Fundie Divorces

[hoipolloi]

32 minutes ago, Howl said:

Is Nathan's post a criticism of Shoshanna's approach with her son? And a condemnation of Shoshanna herself?  It seems he's flinging a LOT of heavy, harsh Bible fu her way and this   "when two people decide to have sex prior to marriage they have decided to display a lack of faith in God that will forever haunt their marriage."   Is Nathan alluding to this, which yes, came immediately to mind: 

IMO, the answers to your questions are all yes. 

It is telling though that his post has apparently not been deemed "ugly comments or inappropriate questions." So there's that.

Edited October 20, 2021 by hoipolloi
Fixed typo

[JermajestyDuggar]

11 hours ago, hoipolloi said:

IMO, the answers to your questions are all yes. 

It is telling though that his post has apparently not been deemed "ugly comments or inappropriate questions." So there's that.

Since he’s her brother and didn’t come right out and say it, I guess she will let it slide. Some of the other comments are interesting though. I can see a few fundies questioning their own beliefs in the comments and that’s good. Questioning can be the beginning of the end of strict fundie legalism. 

[Howl]

5 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Since he’s her brother and didn’t come right out and say it, I guess she will let it slide.

Rigid belief, patriarchal condemnation and female submission are totally on-brand for the Pearl males,  so maybe she simply must accept the admonishment. 

...and the brutality of this?   "when two people decide to have sex prior to marriage they have decided to display a lack of faith in God that will forever haunt their marriage." 

This is so, "There will be a black mark on your permanent record that will follow you for the rest of your life."*

I thought the entire point of Christianity was the sin and redemption model of being renewed in Christ, who forgives all sins allowing one to move forward as a forgiven person.  So...where premarital sex is concerned...that's all bullshit?

 

 

 

Edited October 20, 2021 by Howl

[hoipolloi]

38 minutes ago, Howl said:

I thought the entire point of Christianity was the sin and redemption model of being renewed in Christ, who forgives all sins allowing one to move forward as a forgiven person. 

I guess there are sins, and then there are SINS. 

Pre-marital sex is a SIN while beating a spouse or molesting your own children -- according to Debi Pearl in Created to Be His Helpmeet -- is a sin. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, Howl said:

Rigid belief, patriarchal condemnation and female submission are totally on-brand for the Pearl males,  so maybe she simply must accept the admonishment. 

...and the brutality of this?   "when two people decide to have sex prior to marriage they have decided to display a lack of faith in God that will forever haunt their marriage." 

This is so, "There will be a black mark on your permanent record that will follow you for the rest of your life."*

I thought the entire point of Christianity was the sin and redemption model of being renewed in Christ, who forgives all sins allowing one to move forward as a forgiven person.  So...where premarital sex is concerned...that's all bullshit?

 

 

 

I wonder if he says the same thing to his divorced brother. He may not have had premarital sex, but he had sex with his first wife, divorced and then had sex with a second wife. 

[Howl]

1 hour ago, hoipolloi said:

I guess there are sins, and then there are SINS. 

Pre-marital sex is a SIN while beating a spouse or molesting your own children -- according to Debi Pearl in Created to Be His Helpmeet -- is a sin. 

Got it.  While forcing sex on your wife (marital rape) once you are married is certainly NOT sin...virile manly Christian men have needs that must be met. 

6 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I wonder if he says the same thing to his divorced brother. He may not have had premarital sex, but he had sex with his first wife, divorced and then had sex with a second wife. 

Wife #1 has been erased, he married a woman who was (presumably) a virgin and was raised Amish, plus he's a  man,  so all good in Pearl world. 

[fundiefan]

I love watching fundies trying to spin themselves out of the crevice they already wedged themselves into. There is something beyond comical about it, however sad it actually is. When their perfect little bubbles finally burst, as most of them do, they flounder and come out with the claws and they still know best but will never acknowledge that what they now know is best is not what they knew was best before...The mental gymnastics of fundies just trying to fit their existing, less than perfect lives into the perfect mold created for them is like watching rats fight it out on  the street for their dead breakfast.

[Howl]

An encouragement to transition all things Pearl-ish (including Shoshanna, unless it's an update on her actual divorce or other divorce-specific stuff) over to the Pearls & Anasts - To Beat Up a Child topical thread in the Families and Individuals discussions.  

