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Andrea Mills 2: Watching Tom Appear to Lose His Mind

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Petronella
4 minutes ago, Tekas_76 said:

I have to clean the house and wash his clothes and sew them when necessary. And I'm always busy… So I imagine someone with kids, a house and a husband, etc, it can be time consuming. I'm not complaining about mine, I wouldn't change him for 100 Tom's, and he's kind enough to help me by cooking most of the meals (it gives him pleasure to cook, so I won't take that joy away from him XD LOL). SO, I imagine that house care, children and spouse care, home-schooling, buying grosseries, etc, it will occupy so much time... How can she still do all that and still have time available to keep up with "everything Mills"...….. yeahhhhhh, great idea just now…. "Keeping up with the Mills"!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just want to say about the bolded...he's not doing you a favor and being "kind" to cook. He's just participating in the running of his household like the baseline responsible adult we all should be.

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Meh
can'tstopwatching
2 minutes ago, Petronella said:

I just want to say about the bolded...he's not doing you a favor and being "kind" to cook. He's just participating in the running of his household like the baseline responsible adult we all should be.

It's still ok to be appreciative of what the people in our lives do for us, even if they should be sharing those responsibilities with us anyway :)  different couples split responsibilities between them in different ways and it's nice to be grateful toward each other

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Petronella
2 minutes ago, can'tstopwatching said:

It's still ok to be appreciative of what the people in our lives do for us, even if they should be sharing those responsibilities with us anyway :)  different couples split responsibilities between them in different ways and it's nice to be grateful toward each other

It is good to be appreciative. But describing herself as "having to" keep the house clean and wash his clothes and his contribution as being a generosity caught my eye. It's the contrast that makes me feel sad. I hope he's as appreciative of her.

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Jasminfetty
2 hours ago, Spanger said:

“Career woman” is a bizzarely outdated term for a ‘mid-20s’ person to be using.  I’m 10 years older and no one I know says that.  Maybe my mom’s generation did back in the early 90s while watching Murphy Brown and Designing Women?

As a non-mom myself, just what I’ve gathered from watching friends who are parents- no one I know who is a parent to 3 kids seems to have anywhere near the free time in a day as what Rachel Mills spends on the Mills family channels, whether they are home with kids or working out of the house.  Just saying.

Anyway, welcome to FJ and I’m glad you’ve come here to discuss whatever it is you’d like to talk about with us... I firmly beleive the kids should be left alone on their own YT channels.  Especially Mileena.

I have a career myself , I work a lot of hours a week. I'm not taking away from the work a stay at home mom does but shes at home. I lived in a home with 13 other kids and being the oldest I had a lot of responsibility. I got my work ethic and patience from it. What ticked me off is seeing people post nasty stuff on Mileenas channel. 

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Jasminfetty
45 minutes ago, Tekas_76 said:

 

45 minutes ago, Tekas_76 said:

I had the same thought… I even had the feeling that it could be Rachel... But it's one of his leg-humpers… Or someone pretending to be a young lady in her 20's (with a fake Youtube profile and all)... but with a slang of someone much older, IMO, just saying...

Once again… I had a feeling that it was Rachel under a fake profile... Giving herself compliments and saying good things that nobody will ever say about her...

Yes, the quantity of junky food that he buys covers almost 99% of the total purchase. Last shopping video that I saw, I think that, as far as I can remember, the only healthy thing they've bought was two packages of apples (one of them he didn't want to buy, because it wasn't his favorite kind of apple… once again, all about Tom!!!). The rest was lots of sugary stuff, lots of carbs, candy, soft drinks, more crisps, more noodles, a lot of butter and cheese, and peperoni because "we eat a lot of peperoni". It's sad, really sad seeing that the kids nutrition is so poor, even though he claims to be using too much money for the food (like he never did before!!).

At first I thought on answering her, but then I thought about it and decided not to give it to much importance, to not get affected by it… let's just ignore, otherwise she will feel empowered!! I don't care, not even a bit. If she thought that I would be scared by her finding me here and describe my former photo, she's completely wrong… I don't give a damn...

