Mrs. Midwest 2: Full of WTF

[Marmion]

@ViolaSebastian  I see .  Really about all that I know about Southern culture , and society , I've learned from books , such as " To Kill a Mockingbird " , and from various television shows , such as " Designing Women " , for instance .  I have never so much as set foot beneath the Mason -Dixon Line , and I rather doubt that Mrs. Midwest , whom was originally from Canada , and now resides in Michigan , has either .  So , in spite of how much country music we all listen to up around these parts , and even how many rebel flags I've seen flying , I don't reckon we Yankees really know what it's like to be from the South after all .   

[ViolaSebastian]

40 minutes ago, Marmion said:

@ViolaSebastian  I see .  Really about all that I know about Southern culture , and society , I've learned from books , such as " To Kill a Mockingbird " , and from various television shows , such as " Designing Women " , for instance .  I have never so much as set foot beneath the Mason -Dixon Line , and I rather doubt that Mrs. Midwest , whom was originally from Canada , and now resides in Michigan , has either .  So , in spite of how much country music we all listen to up around these parts , and even how many rebel flags I've seen flying , I don't reckon we Yankees really know what it's like to be from the South after all .   

It's certainly different than it's portrayed, in my experience. There's definitely an image you project to the outside world which is very, very important. But, well, then there's my beauty queen cousin shooting a handgun off her deck to shut up coyotes while screaming "shut the fuck up!!"

 

[Ozlsn]

On 12/12/2019 at 3:02 PM, Soulhuntress said:

I agree.  She is not in a good place for her life to fall apart.  Family is his.  Friends are his.  And I feel bad for her mom.  Not sure why but mom has to be going out of her mind!

This plus a few other things that have been mentioned make me me really uneasy about this relationship. Caitlin if you are reading this - you should not feel as if you're on tenterhooks with the person who claims to love you, and if you don't feel you can be yourself with that person then you need to look carefully at that relationship. Coercive control is abusive, even if it's not physical.

[Hane]

On 12/11/2019 at 11:02 PM, Soulhuntress said:

 She is not in a good place for her life to fall apart.  Family is his.  Friends are his.  And I feel bad for her mom.  Not sure why but mom has to be going out of her mind!

The fact that she seems isolated or estranged from her family of origin is cause for concern. One of the indicators that I’d have to end things with my second husband was the time he casually said, “I wonder where we’ll end up living when we retire.” I just said something like, “Well, I don’t know about you, but I plan to stay around here, where my family and friends are.” He didn’t have any friends, and his family relationships were tenuous at best. There was no way I wanted to wind up isolated with him.

[ViolaSebastian]

Some "womp, womps" from various blog entries:

Quote

The furniture in this pic is from Craigslist, the plant is from a thrift store, and all the pillows came with the couch! My husband picked out the furniture, and I truly disliked it when I saw the photos! Red just isn't my favorite color! But I gave it a shot, and what do you know... I love it.

Quote

Maybe when your boyfriend is gone for the weekend, you can eat the foods YOU want for dinner, or take time for a manicure! Busy at work? Think of the promotion you're working towards. You have the flu? Think of the much-needed rest your body is getting. Whatever it is, I believe you can think about almost ANY negative time-out, and switch it into something positive.

What an unhealthy dynamic. I'm a less adventurous eater than a lot of people, so I sort of understand the "eat what *I* want for dinner," but it's sad and it implies that you're never eating what you'd like to unless your boyfriend goes out of town. 

[Soulhuntress]

4 hours ago, ViolaSebastian said:

What an unhealthy dynamic. I'm a less adventurous eater than a lot of people, so I sort of understand the "eat what *I* want for dinner," but it's sad and it implies that you're never eating what you'd like to unless your boyfriend goes out of town. 

Well that actually makes sense when you like fish and your partner does not like it.  Or the smell.  Everyone has their "no" foods (liver makes me gag: the smell and everything related to the nasty stuff). Control issues with Husbear (gag) and Mrs Midwest make the whole thing extra squicky.    