[bea]

I love watching fundies trying to spin themselves out of the crevice they already wedged themselves into. There is something beyond comical about it, however sad it actually is. When their perfect little bubbles finally burst, as most of them do, they flounder and come out with the claws and they still know best but will never acknowledge that what they now know is best is not what they knew was best before...The mental gymnastics of fundies just trying to fit their existing, less than perfect lives into the perfect mold created for them is like watching rats fight it out on  the street for their dead breakfast.

This is one of my biggest issues with the young fundies. Especially people like YLCF, remember them? They transitioned to the name Kindred Grace, and promptly lost my interest.
These were a young women who were incredibly starry eyed and idealistic, raised in Fundy families. They grew up, courted, got married, had kids. And all of them, as far as I know, discovered that life was way more complicated than I thought. But did they talk about how real life was a lot more complicated? About the challenges they faced? No. Of course not. They actually went into their archives and scrubbed things out, and hoped that people didn’t read what was left.
It’s the one true Scotsman fallacy. If you follow the rules, everything works out perfectly. If everything doesn’t work out perfectly, you weren’t following the rules correctly.
The rules themselves are never the problem.

[Howl]

7 hours ago, bea said:

And all of them, as far as I know, discovered that life was way more complicated than I thought. But did they talk about how real life was a lot more complicated? About the challenges they faced? No. Of course not.

Also my pet peeve!  They may have important, healing information to share about how they learned from painful realizations and came out with new insights but noooooo. 

This is one thing I like about the exvangelical movement.  They share their often painful stories and current insights. 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

Lauren Mickler, child bride and daughter of Matthew and Maranatha Chapman, appears to have split from her husband. She's now living abroad with her kids and looks to be angling for travel-influencer status. Not a hint of her fundamentalist upbringing on her very glossy instagram page, where she describes herself as a single mom. https://instagram.com/lcmickler?utm_medium=copy_link

[Jasmar]

Wow, that is one story I’d love to hear.

[Jana814]

 

1 hour ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Lauren Mickler, child bride and daughter of Matthew and Maranatha Chapman, appears to have split from her husband. She's now living abroad with her kids and looks to be angling for travel-influencer status. Not a hint of her fundamentalist upbringing on her very glossy instagram page, where she describes herself as a single mom. https://instagram.com/lcmickler?utm_medium=copy_link

Does anyone know how old she is. 

Edited November 15, 2021 by Jana814

[hoipolloi]

1 hour ago, Jana814 said:

Does anyone know how old she is. 

If this article from Patheos is right, she must be around 29 or 30 now. 

Quote

Maranatha’s story is an extreme, yes, but it is not the only one of its kind. In 2008, only weeks after turning 16, Maranatha’s daughter Lauren married a man who was 26, a man who had already been interested in her for several years.

And, yes, I'd really like to hear the backstory on how she & her kids wound up in Istanbul, Turkey last month.

[JermajestyDuggar]

9 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Lauren Mickler, child bride and daughter of Matthew and Maranatha Chapman, appears to have split from her husband. She's now living abroad with her kids and looks to be angling for travel-influencer status. Not a hint of her fundamentalist upbringing on her very glossy instagram page, where she describes herself as a single mom. https://instagram.com/lcmickler?utm_medium=copy_link

Who takes all those pictures and videos of her? I wonder if she pays someone to travel with her to take these videos and pictures. 

[Howl]

9 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Lauren Mickler, child bride and daughter of Matthew and Maranatha Chapman, appears to have split from her husband. She's now living abroad with her kids

WTAF?  She's bought a lovely flat in ISTANBUL? Private school for the kids?  It sounds like she has M.O.N.E.Y. 

Not since Vyckie Garrison flounced off to Albania have I been this gobsmacked.  Of course I was familiar with Vyckie Garrison's story but only passingly familiar with Lauren's story, based on the staggeringly creepy photo of her wedding where she looked about 12 and I think a subsequent post where she said her husband was her best friend, yada yada. 

On her web site, she describes herself as a Best-Selling Author, Story Captor, Collaborative Writer (ghost writing).

