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Bro Gary Hawkins 11: Bro likes his food


samurai_sarah

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I wonder if Gary dreamed of defending his family like a famous film character. I can see it now:

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8 minutes ago, keepercjr said:

Also I think he meant that his brother was getting a high chair and the knife guy thought he was cutting in line so pulled out his knife. 

Ah, that makes sense.

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15 minutes ago, thoughtful said:

I wonder if Gary dreamed of defending his family like a famous film character. I can see it now:

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1365136956_brogarythatnotnife.jpg.e230c6aadedb4de02bde4c4400ad49da.jpg

 

Ah, that makes sense.

You know that Bro couldn't brandish a knife like that without slicing into himself or anyone unfortunate enough to be within arm's length.  I do believe that Bro would know which end was which and grasp the appropriate spot.  He doesn't need a knife for weens.

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1 hour ago, thoughtful said:

I wonder if Gary dreamed of defending his family like a famous film character. I can see it now:

 

I was thinking of this:

 

Spoiler

 

 

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5 hours ago, thoughtful said:

 

The "you can't even _______ anymore" rant always chaps my ass. There have been dangerous people in the world as long as there have been people. I'm older than you Gary, and I guarantee you the Good Old Days never existed.

 

 

After all the third person in the world killed the fourth.

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14 hours ago, Dana723 said:

I would have paid good money to hear Bro asking for McWeenies.

Didn’t Mickey D’s sell hot dogs at one point?

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30 minutes ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

OK Folks, the words of the mighty evangelist cut like a sharpened sword.  Bro Gary not so much.

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I watched a little of the am service (after fast forwarding through all of the "singing) and he was *screaming* about Satan.  It made me really uncomfortable because I think it was only his extended family there with all their little kids.  Notice he only talks about the crowd level for their 2nd service.  I don't think kids should be subjected to that.

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17 hours ago, Walking Cat Bed said:

I was thinking of this:

 

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Hell, I wouldn't trust Bro with a pea shooter.  He might just eat the peas.

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I see Gary as a Clint Eastwood wanna-be.  I'm not sure which line, either the one about feeling lucky today or the make my day line.  Either one would probably work for Gary.  The thought of him actually having and brandishing any type of weaponry makes my skin crawl.

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4 hours ago, Granwych said:

Hell, I wouldn't trust Bro with a pea shooter.  He might just eat the peas.

Nah. Peas are too green for Bro Gary. 

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Ok, Gary, let's see if I can figure out what you meant.

Quote

Morning service preached on don't be Satan want you Saved. Last night on why is hell there.

"In the morning service, I preached on the theme 'don't be Satan -- God wants you to be saved.' Last night I preached on  why Hell exists."

What do you think - was that a likely ween-to-English translation?

It's nice to know that people were* at the "alter" both services. I thought Gary didn't like people who've been altered.

*ETA - excuse me, "people was"

Maybe it's BEC of me to criticize Bro Gary's horrible English. I try not to be a snob about such things, but I do expect some effort from people who use words for a living, including being expected to understand and help others with the language of the KJV.

 

Edited by thoughtful
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Dude could take his kids' homeschool workbooks and improve his language usage to a least the third grade level.  Off to the prayer closet for me.

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@thoughtful the subject of Bro Gary’s mangling of the English language/Weenese has come up many times on these threads. I totally acknowledge that plenty of people have dyslexia and struggle with spelling and grammar. But, like you and others have said, if one is to use words to make a living (Bro Gary’s FB page is a useful tool for him to advertise where he’ll be next, what he preaches on etc), one has to try and be clear when writing the posts. If someone genuinely struggles with dyslexia, then they can get somebody to proofread the posts, or whatever else might be helpful. Becky seems to be better with spelling and grammar than Gary, she could help him. Most of Gary’s humpers seem to be used to Weenese, but there have been occasions where some commenters have not understood the message. 

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10 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

OK Folks, the words of the mighty evangelist cut like a sharpened sword.  Bro Gary not so much.

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766F5081-2E33-4E3E-8E1B-D9B1025FC8DB.jpeg.085d30ac726f7966ffb05c3fd7d1488b.jpeg

 

Let's see...31 inches is just under 3 feet.  Did he have a bunch of midgets and dwarves there?

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I’m beginning to think Bro Gary can barely read.  He has great difficulty reading bible passages during the preaching and maybe he can’t proof his posts cause he can’t read.  There has to be a reason for all of this nonsense..  He’s dangerously ignorant .  Learn to read Bro, it’s life changing.

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12 minutes ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

There has to be a reason for all of this nonsense.

The ween doesn't fall far from the ween cart.  Bro probably had the KJV screamed at him in Weenese from the time he was a cocktail ween, and he's now trying to share the favor with the world. 

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10 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

I’m beginning to think Bro Gary can barely read

I agree. And, ordinarily, my heart would go out to someone with that difficulty. It makes life difficult in this world full of text.

But, there are still lots of things a person could do to earn (note that word, Gary - earn) a living if reading is not their strong suit. Gary's claiming to be a preacher, a person whose work is entirely done with words, pisses me off.

Well, his being a hateful bigot with a history of child abuse adds to my disdain.

There may be people who give him the money to keep going who also struggle with words and reading, who do something difficult and dirty for a living. After a week of lawn care or cleaning port-a-potties or farming or construction work, they listen to this shmuck who probably is much stupider than any of them, and give him their hard-earned money.

 

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On 9/22/2019 at 9:31 PM, keepercjr said:

 

Also, I just looked it up and in NC anyone who has ever been convicted of a felony can’t possess a gun so he can’t legally have a gun even if he wanted one.  Doesn’t mean he doesn’t have one but it is against the law.

This is a piece I suspect he wouldn’t mention...

”I would, but those northern states hate our 2nd amendment rights!!”

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16 hours ago, thoughtful said:

 

Maybe it's BEC of me to criticize Bro Gary's horrible English. I try not to be a snob about such things, but I do expect some effort from people who use words for a living, including being expected to understand and help others with the language of the KJV.

 

I don't think it is BEC. He's set himself up as a communicator, and he's doing a terrible job of it. If you want to get your point across, you must be able to, well, get your point across... and he fails miserably at it. Even were he illiterate, or barely so, he could listen to Bible passage and memorize them. That would help his spoken ministry to an extent.

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Further comments on the knife story:

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Fine with me, Tommy.

Spoiler

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Yes, Seymour -- that would turn him right around from his knife-wielding ways.   :roll:

 

 

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2 minutes ago, thoughtful said:

Comments on the 9/24 sermon (not Bro Gary):

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:confusion-confused:

I don't remember the Bible mentioning Trump but I'm sure Trump probably believes it does. Is it one of the Gospels? Matthew, Mark, Luke, John and DONALD? 

Also, does "eyeran" mean Iran? I haven't read my Bible in  a long time but I don't remember that being mentioned in it.

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