[Soulhuntress]

And Caitlin waves Hi.  Just so you know 1-800-656-HOPE can get you to someone if you need to talk.  Or need a safe place to stay.  ?

[mymelody]

Caitlin talks so much about how 'traditional' she is, she is so traditional that she was able to leave her parents, go to college, marry a man they don't approve of etc. What I don't understand is that 'tradition' means those terrible things too, it means your father (in some cases mother) promising you to a man he chose from your birth/a very young age. There would be no chance for her to be with her current husband and marry him without the presence of parents. Of course I don't know about her father but we do know her Mother didn't go to her wedding because of her disapproval of the groom. The only reason she could do this is because of the current free society that emerged from hardwork of people including feminists!! who as we know she is so against.

 

She also mentioned in one video (too lazy to look through) that women's femininity allows them to nurture and take care of those around us for example aging parents. Then I wonder, why not mention briefly that some parents are too toxic to be around so you shouldn't care for them as they will take advantage of you and try to control you. I also do not like people who think this way parents shouldn't be having children thinking that the children will always take care of them, it's selfish. If Caitlin is not 'taking care' of her mother than can she please be honest as this is not a healthy standard to put on anyone. I know because I was forced to look after my grandmother and she took advantage of me.

 

Edited December 15, 2019 by mymelody
grammar error

[ViolaSebastian]

She was pretty defensive on the last video that just because someone is “put together” on the outside doesn’t mean that they’re harboring some dark secret. Which...okay, yes, that’s true. But in her case, there *is* a “dark secret” that she’s not being fully honest about.  I completely agree that she doesn’t have to tell anyone anything she’s not ready to discuss, but the problem here is that she she does discuss it on her Reddit and Quora—she’s estranged from her parents over her choice of husband. She posted this stuff under her blog’s name and under her real name, respectively, so it isn’t as though people doxxed her to find this information out. It’s now public knowledge because she posted it publicly. They may be toxic, too, but that’s up for debate, as she follows her father’s social media account, so it seems like she’s made an effort to repair the relationship with her father somewhat, at least. 

In any case, it’s a sad situation, and @mymelody, you’re completely right—she made a very feminist choice to marry a man against her parent’s wishes. 

As someone with an estranged parent, I understand. My father is a toxic individual, full stop. Some people in my life know that and others don’t. I guess the issue is, if I started posting on social media, under my real name, that “I’m So and So and I’m estranged from my family,” there can’t be an expectation of privacy in that matter. I also can’t be surprised when people object when I start to claim that I’m someone who loves family and thinks traditionalism is the best thing since homemade bread. Unfortunately, it’s the not addressing it on her YouTube channel that makes her seem inauthentic. If she hadn’t discussed it in other places, it wouldn’t be an issue. But she did, so it’s out there, and thus the appearance that she has a “dark secret.” The video about how great her mom was didn’t help either. That took things from “dark secret” to actively being untruthful by omission. At this point, with things easily Googleable, it’d probably be best just to make a video telling the truth about whats happened—the whole deal—and whatever lesson she wants to tack on about traditionalism or femininity. And no, she doesn’t have to do this until she’s ready to handle announcing that on her YouTube channel—I’m not suggesting that at all, by any means. (Although she’s already addressed it publicly through other avenues). It’s just that this point, the cat is out of the bag—and that’s by her own doing.   I had a shrink tell me “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” Sometimes it’s better to just tell the truth and shame the devil. Be upfront about it and decide you won’t feel shame about it anymore. It helps. 

Edited December 15, 2019 by ViolaSebastian

[snarky_snark]

Warning: massive wall of text incoming. 

It is important to note that Caitlin is not “traditional.” She is red-pilled. There is a big difference between the two. 

While Caitlin has claimed on her channel that Christianity inspired her femininity and that she grew up more traditionally (more on why I believe this is a white lie later), it is clear in her interview with Yogioabs that it was her introduction to red pill forums (i.e., Return of Kings and MGTOW) that actually started her transformation. 

Broadly speaking, red pillers believe in traditional gender roles for men and women. There’s also a bit of white nationalism involved, and some red pillers LARP as Christians. If you observe the things that Caitlin says, many of her views sound more red-pilled than Christian or “traditional.”

