M is for Mama 5: Praying for Lunch

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Just now, Melissa1977 said:

She is choosing being miserable.

Proving that if Mama ain't happy she'll make damn sure no one is happy. Because misery loves company ... lots of company

[JermajestyDuggar]

She’s choosing to be a martyr. I can’t stand people like this. Some people have very few choices in life due to being born into shit circumstances. But Braggie was born into privilege and has many choices. But she chooses to be miserable. And make her children miserable in The process.

[ladyaudley]

6 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

Yeah, the pill if taken every day without fail is much more effective than natural family planning. It's just that sometimes women forget to take them or some women are extra fertile and a pregnancy happens. 

FAM done right (temping and CM observation) is just as effective. So either Abbie has ridiculously regular cycles and is also lucky and/or very conservative with when they have sex OR she’s doing proper FAM, which is in no way leaving anything up to anyone. 

[Tatar-tot]

She could get her tubes tied or the hubbie could get the big V.

None of these kids are accidents. She wants to be pregnant and makes damn sure she is.  What a loon!  

[TuringMachine]

None of the people we follow ever seem to be really "leaving it up to god." Either they're actively trying to have as many kids as possible, or they're using some sort of family planning. The reason they don't take birth control is because it doesn't fit in with their pro life narrative. 

[ladyaudley]

I just wish they called it „not taking hormonal birth control“. Because that’s very different from just getting it on whenever and dealing with possible pregnancies as and when they occur. 

[Baxter]

30 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

Jenny Flanders's husband actually advised his daughter to go to dental school. She went. They are fundies but they support educating their daughters and sons. I find it fascinating that Abbie is so up Jenny's butt because Jenny is not materialistic and into time-consuming personal hobbies like Abbie.

 

I expect it is because Jennifer and her husband are considered pillars of the community. They are "godly" people with twelve children. Their kids all appear to be successful themselves. Jennifer quite successfully homeschools them. So far I think of the children, they have a doctor, two dentists and an engineer. Her husband is a doctor. They have a large house. I don't agree that Jennifer is unmaterialistic. She just has a different aesthetic for her home decorating. More early 90s which makes sense since that is when she first had the money to decorate. They no doubt get a lot of attention. Abbie likes attention so she sort of wants to be like Jennifer and so she sucks up to her. 

But the Flanders are deceptively rotten. Jenny mentions an amusing anecdote about a squirrel stealing their spank stick in a Christmas letter like obviously hitting kids with a stick is no big deal. There are also mentions of training children. They are very anti abortion so there is a lot of not so nice stuff under that shiny exterior. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

She seriously sounds disappointed she only received one negative comment. She’s such a troll.

[Marly]

She has no idea about the meaning of counter-culture.
The counter-culture movement was so important for the emancipation of minorities and then she dares using it to describe her way of living??? For having 10 kids? That's not counter-cultural. Especially not in a part of the country where it might not even be wise to tell your neighbours you're an atheist or you don't go to church. 
Counter-cultural my ass. ?

Edited April 18, 2020 by Marly

[Timetraveler]

She should have a meeting with Mrs Midwest. They can brag about their small waistlines, decorating skills and how 'countercultural' they are.

[SassyPants]

I wish she’d buy a full length mirror and mount it somewhere, anywhere, outside of her bathroom. She has a 8000 sq ft house(per her), she has to have a place....even on the back of her door. So sick I seeing a commode in the background of all of her selfies.

[Melissa1977]

2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I wish she’d buy a full length mirror and mount it somewhere, anywhere, outside of her bathroom. She has a 8000 sq ft house(per her), she has to have a place....even on the back of her door. So sick I seeing a commode in the background of all of her selfies.

Yeeeees!!!! Who wants to see the toilet seat? She has a very big house. Makes no sense.

[Walking Cat Bed]

18 hours ago, Tatar-tot said:

She could get her tubes tied or the hubbie could get the big V.

None of these kids are accidents. She wants to be pregnant and makes damn sure she is.  What a loon!  

Right? For all of her talk about how pregnancy/parenting is sanctifying, hardisnotthesameasbad, etc etc, she's not doing much to prevent the pregnancies that make her miserable or trying to present these as wanted pregnancies. 

[SassyPants]

I just don’t understand why anyone would keep having kids that they really do not want to parent or raise. How is that in anyone’s best interest? How is saying nasty things about pregnancy, sex of embryos...Godly or serving Him? What sane couple would do this? And her parents and his are enablers. They should cut off all the support; make the idiots deal with the consequences  of their choices. Recently she had made negative comments about having to Co-op teach. I figured the earlier than normal pregnancy was an effort to get out of that job. The woman doesn’t like kids! When I hear of folks like this having kid after, and then see Michaela, I swear I really question the existence of of a divine creator!

