENTY SEVEN (27) MONTHS. Not to mention she had 7 older kids on top of that. 

I only had 2 kids in 27 months, and from Feb of 2000 until about August of 2003 it is all a blur. I was a SAHM to TWO children, with a very involved husband, who never failed to wash a dish, change a diaper, or help with laundry, still those 3 1/2 years were a whirl wind, all of us here with more than 1 kid knows what I'm talking about.

[Snarkasarus Rex]

10 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I don't doubt Michelle & JB started out as caring affectionate parents, until they hit overload & I'm guessing it was the 2 year span where, Josiah, Joy Anna, Jeremiah & Jedediah were born. 

Agree.  That's one of the things I've noticed about Jessa's 'tributes'.  Her 'happy childhood' memories are all when Boobchelle actually parented their own kids.  She doesn't talk much about when the older girls had multiple 'buddies', 14 kids were crammed into a small house, she was the homeschool 'headmistress', and the household ran on 'Duggar Time'.  

Edited April 20, 2020 by Snarkasarus Rex

[Melissa1977]

2 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

Agree.  That's one of the things I've noticed about Jessa's 'tributes'.  Her 'happy childhood' memories are all when Boobchelle actually parented their own kids.  She doesn't talk much about when the older girls had multiple 'buddies', 14 kids were crammed into a small house, she was the homeschool 'headmistress', and the household ran on 'Duggar Time'.  

In fact, in the past she talked negatively (or bitter) about having to wake up at nights to feed babies. What of course is something a teenager sister shouldn't be doing!!! In addition, she was obvioulsy a cold "sistermom" and gave no attention to Jordyn. There's an episode where a very young Jordyn is scared at the destist, Jessa does not even touch/hug her and the poor child asks "can I have my mum today? I promise to you that I still cry over that scene. Because the coldness and the loneliness were real!!! 

It was not Jessa's fault. She was young and tired of being a full time free babysitter. But she cannot come now and fake her past, because we all have seen the past. Michelle was absent and Michelle was agressive (the rod, that is true because one of the children told the police about it, and the blanket training, and the Pearls book they endorsed etc). Also when they were living in the little house, the neighbour said that Michelle used to yell the kids. The soft voice is as fake as everything else.

And personalizing curriculums? Oh come on come on. It's very difficult to homeschool a couple kids, and she did excellent with 19? I remember old episodes where the big kids used computer educational programs ALONE (no help from mom and they were very clear about that). 14 kids over 18 years old and not a single accreditation, trade or degree. What a success as a teacher of the tater tot class.

Jessa is smart and knows all of this prefectly. Let me speculate: with Josh the black sheep, Jana single, Jill the black sheep 2, Jinger living far, Josiah the (maybe) black sheep 3, and JD and Joseph so shy, Jessa can become The Good Daughter and receive a lot of help/money AND LOVE from her parents. 

[Queen Of Hearts]

Jessa also has the perfect life from a cult perspective so I am not shocked she is supporting the brand. After all, despite being female she clearly wears the pants in the family so naturally she thinks it is the perfect life. Basically, she gets to be a female version of Jim Bob. 

[dripcurl]

3 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I don't doubt Michelle & JB started out as caring affectionate parents, until they hit overload & I'm guessing it was the 2 year span where, Josiah, Joy Anna, Jeremiah & Jedediah were born.  Michelle had 4 kids in a 27 month span, FOUR KIDS IN TWENTY SEVEN (27) MONTHS. Not to mention she had 7 older kids on top of that. 

I only had 2 kids in 27 months, and from Feb of 2000 until about August of 2003 it is all a blur. I was a SAHM to TWO children, with a very involved husband, who never failed to wash a dish, change a diaper, or help with laundry, still those 3 1/2 years were a whirl wind, all of us here with more than 1 kid knows what I'm talking about.

Wow, I had no idea there was a Duggar cluster of this kind. I feel like that would break anybody. It was always obvious they had a kid about every 18 months, but I didn’t know about those 4 being born like that. I always got the feeling back when I’d watch the show that JB thought all was hunky dory because of Michelle’s cheerleader bod and cheerful countenance, but I think any husband that really loved his wife would get snipped immediately, not only is that 4 kids in such a short amount of time, but they already had 7(!) before. Wow. I guess that Mother of the Year award accompanied by the smooch from the Tool makes it all worth it? My God. And thank you for sharing your story! 

[Lurker]

2 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

 

Jessa is smart and knows all of this prefectly. Let me speculate: with Josh the black sheep, Jana single, Jill the black sheep 2, Jinger living far, Josiah the (maybe) black sheep 3, and JD and Joseph so shy, Jessa can become The Good Daughter and receive a lot of help/money AND LOVE from her parents. 

Yes to this.  Maybe she was motivated by the inclusion of bad daughter Jill in the ladies lunch out and shopping trip, plus  Michelle did a drive by birthday for Israel.   Jessa is reminding JimBob and Michelle that she is the good daughter that is still on brand.   

[EmmieJ]

10 hours ago, JillyO said:

If you have to ask your children these incredibly basic questions during specifically scheduled times and then write their answers down so you don't forget, that's a very clear sign that you have too damn many children.

FFS Jessa, that's not an example of Michelle being a good mom. That's an example of her utter failure as a parent.

I remember my mom always got all of us children special gifts for birthdays and Christmas.  I don't remember her asking us questions to learn about us - she just listened as we talked to her in everyday life and knew us as well as any person can know another.  I believe she found us interesting.  I know I found my son interesting.  I liked listening to him.  I didn't plan specific sessions with him, but because I worked full time, our family time in the evenings and weekends was a priority.  Kids need and crave their parent's love and attention.  If all you can offer is a damn hour each week, just stop having kids.  Just.Stop.

[nst]

Jessa posting a whole thing about her mother is pure pr. She knows the brand and she knows how things look. 

She wants to continue the brand despite the fact that the time is over .....