Dillards 79: Sex Education on the Fly

[SassyPants]

Add my 80 # Golden to the list of dogs that go crazy at the sound of the door or visitors. I think we all need to send our pups to Atlantic’s house!

[OyToTheVey]

My upstairs neighbor has a golden. For a dog with a rep of being a family dog, he’s so aggressive and hyper. One time he ran across the street and almost got hit by a car. The problem was that he’s very white. Beautiful dog but a very white dog in the middle of a snow storm, he’s kinda hard to see. I actually caught the whole thing thru a window. Almost in slow motion. As he got away from his owner, he ran across a street and the car could barely stop since it was snowing and there was like 3 inches on the ground plus there were cars behind him. Thank gd nothing happened but it could have been a disaster. I hear that dog barking all the time. At every person that passes. He’s always dragging the owner. It could just be shit owners tho. But his hair looks shiny and he’s a good weight so he looks taken care of just not trained. He def needs training. 

Edited August 27, 2019 by OyToTheVey

[bella8050]

So Derick shared that today was his 21st first day of school. Yeah he totally counts the number of times he and Jill have had sex.

Spoiler

 

[PennySycamore]

@SilverBeach,  I turned on Leah's show right after The Maltese Falcon was over.  Chrissie's story is so heartbreaking.  

 

[Giraffe]

Ugh. The only dog I’ve ever met that I truly couldn’t stand was a Golden. I know they’re supposed to be great family dogs and all but I couldn’t deal with his level of enthusiasm towards life. I’m probably better suited for a pub or a bulldog ?

[PennySycamore]

@Giraffe,  I think you might have made a small typo in your post (I've made plenty of typos in my posts, but I think pubs and bulldogs would make a great combo.  Pugs are wonderful dogs.  Neither breed handles heat well though.  

[Sairrr]

This thread drift is just making me so grateful that my dog is nearly silent. He’s a husky mix, though, and they’re not really known for being huge barkers. He likes to talk but it’s nothing like what I experienced with my golden. I was never able to train the enthusiastic barking out of her in her 15 years.

Now, if I got him hooked back up to a dog sled he’d probably get pretty vocal but he’s done with that life. 

[Giraffe]

32 minutes ago, PennySycamore said:

@Giraffe,  I think you might have made a small typo in your post (I've made plenty of typos in my posts, but I think pubs and bulldogs would make a great combo.  Pugs are wonderful dogs.  Neither breed handles heat well though.  

I make so many typos in my posts but I think this is the first time where I burst out laughing and then thought “hm, bulldog + pub. That's a  really great combo” ?

[nvmbr02]

Our springer goes nuts when people come to the door too. Thankfully she never jumps on people, she just barks a lot and then when you open the door she runs around in circles and whimpers/whines. It's fine though. The first couple of years we had she she peed all over anytime someone came to the front door (she's fine with people coming in the garage door) so the whining is in an improvement. 

[Rio]

This is a bit off topic but all this talk about not being alone with a student, etc, reminded me:

Years ago I was the doctor for a patient who had terminal cancer but didn’t want his wife to be told. I felt emotional and actually about to cry so I went out and got the nurse to come in with me, to try to keep the encounter professional. She then began yelling at him about how he had to let us tell his wife!

He then filed a complaint saying I was rude but it was not me, it was the nurse! The two of us are about the same size, hair color, etc. Anyway, sometimes you just can’t win. It was very sad and frustrating at the time but there is sort of a humorous side to it all.

[Peaches-n-Beans]

6 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

We have done training, both basic obedience and a special reactive dog course. She’s deceptively strong for her size though and she just gets so excited when someone shows up that it can be tough for me to wrangle her right now (because I move slower when I’m pregnant and I probably shouldn’t be lifting her much.) I have no issues getting her to listen otherwise because we trained her to go to her crate, go to her mat, sit, stay, etc. and she normally does a great job of following commands. She even listens to our daughter and goes to her crate if our toddler is holding a treat. It’s literally only when someone shows up at the house because she gets so excited she loses all chill and simply can’t focus. 

