Dillards 81: Volunteering for God

[QuiverFullofBooks]

Jill posted a lot about Thanksgiving on her blog and Instagram. There’s a video that really should have been edited down. Being mildly interested in her life doesn’t mean that we need to watch her turkey defrosting for minutes on end. She used paper plates, even though there were all of four adults. Your parents have an excuse, Jill - you do not. She didn’t seem to have made any effort to make the table look nice. 

In the blog post she made a point of saying that watching the parade is a Dillard family tradition. (Of course the Duggars don’t watch it - there’s Rockettes and Santa and bands from secular schools with cheerleaders!) 

I think Derick likes the smaller celebrations, and getting to make decisions like whether to watch the parade. I could see that in two ways: is he a controlling guy who’s keeping Jill away from her family, or is he giving her independence from an overwhelmingly large and controlling family? Sadly, it’s probably both.

[Idlewild]

I think maybe a bit much has been read into it. Yes, the Dillards are going down a slightly different path, but Jill still tags her family in posts ( including congratulating Josh) and I’m fairly sure still has horrible beliefs despite the gift wrapping- rather like Jinger. 
My view - they wanted thanksgiving in their new house to make their own traditions rather than having to take 2 small boys to what looked like a canteen dinner. Derick has limited time off and wants time with his family not eating off paper plates and listening to JB. Plus Jill managed to get in some Black Friday paid peddling of Amy’s shop which she couldn’t have done had she had to don the gingham apron & serve her brothers! 
Edited to add I didn’t realise she used paper plates too- one tradition she couldn’t shake off!! 

Edited November 29, 2019 by Idlewild

[SilverBeach]

7 minutes ago, Idlewild said:

I didn’t realise she used paper plates too- one tradition she couldn’t shake off!! 

I just don't get this. Never eating off real plates. It's so lazy.

[JanasTattooParlor]

Just now, SilverBeach said:

I just don't get this. Never eating off real plates. It's so lazy.

For big family holidays it makes sense to me probably because my family used to do the same thing. We always ate off of paper plates for holiday dinners because that made less dishes for the person hosting to deal with and we always had too many people and not enough of the “nice” china that my grandmother would use for Sunday dinners after church. I can’t imagine, especially at the Duggars shindig that looked huge, that they would want to clean dishes for that many people, and even for Jill’s smaller thanksgiving, maybe she just wanted to spend time with friends and didn’t want more dishes to do after everyone left. 

[SilverBeach]

Just now, JanasTattooParlor said:

For big family holidays it makes sense to me probably because my family used to do the same thing. We always ate off of paper plates for holiday dinners because that made less dishes for the person hosting to deal with and we always had too many people and not enough of the “nice” china that my grandmother would use for Sunday dinners after church. I can’t imagine, especially at the Duggars shindig that looked huge, that they would want to clean dishes for that many people, and even for Jill’s smaller thanksgiving, maybe she just wanted to spend time with friends and didn’t want more dishes to do after everyone left. 

I understand all of this and use paper plates in everyday life, but seldom for dinner. Jill doesn't have a big family. And we used real plates for holidays regardless of how many were present. Why even have real plates if you never use them? It's nice eating off china. The Duggars and such have ginormous families which means dozens of hand to clean up. The TTH even had two commercial dishwashers, IIRC. There are kitchen chores to be done after any gathering, loading a dishwasher takes a few minutes. I still think this is more about laziness than anything, as the Duggars use disposable shit all the time. 

[PennySycamore]

We did use paper plates at my daughter's house yesterday, but a vote was taken by those of us in my daughter's kitchen as to which to use: real plates or T-day themed paper and paper won out.  My daughter does have a dishwasher, but even with paper plates she had a lot of dishes to wash.  Now,  my dishwasher is kaput and has been for 12 years and I still use the nice china for holiday dinners.  Sometimes my husband helps, but I have a routine down now.  It involves having every dishtowel I own clean and several fillings of the sink with fresh soapy hot water.

[Coco]

57 minutes ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

[...]
In the blog post she made a point of saying that watching the parade is a Dillard family tradition. (Of course the Duggars don’t watch it - there’s Rockettes and Santa and bands from secular schools with cheerleaders!) 

That's gotta be Derrick, Mr Pistol Pete  ? I just hope that Jill's free enough to not be fighting it inside. I used to think she was the most ridiculous but now I'm starting a tiny bit to respect her and cheer for them. It can take years to get free though. I resented my hubby for about 6 years for not being patriarchal/religious enough before I started my trip to freedom. Ironically it started with finding out that the biblical Flood was local lmao. 

