Carlin, Evan, and Layla Rae 7: Grifter in Utero

[lumpentheologie]

On 10/29/2019 at 5:08 PM, nausicaa said:

(Also, before Free Jinger, I didn't realize most Europeans don't do showers and am still tickled by how bizarre non-North Americans find them, since they are such a fact of life in my social circle. I want to introduce you all to the glory of diaper and dishtowel cakes but am afraid of scaring you. ?)

This is interesting to me because I'm American and I hardly know anyone that did either a wedding shower or a baby shower.  I've never been to a baby shower and went to one wedding shower and it was super awkward to watch a colleague of mine get handed all kinds of sexy gifts in front of her mother.  

Maybe because most of the people I know have relocated several times and so they're pretty far from most of their friends and family?  You can expect people to travel for a wedding, but not really for showers. 

[nausicaa]

2 hours ago, lumpentheologie said:

This is interesting to me because I'm American and I hardly know anyone that did either a wedding shower or a baby shower.  I've never been to a baby shower and went to one wedding shower and it was super awkward to watch a colleague of mine get handed all kinds of sexy gifts in front of her mother.  

Maybe because most of the people I know have relocated several times and so they're pretty far from most of their friends and family?  You can expect people to travel for a wedding, but not really for showers. 

Wow, really? Almost all of my cousins have had them as well as most of my high school, college, and adult-made friends. Not gonna lie, some part of me is jealous at how much money you have saved here. 

I live near most of my paternal family and am about a day's drive from my mother's side (and I have 21 first cousins...) so that might be part of it. Plus most of my friends are local. Baby showers especially have gotten big in my circle.  I've been to about 15 bridal showers and 20 baby. In other news, I can totally rock that "make a wedding dress out of toilet paper game" and you totally want me on your team if the prizes are good.

Yeah, I always think sexy gifts should be saved for the bachelorette. No one wants deal with the awkwardness of a sex swing being unwrapped in front of Great-Aunt Norma. ?

[mstee]

Tori Roloff from little people big world just had her baby and named her Laila Ray ? Reality worlds colliding. I was sitting there thinking “where did I just hear that name?” 

[JanasTattooParlor]

52 minutes ago, mstee said:

Tori Roloff from little people big world just had her baby and named her Laila Ray ? Reality worlds colliding. I was sitting there thinking “where did I just hear that name?” 

Tori named her daughter Lilah, pronounced lie-luh, so it’s really close, but not quite the same. In other names that are alike news that I saw, a Bachelor couple, Lauren Conrad, and Zooey Deschanel all named their kids Charlie Wolf(e) this year! 

[mstee]

1 hour ago, JanasTattooParlor said:

Tori named her daughter Lilah, pronounced lie-luh, so it’s really close, but not quite the same. In other names that are alike news that I saw, a Bachelor couple, Lauren Conrad, and Zooey Deschanel all named their kids Charlie Wolf(e) this year! 

Darn, I read it and posted before I’d had my coffee. Whoops! 

[BennettLeland]

Two things 

1) I thought the plan had always been for Carlin to move to Nashville with Evan and not the other way around. Do we know why things changed-was it ever addressed on the show/FB Live/ Instagram?

2) This brings me to a larger thought I have had about the Bates which is considering how patriarchial their world is I do find it incredibly surprising that all but one of the Bates daughters has convinced their husbands to move to TN (Brandon, Chad, Bobby and now Evan). Do the Bates really have such control and a tight grip that they managed to convince other patriarchial families to abide by the womans wishes? Is it because they make more money from Up if they stay? I find this all sort of fascinating. It also supports my theory that while I am sure Alyssa loves her family, she very clearly wanted out of the compound. 

[llucie]

8 minutes ago, BennettLeland said:

Two things 

1) I thought the plan had always been for Carlin to move to Nashville with Evan and not the other way around. Do we know why things changed-was it ever addressed on the show/FB Live/ Instagram?

2) This brings me to a larger thought I have had about the Bates which is considering how patriarchial their world is I do find it incredibly surprising that all but one of the Bates daughters has convinced their husbands to move to TN (Brandon, Chad, Bobby and now Evan). Do the Bates really have such control and a tight grip that they managed to convince other patriarchial families to abide by the womans wishes? Is it because they make more money from Up if they stay? I find this all sort of fascinating. It also supports my theory that while I am sure Alyssa loves her family, she very clearly wanted out of the compound. 

It was never explained. In the wedding episode we could see how upset Evan was about having to move far away from his family. My guess would be that his job/aprenticeship is in the Knoxville area, because i dont see how it would be necessary for Carlin to live near Whitney and Erin to run the online boutique. 

