Andrea Mills 3: Still Buying Junk Food

[Giraffe]

28 minutes ago, raspberrymint said:

Do you think Tom would allow Mileena to move in with his second family?

(I don't think even suicidal ideation can change certain people's minds, unless it's their own.  Even then, they can often rationalize it away with the threat of displeasing God.)

Personally I’m not comfortable doing any speculating about Mileena. She didn’t ask to be dragged into Tom’s snark. 

As for Tom, he is proving himself a douchebag of the highest order and I hope he gets professional help very soon!

[kesmom]

I also believe that his older daughter should not be discussed here. 

[Olivia Marie]

Tom is a douche of the lowest degree.     The pathetic truth is that he will never seek counseling.  I care nothing about him. I do not care.  I do, however, care about the well being of the nine innocent children.   Even before Andrea passed away, he proved over and over again what a deadbeat Dad he was/is.   He is a narcissistic jerk.   He does not care about the children.  Even though the children lost the only person in the world they could count upon, he does not care.  He only cares about himself, and that will never change.  They are all on their own.  Except for the fact that they all live in their family home, I consider them orphans.     

Tom’s behavior is reprehensible and unacceptable.   His adoring  female skank subs are furthering his despicable behavior even more, as if he isn’t bad enough all on his own.   They are Enablers.   He LOVES their attention and adoration   

Andrea enabled Tom as well.  She absolutely kissed the very ground he walked upon, and he knew it.   Even though he never had to be a Dad, cook, etc....it does not take a rocket scientist to know how to care for the basic human needs of children.  #1 is Love.   Kindness, concern, compassion, food, personal hygiene, clean house and clothes.  The list is endless.  It is all common sense, and out of love and concern for your very own flesh and blood.  He.Is.Useless!  If he would have gone first, the children would have been okay....but now they are not.  

One of his feeble and reoccurring excuses is that he does not have enough time.  I throw the BS flag on every word that comes out of his mouth.  Number one, he is at home the majority of the time.  Maybe in the basement, but he is still home.  He does not have a normal job, a regular job.  

Instead of blithering on about woe is me to his slobbering fans on Youtube and Facebook.........**Put fresh veggies and meat/poultry in a crockpot, done.   Soups, stew, beans, veggie soup, sloppy joes, mac/cheese....everything can be very easily be prepared in a crock pot.   Even baked goods.    Nothing easier.  You do not have to be a cook.  ** Baths at the very least every other day.  ** Clean clothes for the children every day.   **Fresh fruits and veggies for the kids to snack on.   **individual attention  with each child, as well as a family....without Youtube   **Clean bodies, and in clean jammies before bedtime, especially the little ones.  ** Clean towels and sheets.   **Quiet story time before bedtime.  **Tucked into bed, with love,  with a cozy blanket and/or special cuddly toy.  You NEVER throw a little one into bed in dirty dresses she may have already worn for days on end....and wet after having an accident on the table.  Then giving her a sandwich, glass of milk, shut the door, and left to cry in desperation.  I just cannot bear it. 

I apologize for the the lenthy rant   Before I close this book, just a few things that haunt me.   Tom has never been to visit Andrea’s resting place.   I realize we all handle death and grief differently.   I do, however, find it strange that he has not been there one single time   At least ask the children.   Maybe they wouldn’t want to go and that’s okay, but give them the opportunity for private time there if they desire.   As heartbreaking and difficult as it is, for some people it helps a little to be able to visit and pour their hearts out.   I’m one of those people.   For the children, their Mommy died,  buried, gone.  No love, no guidance, no compassion.  TOM’S theory..they are children, they are all doing fine.....but I’m not doing fine.  Me me me, what about me.   One more thing I don’t understand, and have grappled with.   It ripped my heart out to watch the children all sitting in a row at their Mommie’s service, with no one comforting then, holding their hands, having a loving arm around them. Maybe that’s the way Tom wanted it...”Look at me, all alone with nine children.”   Sorry, in my book he is a bastard.    I could not even spot Tom’s Mom at the service  

 

 

 

Edited November 3, 2019 by Olivia Marie

[Saywha?]

The kids are all sick and feeling rotten in the current video and all I can think is please lord let them have medicine! Not herbs!

[can'tstopwatching]

5 minutes ago, Saywha? said:

The kids are all sick and feeling rotten in the current video and all I can think is please lord let them have medicine! Not herbs!

I'd like to know what Tom will be doing about sickness etc. now, he doesn't know anything about the herbs and didn't seem to plan on learning (I wouldn't, either). I'm sure he's trying to figure this out now himself. I could definitely see him giving them cold medicine but I feel like he still might be resistant to going to the doctor unless they *have* to.

