M is for Mama 5: Praying for Lunch

[SuperNova]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

8 children! But to be fair, the oldest two don’t act like children.

They're unpaid servants.

[Baxter]

Of course as usual, Abbie is making Valentine's Day all about her. Guess what? Lots of couples with and without kids don't go out on Valentine's Day. Even before my husband and I had kids, we would usually pick another night to go out instead. Less busy and we don't typically like having a set menu as many restaurants seem to do here. When you have kids, they take priority. This year on Valentine's day, I had a laugh with my mom as we were driving around to pick up the decorations and other last minute stuff for my son's birthday party the next day. My husband was home with our baby. That's just what life is like when you have kids. But Abbie will never get that. My husband and I are also done after two kids so we know this is just a moment in time and before we know it, the kids will be grown up. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, Baxter said:

Of course as usual, Abbie is making Valentine's Day all about her. Guess what? Lots of couples with and without kids don't go out on Valentine's Day. Even before my husband and I had kids, we would usually pick another night to go out instead. Less busy and we don't typically like having a set menu as many restaurants seem to do here. When you have kids, they take priority. This year on Valentine's day, I had a laugh with my mom as we were driving around to pick up the decorations and other last minute stuff for my son's birthday party the next day. My husband was home with our baby. That's just what life is like when you have kids. But Abbie will never get that. My husband and I are also done after two kids so we know this is just a moment in time and before we know it, the kids will be grown up. 

Braggie would look at our Valentine’s Day together as quite pathetic. My husband and I didn’t go out. My mother came over for a few hours to see the boys but I didn’t force her to babysit them like Braggie. Then she left and our evening was pretty ordinary. Nothing special at all. 

[AmazonGrace]

I mean, if you want to go out on Valentine's Day but  some dateless grandpa schedules a cow poop event on the 14th February, of course you have to cancel the romantic dinner and go to the cow poop event.

Sorry, I don't make the rules.

[smittykins]

Braggie would hate living near me.  Not only do we sometimes get a faint whiff of “organic fertilizer,” but the county landfill is less than a mile away, and if the wind is blowing right, you can get a snootful of that.

[SuperNova]

38 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Braggie would look at our Valentine’s Day together as quite pathetic. My husband and I didn’t go out. My mother came over for a few hours to see the boys but I didn’t force her to babysit them like Braggie. Then she left and our evening was pretty ordinary. Nothing special at all. 

Mr Nova drove me to get my blood drawn, then we got taquitos, and went grocery shopping. I'm sure that would be considered pathetic by Abbie standards as well. Then again, our husbands aren't constantly trying to dodge us. Ouch.

[Shiny]

I realized the other day that I'm super triggered by people that frame everything in a negative way. I think that's one reason Abbie bugs me more than most. Of course, my optimistic, fuck-it attitude is probably triggering to some as well. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

31 minutes ago, Shiny said:

I realized the other day that I'm super triggered by people that frame everything in a negative way. I think that's one reason Abbie bugs me more than most. Of course, my optimistic, fuck-it attitude is probably triggering to some as well. 

I have to fight my natural inclination to negativity. Therefore I try to surround myself with more positive people. I could never stand to be around Braggie IRL. 

[danvillebelle]

We tend to never do things for holidays on the actual day, other than Christmas.

On Feb. 13th my husband brought me a small bouquet of daises and carnations and a bag of mini-Reese's (YAAASS). 

Our Valentine's "date" was Sunday afternoon.  We spent it wandering around the garden centers at Lowe's and Wal Mart, talking about all our gardening plans, and buying new seed and suet for our bird friends.

When you've been married for nearly 3 decades and you're secure in your love, grand gestures are no longer required.  And fuck what society deems romantic - anything can be romantic when it's done by and with your one and only.

[JanasTattooParlor]

6 hours ago, danvillebelle said:

We tend to never do things for holidays on the actual day, other than Christmas.

On Feb. 13th my husband brought me a small bouquet of daises and carnations and a bag of mini-Reese's (YAAASS). 

Our Valentine's "date" was Sunday afternoon.  We spent it wandering around the garden centers at Lowe's and Wal Mart, talking about all our gardening plans, and buying new seed and suet for our bird friends.

When you've been married for nearly 3 decades and you're secure in your love, grand gestures are no longer required.  And fuck what society deems romantic - anything can be romantic when it's done by and with your one and only.

I love this! I’m getting married in October this year and after 8 years with my fiancé, we do all of our holidays very low key as well. Valentine’s Day for us was a night in making homemade pizzas, drinking wine, and watching a comedy special. I’m not a big celebratory person and I’m a terrible gift giver, so I’m always happy just going to dinner or having some experience instead of a gift. I don’t get people who have to have big gestures, but I also hate attention on myself unlike Braggie. 

[catlady]

Mr. CL and I don't do big celebrations for ourselves either.  we don't even give birthday presents to each other.  someone asked us about this once; and the primary reason is that we give small gifts all year.  one of us will come home on a random Tuesday and say "I saw this on my lunch break and thought you might like it."  or a box from Amazon is on the porch and one of us will say "open it, it's for you."  so we don't need the calendar to tell us when to go shopping for each other.  we generally do takeout on our birthdays so no one has to cook, but that's pretty much it.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I tell my husband he’s lucky because I don’t like gifts. I’m just not much of a “stuff” person. But I do like going out with him. However I refuse to pay 50 bucks for a babysitter for a few hours. I’m not lucky enough to have a mother willing to take 7 kids for a weekend for free.