[fluffernutter]

Watching the wedding episode. The song they sang at the wedding is cringe-worthy, imo. It reminds me of a slow song in high school musical. It also looks so terribly hot outside. 

[neuroticcat]

My guess is that once they feel what it’s like to be alone- especially when babies can me- they miss the company and extra hands of extended family. Plus the show.

I remember after my first kid just feeling so lonely (and bored sometimes!) And I only have one sibling and love time alone. 

[Glasgowghirl]

Joy has said before that she was glad the photo shoot with the other pregnant Duggar's and Jessa and Ivy were done and she can look back at those pictures, that is how she views pictures of her pregnant and Carlin flew in to see her when she lost Annabell and is close to her. I think Carlin knew she would be fine with it and that is why she asked to use it. 

[llucie]

2 hours ago, neuroticcat said:

My guess is that once they feel what it’s like to be alone- especially when babies can me- they miss the company and extra hands of extended family. Plus the show.

I remember after my first kid just feeling so lonely (and bored sometimes!) And I only have one sibling and love time alone. 

I get that with Tori and Bobbi that moved far away from both extended families, but Carlin and Evan were suposedly going to move to Evans hometown. 

[RosyDaisy]

My guess is UP offered more money if the married couples moved closer to or stayed closer to home.  I don't see Alyssa wanting to move back to TN.  She seems to love living in FL and away from her family.  I get the impression John probably feels the same.

[RainbowSky]

Here I sit sad that people seem to want Joy to ignore that she had a little girl. How dare anyone remember her child!

Gross.

 

[Mrs.Right]

On 10/29/2019 at 10:19 AM, theotherelise said:

I would much rather watch someone open gifts at a shower than play any ridiculous games. Bring on the presents and let's take our time with it lol!

Carlin and Joy's friendship seems strong and genuine. It is admirable that Carlin seems to be truly supporting Joy through this time by showing up at the hospital and apparently asking Joy what she wants and how she feels about things like these photos. It is great that they've been able to continue a strong relationship despite the potential discomfort or pain associated with their different pregnancy experiences this summer. I can't snark genuine friendship.

Me too about watching gift opening vs playing games. Although, I just attended a baby shower recently and they didn’t have any games, but the poor mom to be spent over an hour opening gifts. That baby will have a new outfit everyday for the first day of its life.

[nelliebelle1197]

10 hours ago, RosyDaisy said:

My guess is UP offered more money if the married couples moved closer to or stayed closer to home.  I don't see Alyssa wanting to move back to TN.  She seems to love living in FL and away from her family.  I get the impression John probably feels the same.

Daniel Webster is a controlling patriarch with an image to uphold - that has something to do with it as well.

[kmachete14]

Did anyone mention yet that Zach from Little People, Big World & his wife (they are fundie lite it appears) named their daughter Lilah Ray? I'm of similar age/ family planning stage as these people and have not heard this name being popular at all among my peers, so I thought it was pretty funny they both picked variations of it! 

 

EDIT: WHOOPS JUST SAW 10 POSTS UP SOMEONE SAID IT

Edited December 4, 2019 by kmachete14

[Ivycoveredtower]

26 minutes ago, kmachete14 said:

Did anyone mention yet that Zach from Little People, Big World & his wife (they are fundie lite it appears) named their daughter Lilah Ray? I'm of similar age/ family planning stage as these people and have not heard this name being popular at all among my peers, so I thought it was pretty funny they both picked variations of it! 

 

EDIT: WHOOPS JUST SAW 10 POSTS UP SOMEONE SAID IT

Lilah is currently in the top 300 and Layla currently sits at 27 on the national list.

[rebeccawriter01]

On 11/22/2019 at 5:32 PM, Glasgowghirl said:

Joy has said before that she was glad the photo shoot with the other pregnant Duggar's and Jessa and Ivy were done and she can look back at those pictures, that is how she views pictures of her pregnant and Carlin flew in to see her when she lost Annabell and is close to her. I think Carlin knew she would be fine with it and that is why she asked to use it. 

And that is a perfectly healthy way to be about this. The biggest issue for me was that Carlin alluded to the miscarriage but didn't elaborate at all. While that isn't something you would want to make a birthday post all about, it created a situation where people question and make comments that can be hard for anyone to take. Some who don't follow as closely did not know about the miscarriage and asked questions about when was Joy due, congratulated her, etc. For me that would have been harder than seeing the picture of myself. 

