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Gwen Shamblin Lara 10: Hanging onto the Wine


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6 hours ago, formergothardite said:

Gwen says she loves coconut, eating it and putting it on her body. Joe says she calls him coconut. 

 

Lmao ? At least he is trying to keep his spirits up

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My 7 year old is picky as hell but he gets so damn excited about food. Especially desserts. My non-picky eater gets excited over strawberries! And many other foods. He just loves food in general. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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1 hour ago, formergothardite said:

Joe isn't dumb, I suspect he will make sure he walks out of that marriage with enough money to live comfortable. 

I don't think Joe just wants live comfortably. He wants everything Gwen has to offer. Joe likes the level of luxurious wealth that staying with Gwen gives him. Gwen knows that another divorce would reflect badly on her brand and would probably allow Joe most anything to keep him and he knows it. Even if he has been saving money, there's probably a pre-nup that would cap his alimony payments so he wouldn't be able to maintain at quite the same level. After the last divorce that Gwen went through I doubt she would go into another marriage without protecting her assets. It's to both of their advantage to stay together.

Separate from the financial gains, I also think that Joe is an incredibly vain man that needs as much adoration as Gwen does. Joe's career wasn't exactly thriving before he met Gwen. His acting gigs had dried up and he was pursuing a music career without much success. Then he meets Gwen who has money and a captive audience just waiting to adore him. He gets to stay in front of a camera indefinitely. All he's had to do is learn the bible like he once learned a script.

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7 hours ago, formergothardite said:

 Gwen says she loves coconut, eating it and putting it on her body. Joe says she calls him coconut. Gwen actually manages to look a bit embarrassed at that comment.

 

Gwen likes hairy brown balls that you can get milky white liquid out of. 

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3 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

Gwen likes hairy brown balls that you can get milky white liquid out of. 

I have NEVER been happier to have a severe coconut intolerance! :puke-huge:

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9 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

Gwen likes hairy brown balls that you can get milky white liquid out of. 

You and Gwen are ruining coconuts for me. :brainbleach:

Edited by formergothardite
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8 hours ago, Howl said:

I was ALMOST curious enough to click on that video....almost.  But I guess I've internalized Gwen; I heard a voice say, "Musn't" so I didn't. 

If you had watched the video you would have heard all about their touristy visit and zero mention of the Category 5 hurricane that just happened there. Such smug morons, Joe thanked tbe "Bohemian" people at the end... I guess for giving him the time of day. Bahamians actually are totally cool. 

Edited by NarcissismKills
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2 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Gwen likes hairy brown balls that you can get milky white liquid out of. 

WHY WHY WHY

:brainbleach::brainbleach::brainbleach:

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I watched parts of the last 3 videos. I have to say that I have more chemistry with my neighbor (our kids are great friends and we coach battle of the books together) than Gwen and Joe, who are married. wow 

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8 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

I watched parts of the last 3 videos. I have to say that I have more chemistry with my neighbor (our kids are great friends and we coach battle of the books together) than Gwen and Joe, who are married. wow 

I bet we could find two strangers in Walmart who have more chemistry than these two. The weird oversharing of sex stuff just makes it look like they are trying too hard. Happy couples don't feel obligated to make a huge show about how they absolutely have sex. I'm more convinced now that they don't have sex than I was before they started this. 

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Gwen thinks she's done with sin because she's thin. Eating is the only sin that matters to her.

Spoiler

 

You CAN Be Done With Sin

December 06, 2019

by Gwen Shamblin Lara

0 Comment

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.
1 Peter 4:1-2

Peter, who had failed Christ at one time, held the keys to the Kingdom when he wrote the words of these verses. Just as there were early skeptics who thought pioneer aviators could not overcome the earth’s gravity, skeptics today do not believe that you can be done with sin, even though this scripture tells you that you can. The skeptics say that you are wasting your time, you are arrogant, and you are dreaming. When you fall down, they gloat and mock, saying, “Well, what is the matter? I thought you could overcome sin.” Skeptics exist inside AND outside the church building, and some even live with you. They will say, “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic,” or “Once you become obese, you will just have to ‘watch it’ for the rest of your life.”

But re-read Peter’s statement above. Is this not one of the most exciting things you have ever read? I have broken free of the refrigerator’s magnetism, and it no longer exerts a gravitational pull on me. I am flying, and you can, too. Let’s imitate the pioneer pilots who reached their goals by setting their minds on what was NOT seen (their dreams of flying) rather than on what WAS seen (their skeptics and the early, inevitable failures). Sin is a rebellious attitude that does not want to submit. But the exciting truth is that you have everything you need to turn it around and be DONE WITH SIN! You can do it!

 

 

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1 hour ago, AmazonGrace said:

Gwen thinks she's done with sin because she's thin. Eating is the only sin that matters to her.