I think I have your dog. My girl is fabulous in 99% of situations. FFS I got a notification from the realtor that someone would be looking at our house 10 minutes from the time of the text yesterday, I'd just put the dog in her crate and laid down myself (judge me all you want but I'm a dog walker and it's in the 90s here, I get tired) so I had to toss some clothes on, leash the dog and drag her out to the store up the street where we sat for over an hour and she was just chill. A school bus went by. Children screamed at her. Children screamed at each other. calm dogs walked by. reactive dogs walked by. a bus unloaded.  cars went by. Nothing, she  was fine. Then 2 hours after we got home the water guy comes and rings the doorbell, she looses her mind, barking, running in circles in the courtyard, completely different dog. No command on the face of the earth will get through to her. I don't know why, I've trained extensively, but that damned doorbell and the phone ringing make her unreachable. I even have a bark collar for car rides (she loves to sing on car rides, drives me insane) that does nothing with that doorbell or the phone ringing. 

Also there's the fact that hey, not everyone likes dogs, so yeah I get why you'd put the dog up when people come over. I usually do unless I'm 100% sure that person is okay with my dog. Cause ya know. She's a dog, she can be in her crate for a while. 

[Someone Out There]

@OyToTheVey A number of dog behavioural issues (not all) are due to the owners rather than the dogs themselves.  My udnerstanding is that a lot of dog training is more about owner training.

@Sairrr I had neighbours that had a Husky.  I was not a fan of the howling at 5am in the morning (i.e. howling at dawn)... The next neighbours with their some sort of Terrier was much better.  It barked in a much better register (Not too high, and not too low).

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, Peaches-n-Beans said:

I think I have your dog. My girl is fabulous in 99% of situations. FFS I got a notification from the realtor that someone would be looking at our house 10 minutes from the time of the text yesterday, I'd just put the dog in her crate and laid down myself (judge me all you want but I'm a dog walker and it's in the 90s here, I get tired) so I had to toss some clothes on, leash the dog and drag her out to the store up the street where we sat for over an hour and she was just chill. A school bus went by. Children screamed at her. Children screamed at each other. calm dogs walked by. reactive dogs walked by. a bus unloaded.  cars went by. Nothing, she  was fine. Then 2 hours after we got home the water guy comes and rings the doorbell, she looses her mind, barking, running in circles in the courtyard, completely different dog. No command on the face of the earth will get through to her. I don't know why, I've trained extensively, but that damned doorbell and the phone ringing make her unreachable. I even have a bark collar for car rides (she loves to sing on car rides, drives me insane) that does nothing with that doorbell or the phone ringing. 

Also there's the fact that hey, not everyone likes dogs, so yeah I get why you'd put the dog up when people come over. I usually do unless I'm 100% sure that person is okay with my dog. Cause ya know. She's a dog, she can be in her crate for a while. 

See Velocipuppy is awesome 99% of the time at home. Most of the time she’s just a loaf who wants to nap on the couch or in a sunny spot or just wants to cuddle. But she is reactive to other dogs on walks unfortunately. I avoid walking her by myself with my daughter* because it’s really hit or miss with her - sometimes she’s completely fine and just wants to say hi and other times she gets defensive and upset, which can be difficult to handle with a toddler present. We think it’s a reaction borne out of fear or nervousness rather than true aggression though because if we pick her up and carry her past the other dog she’s really calm. We think being held in our arms helps her feel safe because the other dog can’t get to her as easily. We do our best to watch for signs she’s getting hyped up and we try to keep distance from other dogs so she can stay calm easier and listen to commands, but sometimes it just isn’t possible and carrying her is the best option to keep her safe. 