So true D probably hates having to listen to JB lol can't imagine the torture without some relief like watching a game. 

[Idlewild]

I’m not in the US so don’t celebrate Thanksgiving and I also don’t have a large family but for me celebration dinners are all about being special- nicely set table etc. I realise I’ve turned into my mother...

I’ve used plastic plates for picnics and summer barbecues but paper plates at the dinner table looks odd. I can understand why people above say they do it though. 

[DalmatianCat]

8 hours ago, kiwi said:

So the dills arent at the big house for thanksgiving, instead sharing a meal with friends (including a turkey defrosted in the bath... ).
 

I’ve noticed over the last several years that the married Dugger children seem to spend Thanksgiving with their in-laws and Christmas is the holiday they spend with their family. Jessa and Joy were with their in-laws, Jinger was in Cali, and the Dillards were doing their own thing. They all seem to come home at Christmas (with the exception of Jinger...she and Jeremy seem to rotate Christmas with his and her family).

Edited November 29, 2019 by DalmatianCat
Punctuation

[Four is Enough]

In the spirit of "many hands make light work", my family has ALWAYS served Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners on the "good" china... AND the "other" china, and the "extra" china... and we've never run out of plates, AND clean up is a snap when all the moms congregate in the kitchen, with one running the dishwasher, one hand washing the big things, one tidying up the table, one putting the leftovers into the refrigerator, and one getting out the desserts and making coffee... that's part of the fun when you get together!

[WarriorJane]

No, no it is NOT safe to defrost the turkey in the bathtub. It needs to be defrosted slowly in the fridge, possibly for a couple of days if it's big enough.  Again with the lack of homemaking skills from these godly homemakers.   

And I agree about the paper plates.   What's the difference if you have 1 person washing dishes for 5, or 10 people washing dishes for 50?  And all that heavy Thanksgiving food-- how do the plates not just fall apart?  

[Arkfundy]

In her group “Friendsgiving” Israel is obviously crying. That’s sad. I know it was prob something as simple as “I’m playing with my toys and don’t want to take a picture” etc but don’t post a pic of your child upset. Surely they could have captured another one later that would have been more appropriate. 

[HereticHick]

If I had TWO industrial dishwashers and a houseful of tweens and teens to load them & scrub pots, you can be damn sure I'd be using real plates and tableware. Lazy-ass Duggars.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, WarriorJane said:

No, no it is NOT safe to defrost the turkey in the bathtub. It needs to be defrosted slowly in the fridge, possibly for a couple of days if it's big enough.  Again with the lack of homemaking skills from these godly homemakers.   

And I agree about the paper plates.   What's the difference if you have 1 person washing dishes for 5, or 10 people washing dishes for 50?  And all that heavy Thanksgiving food-- how do the plates not just fall apart?  

Actually yes it is, if you do like Jill said, and change the water ever 30 minutes, it is considered a "quick thaw", but it is a PITA and a waste of water. 

 

https://blog.thermoworks.com/turkey/properly-thaw-turkey/

[lumpentheologie]

I don't think any of the marrieds were at the big house Thanksgiving besides the Smuggars. I didn't see any in the pictures, anyway.  It probably wasn't a big deal Jill wasn't there either, although I do think it was a bit strange they weren't with Derick's family. 

[Bad Wolf]

I always find that it takes much longer than 2 days to thaw even a small turkey in the refrigerator. Still solid as a rock, so I usually start 4 days before, and there may still be ice in the middle.

[PennySycamore]

4 minutes ago, Bad Wolf said:

I always find that it takes much longer than 2 days to thaw even a small turkey in the refrigerator. Still solid as a rock, so I usually start 4 days before, and there may still be ice in the middle.

 Thawing a turkey is one reason why I try to always get fresh birds.  I tried dry brining the turkey for Thanksgiving last year and I think it helps if there is a little ice in the bird.  I'm not sure that the fresh turkey is always really a fresh turkey.  I've run into icy turkeys so often that I think these turkeys may have beeb frozen and then defrosted.  It does help if you go to a great supermarket and I feel the bird before putting it in my cart.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, Bad Wolf said:

I always find that it takes much longer than 2 days to thaw even a small turkey in the refrigerator. Still solid as a rock, so I usually start 4 days before, and there may still be ice in the middle.

I had an 18lb turkey this year and we took it out of the freezer on Sunday morning, and there was just a bit of ice left in the cavity of the bird. 

