Gwen Shamblin Lara 11: Cloudy with A Chance of the Holy Spirit

[ManyGoats]

The latest from Life with Gwen and Joe: "Setting New Year's Resolutions"

"Our resolve is to be more like Gwen and Joe!" <awkward laughter>

 

If her goal is to look taller, she blew it with this one. She looks like a munchkin sitting up on that counter.

 

[formergothardite]

2 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

The latest from Life with Gwen and Joe: "Setting New Year's Resolutions"

"Our resolve is to be more like Gwen and Joe!" <awkward laughter>

 

If her goal is to look taller, she blew it with this one. She looks like a munchkin sitting up on that counter.

 

Gwen has all that money and yet she still wears the most hideous clothing. That damn silver bow is just awful. If God is choosing her clothing then he hates Gwen. 

If that guy wants to be like Gwen and Joe they need to start acting like they barely can stand each other. 

[Marmion]

14 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

How many people thought the holes that need to be filled are stomach and heart? (I didn't, I have a dirty mind.)

It does go along with this CCM song I remember hearing .  

So yeah , the idiom isn't original .  Gwen copies not only herself , but also others .   

[Xan]

I found some everyday shoes for Gwen.  

Spoiler

 

[ManyGoats]

 

5 hours ago, formergothardite said:

That damn silver bow is just awful. 

At first I thought you were referring to that thing hiding in her hair.

Edited January 9, 2020 by ManyGoats

[throwaway9988]

Is that some sort of extension/bulker that is falling out and poking through her thin hair

[formergothardite]

11 hours ago, Marmion said:

So yeah , the idiom isn't original .  Gwen copies not only herself , but also others .   

Yeah, I was hearing the "God shaped hole" thing even in IFB churches back in the 80's and 90's.

Not even Gwen's strange, really high hair is original! Jan Crouch was doing that forever ago! 

Gwen just copies people and then she just keeps copying that stuff over and over because she doesn't seem to have any ability to come up with new ideas. 

[Botkinetti]

I think her inability to come up with new things to say is linked with both her lack of nutrients in her diet and complacency.

Her brain must be fuzzy from hunger so she can’t come up with any new ideas and then she realized some time ago she didn’t have to because the money kept rolling in so why even bother.

[formergothardite]

8 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

 

At first I thought you were referring to that thing hiding in her hair.

I can't think of what the heck that can be. Is has to be some sort of thing to hold hair in place. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

It’s so obvious in that still shot that Gwen has had some sort of face lift. Joe isn’t the only one getting work done. I wonder if she will get worse as time goes on. I bet they won’t stop with the plastic surgery until they are 90. 

I want to add I’m not against plastic surgery at all. I would get it in the future if I think it would be worth it. But I think Gwen and Joe are so obsessed with their looks that they will go nuts with the plastic surgery. 

[MayMay1123]

20/20 vision for 2020??? dang, they stole nathan keller's line! how dare they!

[Blue]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I want to add I’m not against plastic surgery at all. I would get it in the future if I think it would be worth it. But I think Gwen and Joe are so obsessed with their looks that they will go nuts with the plastic surgery. 

My problem is that I think she's talked down things like plastic surgery because it's like telling God he messed up when He made you.

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 minutes ago, Blue said:

My problem is that I think she's talked down things like plastic surgery because it's like telling God he messed up when He made you.

Oh really? That’s rich. 

[throwaway9988]

But at the same time, Gwen tells WeighDown participants that God will change their outside appearance to become more beautiful once they starve themselves and make their hearts beautiful. So now that is coming back to bite them in the ass: Gwen looks old and weird, Michael is overweight, Elizabeth is underweight. Should we deduce that their hearts are no longer beautiful? Or maybe they will finally admit it was all bullshit to lure people into their cult from WeighDown? 

Edited January 9, 2020 by throwaway9988

[quiversR4hunting]

33 minutes ago, throwaway9988 said:

But at the same time, Gwen tells WeighDown participants that God will change their outside appearance to become more beautiful once they starve themselves and make their hearts beautiful. So now that is coming back to bite them in the ass: Gwen looks old and weird, Michael is overweight, Elizabeth is underweight. Should we deduce that their hearts are no longer beautiful? Or maybe they will finally admit it was all bullshit to lure people into their cult from WeighDown? 

And this is when I wish "Shallow Hal" could come true and Tony Robbins could make all of RF and CO$, ATI and all other cult members see what is really inside their leaders hearts.

Side note- holy crap, Shallow Hal is 19 years old!

[AmazonGrace]

So far nobody got around to recycling a devotional today so I randomly picked two winners. Gwen is amazed that rain doesn't kill more people but we have to be understanding: Most of Gwen's problems stem from  a crush on her Father.
 