I changed my photo not because of her, but because it's more appropriate… the evil minion... LOL that's me XD

Yep, it's like saying: let's ignore centuries of studies and researches from the medical community, but let's take this wonderful herb tea and we'll be healed… Oh, and we'll have to pray a lot also (otherwise it won't work)!!!

I remember seeing the term "career woman" in the movie "Working Girl" from 1988 (yes, I am old enough to have watched it XD), but it's a term that I never used, specially because I was raised into thinking that a girl has to study and to get a job, besides being a good housewife and taking care of the children and the husband. I was trained by my mother to learn everything about being a good housekeeper and trained by my father about fixing stuff, handicraft, electricity, plumbing, wood work, etc. So I can do almost everything (I don't enjoy cooking a lot, but I know how to eat healthy and to do a few nice stuff - healthy)… And that all keeps me busy, besides working all week… I also had a  5 years course at University, which I finished!! And it was in a private institution... and my parents didn't went bankrupt...

I don't have children but my boyfriend/husband, which I live with (for almost 5 years), can count as one?? I have to clean the house and wash his clothes and sew them when necessary. And I'm always busy… So I imagine someone with kids, a house and a husband, etc, it can be time consuming. I'm not complaining about mine, I wouldn't change him for 100 Tom's, and he's kind enough to help me by cooking most of the meals (it gives him pleasure to cook, so I won't take that joy away from him XD LOL). SO, I imagine that house care, children and spouse care, home-schooling, buying grosseries, etc, it will occupy so much time... How can she still do all that and still have time available to keep up with "everything Mills"...….. yeahhhhhh, great idea just now…. "Keeping up with the 

I'm not Rachel lol, I know I use outdated terms I'm the youngest person at my job, so I probably know more slang from the 80s than modern day ones. I was definitely not raised in a religious household. I was into new age spirituality when I was a teenager, reading tarot cards was a way I made money but now I live a more conservative life ever since I live on my own . I dont agree with everything they do , but still have respect for them and I admire how close they are. 

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Petronella
13 minutes ago, Jasminfetty said:

I have a career myself , I work a lot of hours a week. I'm not taking away from the work a stay at home mom does but shes at home. I lived in a home with 13 other kids and being the oldest I had a lot of responsibility. I got my work ethic and patience from it. What ticked me off is seeing people post nasty stuff on Mileenas channel. 

Thanks for clarifying where you're coming from. I agree that MIleena should be off-limits.

How familiar are you with Free Jinger and what's discussed here? You sound like you fit in the role we often refer to as "sister mom." If you don't mind me asking, was your family religious and quiverfull? Do you feel you've rebelled from that, or was the transition into working and living away from home gentler than that? (Edit: just saw your second post about not having a religious family. Fourteen kids is a lot for a non-religious choice!)

Edited by Petronella

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Wine time!
Tekas_76
38 minutes ago, Petronella said:

I just want to say about the bolded...he's not doing you a favor and being "kind" to cook. He's just participating in the running of his household like the baseline responsible adult we all should be.

i know my dear, i know… but sometimes it's better to be grateful for every little positive thing in our lives (and i really don't appreciate cooking, lol)... i know that he should help me more, with the cleaning of the house and the laundry, but... (whisper)… Besides that i have a work and language school to learn Danish (that is a difficult language, but i hardly have time or energy to study). In the meanwhile i try to show him and teach him how to do stuff (and sometimes ask him how would he do if i suddenly die).

But i totally agree with you, it was just a way of saying (to be kind)… maybe i come from a family where my father doesn't know even how to fry eggs or to make anything else in the home (home keeping stuff)… that makes me think, am I doing to mine that same as my mother did to my father, being over caring and doing everything without having his participation?? OMFG, it must be that, you're totally right...