Caitlin - and red pillers in general - are very loose in what they define as “traditional.” She claims she is devoutly religious, and urges women to be modest… yet she makes videos with a face full of makeup and clearly adorns herself to be sexually alluring to men. Analytics shows that most of her viewers are also men. She urges women to do things from scratch… yet she uses modern appliances like laundry and bread machines. She claims to follow an ancestral diet, and that she wants to live like her ancestors...but she also follows a Korean skincare regime. She claims that she tries to live femininely… but what she really means is that she wants to live as a 1950s housewife. The vast majority of women throughout history did lots of dirty work - toiling the fields, working as domestic servants, seamstresses, or factory workers, and so on. Most women throughout history didn’t have the luxury of being housewives, and they certainly didn’t spend their days listening to podcasts, thrifting, decorating, and doing a load of laundry every now and again. 

Since I already knew about TRP by the time I discovered Mrs. Midwest, I could make her out from a mile away. But people who don’t know about the red pill probably wouldn’t have any idea. And this leads me to what bothers me the most about Caitlin.

She knows very, very well that her actual views would alienate people. So she paints herself as something she’s not. From her reddit and Quora accounts (which, surprise surprise, are now deleted!), it’s clear that she is estranged from her parents - and seems to have a particular dislike of her mother. But on her channel, she praises her mother and speaks of her as though they are still on good terms. It is also clear that the Red Pill inspired her “~Femininity Journey~”, yet in a Q&A, she said that she gains feminine inspiration from the Bible. She claims that she wants to live wholesomely, yet her now deleted social media accounts showed that she was primarily concerned with how to be more “red pilled” and how to improve her appearance. And let’s not forget that her channel’s comments are heavily moderated, so we have no idea how many people actually agree with her. 

I at least have respect for other Fundies who are honest and upfront about what they believe. Caitlin drives me up the wall because she is intentionally manipulative about the way she presents herself. Every smile, every giggle, every gesture, every omission is calculated. Her "femininity" isn't natural at all. It is practiced, and her guides were men like Roosh and Yogioabs, for fuck's sake. 

Not very feminine, and certainly not very Christian, Cait.

[JermajestyDuggar]

15 minutes ago, snarky_snark said:

I at least have respect for other Fundies who are honest and upfront about what they believe. Caitlin drives me up the wall because she is intentionally manipulative about the way she presents herself. Every smile, every giggle, every gesture, every omission is calculated. Her "femininity" isn't natural at all. It is practiced, and her guides were men like Roosh and Yogioabs, for fuck's sake. 

I totally agree that she is completely fake. The first time I watched a video I knew within 10 seconds that she was a fraud. The way she talks is exceptionally fake sounding. It’s like she’s giving a well rehearsed speech for 10th grade debate team. There is nothing natural about her behavior in her videos. It amazes me that others don’t see right through it. It’s actually pretty awkward. But people likely don’t notice because she’s pretty and sounds confident.

[Marmion]

2 minutes ago, snarky_snark said:

Warning: massive wall of text incoming. 

It is important to note that Caitlin is not “traditional.” She is red-pilled. There is a big difference between the two. 

While Caitlin has claimed on her channel that Christianity inspired her femininity and that she grew up more traditionally (more on why I believe this is a white lie later), it is clear in her interview with Yogioabs that it was her introduction to red pill forums (i.e., Return of Kings and MGTOW) that actually started her transformation. 

Broadly speaking, red pillers believe in traditional gender roles for men and women. There’s also a bit of white nationalism involved, and some red pillers LARP as Christians. If you observe the things that Caitlin says, many of her views sound more red-pilled than Christian or “traditional.”