[SuperNova]

6 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I wish she’d buy a full length mirror and mount it somewhere, anywhere, outside of her bathroom. She has a 8000 sq ft house(per her), she has to have a place....even on the back of her door. So sick I seeing a commode in the background of all of her selfies.

She said in a past post that she doesn't get a full length mirror because the toilet in the background offsets the attention grab of a selfie. So basically it's a pitiful attempt to hide her complete narcissism by not having a perfectly curated picture.

[JermajestyDuggar]

This is a good example of how Braggie doesn’t keep an eye on her younger kids. That chair is not in the bathroom normally. A two year old had to push the chair from the dining room or school room to the bathroom. Make sure the bathroom door is open. And then climb up and turn on the tap. She notes that this is not the first time. Sorry but if you aren’t able to keep an eye on #7 then maybe you shouldn’t be having #9 and #10.

[SuperNova]

4 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

This is a good example of how Braggie doesn’t keep an eye on her younger kids. That chair is not in the bathroom normally. A two year old had to push the chair from the dining room or school room to the bathroom. Make sure the bathroom door is open. And then climb up and turn on the tap. She notes that this is not the first time. Sorry but if you aren’t able to keep an eye on #7 then maybe you shouldn’t be having #9 and #10.

I hate this post so much. It's the one that that really turned the tide for me. I felt so terrible for Honor. This is not two. This is two for a child of Abbie's, neglected long enough to have put himself in harm's way. A toddler this small doesn't understand guilt the way that Abbie understands it. SHE should have been the one with guilt. 

On another note, I seriously take issue with her calling herself counter culture. Abbie is about as mainstream as it gets. She's a white, upper middle class, Christian, mommy blogger, living in an echo chamber who's only quirk is not being able to keep her legs closed. Jesus Christ, has this woman ever spent any time outside of her bubble? 

[Ozlsn]

5 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

This is a good example of how Braggie doesn’t keep an eye on her younger kids. That chair is not in the bathroom normally. A two year old had to push the chair from the dining room or school room to the bathroom. Make sure the bathroom door is open. And then climb up and turn on the tap. She notes that this is not the first time. Sorry but if you aren’t able to keep an eye on #7 then maybe you shouldn’t be having #9 and #10.

I am looking at that wallpaper and thinking... my child would have coloured that in so quickly. Yes, in the 5 minutes I was trying to shower. I still have letters of the alphabet written in pencil on one wall (dim spot, took me a couple of years to realise..)

Also I know kids move quickly but to get the chair in would have taken some time and noise, so just how long did it take her to investigate?

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, Ozlsn said:

I am looking at that wallpaper and thinking... my child would have coloured that in so quickly. Yes, in the 5 minutes I was trying to shower. I still have letters of the alphabet written in pencil on one wall (dim spot, took me a couple of years to realise..)

Also I know kids move quickly but to get the chair in would have taken some time and noise, so just how long did it take her to investigate?

Exactly. And it was more than once. When it happens once, you keep the door closed. She brags about how well her older kids behave. It wouldn’t be hard to ask them to close the bathroom door behind them so the toddler doesn’t flood the bathroom again. Or you know, she could stop relying on her older kids to parent and put up a baby gate and keep an eye on her toddler.

I say this as someone who utilized baby gates and kept the bathroom door closed all during the toddler stages. I have two boys the age of her twins and Theo.

[Hane]

On 4/17/2020 at 8:59 AM, anachronistic said:

My family was all secretly hoping for a girl with Nibling2, but when he was born we never thought that again because Nibling2 is just plain *delightful*. He is warm and round and cuddly and - that makes him sound like a puppy, oops - he is tenacious and happy and all the good things. One of the main things that I truly miss during this social distancing thing is spending time with kids and being witness to their energy and excitement over block towers or their favorite show or that particular page in that particular book. One of the weirdest things about Braggie is that she never seems to feel the joy of having kids. She doesn’t seem to treasure the little moments, she only gets angry at the little things. Kids being passionate about stuff is amazing. Kids wanting to go up to you and talk about cats or legos or heaven help us Trolls is wonderful. If her kids want to talk about their interests they probably talk to each other or to their grandparents, certainly never their mother. Braggie wouldn’t care.

 

also it definitely seems like that blog post was written like a big FU to FJ, the way that it addresses so many of our concerns like how nuts she was to plan to be pregnant while in Europe. She had no plans to do that! No way! Also she implies that the pill fails as much as whatever her ‘natural’ method does. I’m no scientist but I’m pretty sure that’s not true.