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Jasminfetty
3 minutes ago, Petronella said:

Thanks for clarifying where you're coming from. I agree that MIleena should be off-limits.

How familiar are you with Free Jinger and what's discussed here? You sound like you fit in the role we often refer to as "sister mom." If you don't mind me asking, was your family religious and quiverfull? Do you feel you've rebelled from that, or was the transition into working and living away from home gentler than that?

I'm very new tbh , I used to read the duggars stuff mostly. My family wasnt religious. My mom was into astrology and practiced palm reading.  I do feel at times I am the black sheep. 

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Wine time!
Tekas_76
45 minutes ago, can'tstopwatching said:

It's still ok to be appreciative of what the people in our lives do for us, even if they should be sharing those responsibilities with us anyway :)  different couples split responsibilities between them in different ways and it's nice to be grateful toward each other

Yes, my dear… I'm grateful for every little thing that someone can do for me. It's nice 🙂 I am grateful for many things in my life ❤️

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under siege
 
 
 
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12 minutes ago, Jasminfetty said:

. What ticked me off is seeing people post nasty stuff on Mileenas channel. 

I mentioned before about comments regarding Mileena. A while back I started noticing comments about her on vlogs she appeared in that Andrea shared. Some of Tom's youtube people were the ones leaving not very pleasant comments.  It's very odd to me that know some of those youtube people are now supportive of her because they think it will win some brownie points with Tom. Not for a second do I think they care about the poor girl because as I mentioned, they weren't all that nice when it was Andrea running the show, not Tom.

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Petronella
22 minutes ago, Tekas_76 said:

i know my dear, i know… but sometimes it's better to be grateful for every little positive thing in our lives (and i really don't appreciate cooking, lol)... i know that he should help me more, with the cleaning of the house and the laundry, but... (whisper)… Besides that i have a work and language school to learn Danish (that is a difficult language, but i hardly have time or energy to study). In the meanwhile i try to show him and teach him how to do stuff (and sometimes ask him how would he do if i suddenly die).

But i totally agree with you, it was just a way of saying (to be kind)… maybe i come from a family where my father doesn't know even how to fry eggs or to make anything else in the home (home keeping stuff)… that makes me think, am I doing to mine that same as my mother did to my father, being over caring and doing everything without having his participation?? OMFG, it must be that, you're totally right...

You sound really kind.

I mentioned it not to be critical of your choice of words, but just to point it out in case a change in vocabulary may be helpful and loving to yourself.

Even here where you say "I know he should help me more" implies that the work is rightly all yours. But if you are working just like him (and also going to school!) why would that be? Like some women refer to their husband's "babysitting" as if it's a special favor...it's not; it's just normal parenting!

The more we as a society normalize men taking responsibility for themselves, the happier we'll all be, including the men!

(Caveat: which is not to criticize the *choice* any couple may make for one to take on more of the housework/childcare, because that's what works best for their situation. It's the default of "this is women's work" that's the problem.)

Edited by Petronella
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Jasminfetty

I definitely am not one of them. I've always found her strength to speak her mind so admirable.  I dont care if people are religious,  most of my family arent. My brother is an atheist. But I noticed I get a lot of hate from people I used to be friends with ever since I became a Christian,  they think it's a shame. I come from old Ukrainian bloodline that embraced spirituality and practiced wicca. 

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Petronella
4 minutes ago, Jasminfetty said:

But I noticed I get a lot of hate from people I used to be friends with ever since I became a Christian,  they think it's a shame. I come from old Ukrainian bloodline that embraced spirituality and practiced wicca. 

I'm a practicing Christian too. A lot of people on FJ are (and a lot aren't!). What is criticized here isn't religion itself; it's extremism. The people we talk about aren't just making choices for themselves; they're making choices that harm their children and also demanding that others make these same choices or be damned to hell.

Just want you to know that being personally religious or personally a homemaker or personally homeschooling is 100% welcome here. Just as not being/doing those things is also 100% welcome.

Welcome 🙂

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