Josiah and Lauren 15: The Drama Llama Rolls On

[kiwi]

I assumed Asa was a girl from what they had previously shared online. The only Asa i know is female, pronounced A-Sar

“Big brother Asa”... im sorry but shes reaching - massively!! 5-6 weeks pregnant, even giving the baby (using that term loosely) a name is reaching at that point - let alone “knowing” a gender. Im sure all the family (even the ultra fundie ones) are rolling their eyes at this unusual behaviour.

I feel for this new baby, Lauren is clearly in over her head emotionally and mentally.


I find the cake extremely poor taste given what Joy has been through.

[Peaches-n-Beans]

4 hours ago, kiwi said:

I assumed Asa was a girl from what they had previously shared online. The only Asa i know is female, pronounced A-Sar

“Big brother Asa”... im sorry but shes reaching - massively!! 5-6 weeks pregnant, even giving the baby (using that term loosely) a name is reaching at that point - let alone “knowing” a gender. Im sure all the family (even the ultra fundie ones) are rolling their eyes at this unusual behaviour.

I feel for this new baby, Lauren is clearly in over her head emotionally and mentally.


I find the cake extremely poor taste given what Joy has been through.

I do have to disagree with you. While I don't think Lauren is handling the loss in a healthy way I don't think naming the baby is in and of itself unhealthy. I know plenty of perfectly healthy people assign names to the babies they lost even early in pregnancy, and I know plenty that don't. The thing I think is unhealthy is that Lauren seems to hold this baby on a pedestal, and I'm not sure there will be any room up there for her living children. I also think she's using this loss as an 'excuse' for ongoing depression and doubt she might have about her marriage, because it's a reason fundies would assume is appropriate for these feelings and thoughts. 

[Chewing Gum]

On 11/5/2019 at 1:31 AM, Peaches-n-Beans said:

I do have to disagree with you. While I don't think Lauren is handling the loss in a healthy way I don't think naming the baby is in and of itself unhealthy. I know plenty of perfectly healthy people assign names to the babies they lost even early in pregnancy, and I know plenty that don't. The thing I think is unhealthy is that Lauren seems to hold this baby on a pedestal, and I'm not sure there will be any room up there for her living children. I also think she's using this loss as an 'excuse' for ongoing depression and doubt she might have about her marriage, because it's a reason fundies would assume is appropriate for these feelings and thoughts. 

Thank you! I totally agree. 

I named my 5week old miscarriaged pregnancy, in order to come to terms with it's loss. I did not for the two lost pregnancies after that, for there was no need to. Everyone deals with grief differently and I give Lauren that space. I do, however, think she needs professional help from what I've seen. 

[Glasgowghirl]

28 minutes ago, Chewing Gum said:

Thank you! I totally agree. 

I named my 5week old miscarriaged pregnancy, in order to come to terms with it's loss. I did not for the two lost pregnancies after that, for there was no need to. Everyone deals with grief differently and I give Lauren that space. I do, however, think she needs professional help from what I've seen. 

That is my stance too, my sister did informally name her twins she lost after her and her then boyfriend because she didn't know their genders but when she had a miscarriage when my nephew was one a couple of years later she didn't. Lauren seems to be struggling and while I do find her annoying, I also worry for her and how she will cope after she has her daughter. I think her and Si should have waited a few more months before getting pregnant again or even a year.

[Iamtheway]

Wait? To get pregnant? But ... but ... but Jesus! 

[Bobology]

I am seriously wondering if they will have Asa's memento box or a blue balloon for him in their daughter's birth announcement photo. It really wouldn't surprise me, because I can see Lauren wanting  the whole family 'together' for that.

[Peaches-n-Beans]

7 hours ago, Bobology said:

I am seriously wondering if they will have Asa's memento box or a blue balloon for him in their daughter's birth announcement photo. It really wouldn't surprise me, because I can see Lauren wanting  the whole family 'together' for that.

Given Laurens history with the Asa box, yeah I think they will. And I don't think there's anything wrong with acknowledging a previous loss, what I do think though is that Lauren is taking this to an extreme because of some other underlying mental health issue. Being depressed over the loss is okay. Being depressed is not because Jesus. I worry a bit about what will happen when she has her daughter and all of a sudden it isn't acceptable to be "Wallowing"* in the loss

*I don't mean that I think this is what she's doing. I think this is how people in her fundie community will see it. I personally think what Lauren needs is some actual, qualified help. 

[amendgitan]

On 11/1/2019 at 8:04 PM, Bad Wolf said:

Honest question: in the time of the dinosaurs, when I had my kids, we had to wait till they were born to find out the sex (sorry, gender). How early can you find out now? Was Asa really male, or did they just assign that to him?

If she was honest wouldn’t it have been a girl? Aren’t all fetuses girls until a hormone shift happens at around 7 weeks? 

On 11/2/2019 at 8:51 PM, HumbleJillyMuffin said:

She said pregnancy tests and letters they wrote to the baby. Couldn't be more than that, really. 

Lauren comes across as so whiney to me. I don't know how to describe it, but her voice and inflection are incredibly annoying. And of course it doesn't help that she's going on and on about a lost pregnancy that she couldn't have known about for longer than a week. I'm not trying to be insensitive but she seems to have some serious issues with attention and being recognized for her miscarriage. What a martyr. 

That’s my feeling. Something about her grief just feels like performance to me. Something doesn’t feel real about it. It’s the sense I get. 

[Virago]

Y’all quit riding Lauren. She’s just a Goth trapped in a fundie world.

