Dillards 79: Sex Education on the Fly

[Thorns]

On 8/23/2019 at 6:18 AM, neurogirl said:

 

Who would have known, Jill likes a good popp (I prefer the blackheads myself, those videos are weirdly insanely relaxing). Pic in Spoiler, and a qoutebox from who knows where or when! 

Spoiler

 

 

[AussieKrissy]

2 hours ago, Thorns said:

Who would have known, Jill likes a good popp (I prefer the blackheads myself, those videos are weirdly insanely relaxing). Pic in Spoiler, and a qoutebox from who knows where or when! 

  Hide contents

 

 

I love me some Dr Pimple Popper, I too prefer blackheads. 

The "soldering" off of the men's thick nose skin makes me queasy.

I loved the masked man....

[Lillymuffin]

8 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

That moment when you are startled awake by a strange noise in the middle of the night...and you realize it's one of the kids' toys yammering in the playroom. ?

My sister wasn’t big on dolls, but being the first grandchild, she was given a ton of them. In time they became mine, and I loved them to pieces, in particular one from Fisher-Price called Baby Soft Sounds, who made some kind of talking/crying sound when you shook her. My dad woke up one night because he thought I was having a bad dream and crying in my sleep, only to find out it was that “damn doll.” Baby Soft Sounds didn’t talk after that. 

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

8 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

That moment when you are startled awake by a strange noise in the middle of the night...and you realize it's one of the kids' toys yammering in the playroom. ?

Or your vibrator in the closet.... very scary let me tell ya.

[Smee]

I know the dog talk was a couple of days ago, but I can’t help throwing in my 2c about Goldens.

I’ve (or rather my parents have) had four. Sam was a family friendly prince until he was attacked by a Rottweiler ($10K vey bills later, never found the owners again). Then he would growl at any black dog. He also barked at lizards and any time someone went into the neighbours yard, but only on one side. Ember was the stereotypical family dog, easily trainable (I used to do obedience trials with her) and let my kids crawl on her and pull on her mouth and all sorts when they were babies. She only ever barked if I said “speak” or she was chasing a rabbit. Tasha is a softie, lazy as a dog can get and not a barker. She visits dementia patients in an aged care home and tolerates everything from kids. Henry is a pain in the ass. He’s spent more time in training than any of them but he drools, jumps, barks and knocks people over, digs holes in the yard and tears stuff to shreds (actually, they all did the ripping stuff at some point). We love him, but I don’t like him very much.

So, y’know. I still think they’re a great breed, but I’m not surprised to find there are some crummy ones especially if they haven’t got good owners.

[mstee]

15 hours ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

 

 

Yes. We totally made a mistake on this point. We planned to get a walker/push toy on the cheap to help Little Outta 2 learn to walk and then have his grandparents pick out a nice wooden one (like the wagons with blocks) for his birthday. Grandparents flaked on it (despite agreeing enthusiastically to get it) and Little Outta 2 adore his annoying Vtech walker thing. I loathe that toy so much and will be investing myself in a non music one for the next kid (if we ever have 

Is it the learning farm/barn one? My daughter is obsessed and I find myself singing “welcome to the learning farm” even when the damn thing isn’t playing music ?‍♀️

[VanillaBean]

12 hours ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

That moment when you are startled awake by a strange noise in the middle of the night...and you realize it's one of the kids' toys yammering in the playroom. ?

You have truly not lived until that toy is your daughter's remote-controlled fart machine.  Fortunately,  this was my friend's daughter.  But I'm the one who bought it for her. 

Edited September 6, 2019 by VanillaBean
Typo

[Peaches-n-Beans]

4 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Or your vibrator in the closet.... very scary let me tell ya.

You wanna talk about scary vibrator stories picture trying to sell a house, you have to leave in like 10 minutes because of short notice for the realtor and you take the dogs to the park, sit down on a bench and remember with horror you left not one, not two, but three vibrators plugged in on the night stand. 