[mango_fandango]

I have no boyfriend so Valentine’s Day is entirely irrelevant to me. Even if I had a guy, I wouldn’t be super fussed about getting anything (maybe a box of Lindt truffles would be nice, but I wouldn’t mind if that didn’t happen). 

My father was working on Friday evening so my parents weren’t even together, Braggie! Beat that! He wasn’t far away (only in central London) and he didn’t come home late, but it was still just my mum and I most of the time. 
 

Incidentally, a local supermarket was selling toy penguins before Valentine’s Day. It made me think of the Arndts. 

[theotherelise]

I run a couple of events for students as part of my job (and a bunch of other events too). Braggie is totally one of those kinds of people who make me hate the event planning part of my job. 

Imagine coordinating an event time with  judges, volunteers, and room reservations. You put it on a Friday to be more accommodating since you know people might be traveling for it. and then you hear feedback that you should have avoided Valentine’s Day, an arbitrary date on the calendar which has no religious limitations. Yeah, no.

I don’t think it magically makes life perfect, and certainly doesn’t erase my anxiety disorder, but the science behind positivity and gratefulness is super compelling.

Braggie has a seriously privileged life. But everything is so #hard because she focuses on anything that isn’t exactly how she wants it. 

[SassyPants]

5 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I tell my husband he’s lucky because I don’t like gifts. I’m just not much of a “stuff” person. But I do like going out with him. However I refuse to pay 50 bucks for a babysitter for a few hours. I’m not lucky enough to have a mother willing to take 7 kids for a weekend for free.

Not A WEEKEND, but EVERY weekend!

[JermajestyDuggar]

Motherhood sure is sanctifying for Braggie. Since she hates it so much. 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

OMG, I cannot with this whiny little princess!

ETA: Here’s a tip, give your kids a fucking age-appropriate task to do.  Why is your toddler around your cutting knife and why is your 5yo trying to open a jar? Maybe it wouldn’t take as long if you put a little thought into it first.

But I forgot, then it wouldn’t be as ‘sanctifying’.

Edited February 19, 2020 by Snarkasarus Rex

[SuperNova]

4 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

OMG, I cannot with this whiny little princess!

ETA: Here’s a tip, give your kids a fucking age-appropriate task to do.  Why is your toddler around your cutting knife and why is your 5yo trying to open a jar? Maybe it wouldn’t take as long if you put a little thought into it first.

But I forgot, then it wouldn’t be as ‘sanctifying’.

But then what would she complain about?! How will the world know her sacrifice? She couldn't lord it over moms if didn't constantly bring it up. 

Abbie is so full of shit. I don't believe for one second that she didn't mean #motherhoodissanctifying as a declaration of superior holiness. She got called out so she backpedaled, as evidenced by her overexplanatory explanation. It would've been a whole lot easier to say, I'm sorry if anyone misunderstood, and then give her personal meaning. She chose instead to turn it into a preachy lesson and still didn't bother to give the biblical support behind the phrase. And if there was any doubt to her insincerity, she adds making dinner with her children onto the same sanctifying list as joblessness, infertility, and other devastating life situations. Seriously, Abbie can get fucked sideways by her fiddleleaf fig tree.

Edited February 19, 2020 by SuperNova

[danvillebelle]

Christ on a cracker...people who have to put a religious spin on EVERY SINGLE FUCKING MOMENT OF LIFE make me want to puke and solidify my position that I am done with religion.  "My totally normal kids annoyed me in totally normal ways....I AM BECOMING HOLY!"  

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, danvillebelle said:

Christ on a cracker...people who have to put a religious spin on EVERY SINGLE FUCKING MOMENT OF LIFE make me want to puke and solidify my position that I am done with religion.  "My totally normal kids annoyed me in totally normal ways....I AM BECOMING HOLY!"  

Even when I was a Christian, I never thought like this. I think Braggie is the fundie I said probably thinks God is with her when she poops. Because God has nothing better to do than sanctify her through her colon. #poopingissanctifying

[danvillebelle]

17 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Even when I was a Christian, I never thought like this.

Me neither.  I always thought more along the lines of Gandhi's friend Charlie Andrews - in the film he says in response to Gandhi's "I thought you were a man of God" with "I am, but I'm not so egotistical as to think he plans his day around my dilemmas." 

[AmazonGrace]

I don't think becoming a whiny martyr means you're sanctified. The holy kind of martyrs seemed to have a different attitude.

[TuringMachine]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Even when I was a Christian, I never thought like this. I think Braggie is the fundie I said probably thinks God is with her when she poops. Because God has nothing better to do than sanctify her through her colon. #poopingissanctifying

You did! I suggested "Jesus died for my bowel movements" as a post count title because of you.

[catlady]

if Abbie had two ounces of brain cells, she would give the 3yo and 5yo each a bowl of half a cup of dried cheerios and a wooden spoon, and say "your job for dinner prep is to stir this."  hell, even give them a plastic measuring cup, point out the line, and let them measure it themselves.  park them at the kitchen island, and they will think they are helping.  oh wait, they will spill dry cereal on Abbie's pristine floor; bad idea.   s/

[JermajestyDuggar]

17 minutes ago, catlady said:

if Abbie had two ounces of brain cells, she would give the 3yo and 5yo each a bowl of half a cup of dried cheerios and a wooden spoon, and say "your job for dinner prep is to stir this."  hell, even give them a plastic measuring cup, point out the line, and let them measure it themselves.  park them at the kitchen island, and they will think they are helping.  oh wait, they will spill dry cereal on Abbie's pristine floor; bad idea.   s/

I honestly don’t know why it bothers her since Simon or Ezra will clean it up.