Dead baby box - check

Sister throwing period dress tea parties - check

Vaguely theming a wedding to a dead horse - check 

[Four is Enough]

was trying to write lines for this song... just can't do it.. "Gothic in a Fundie World..."

https://youtu.be/6p-lDYPR2P8?t=59

[Fundie Bunny]

2 hours ago, Virago said:

Sister throwing period dress tea parties - check

Vaguely theming a wedding to a dead horse - check 

I wasn't really paying attention to the duggars while those two got married, can anyone explain me what the fuck does that mean?

[Tangy Bee]

12 minutes ago, Fundie Bunny said:

I wasn't really paying attention to the duggars while those two got married, can anyone explain me what the fuck does that mean?

Not sure about any of Lauren's family traditions. I do recall JB and Michelle mentioning that when their daughters start their periods they would take them on a "special" outing. I was 13 and was NOT interested in my dad knowing. Plus I was NOT happy about the big change and a tea party or dinner would have made it worse! And yes I realize some cultures celebrate periods.

[CharlieInCharge]

In this case it’s period as in time period, they did a vaguely Victorian style tea party where the guys wore hats and the ladies wore fascinators. The dead horse themed wedding is in reference to Lauren and her dad telling Miss Cindy about a horse Lauren had when she was younger called Princess. Apparently Cindy took that as her ‘inspiration’ for the wedding. 

[Virago]

What @CharlieInCharge said. But a menstrual period tea party would be way more on brand for fundie goth ?

[Tangy Bee]

38 minutes ago, CharlieInCharge said:

In this case it’s period as in time period, they did a vaguely Victorian style tea party where the guys wore hats and the ladies wore fascinators. The dead horse themed wedding is in reference to Lauren and her dad telling Miss Cindy about a horse Lauren had when she was younger called Princess. Apparently Cindy took that as her ‘inspiration’ for the wedding. 

Oops! So sorry??. Well y'all can erase that whole period story. Now I'm embarrassed. But since we are talking about time period parties, was Lauren part of the Vision Forum crowd? I just remembered they were big on throwing those types of parties.

[Virago]

I don’t think they were deep into vision forum (not certain though). Dwain has his own radio ministry and they’re Independent Baptists, I think it’s mostly reformed Presbyterians that leaned heavy into VF. 

[Georgiana]

I have a terrible hunch that Lauren will shift her grieving into being overly protective of the new baby, to the point where she is unable to leave the child or let anyone else care for them. The fundies will think this is “devotion” and completely miss that this can be a manifestation of serious PPD. 

Lauren was taught that if she did everything right, her life would be blessed and perfect. She did everything right, and still suffered a loss. Without professional help, that could easily transition into pronounced anxiety as she now feels unsure of where the next blow is coming from. 

[mango_fandango]

Asa Butterfield is a male actor. He was in Hugo and Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children among other things.

It will be interesting to see what happens with this baby. And, in fact, the family dynamics as a whole, once Lauren has had a few more children (which, let’s be honest, will happen).

[Glasgowghirl]

I have heard of period party's, I was 10 when I got mine and was too embarrassed to even tell my mum for two months, I used toilet paper for the blood, she suspected and showed me the sanitary towels so having a period party and my dad and brother knowing would have been my worst nightmare. 

[Peaches-n-Beans]

4 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

I have heard of period party's, I was 10 when I got mine and was too embarrassed to even tell my mum for two months, I used toilet paper for the blood, she suspected and showed me the sanitary towels so having a period party and my dad and brother knowing would have been my worst nightmare. 

Honestly I'd probably have done the same... only I got mine in band class at 11. The last class before Christmas break. It was a nightmare. Middleschool was hard enough, now toss in getting your first period in front of the entire class, I was miserable.

[Glasgowghirl]

10 hours ago, Peaches-n-Beans said:

Honestly I'd probably have done the same... only I got mine in band class at 11. The last class before Christmas break. It was a nightmare. Middleschool was hard enough, now toss in getting your first period in front of the entire class, I was miserable.

Exactly I was still in Primary School and none of the girl's toilets had sanitary bins at the time at school, I had to use the staff toilets at first on my period. They did eventually put some in the toilet's senior pupils used. Most of my friend's got there's when we went to high school two years after mine started. 

[Pretzel]

On 11/10/2019 at 1:15 PM, amendgitan said:

If she was honest wouldn’t it have been a girl? Aren’t all fetuses girls until a hormone shift happens at around 7 weeks? 

What you mean, I guess, is that both boys and girls develop their genitals from the same embryonic structures at around 7 weeks. The development of genitals in general is female oriented but the presence of a Y-chromosome causes the embryo to develop male genitals. However, that chromosome has been there (or not, if it's a girl) from the start. It's not like all embryos are girls and they magically turn into boys at 7 weeks. It's just that the development of male genitals sets in at around that time. Embryo still could have been a boy. 

[VBOY9977]

https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-moms/news/josiah-duggar-lauren-swanson-welcome-1st-child-after-miscarriage/

The name is Bella Milagro, which means beautiful miracle in Spanish (although it is very grammatically wrong. Oops) ((I know the meanings of the words are correct but as a Spanish speaker it hurts my eyes a bit to see it written that way))
She was born in November 8th weighting 6 lbs 5 oz and measuring 18.5 inches long. Also it was clearly a hospital birth 

Spoiler

 

Edited November 11, 2019 by VBOY9977

[viii]

Hate the name, but she’s cute. 

[Kailash]

They used Milagro. I knew I would be wrong when I said I didn’t think they would. ?