Caitlin - and red pillers in general - are very loose in what they define as “traditional.” She claims she is devoutly religious, and urges women to be modest… yet she makes videos with a face full of makeup and clearly adorns herself to be sexually alluring to men. Analytics shows that most of her viewers are also men. She urges women to do things from scratch… yet she uses modern appliances like laundry and bread machines. She claims to follow an ancestral diet, and that she wants to live like her ancestors...but she also follows a Korean skincare regime. She claims that she tries to live femininely… but what she really means is that she wants to live as a 1950s housewife. The vast majority of women throughout history did lots of dirty work - toiling the fields, working as domestic servants, seamstresses, or factory workers, and so on. Most women throughout history didn’t have the luxury of being housewives, and they certainly didn’t spend their days listening to podcasts, thrifting, decorating, and doing a load of laundry every now and again. 

Since I already knew about TRP by the time I discovered Mrs. Midwest, I could make her out from a mile away. But people who don’t know about the red pill probably wouldn’t have any idea. And this leads me to what bothers me the most about Caitlin.

She knows very, very well that her actual views would alienate people. So she paints herself as something she’s not. From her reddit and Quora accounts (which, surprise surprise, are now deleted!), it’s clear that she is estranged from her parents - and seems to have a particular dislike of her mother. But on her channel, she praises her mother and speaks of her as though they are still on good terms. It is also clear that the Red Pill inspired her “~Femininity Journey~”, yet in a Q&A, she said that she gains feminine inspiration from the Bible. She claims that she wants to live wholesomely, yet her now deleted social media accounts showed that she was primarily concerned with how to be more “red pilled” and how to improve her appearance. And let’s not forget that her channel’s comments are heavily moderated, so we have no idea how many people actually agree with her. 

I at least have respect for other Fundies who are honest and upfront about what they believe. Caitlin drives me up the wall because she is intentionally manipulative about the way she presents herself. Every smile, every giggle, every gesture, every omission is calculated. Her "femininity" isn't natural at all. It is practiced, and her guides were men like Roosh and Yogioabs, for fuck's sake. 

Not very feminine, and certainly not very Christian, Cait.

Yes , this is what I had suspected about her all along , especially since she has somewhat reminded me of this one other YouTuber I used to hate watch .  ( warning , a video interview of , and a monologue  by ,  the other red pill young woman , for an example of what I mean  )   

  https://redice.tv/radio-3fourteen/advice-for-young-women-who-want-to-live-a-feminine-life   They'll take a more subtle approach , so as not to be blatantly neo-Nazi , and / or white nationalist .  However , if and when you scratch beneath the surface , you might notice that they have a hidden dark side .  

[quiversR4hunting]

22 hours ago, ViolaSebastian said:

I had a shrink tell me “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” Sometimes it’s better to just tell the truth and shame the devil. Be upfront about it and decide you won’t feel shame about it anymore. It helps. 

Thank you! I needed to read this today for things unrelated to Caitlin/Mrs. Midwest. Thank you! 

[kaluce]

16 hours ago, Marmion said:

Yes , this is what I had suspected about her all along , especially since she has somewhat reminded me of this one other YouTuber I used to hate watch .  ( warning , a video interview of , and a monologue  by ,  the other red pill young woman , for an example of what I mean  )   

  https://redice.tv/radio-3fourteen/advice-for-young-women-who-want-to-live-a-feminine-life   They'll take a more subtle approach , so as not to be blatantly neo-Nazi , and / or white nationalist .  However , if and when you scratch beneath the surface , you might notice that they have a hidden dark side .  

Ooooof I love how she's like "Around the time I found the redpill, I also started getting into conspiracies- like the global warming hoax". That basically tells you all you need to know ahahah

She sounds like a lonely and easily manipulated young woman, much like Mrs. Midwest. 

[feministxtian]

Southern women and cussing...southern women (I am one) have the most amazing way with language. Even if they don't use actual cuss words, you can understand the "fuck you" VERY clearly. We're sassy, sarcastic, can and will cuss a blue streak, stronger than you'd think, take no shit from no one...and for all our talk of submission to our men, we know who really rules the roost. 

Girls are raised to be strong women and boys are raised to respect the women in their lives for fear their mama will beat them to within an inch of their lives. (just ask my kids)

[ViolaSebastian]

Now, I realize this can be cultural. However, I was taught that a man walks behind a woman. 