@anachronistic, you are spot on! Even the most harried mothers I know take joy in the things their kids learn and the cute things they do. Braggie’s all, “Look at me—a Christian Martyr Mother with an army of kids!”

And, yeah, Braggie—everyone has heard of birth control failure—because people tend not to share their stories about how well it works most of the time.

[Tatar-tot]

21 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Exactly. And it was more than once. When it happens once, you keep the door closed. She brags about how well her older kids behave. It wouldn’t be hard to ask them to close the bathroom door behind them so the toddler doesn’t flood the bathroom again. Or you know, she could stop relying on her older kids to parent and put up a baby gate and keep an eye on her toddler.

I say this as someone who utilized baby gates and kept the bathroom door closed all during the toddler stages. I have two boys the age of her twins and Theo.

When my youngest was his age he played in the toilet to know end. We all learned very quickly to keep the freakin’ door closed.  This is not rocket science folks.

[Ozlsn]

34 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

put up a baby gate and keep an eye on her toddler.

I say this as someone who utilized baby gates and kept the bathroom door closed all during the toddler stages. I have two boys the age of her twins and Theo.

Heh, I still have one baby gate up and one in storage in case friends with young children come over (we have stairs from the deck to the yard - it's much less stressful if we know they can't fall down them). 

29 minutes ago, Hane said:

Even the most harried mothers I know take joy in the things their kids learn and the cute things they do. Braggie’s all, “Look at me—a Christian Martyr Mother with an army of kids!”

Yes, totally. Does she post about the kid's achievements in a way that isn't look at how wonderful of a parent I am? Things that are funny, or silly - and silly in a way is more telling, because I don't think Abbie gets silly.

[Ozlsn]

On 4/17/2020 at 4:30 AM, TuringMachine said:

Braggie absolutely believes her children are a reflection of how much Jesus loves her more than everyone else.

And she reflects that love on to them by showing how loved and wanted they are... oh wait.

On 4/17/2020 at 4:41 AM, SuperNova said:

I will have an even 10 (TEN!) kids in no time flat."

If Shaun reads this, well, there are things within his control.

On 4/17/2020 at 5:04 AM, TuringMachine said:

I remember last time she said she really liked Zeal.

Zeal and Zephyr? Zabdiel? Zebedee?

Or would she go more Zeal and Ardor? Or Yakob and Zeal?

I keep reading it as seal, which isn't helping.

[feministxtian]

Back in the dark ages, my house looked like friggin ft. Knox with the damn baby gates. One at the top of the stairs, one at the bottom of the stairs (split level house), one in the kitchen doorway, one across the laundry room (bathroom inside), one in the family room doorway. Was it a pain to latch and unlatch them or risk my neck going over them (short legs)?? Absolutely yes. Did it keep my tribe of hoodlums out of trouble? For the most part. It cut down on the trouble. Did the dogs have fun making like hurdlers? Yup...except for my GSD that could never figure the offset angle downstairs and would run into the wall. 

There was a reason I stopped having kids...love them all dearly but there wasn't enough of me for many more. Maybe I could have had one more...but...nope. Don't regret it for a minute. Crazy in love with the wonderful humans I have. 

#1 son just added to the "mama's crazy" family lore tonight. His wife (who is from Mongolia) was worried that I wouldn't be willing to come help them out when she has the baby, since her parents won't be able to make it to the US from Mongolia and some other stuff like that I wouldn't love the baby as much as my other grandchild. #1 son told her "mom'll hand the baby back to you, go shoot whoever pissed her off and come back and get the baby, sit down and rock her like nothing happened". Something about how far mom would go to defend her family...

[anachronistic]

That picture of Honor is so weird! Most 2 year olds I’ve known would be absolutely delighted to show someone else how they pushed the chair in and accessed the forbidden sink. He looks annoyed to me, like she interrupted him. He certainly isn’t guilty, because he’s 2.  He might be scared or wary of punishment, but I think that guilt implies a level of self awareness that toddlers just don’t have.

If I saw a 2 year old who’d done that, I’d congratulate him on the hard work it took to push the chair all that way. I’d say something like “Wow, you really like water! You really want to play with the taps so badly, and you found a way to get to them! Good for you! But we don’t do water play alone. I will set you up with a bucket on the porch /you can play in the tub after dinner / you clearly love water a lot so I will find a way that you can access it safely and more often.”

Then I’d put a gate across the bathroom or a child lock on the door or otherwise bar the kids access. Not that hard. Sheesh.