Also toys for kids of people you want revenge on: Frozen recorder set.

[acheronbeach]

9 hours ago, Thorns said:

Who would have known, Jill likes a good popp (I prefer the blackheads myself, those videos are weirdly insanely relaxing). Pic in Spoiler, and a qoutebox from who knows where or when! 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Might've been a nice heads up to warn us that the "popp" image was   somewhat graphic under that spoiler.  That was revolting.  

[lumpentheologie]

1 hour ago, acheronbeach said:

Might've been a nice heads up to warn us that the "popp" image was   somewhat graphic under that spoiler.  That was revolting.  

I agree, I had no idea what it was referring to and made the mistake of looking at it right before going to bed.  That shit haunted my dreams. *shudder*

[StraightOuttaArkansas]

@mstee yyyyeeeeesssss it is. I could hear the song as soon as I read the words. I swear that is the most popular walker around. I noticed that you can get 5 "insert currancy here" more if you still have the phone that goes with it when reselling. I have guarded our phone because that thing is out of here before long!

One talking toy that I have been surprised to not hate is the Rock-It (that blue monster looking thing that holds a ball looking friend thing). Fisher price makes it and it was all the rage, must have, your kid will love it, last Christmas in my mom's group. We found a good deal and though why not. The British voice is actually nice (my mom played me the American one in the store while on the phone, I wasn't as fond of it) and the songs are cuter, but my favorite function is that it record your voice and play it back altered. Little Outta 2 loves this guy so it is always near him and if he gets mad he flails a bit and will hit the arm of it which then records a piece of his crying or yelling or what have you and the play back sounds so funny. I think Rockit is making fun of him and he seems to think I have offended Rockit along with him.

If you hate someone get their kid a toy guitar that only plays three songs. Little Outta 1 got one from my mom for Christmas one year. OMG. Such a shame that it needed "American batteries" and I used up my last ones just the other week. Sorry kid ?

[PennySycamore]

If you want to be scared of talking toys, watch this classic episode of Twilight Zone about The Living Doll: 

 

 

[socalrules]

Love, love, love the Twilight Zone. It still freaks me out to this day. It’s scarier and creepy then most horror movies. 

[HarleyQuinn]

I think dWRECK's sole purpose for being in law school is to sue TLC, and i hope when that happens TLC 's lawyers smack him around so badly he never attempts to practice law again.

[Snarkasarus Rex]

42 minutes ago, HarleyQuinn said:

I think dWRECK's sole purpose for being in law school is to sue TLC, and i hope when that happens TLC 's lawyers smack him around so badly he never attempts to practice law again.

While I do think he genuinely likes the law/law school, I also think he's immature and petty enough to attend so he can level the playing field.

He got into it with Pickles again on Twitter and made more cryptic comments about TLC.  I'm sure he hates her, but he hates TLC more and won't block her for that reason...he just can't help himself.

ETA:  I also think Boob pisses him off as much as TLC does, but he can't publicly address his issues with Boob without alienating their followers.  

Edited September 6, 2019 by Snarkasarus Rex

[DarkAnts]

1 hour ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

While I do think he genuinely likes the law/law school, I also think he's immature and petty enough to attend so he can level the playing field.

He got into it with Pickles again on Twitter and made more cryptic comments about TLC.  I'm sure he hates her, but he hates TLC more and won't block her for that reason...he just can't help himself.

ETA:  I also think Boob pisses him off as much as TLC does, but he can't publicly address his issues with Boob without alienating their followers.  

When did this happen? I don't see anything on his Twitter feed. There are comments that are no longer available though.

[Snarkasarus Rex]

2 minutes ago, DarkAnts said:

When did this happen? I don't see anything on his Twitter feed. There are comments that are no longer available though.

He deleted the exchange but Pickles posted it on her FB page.