[Renee]

In today's live, poor Sophia's hair is so tangled and matted. I know with little girls with long hair that's a constant battle, but it shows no one has combed out her hair today. Presumably they had church. People were over. Couldn't someone take the time with her to keep her hair looking nice?

[mollysmom]

1 minute ago, Renee said:

In today's live, poor Sophia's hair is so tangled and matted. I know with little girls with long hair that's a constant battle, but it shows no one has combed out her hair today. Presumably they had church. People were over. Couldn't someone take the time with her to keep her hair looking nice?

He did mention that they cancelled church today because the kids are sick...

[Renee]

31 minutes ago, mollysmom said:

He did mention that they cancelled church today because the kids are sick...

Sorry, I didn't listen to all of it.

[mollysmom]

Just now, Renee said:

Sorry, I didn't listen to all of it.

I don't blame you one bit!!!! lol

[WhatAlife]

Imagine if someone sent them a bowl of juicy clementines.... I bet they would devour them in minutes! ?

[Saywha?]

42 minutes ago, WhatAlife said:

Imagine if someone sent them a bowl of juicy clementines.... I bet they would devour them in minutes! ?

Would probably greatly help their colds too! 

[louannems]

4 hours ago, mollysmom said:

I don't blame you one bit!!!! lol

Actually, today's video was kind of interesting.  The whole video was Tom opening packages from The You Tube People.  Most of it was individual Halloween cards and trick or treat bags for each child.  Really nice stuff and not much candy this time.

Lots of cute dresses, including some really adorable homemade ones, for Claudia and Sophia. A hoodie for Eden.  Walkie talkies for Solomon. A cool hollogen key chain with Andrea in it. Hanna loved it and got excited and said Mama many times.  Also, someone made a collage blanket with lots of video stills of Andrea.

Someone sent Tom a book on grieving.  He said he would read it, even though it was a big book.  He said he'd read other grieving books others had sent.

Tom mentioned that he never brushed the little girls' hair today.  At least Eden doesn't seem to be expected to pick up the slack.

One thing I've noticed ever since Andrea's death is that Claudia is in pull-ups.  Many months before her death, Andrea had done a video on potty training Claudia and she was completely trained.  I know it's perfectly normal for kids to digress after a severe trauma but I hope Tom just doesn't want to deal with reminding Claudia to use the bathroom and just put her in the pull-ups.

[luv2laugh]

Tom doesn’t enjoy being a parent but this is all his fault because he could have used birth control.

[Queen Of Hearts]

I truly don't get the 'live unbxing of grifted goodies' videos.  Who actually enjoys watching these besides the handful of leg humpers who are sending presents?  Tom is providing no useful content to anyone regarding large family life the way Andrea did and yet people keep watching. I don't get it.

I will give him credit where credit is due regarding the bible study videos.  It is a unique niche and fills a need for many people.  Plus, it is something he can do without exploiting his family.  Wish he'd focus on that instead of endless videos of him grifting of whining for the camera while ignoring his kids.  

[HeadacheLife]

15 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

Tom doesn’t enjoy being a parent but this is all his fault because he could have used birth control.

That's not entirely fair. She's not here, but it does take two to tango - she was always pushing for more children.  I'm sure he couldn't have predicted her untimely passing.   I do agree though, the guy is miserable.  I still think he'll get married sooner rather than later.  I can't see him being able to tolerate the situation for the long term. I know he's grieving, but he seems genuinely depressed. 

2 hours ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

I truly don't get the 'live unbxing of grifted goodies' videos.  Who actually enjoys watching these besides the handful of leg humpers who are sending presents?  Tom is providing no useful content to anyone regarding large family life the way Andrea did and yet people keep watching. I don't get it.
 

I am so tired of the grifting.  Its nice for the kids, but this is setting them up for disappointment in the long run. Eventually people will wise-up.  I never minded seeing it on birthday videos, but this is getting a bit much.  I can't imagine what Christmas is going to be like. 

[Alisamer]

23 hours ago, Olivia Marie said:

One of his feeble and reoccurring excuses is that he does not have enough time.

 

30 minutes ago, HeadacheLife said:

I know he's grieving, but he seems genuinely depressed. 

i think these two things go together. When you are depressed (like really, actually diagnosed depressed), you "don't have time" for anything. No matter how easy, quick or simple a thing is, when you are depressed it might as well be an expedition into the wilderness. You say "I don't have time" because everyone nods sympathetically to that - there's no such thing as "enough time" really. But the truth is you don't have enough energy. You don't have enough motivation. You know, in your head, that most basic things take very little time. But you kind of get "stuck" doing whatever you're doing, and just can't make yourself get stuff done, even setting alarms and reminders. Even your sleep schedule can get messed up, because you have to change clothes and brush teeth,  before sleeping etc... and sometimes that feels like climbing a cliff even though you know full well it takes less than 5 minutes of time.  It's frustrating, and near impossible to ask for help because it's all your own fault and you know it is.