On her facebook page, Maranatha is listed as her mother, but her dad, Matthew Chapman, is listed as a "family member."

So, noodling around on the interwebs, I found her ex, Nathan Mickler.  He's still in Tyler, TX where Lauren's parents, the Chapmans, still live and own a CrossFit gym.  He has a software company.   

 

Edited November 15, 2021 by Howl

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Howl said:

WTAF?  She's bought a lovely flat in ISTANBUL? Private school for the kids?  It sounds like she has M.O.N.E.Y. 

Not since Vyckie Garrison flounced off to Albania have I been this gobsmacked.  Of course I was familiar with Vyckie Garrison's story but only passingly familiar with Lauren's story, based on the staggeringly creepy photo of her wedding where she looked about 12 and I think a subsequent post where she said her husband was her best friend, yada yada. 

On her web site, she describes herself as a Best-Selling Author, Story Captor, Collaborative Writer (ghost writing).

On her facebook page, Maranatha is listed as her mother, but her dad, Matthew Chapman, is listed as a "family member."

So, noodling around on the interwebs, I found her ex, Nathan Mickler.  He's still in Tyler, TX where Lauren's parents, the Chapmans, still live and own a CrossFit gym.  He has a software company.   

 

Maybe she made out big in the divorce. 

[fundiefan]

11 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Lauren Mickler, child bride and daughter of Matthew and Maranatha Chapman, appears to have split from her husband. She's now living abroad with her kids and looks to be angling for travel-influencer status. Not a hint of her fundamentalist upbringing on her very glossy instagram page, where she describes herself as a single mom. https://instagram.com/lcmickler?utm_medium=copy_link

Wow. From "Wearing His Purity" & being married off at 15? 16? to divorced woman IG body posing while traveling - with a Cross Fit conversion in the middle - makes an interesting life. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

Wow. From "Wearing His Purity" & being married off at 15? 16? to divorced woman IG body posing while traveling - with a Cross Fit conversion in the middle - makes an interesting life. 

I think when the Chapman’s started their CrossFit, the modesty went totally out the window. The CrossFit culture want to show off their results. Which means showing lots of skin.

[JMO]

She is gorgeous.  Wow.  Coming from her toxic background I think she could easily write a memoir that would explode.  Wishing the best for her.  Her mother's story always made me go WTF.  Hers wasn't much better. 

[Jana814]

30 minutes ago, JMO said:

She is gorgeous.  Wow.  Coming from her toxic background I think she could easily write a memoir that would explode.  Wishing the best for her.  Her mother's story always made me go WTF.  Hers wasn't much better. 

What was her mother’s story again?  

[Alisamer]

3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Who takes all those pictures and videos of her? I wonder if she pays someone to travel with her to take these videos and pictures. 

How can I get this job?!?!?!?!?

Seriously. If anyone reading this is a wealthy traveler looking for someone to take videos and photos of them, I'm in. That would be my dream job. 

29 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

What was her mother’s story again?  

Here's a link: 

 

Basically she was 13 when much older dude told her dad he wanted to marry her, dad made her dress in her wedding dress and sit around waiting to be whisked away to her wedding, and they got married when she was 15 and I think he was 28. She looked younger, he looked older. The whole thing was creepy.

[Antipatriarch]

14 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

Here's a link

Good. GRIEF. 🤮

That takes "controlling fundie father, submissive daughter, purity culture" and dials it up to 110.

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

Good. GRIEF. 🤮

That takes "controlling fundie father, submissive daughter, purity culture" and dials it up to 110.

This divorce isn’t that shocking to me. She isn’t bogged down with 10 children. She doesn’t seem to be poor. She is conventionally beautiful and fit. She has many more options than other women who were forced to marry at 15. It’s sad that there are so many other women who don’t have the options she has to get out of an unhappy marriage. 

[hoipolloi]

35 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

She has many more options than other women who were forced to marry at 15

In looking at her FB page, she seems to have the unqualified & enthusiastic support of her father. He cheers her on in the comments.

I'd like to know what happened in this family within the last 10 years to propel them out of fundiedom. Perhaps CrossFit was a catalyst but how did the program -- with its skintight exercise clothing & exposed bodies -- become acceptable to the uber-fundie Chapmans?