  Hide contents

 

You CAN Be Done With Sin

December 06, 2019

by Gwen Shamblin Lara

0 Comment

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.
1 Peter 4:1-2

Peter, who had failed Christ at one time, held the keys to the Kingdom when he wrote the words of these verses. Just as there were early skeptics who thought pioneer aviators could not overcome the earth’s gravity, skeptics today do not believe that you can be done with sin, even though this scripture tells you that you can. The skeptics say that you are wasting your time, you are arrogant, and you are dreaming. When you fall down, they gloat and mock, saying, “Well, what is the matter? I thought you could overcome sin.” Skeptics exist inside AND outside the church building, and some even live with you. They will say, “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic,” or “Once you become obese, you will just have to ‘watch it’ for the rest of your life.”

But re-read Peter’s statement above. Is this not one of the most exciting things you have ever read? I have broken free of the refrigerator’s magnetism, and it no longer exerts a gravitational pull on me. I am flying, and you can, too. Let’s imitate the pioneer pilots who reached their goals by setting their minds on what was NOT seen (their dreams of flying) rather than on what WAS seen (their skeptics and the early, inevitable failures). Sin is a rebellious attitude that does not want to submit. But the exciting truth is that you have everything you need to turn it around and be DONE WITH SIN! You can do it!

 

 

This Gwen Shamblin Lara "devotional" is shocking. Her smug pride and vanity shows how much she loves her rotten self. Pride goeth before a fall. In the interest of saving family members trapped in her cult, I hope her fall happens sooner rather than later. 

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7 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

I have broken free of the refrigerator’s magnetism, and it no longer exerts a gravitational pull on me.

This is one of my favorite Gwenisms. I like to imagine that Gwen's giant head is magnetized and gets stuck to the side of the fridge until Joe finds her and breaks her free. 

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2 hours ago, SuperNova said:

This is one of my favorite Gwenisms. I like to imagine that Gwen's giant head is magnetized and gets stuck to the side of the fridge until Joe finds her and breaks her free. 

 

Not to mention that she's mixing her metaphors.

Quote

I have broken free of the refrigerator’s magnetism, and it no longer exerts a gravitational pull on me.

 

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23 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Gwen likes hairy brown balls that you can get milky white liquid out of. 

*Clutches pearls while sinking onto couch. Fans self.*

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Gather around my fellow FJrites as we spend Friday night with Gwen and Joe. Bring your own snacks and drinks. I'm personally eating chocolate chip almond milk ice cream. No my stomach did not growl. I just wanted it. 

~I'm shocked Gwen didn't make Joe wear something red. They tend to match pretty closely. Today's topic is how men are supposed to protect women and children. 

~Gwen is showing us she won't take our advice! She put the spinning back in the introduction. I do think she cut out a couple of the spins, though. 

~Joe says that boys are taught that when they grow up they get to be the man of the house. Keeper of the gate. Stuff like that. 

~While he is talking a clip of Elizabeth decked out in black and her children in all white hugging her husband is played. 

~Then Elizabeth walking with her husband. Still wearing all black. She looks so scary skinny. I'm surprised they are featuring her this much. 

~That giant wooden horse in Elizabeth's living room probably costs more than my car. 

~Joe drones on about how men want to provide for and protect their wife and kids. How men want to shield his family from danger. Men doing this is important. 

~Gwen is clutching his arm but she does not have that fundie gaze at your husband look down yet. She just kind of looks annoyed that he is talking and she isn't. 

~Gwen's speaks now. Her hair is especially bad today. She says God passed down His protection genes to men. 

~When Gwen is talking Joe stares off into the distance like he is facing death. He seriously looks like he is sad. 

~Joe holds Gwen's hand when she walks down stairs(insert lots of clips of Gwen walking down stairs) so she won't fall. It is how he protects her. Maybe she should not teeter around in shoes that put her at risk of falling down stairs. Be happy with the height God gave her. 

~Joe makes sure Gwen gets into the car safely. Is getting into a car dangerous? 

~OMG Guys!! Around the 2:25 mark a clip of Joe flying Gwen around is shown. In it, for a brief second, the sun shines through Gwen's hair and the gap between her actual scalp and that mess of a wig is shown. How the hell is that thing kept on her head?! I really want to know how her hair works. 

~It gives Joe a tremendous sense of purpose to know Gwen is safe. Clips of Joe locking doors and windows is shown. 

~Clips of military camps while Gwen says he has friends there. He really likes being around those type of guys(not enough to enlist) because they have a sheepdog mentality.

~The Bible says to be good soldiers for your family. 

~Joe reads bunches of verses. 

~Repeat of the same clips of Joe locking doors and windows. 

~Gwen casually drops that her house was built in 1832. 

~Weird joke between Gwen and Joe where he says he heard a bump in the night and sends Gwen to look. It isn't funny. 

~When Joe goes out he is constantly looking for danger. He only sits at restaurants where he can see the door. Joe is beginning to sound paranoid. 