I appreciate that Carlin asked Joy's permission to use the photo, indicating no ill intent. People's questions and comments aren't Carlin's fault, but it made me think that the photo (that showed a happy time in both their lives) would have made for a better gift to be given privately than a post on social media. My best friend lost her second oldest daughter (who had just turned 20) to a car accident a few weeks before my friend's birthday. I had a picture we had taken days before her daughter's death of the three of us at a festival. I chose to frame it and wrap it up with a note that said how much I love her and how much I admire her strength. 

I realize that being on a reality show and constantly on social media means that if you don't post it, it didn't happen. And I did consider posting the picture of the three of us, but chose to make the picture a more private thing that she could share if she chose. I didn't want my friend's birthday to be covered over with another influx of condolences and questions about what had happened.

I hope that Joy tuned out the comments, questions, etc. and am glad they are actually friends and have that relationship outside of their siblings. 

[nelliebelle1197]

On 12/5/2019 at 8:13 AM, rebeccawriter01 said:

And that is a perfectly healthy way to be about this. The biggest issue for me was that Carlin alluded to the miscarriage but didn't elaborate at all. While that isn't something you would want to make a birthday post all about, it created a situation where people question and make comments that can be hard for anyone to take. Some who don't follow as closely did not know about the miscarriage and asked questions about when was Joy due, congratulated her, etc. For me that would have been harder than seeing the picture of myself. 

I appreciate that Carlin asked Joy's permission to use the photo, indicating no ill intent. People's questions and comments aren't Carlin's fault, but it made me think that the photo (that showed a happy time in both their lives) would have made for a better gift to be given privately than a post on social media. My best friend lost her second oldest daughter (who had just turned 20) to a car accident a few weeks before my friend's birthday. I had a picture we had taken days before her daughter's death of the three of us at a festival. I chose to frame it and wrap it up with a note that said how much I love her and how much I admire her strength. 

I realize that being on a reality show and constantly on social media means that if you don't post it, it didn't happen. And I did consider posting the picture of the three of us, but chose to make the picture a more private thing that she could share if she chose. I didn't want my friend's birthday to be covered over with another influx of condolences and questions about what had happened.

I hope that Joy tuned out the comments, questions, etc. and am glad they are actually friends and have that relationship outside of their siblings. 

It is actually scary how much younger people have to live their lives online. I am hoping the next generation is more circumspect.

[rebeccawriter01]

On 12/10/2019 at 8:08 AM, nelliebelle1197 said:

It is actually scary how much younger people have to live their lives online. I am hoping the next generation is more circumspect.

Me too. I struggle with having my personal social media accounts, as my job in public relations includes a lot of social media. While I would prefer avoiding Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook all together, I know that I have to stay on it for my career. It's hard to earn respect from higher ups to manage such platforms if you are thumbing your nose at it in your personal life. 

Carlin seems to enjoy the spotlight being on her so much that I think she probably embraced social media without reservation once it became acceptable for the young unmarried Bates. You have to wonder if they would all be so "open" and "on brand" if there was no show or expectation. I'm sure that most would be, but I would bet at least a few would lurk and never really post anything personal about themselves if they could get away with being less calculating. 

However, it is such a double edged sword for these people. They have to stay on brand and portray just the right image. Rather than a fun thing to connect with family and friends, it is a job even before they start shilling products and codes as an influencer. It would drive me crazy to have every post analyzed by pseudo experts and to be peppered with questions about where I got my shoes, hat, belt, outfit, etc. And that doesn't even count the people who are ignorant, rude, or just a waste of oxygen.  

[Seculardaisy]

Evan’s sister does her part to remind us that she is from a garbage family that subscribes to awful beliefs.
 

Edited December 17, 2019 by Seculardaisy

[Lgirlrocks]

16 hours ago, Seculardaisy said:

Evan’s sister does her part to remind us that she is from a garbage family that subscribes to awful beliefs.
 

Christians can get offended if they won’t but they have no reason to. Lgbt people shouldn’t offend christians. They aren’t hurting anyone or attacking their religion. There are Christian people who are lgbt. 

[CorruptionInc.]

As long as everyone is consenting and aren't harming others by doing so, WHY ON EARTH does it matter who is sleeping with who? Seriously, I don't see how the LGBTQIA+ community could harm these so called "Christians". It makes no sense.

[candygirl200413]

It's like they're the same group that says everyone else is snowflakes but yes acts like a snowflake when it comes to feeling "persecuted" by allowing a kiss by two women.

[RosyDaisy]

These people have been brainwashed into believing that the LGBT+ are perverted child molesters who try to turn kids gay.  It's not just being grossed out seeing same sex couples kiss.  It's homophobia/transphobia at it's worst.