[bella8050]

2 hours ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

I think Derick likes the smaller celebrations, and getting to make decisions like whether to watch the parade. I could see that in two ways: is he a controlling guy who’s keeping Jill away from her family, or is he giving her independence from an overwhelmingly large and controlling family? Sadly, it’s probably both.

I'm torn on this too. Probably cause of the shitty way he acts at times and given what he was willing to marry into. 

I'm hoping Jill is enjoying the relative quiet of her "little family" as she's called it a few times recently. Maybe the chaos of TTH makes her anxious now, and she's happier with her own home. But unless she comes out and says what's going on with regards to how she feels about her family I gotta wonder how much of the distance is Derick's influence because he's soured on the Duggars, and not that he's protecting Jill's mental health.

 

[Coco]

So what went down to make them move out of the house JB gave them? The one with the gorgeous doors and huge kitchen (where he made creepy jokes on one episode, gotta keep to form) ?

[bella8050]

So Derick replied to a comment on Jill's IG (annoying as its not directed towards him). He was responding to someone else within this thread of replies but that comment is gone, must have been show related though. Kind over the vague posts about the show. We get it Derick you are mad that you felt taken advantage of by the show and your FIL. Your wife has yet to express the same feelings publicly so maybe time to lay off, especially on HER account.

[HideousGreenShirt]

16 minutes ago, bella8050 said:

As @bella8050 said, this is NOT actually the comment he was responding to: the original has been deleted. (For instagram newbies/non users, it's a different username and account that Derick @ replied to.) I agree it's annoying that he randomly hops into her comments to post things like this. Just tell us the whole story already or move on bro. 

Also, in Jill's endless video she does mention that they are having three Thanksgivings (4.21 minute mark) so who knows what else they got up to yesterday. 

Agree with @CarrotCake Jill looks amazing in the new 3130 photo with the pleather leggings. I hope she will take on any styling tips that Amy or whoever styled her for this photo and run with them. 

Spoiler

 

Edited November 29, 2019 by HideousGreenShirt
Clarity

[Beermeet]

4 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I just don't get this. Never eating off real plates. It's so lazy.

It really is. Paper plates have their place in society.  Proper holiday dinners are not one, imo.  My family for a few years had massive Thanksgivings.  Like over 30 people.  The host literally didn't have enough real plates. She did get the sturdy throw aways though.  Clean up was never an issue when it got smaller and real plates were used.  Too many people to help and we're not rude folks so, fasted clean up ever.  

BBQ?  Paper plates all day.  Holiday feast with 4 people,  use the damn real plates. 

I don't own a dishwasher, much to my surprise.  When we looked at the house we are renting I didn't notice the lack of until I was unpacking the kitchen boxes.  At first, I thought it would be no biggie and remembered my grandma who refused to get one. She seemed fine.  Yeah, no. It sucks!  Grandparents cleaned on a level we never will. I'm saying that as a 46 yr old. 46 yr old grandma's are a different generation.  My point is, lazy!!!!  Especially if they have a dishwasher that is not human. 

[Beermeet]

4 hours ago, Four is Enough said:

In the spirit of "many hands make light work", my family has ALWAYS served Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners on the "good" china... AND the "other" china, and the "extra" china... and we've never run out of plates, AND clean up is a snap when all the moms congregate in the kitchen, with one running the dishwasher, one hand washing the big things, one tidying up the table, one putting the leftovers into the refrigerator, and one getting out the desserts and making coffee... that's part of the fun when you get together!

Love this!

Makes me want to tell a story from all my childhood.  It doesn't seem real now!

Picture it, 1978-1992 ( my time of remembrance and before I moved away), Italian immigrant family.  When clean up came around, the women and us girls old enough to help, went to the kitchen to clean up together and share stories, gossip and be together.  The men were in the livingroom relaxing, smoking, maybe a few with anisette cordials, with Mr. Fama playing accordion and the men and boys signing Italian songs.  It was fantastic!  I can't believe I got to live that. No TV was on, if the one house phone rang you'd pick it up!  Clearly a friend or family was on the other side with well wishes.  A neighbor always dropped off his awaited homemade bathtub sangria and he was always tipsy and full of life.  Great times.  

[Cheetah]

Just chiming to agree with all of the proper dinner plate people... with a dishwasher, washing the plates and silverware is the easy part.... it's the endless mixing bowls and saucepans that take forever to wash on Thanksgiving.  (We did end up using a disposable foil roasting pan for our turkey this year - my big roasting pan rusted out a few years ago and the roasting rack doesn't fit in my 9x13 pans).