And we made sure our dog was not in the house during any of the showings we had while selling our house this summer. She would have wanted to just love everyone who came in, but she’s so loud when she’s excited that they wouldn’t have been able to hear themselves talk or think. For a little beagle mix she has a shockingly powerful whine and bark (thankfully no baying though.) It gave us good outside time with her and our daughter, so that was really nice. Velocipuppy loved getting to explore the park near our house with us and we got the chance to do some decent training with her in public which was good. 

*My husband has been trying to take her for long walks in the early morning lately and he tries to practice the training we learned with her. It’s still really hit or miss unfortunately, but we honestly are doing our best. She’s the sweetest little dog when she isn’t hyped up, though she can be a bit bossy - especially when it concerns my daughter and how we care for her since she has been under the impression that our daughter is actually her baby since she first came home from the hospital. ?

2 hours ago, Someone Out There said:

@OyToTheVey A number of dog behavioural issues (not all) are due to the owners rather than the dogs themselves.  My udnerstanding is that a lot of dog training is more about owner training.

@Sairrr I had neighbours that had a Husky.  I was not a fan of the howling at 5am in the morning (i.e. howling at dawn)... The next neighbours with their some sort of Terrier was much better.  It barked in a much better register (Not too high, and not too low).

The trainer we’ve worked with takes the view that she’s training the people to understand how to communicate better with their dogs, not the other way around. It’s one of the reasons we like her so much. She’s also really big on positive reinforcement techniques and she got us converted to using a head collar for our dog when we take her out. The head collar has really helped us walk her better because she can’t pull like she does with a back harness and she can’t accidentally slip out of it like with a front harness. When I do walk her I feel much calmer and more confident about my ability to keep her safe when she’s wearing the head harness. It took getting used to for her, but she’s really good about wearing it now. 

[mollysmom]

I just want to say in light of my favorite thread drift that I love dogs more than anything in the world. Love love love them! When I've had a bad day & see a dog in an unexpected place (driving and there is a dog in the car next to me, or I see a dog while out on my walk) it makes my whole day! I know I've said this before but that was probably the hardest part about leaving my husband. I don't mean that to sound cold or callous because I still love my (soon to be ex) husband but man, I miss my little Molly so much that it hurts. She is my baby. I can't wait to live somewhere that I can have a dog again. For me....dogs are life. I love reading about your dogs...it makes me smile just picturing them!  

[Peaches-n-Beans]

@VelociRapture OKay so I work with dogs in a professional capacity (well for now, hoping to change jobs soon) and I have to say picking your dog up is the worst thing you can do. It may stop the barking but not because the dog feels safe in your arms. Rather the dog feels bigger then the other dog and like it doesn't need to defend itself and this only reinforces the fear and reactivity when your dog is smaller or on the same level as other dogs. It might come down to needing some aversives. Make pulling and loosing their mind less fun then just walking along and ignoring the other dog. Prong Collars are good for this but make sure you use one under the guide of a balanced trainer because if they're not positioned correctly they do almost nothing. 

But aside from that I mean, sometimes there's just nothing you can do. My dog will let the bark collar shock her repeatedly if she hears the phone or the doorbell, it becomes dangerous for her to have it on because she genuinely can't control it in those situations. And if you've tried prongs and aversives then it just might come down to the rather frustrating walks at really weird hours. I've done that before too and it's just as much a solution as anything else. 

[fluffernutter]

We live in a development with an HOA that only allows for 2 dogs max per household. The houses are very close together. On one side, we have who we call The Bumpasses. (get the joke there?) They have three dogs that bark and bark and bark. They get left outside for 30 min at a time- not too too long of a time, imo, but they bark at EVERYTHING. It literally never stops. When the owner walks down the street, the one dog sounds like he's choking himself from barking so hard and the owner looks like he''s skiing from the pulling. The other side has 5 dogs. Her dogs bark just as much, and she yells at them all day in a high pitched, whiny voice. "Trixy Mae, don't dooooooooo thattttt Stop Barkinnnnng!!" She calls them all by their first and middle names. ? Because there are so many dogs, it always smells like dog shit out back. We had a dog when the kids were growing up- a wonderful black lab. He was a great dog. He died a year and a half ago. It's not that I don't like dogs- I don't like dog owners that never bother to train their dogs. We are moving at the end of the year when our youngest graduates high school. I can't wait. 