[apandaaries]

21 hours ago, VanillaBean said:

You have truly not lived until that toy is your daughter's remote-controlled fart machine.  Fortunately,  this was my friend's daughter.  But I'm the one who bought it for her. 

Um. Not that I would do anything nefarious with such information, but where did you purchase this wonder?

[feministxtian]

Shortly after the Challenger disaster, my dear father taught my then not quite 3 year old daughter that NASA meant "Need Another Seven Astronauts". 

Loved it

[finnlassie]

On 9/5/2019 at 7:10 PM, Snarkasarus Rex said:

That moment when you are startled awake by a strange noise in the middle of the night...and you realize it's one of the kids' toys yammering in the playroom. ?

I think I'm finally able to forgive my parents for forbidding noise making toys after they realised how horrible Furbies were and that it was a mistake to get us ones. Just imagine four dysfunctional furbies in the middle of the night ?

[Lillymuffin]

6 hours ago, apandaaries said:

Um. Not that I would do anything nefarious with such information, but where did you purchase this wonder?

Strictly in the interest of knowledge, two of my nephews have a Minions-themed one they find hilarious. (I did not buy it for them. Their other grandma did.) 

[LacyMay]

All the talk in other threads about the DuggarBorgs new fake charity is making me ragey so I came here for some good ole fashioned wtaf snark. Luckily Jill and Wreck almost always deliver. 

So I ventured to the dark side of facebook to read the tweets and WTF? 

Is Derrick actually saying they quit the show because they couldn't get out of a contract that they weren't aware of and TLC wouldn't let them do missionary work? 

How can you not be aware of a contract? Did they not sign anything? Did they just not read what they signed? Does college educated Derrick really expect people to believe that he wasn't aware of/didn't take the time to make himself aware of the terms to his appearing on a tv show? 

How did TLC keep them from doing missionary work when they appeared on the show and had storylines based around them doing missionary work? Did I hallucinate all the episodes that were built around Jill being in scary cintral amurica? And her sisters missing her? And being afraid for her? And the never ending care packages and visits? And Jill giving her engagement ring to Cathy? 

I am so confused. I can't even wrap my head around half the stuff Derrick says. I wish he would just write the tell all and stop speaking in cryptic little twittles (my new word for his twitter riddles)

[Vivi_music]

On 9/5/2019 at 1:28 PM, Cheetah said:

Oh man, we had one that was possessed :-).. I had to make it disappear when the kids weren't noticing.  

The Furbies!

Creepy little things would start yapping in the middle of the night. Effing scary.

[justodd]

9 hours ago, finnlassie said:

I think I'm finally able to forgive my parents for forbidding noise making toys after they realised how horrible Furbies were and that it was a mistake to get us ones. Just imagine four dysfunctional furbies in the middle of the night ?

A very colorful friend of mine had a big, 70’s style van when Furbies came out. He bought a bunch of them, gave them wild, occult-themed makeovers, and used adhesive Velcro strips to line his dashboard with them. Yes, they all had batteries, and yes, they could get kind of creepy (or hilarious, if he was giving me a ride after a night at the club and I’d had enough to drink). ?????

[Snarkasarus Rex]

2 hours ago, LacyMay said:

How can you not be aware of a contract? Did they not sign anything? Did they just not read what they signed? Does college educated Derrick really expect people to believe that he wasn't aware of/didn't take the time to make himself aware of the terms to his appearing on a tv show? 

When Derick starts whining about TLC, I don’t take anything he says literally.  He’s trying to air family dirty laundry but is too much of a weasel to come out and say it, probably because Boob is still providing some support.  I suspect his beef is with Boob *and* TLC, but he won’t go after Boob directly.

This is where Pickles comes in.  She’s annoying AF to him, but he has inexplicably not blocked her.  Why?  She serves a purpose...he knows all he has to do is tweet a few morsels to her and two days later it’s in a tabloid article.   He has plausible deniability, but the public is once again curious about it.  He wants her to figure it out and do his dirty work for him.