Edited December 17, 2019 by ViolaSebastian

[JermajestyDuggar]

27 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

Now, I realize this can be cultural. However, I was taught that a man walks behind a woman. 

This is one of those things that people will make into a huge deal, which shows way more about them than anyone else. My husband and I never even think about who walks first. It’s a mix. My husband doesn’t put me on some sort of pedestal due to chivalry and he doesn’t treat me as less than because I’m a woman. We are equal partners in our marriage. People who make a huge deal out of these types of things are usually the ones with issues. If you feel your manhood is threatened because your wife walks in front of you, then you’ve got issues. My personal opinion is that Michelle and Barack mix things up and she isn’t always walking first. They just do their thing. Because they are a team. But Trump likely tells Melania he wants to walk first because he’s an insecure man child. I’m sure Trump makes a big deal out of this while Barack likely doesn’t think much about it. 

[mymelody]

1 hour ago, ViolaSebastian said:

Now, I realize this can be cultural. However, I was taught that a man walks behind a woman. 

for me walking behind a man is cultural however this aspect of my culture I don't like. I am trying to break this habit and guilty feeling I get whenever I am with a man, it feels wrong for me to walk ahead like I am telling a man that I am better than him?? I really am trying to improve this as I was probably taught this through my culture and some of my family, I don't want to pass this on and I want it gone from my culture honestly.

@JermajestyDuggar I agree a man who feels like his masculinity is threatened by a woman walking a few steps ahead is very insecure, I can imagine Caitlin's husband being similar, I wouldn't even be surprised if he likes trump.

[Hane]

In the etiquette rules I learned in the Pleistocene, a man followed a woman upstairs so that, if she stumbled, he could catch her (the assumption being that a man would be larger and have greater strength).

[JermajestyDuggar]

41 minutes ago, Hane said:

In the etiquette rules I learned in the Pleistocene, a man followed a woman upstairs so that, if she stumbled, he could catch her (the assumption being that a man would be larger and have greater strength).

Lol I’m bigger than my husband. So I guess it’s better we don’t follow that. 

[ViolaSebastian]

My thought on it is that women typically are shorter and have shorter legs. We're also more likely to be wearing shoes that make no freaking sense. It's rude to just take off on somebody, so you only walk as fast as the slowest person.

In other news, the printer who makes Yogi's "feminism is cancer" products has declined to make them any longer, citing that they are hate speech. 

Edited December 17, 2019 by ViolaSebastian

[AliceInFundyland]

... One of the things where my BFF is way better than me is paying attention to streets when we're together.

My tendency to solo living is a total hindrance when I drive or walk with other people. I get distracted by talking and completely forget to focus on the road.

That, coupled with her terrible sense of direction, makes her hyper aware of navigating.

 I get pulled out of streets with enough regularity that I know to mention it as a thing.

On my own I can suck a mint, drink water, watch for cars, crazy people, hunt Pokémon and listen to podcasts while I walk. ?

 

 

Edited December 17, 2019 by AliceInFundyland

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, AliceInFundyland said:

... One of the things where my BFF is way better than me is paying attention to streets when we're together.

My tendency to solo living is a total hindrance when I drive or walk with other people. I get distracted by talking and completely forget to focus on the road.

That, coupled with her terrible sense of direction, makes her hyper aware of navigating.

 I get pulled out of streets with enough regularity that I know to mention it as a thing.

On my own I can suck a mint, drink water, watch for cars, crazy people, hunt Pokémon and listen to podcasts while I walk. ?

 

 

This is why I’m a bad driver. Because I’m pretty easily distracted by people in the car. But I get super carsick if I don’t drive. So my husband lets me be the main driver in our family. And I’m sure he hates it. But I haven’t gotten in any accidents since we’ve been together. I just miss so many turns! 

[Marmion]

The only rule of etiquette I have heard on this is that the man should stand along side the woman , in order to should her if needed .  https://www.bnd.com/latest-news/article207496274.html  Also it brings to mind this song . 

 

Edited December 18, 2019 by Marmion

[feministxtian]

Mr. Xtian liked to walk behind me...no reason other than he liked watching my ass. He had a fixation on my ass.