If he's really depressed, he needs treatment and help. If it was just him, it'd be kind of understandable. But he has a ton of young kids all dependent on him, who can't wait for him to recover. Any sympathy I might have for him has been taken by the kids. Depressed or not, those kids need more than he's giving them, and he needs to fight through and get help if he needs it.

[AliceInFundyland]

From everything I understand about his flavor of Jesus, he doesn't have the verbiage to put words to the concepts of mental health care and depression.

Prayer and Bible studies aren't working. All the gifts and you tubers are a balm on his wounds.

It's so hard to do all this stuff when you have the words. He needs someone to intervene. I hope that happens.

(spoken as a person trying to hoist her loneself from the 'darkest place' day by day, one task at a time, with all the stupid knowledge and words)

Edited November 4, 2019 by AliceInFundyland

[thesedays]

First-time poster here.  I stumbled onto this family on You Tube just a few evenings ago, and in the meantime found this website.

This family sounded like a total trainwreck even before they lost their mom.  Do they have ANY real-life support?  I get the impression they don't.  

[moreorlessnu]

On 11/3/2019 at 5:45 PM, Renee said:

In today's live, poor Sophia's hair is so tangled and matted. I know with little girls with long hair that's a constant battle, but it shows no one has combed out her hair today. Presumably they had church. People were over. Couldn't someone take the time with her to keep her hair looking nice?

In the video of Hannah's birth, Andrea is sitting in bed with Hannah. She beckons Sophia over to the bed so she can comb and fix her hair. Andrea had just given birth; a 3 second ponytail for Sophia would have been above and beyond what was expected. Instead Sophia walked away with 2 neat little side braids that joined together in the back in a ponytail. 

[WhatAlife]

1 hour ago, thesedays said:

First-time poster here.  I stumbled onto this family on You Tube just a few evenings ago, and in the meantime found this website.

This family sounded like a total trainwreck even before they lost their mom.  Do they have ANY real-life support?  I get the impression they don't.  

Hi and welcome, I’m a newbie myself. They have Toms mom who lives nearby and helps as well as Andrea’s sister. They have also have other relatives nearby including a grandpa with questionable police records 

[under siege]

10 hours ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

I truly don't get the 'live unbxing of grifted goodies' videos.  Who actually enjoys watching these besides the handful of leg humpers who are sending presents?  Tom is providing no useful content to anyone regarding large family life the way Andrea did and yet people keep watching. I don't get it.

I will give him credit where credit is due regarding the bible study videos.  It is a unique niche and fills a need for many people.  Plus, it is something he can do without exploiting his family.  Wish he'd focus on that instead of endless videos of him grifting of whining for the camera while ignoring his kids.  

Unboxing videos are surprisingly extremely popular on youtube. In general, the more organized, calmer, slow-paced ones get the most views / more 'liked'.
That alone would give Tom reason to continue with them. Even though his style of unboxing is nothing like slow-paced, calm or organized (although that last one has improved since his or Rachel's reading gossip sites for tips)
That and the fact he has enough leg-humpers to verify his belief that all his you-tube people love to see his grifing rewards.

By Tom adding 'unboxing' to the titles it will attract people that follow those types of videos not just his regular youtube people.

One positive thing that Andrea did and Tom lacks, is the art of sounding sincere and/or surprised when people send things to her and the kids for Birthdays, Holidays, and just because. 
Tom has yet to perfect the art of not sounding like a douche. His 'I don't need anything but you could send xyx' takes away any sincerity he can muster up.

[thesedays]

I saw a video where she explained how she fit 5 boys into a single bedroom.  I did like the sleeping cubicles so they could have their own space (as a tween, I not only shared a room with my sister, who's 7 years younger, but also a bed, and we both hated that) but that speaker with the voice reading the Bible all the time?  One of these days, one or more of the kids are going to tear those down and smash them.

 

This whole Quiverfull movement reminds me of stories from a couple generations ago about the old-fashioned huge Catholic families, which were also rarely happy homes.  Their "poverty" was not because of the family's size as much as it was the "father" drinking and/or gambling away his paycheck, and the mother accepting this as her lot in life until the 1960s, when the divorce rate for these couples approached 100% in some areas.