[VelociRapture]

37 minutes ago, Peaches-n-Beans said:

@VelociRapture OKay so I work with dogs in a professional capacity (well for now, hoping to change jobs soon) and I have to say picking your dog up is the worst thing you can do. It may stop the barking but not because the dog feels safe in your arms. Rather the dog feels bigger then the other dog and like it doesn't need to defend itself and this only reinforces the fear and reactivity when your dog is smaller or on the same level as other dogs. It might come down to needing some aversives. Make pulling and loosing their mind less fun then just walking along and ignoring the other dog. Prong Collars are good for this but make sure you use one under the guide of a balanced trainer because if they're not positioned correctly they do almost nothing. 

But aside from that I mean, sometimes there's just nothing you can do. My dog will let the bark collar shock her repeatedly if she hears the phone or the doorbell, it becomes dangerous for her to have it on because she genuinely can't control it in those situations. And if you've tried prongs and aversives then it just might come down to the rather frustrating walks at really weird hours. I've done that before too and it's just as much a solution as anything else. 

So our dog has a bad case of Napoleon Complex? Yeah. I can absolutely see that being the case. She’s very sweet, but she’s definitely a diva in some ways. ? But yeah, picking her up is honestly the only way we can get her past another dog sometimes. We try not to do it too much, but sometimes there isn’t a real choice.

We don’t feel comfortable with prong collars personally because our trainer is against the use of them and other types of collars that restrain around the neck - she’s a big believer in head harnesses because they offer such great control most of the time, prevent pulling, and prevent the dog from slipping out of the harness/collar. She knows she can’t control what people do outside the classroom, but she’s actually kicked people out of her classes for refusing to give up collars like that during class sessions. We don’t want to get our dog used to anything that might not be allowed during class if we do another course with her in the future and we’d really prefer to continue trying positive reinforcement techniques first.

My husband walking her really early seems to help sometimes. There are less dogs out and about at that time, so less distractions for her. When they do see another dog they try to cross the road before they get too close - she does a better job staying calm with the road in between them as a buffer and he’s able to do positive reinforcement with treats easier that way too. She does have a small group of dogs she gets along with very well - two dogs in our current neighborhood (one much bigger and one much smaller) as well as my sister’s beagle* - so she isn’t opposed to every dog. She has gotten better over the years thanks to training and a bit of maturing due to age. For instance, she used to be incapable of calming down when anyone came over, but now she usually calms down within ten or fifteen minutes when our families come over and she stays calmer for longer periods of time. 

There’s definitely still room for improvement though. I’m hoping we can practice more easily and consistently when we move next month since our new neighborhood will have sidewalks everywhere and we won’t need to drive anywhere to walk her safely. Only downside is we don’t have a fenced area at the new house, but we plan to carefully introduce a lead under close supervision in the backyard and see how she does with that. 

*She loves playing off leash with him. She is literally his only friend because he’s more reactive than she is. We think with him it’s an issue of breeding since some of the other dogs from his litter have very similar issues as him. It took a lot of careful, short, on-leash interactions to get to the point where they were able to play off leash together at all, but they absolutely adore one another and it’s the cutest thing to see them have so much fun together.

[Sullie06]

11 hours ago, HarryPotterFan said:

I feel like I might be starting a new topic of doom by asking this, but is it okay to give a four year old gum? I probably wouldn’t trust a kid that age with it.

For sure depends on the kid. My son has a mild SPD and has a really bad oral fixation to the point where everything goes in his mouth. It's very distracting in school. Part of his behavior plan is chewing gum to satisfy that oral need. He's been doing it since PreK so he was 4 when he started chewing gum. But we don't allow gum when he's out playing or running around, he uses it to help concentration. 