~Joe also protects Gwen's heart. 

~Clips of their wedding now. 

~If the dark forces ever manifest against them Joe vows to never stand behind her because he will be in front of her. God has put it on Joe to protect Gwen's holy message. This is so, so cult like. 

~Oh Rufus help us. More clips of Joe chasing Gwen around in a way we don't want to see. NO ONE NEEDS TO SEE THIS GWEN AND JOE!!!!!!!!!!!

~9:48. Joe is talking about how the men in RF are so godly there is a clip of a man walking in the door and his wife, dressed in a nice dress, heals and peals along with his daughters also very dressed up run to hug him in the most creepy way. They really don't know how insane this looks to the rest of us, do they? 

~They end with Joe twirling Gwen. That has to be an FU to FJ. 

Now the outtakes, Please no sex stuff. 

~Joe "forgetting" to help Gwen out of the car and then making creepy eyes when he does. 

~Joe marching around the kitchen pretending like he has a gun and Gwen says this is what he does around her bed at night. 

~It ends with a close up of Joe's eyes that scream he is dead inside. 

Spoiler

 

 

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2 hours ago, formergothardite said:

~While he is talking a clip of Elizabeth decked out in black and her children in all white hugging her husband is played. 

~Then Elizabeth walking with her husband. Still wearing all black. She looks so scary skinny. I'm surprised they are featuring her this much. 

The footage of Elizabeth's family is several years old. Look at the oldest kid (Grace) and the youngest (the little boy, I can't remember his name). They are clearly older than that now. So Elizabeth may be even thinner now.

Edited by ManyGoats
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I’m sorryyyyy.  In the video, Joe was naming military bases like he has anything to do with them.  He’s putting is hand holding chivalry on the same level of military bravery.  Fudge that noise.  What a chump.

 

 

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     You may have thought Gwod uses you to get attention but that is blasphemous and you won't get to heaven. 

Spoiler

 

Overdue Appreciation

December 07, 2019

by Gwen Shamblin Lara

Comments are off

Stand up and praise the LORD your God, who is from everlasting to everlasting. Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all blessing and praise. You alone are the LORD. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you.”
Nehemiah 9:5-6

Our Father has created your very life and then gives over and above to fill your life with all you need. May we never give Him one second of grief by ever thinking that He gave us life so that he could have attention or use people to wait on Him or get praise from people for prideful or selfish reasons. Satan will whisper that God is using you and that you are being taken advantage of or not getting your fair share in life. That sinful attitude will never enter the gates of heaven. But the opposite is true: YOU have been taking advantage of GOD, of Christ, of God’s Spirit and His Kingdom and His Church. You are the one using God. In fact, we have all not only used God, but we’ve used Him while giving our true love and passion to other gods on this earth! No more. Fill your heart and mind today with long-overdue appreciation for our loving Father, and fill your thoughts with praise for our God who continues to provide everything we need for life and godliness, peace and joy!

 

Comments are off now, to prove that Gwod wants no attention (nobody used to comment anyway)

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1 hour ago, AmazonGrace said:

t, we have all not only used God, but we’ve used Him while giving our true love and passion to other gods on this earth!

Says the person living in a massive house and who only wears the most expensive clothing. But don't dare complain when she asks you to give up everything for her, that would be a sin. :pb_rollseyes:

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12 hours ago, ManyGoats said:

 

Not to mention that she's mixing her metaphors.

 

Reminds me of a commercial for diet pills in the 70’s showing a woman being pulled to a refrigerator(which happens to contain cake)in the middle of the night as if by a magnet.

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Joe holds her hand on the stairs? That reminds me of Queen Victoria’s childhood. She was never allowed to use the stairs without someone holding her hand. She was completely overprotected during her childhood. Now Gwen as an adult is proud to be overprotected by her husband? Weird. 

Also if her home was built in 1832 in Tennessee, wouldnt there be a good chance it was built by slaves? I don’t know if I would be proud of the year it was built if that was the history. 

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Joe holds her hand on the stairs? That reminds me of Queen Victoria’s childhood. She was never allowed to use the stairs without someone holding her hand. She was completely overprotected during her childhood. Now Gwen as an adult is proud to be overprotected by her husband? Weird. 

 

 

My guess is that the reasoning is more about her being an ultra-thin woman in her mid-sixties wearing ridiculously high heels. The potential for an accident with severe injuries is high. Can’t risk the gravy train.

 

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Satan will whisper that God is using you and that you are being taken advantage of or not getting your fair share in life.

I have never in my life thought this nor have I ever heard anyone express this. Have any of you??

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On 12/7/2019 at 12:10 PM, formergothardite said:

She says God passed down His protection genes to men.

Gwen WTAF are you on? God doesn't "pass down his genes" to anyone. Virgin birth, created from dust, created from ribs. Read the actual Bible and learn the stories, sheesh.

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