[under siege]

 

 

 

1

8 minutes ago, thesedays said:

This whole Quiverfull movement reminds me of stories from a couple generations ago about the old-fashioned huge Catholic families, which were also rarely happy homes.  Their "poverty" was not because of the family's size as much as it was the "father" drinking and/or gambling away his paycheck, and the mother accepting this as her lot in life until the 1960s, when the divorce rate for these couples approached 100% in some areas.

You've summed up my hometown. Lot's of large Catholic families. My best friend included. Overnight stays at her house were an eye-opener. The father had a good job but the mother had to make do with very little due to his drinking, smoking and weekend benders.
Divorce wasn't an option so very dysfunctional families for generations until either divorce was kind of acceptable or fewer children because younger generation couples didn't want to continue the repeated disfunction.
I'm so grateful that my parents didn't force their religion on to my siblings and I. Both came from large families themselves and neither wanted what they had for their own children.

[Olivia Marie]

I just watched Tom’s two most recent videos, opening packages.  When that gift train slows down the children are going to be very disappointed.   

It’s absolutely ridiculous that Tom can’t  take a few minutes to comb Claudia and Sophia’s hair.  They look like little homeless girls.  It made me sad.   I understand it’s against his beliefs, but it would be better for the little girls to have a cute short hairdo.  At least ask Andrea’s sister if she would put their hair in braids.   

In one of the videos it sounded like a TB ward in their living room.  They are all sick.

Their house is like Willie Wonka’s Chocolate Factory.   Candy to them is like winning the lottery.   A sub sent a box with candy from around the world.   Seriously?!?   That was not cheap, and serves no purpose.   Another sub sent money for each of the kids.   Tom said they could buy candy when they go to the local store this week.   For goodness sakes, have a huge bowl on the table of apples, bananas, Little Cuties.   In the frig have carrot sticks/baby carrots, other veggies   The kids would gobble those things up.   Tom and Thomas have huge stomachs.  I am not making fun of them, it is just so over-the-top unhealthy, and dangerous.   Thomas is too darn young to have his gut hanging way over his belt.   

Someone sent a blanket for Hannah.   It had pictures of Andrea all over it.   It brought me to tears hearing the three little girls say “Mama” repeatedly.   I hope Tom lets Hannah carry it with her, and cuddle in her bed.

One thing a little different in the videos, Tom seemed relaxed, and even happy.   Please don’t throw rocks, but it made me wonder if he might be communicating with a female.  He received messages and texted back 3-4 times.  In the second video “Part 2”, I noticed something that made me wonder even more.    At 15:46 he received a text, responded back, and then looked up and directly into the camera.   He had a very contented look on his face, as if he were doing that for someone.   He did the same thing again not too long after that.   Maybe I’m way off and just looking for it.   I just feel he will be married within the year.   He was already mentioning it when Andrea was still in the hospital   She hasn’t even been gone three months yet.   He’s selfish, self-centered, and he wants someone to do EVERYTHING, so he can return to his single life of playing games and fixing a few PCs in his basement.   Good luck to the chick who wants to be with that poor excuse for a man.   Rachel Day is married, but it will have to be a loser like her.   Oh yes, there was a package from Rachel as well.    The kids seem to know her name well.  

The second time Tom looks up into the camera is around 16:31   

 

 

Edited November 5, 2019 by Olivia Marie

[Olivia Marie]

58 minutes ago, thesedays said:

I saw a video where she explained how she fit 5 boys into a single bedroom.  I did like the sleeping cubicles so they could have their own space (as a tween, I not only shared a room with my sister, who's 7 years younger, but also a bed, and we both hated that) but that speaker with the voice reading the Bible all the time?  One of these days, one or more of the kids are going to tear those down and smash them.

 

This whole Quiverfull movement reminds me of stories from a couple generations ago about the old-fashioned huge Catholic families, which were also rarely happy homes.  Their "poverty" was not because of the family's size as much as it was the "father" drinking and/or gambling away his paycheck, and the mother accepting this as her lot in life until the 1960s, when the divorce rate for these couples approached 100% in some areas.

The Bible playing 24/7 is a form of torture, in my opinion.   Anything playing 24/7 is just cruel.   It is not normal.    Those poor children.   They are so programmed.   They have not been allowed to have thoughts of their own.  They’ve never had the joy of even selecting what they want to wear.  It’s very sad.  Add to that they have the poorest nutrition, hygiene, have never been to a dentist, and most likely very rarely a doctor.  

There were two of the families you talked about in my neighborhood.   We always felt so bad for the children.

 

Edited November 5, 2019 by Olivia Marie