[Peaches-n-Beans]

2 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

So our dog has a bad case of Napoleon Complex? Yeah. I can absolutely see that being the case. She’s very sweet, but she’s definitely a diva in some ways. ? But yeah, picking her up is honestly the only way we can get her past another dog sometimes. We try not to do it too much, but sometimes there isn’t a real choice.

We don’t feel comfortable with prong collars personally because our trainer is against the use of them and other types of collars that restrain around the neck - she’s a big believer in head harnesses because they offer such great control most of the time, prevent pulling, and prevent the dog from slipping out of the harness/collar. She knows she can’t control what people do outside the classroom, but she’s actually kicked people out of her classes for refusing to give up collars like that during class sessions. We don’t want to get our dog used to anything that might not be allowed during class if we do another course with her in the future and we’d really prefer to continue trying positive reinforcement techniques first.

My husband walking her really early seems to help sometimes. There are less dogs out and about at that time, so less distractions for her. When they do see another dog they try to cross the road before they get too close - she does a better job staying calm with the road in between them as a buffer and he’s able to do positive reinforcement with treats easier that way too. She does have a small group of dogs she gets along with very well - two dogs in our current neighborhood (one much bigger and one much smaller) as well as my sister’s beagle* - so she isn’t opposed to every dog. She has gotten better over the years thanks to training and a bit of maturing due to age. For instance, she used to be incapable of calming down when anyone came over, but now she usually calms down within ten or fifteen minutes when our families come over and she stays calmer for longer periods of time. 

There’s definitely still room for improvement though. I’m hoping we can practice more easily and consistently when we move next month since our new neighborhood will have sidewalks everywhere and we won’t need to drive anywhere to walk her safely. Only downside is we don’t have a fenced area at the new house, but we plan to carefully introduce a lead under close supervision in the backyard and see how she does with that. 

*She loves playing off leash with him. She is literally his only friend because he’s more reactive than she is. We think with him it’s an issue of breeding since some of the other dogs from his litter have very similar issues as him. It took a lot of careful, short, on-leash interactions to get to the point where they were able to play off leash together at all, but they absolutely adore one another and it’s the cutest thing to see them have so much fun together.

OMG napoleon complex! XD I'm totally gonna use that. 

Head harnesses can actually cause a lot of harm if the dog lunges they can cause serious damage to the neck so I would be careful with those. Personally I'm more comfortable with prongs because they give a really quick little "POP" without actually hurting the dog. Usually when a tool like a prong or an ecollar cause harm to the dog it's because they've been used correctly and really, even a head harness or a flat collar can cause harm. Unfortunately people use Prongs incorrectly all the time because they think it makes their dog look "cool" (which totally isn't the purpose and it drives me insane when people use them willy nilly with no idea how to use them). Personally I'd immediately leave a training class that didn't allow the use of a flat collar or a prong but that's just me. I work with serious dogs a lot of the time (Think Malinois, Jindo, Akita, and Shiba (do not get my started on Shibas)), and sometimes you need a bit of 'umph' behind it to get them to listen. Nothing wrong with that. 

There's a facebook group "No Nonsense Dog Training" that I've found to be insanely helpful with my nutcase. She's a bit of an OCD headcase (she's a border collie and has actual legitimate OCD, because well... why wouldn't she? XD). But like I said, if you've tried everything sometimes you just have a reactive dog and really there's no problem with that. I don't get along with every person, so why should a dog have to get on with every dog ya know? 

As for reactivity being genetic that's totally a thing. I personally have only had rescue dogs, but my current dog is a rescue collie, so basically a walking genetic disaster XD. Think the Triceratops in Jurassic Park who got sick literally all the time. That's my dog. But when purchasing a dog from a breeder its important to pick one who health tests properly (OFA scores, genetic testing appropriate for the breed ect.) and temperament tests dogs because these do minimize issues. 