Spoiler

 

When you are in love with God, everything comes alive and no topic can be brought up without appreciation for God. For example, it is raining right now as I am writing and I am praising God for the perfect timing of rain, the genius of rain and asking Him how did He make each drop so perfect and what a great idea to have drops so that His water coming from that altitude would not annihilate each and every person and thing. God has thought of everything. Why does my mind go there…it is because I admire, adore, worship and love God; I have directed my passion to God.

https://gwenshamblinbooks.com/appreciation-for-god/

https://gwenshamblinbooks.com/genuine-deep-love-god/

 

Remember what it looks like to have a crush on someone. I have a crush on the Father, and this is what it looks like: I dress for Him and say, God, do You like this outfit? I get up in the night when I feel He is waking me, or early morning when He calls my name, because I hear the voice of the One I love, even if it is not physically audible. All other voices just fade away. I used to hide chocolate, but now I secure my Bible instead of my chocolate. I look forward to a rendezvous with God. I love reading about God and about Jesus Christ, who saved us and opened the door to heaven. I sing songs to Him all the time. No matter who I’m talking to, He is always on my mind. I can’t take my eyes off Him now.

 

 

[Marmion]

1 hour ago, AmazonGrace said:

Remember what it looks like to have crush on someone. I have a crush on the Father, and this is what it looks like: I dress for Him and say, God, do You like this outfit? I get up in the night when I feel He is waking me, or early morning when He calls my name, because I hear the voice of the One I love, even if it is not physically audible. All other voices just fade away. I used to hide chocolate, but now I secure my Bible instead of my chocolate. I look forward to a rendezvous with God. I love reading about God and about Jesus Christ, who saved us and opened the door to heaven. I sing songs to Him all the time. No matter who I’m talking to, He is always on my mind. I can’t take my eyes off Him now

At first I had wondered if this might fall under the definition of thought control .  http://old.freedomofmind.com/Info/BITE/bitemodel.php#thought  But then I got reminded of yet another CCM song .  

So maybe not , unless American evangelicals are more brainwashed , and from an early age , than one might think . 

Edited January 9, 2020 by Marmion

[CTRLZero]

Quote

the genius of rain and asking Him how did He make each drop so perfect and what a great idea to have drops so that His water coming from that altitude would not annihilate each and every person and thing

Dear God, thank you for not placing ice bergs in the air.  Annihilating rain drops would be a great plot device for a sci-fi book.

Quote

I used to hide chocolate, but now I secure my Bible instead of my chocolate.

See now, I read this as she hides her Bible, which actually makes perfect sense based on her weird devotionals.

[AmazonGrace]

I can't understand how and why Gwen skips daily devotionals, how hard can it be to link something old every day? But there's still nothing up for yesterday. Today we learn the same things we learned exactly a year ago.

 If your doctor told you there is a genetic issue, don't believe them. Gwen knows better:  it's not your genes. Likewise, your cardiologist may have told you that your heart rate changes because of various health issues, but Gwen knows better: it's your religion.  

https://www.freejinger.org/topic/32002-gwen-shamblin-5-she-is-a-shit-writer/?do=findComment&comment=1709111

 

If you're afraid that Weigh Down won't work for you, Gwen knows better: It will, because Gwen says so.

[ManyGoats]

Check out David Martin. He is stylin'! (This is from the current "Life with Gwen and Joe" video.)

Edited January 11, 2020 by ManyGoats

[danvillebelle]

On 1/9/2020 at 12:25 PM, CTRLZero said:

Dear God, thank you for not placing ice bergs in the air.  Annihilating rain drops would be a great plot device for a sci-fi book.

Chubby Rain from Bowfinger!  (If anyone has never seen that movie you must, it's one of the best things Eddie Murphy ever did)

 

[AmazonGrace]

God writes Gwen's devotionals and He has been lazy since He's posted this same bit of  insanity every January at least since 2016 (based on the comments on https://www.gwenshamblinlara.com/im-not-hungry-anymore/)

https://www.freejinger.org/topic/32002-gwen-shamblin-5-she-is-a-shit-writer/?do=findComment&comment=1710125

Today I learned that God must have miraculously fixed my roof  because it is not leaking and my car because it's not broken. He directed traffic because I wasn't stuck in a traffic jam. He picked my clothing so you see it's not my fault that the colors clash... 

Now, if only I could get God to clean the kitchen...

[formergothardite]

6 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

Check out David Martin. He is stylin'! (This is from the current "Life with Gwen and Joe" video.)

I'm confused about a lot of his outfit, but are his feet on blocks? Does RF have exceptionally tall chairs for some reason? That chair looks adjustable, so why not adjust it down if his feet can't touch the ground? 

[ManyGoats]

1 hour ago, formergothardite said:

I'm confused about a lot of his outfit, but are his feet on blocks? Does RF have exceptionally tall chairs for some reason? That chair looks adjustable, so why not adjust it down if his feet can't touch the ground? 

No, that's my fault for not capturing a good image. It's just a reflection on the floor. If you watch for a few seconds from here, you can see it better. 

 

[WeirdHarold]

9 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

Check out David Martin. He is stylin'! (This is from the current "Life with Gwen and Joe" video.)

Was they expectin a flood?