Yikes on the no fence, can you put one up or are you renting? We were denied by several rescues as a kid because we were renters and weren't allowed to put up a fence. I don't know much about introducing to a lead as my gal loves hers. Sidewalks are a total bonus though, I used to live in a neighborhood with none for a half mile and it made walking a nightmare. We had this one neighbor who actually put up a camera in his window so he could see the yard and if anyone stepped foot in his yard for any reason, even avoiding a car, he got pissed. Which I mean, yeah it's his property, but I was also 14 years old and it was for about 2 seconds. Let go a little people XD

[Italiangirl]

My baby boy is a pure Goldie and he is fantastic, when i or my parents are at home he just want to star near us so he usually follow me or my mother around home, if someone ring the bell or pass near the house he barks unsless he know the person. When we are out he goes well with basically every dog except for the weimaraner I don't know why but for now we encounter two different weimaraner a make and a female in two very different settings, first in the fenced dog area near our house in florence and one up in the mountain just a few days ago...

He is in a training from a year now but the training is more for him to get some experience with different dog (big, little, scared, rescued,young, old) and to burn some of his high energy. We train together to parkour dog and agility and he love it he hies very well with scared dog and high energy beagles because he his very calm and relax so he just help those dog to calm down and relax. His best friend is a hard-haired dachshund they are so funny together! 

[Lizzybet]

@VelociRapturewould you elaborate on what a head harness is, please? Our dog walks well on leash, but she gets tangled up all the time, because the collar we use tends to turn toward the front of her neck (I think it’s the weight of her rabies, license, microchip, and I.D. tags). I was thinking she needs a harness that attaches to the leash on her back. But now I’m thinking something on her head could be better.

I would keep her collar with all her stuff on it, but not use it with the leash.

Thank you.

[Peaches-n-Beans]

45 minutes ago, Lizzybet said:

@VelociRapturewould you elaborate on what a head harness is, please? Our dog walks well on leash, but she gets tangled up all the time, because the collar we use tends to turn toward the front of her neck (I think it’s the weight of her rabies, license, microchip, and I.D. tags). I was thinking she needs a harness that attaches to the leash on her back. But now I’m thinking something on her head could be better.

I would keep her collar with all her stuff on it, but not use it with the leash.

Thank you.

By head harness I'm pretty sure she means a Halti, theyr'e pretty cheap on amazon but honestly I'm wary of them. But as with any tool it depends on the dog. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

13 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

I feel like that's God's way of telling her she needs to cut a foot of it off.

As a woman with lots of hair, but  but just touches the top of the band of my bra, I've had a child get gum in my hair and had to have help getting it out, but DH didn't chew it he threw it in the trash. That is straight up mommyhood, but the husband chewing it, is straight up NASTY.

12 hours ago, bella8050 said:

So Derick shared that today was his 21st first day of school. Yeah he totally counts the number of times he and Jill have had sex.

  Hide contents

 

He is an accountant, they do that,  N

ot to defend him, because he's him and this is weird, but it isn't weird considering his education.  If that makes sense. 

[Timetostoplurking]

I love love love dogs.  I have 2! They are both getting old and it’s been really hard to watch that happen.  “Lab mix”is diabetic, blind, bad hip.  “Little white” is super healthy but has few teeth. Lol.  

The best advise I ever got for walking a reactive, pulling, barking type dog was to immediately walk in the opposite direction when they pull or bark.  It made for some goofy looking walks when “Lab mix” was a puppy, but 13 years later she never pulls.  Sometimes I never made it for more than a block or so, but all that turning and back and forth walking forced her to pay attention to me and not react so much to her surroundings.    It worked like a charm.  

[viii]

All this dog talk is making me want a puppy so bad. Sadly my apartment building doesn't allow them, and with working two jobs, I wouldn't be home enough.