Bro Gary Hawkins 11: Bro likes his food

[catlady]

Ok, folks.  I finished up a few other projects and made this one.  I’m working on the Pray we get it up, so I’ll share that one soon.

may Rufus keep your KFC buckets full.

[Blessings of the Corn]

oh my god I love you creative people.

[PumaLover]

OK folks, Sis Puma is finally home and not working and can recap what I’m sure will be a fascinating, fascinating video, Halloween, Full Sermon).

It be titled “Halloween” by Pastor Ronnie Baity,

Spoiler

No! No Halloweens

Winston-Salem NC, 1998. (Oh geez, I’m 12 seconds in and already can’t stand the way he talks. I knew I couldn’t recap this sober. He is far more coherent and a much better speaker than Bro, he just talks super slowly). 

The things the Gentiles sacrifice, they sacrifice to the devil. You cannot be partakers of the Lord’s table and the table of the devil. (Not sure if this is KJV?)

For the fruit of the spirit is all goodness and righteousness and truth, proving what is acceptable to the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. (Well Bro Gary is pretty unfruitful. I can think of a few other fundies, too.) 

Oh geez now he’s talking about Santa Claus vs. Jesus, and we give Santa the same attributes we give Jesus. A businessman called him and told him the preacher took all the joy out of Christmas because he exposed Santa. He wants to expose the devil. Oh now he’s talking about rabbits and eggs and Easter. It’s a counterfeit of Satan to get our eyes off Jesus and the Resurrection. 

We’ve been conned into believing Halloween is an acceptable thing for our church members to celebrate. We’re doing it out of ignorance. 

OK folks, there’s more sin in a bible believing church than a non bible believing church because the light exposes the sin. 

If you send your children out trick or treating, he wants you to know what you’re celebrating if you partake. The sidewalks will be “fueled” (filled) with kids having costumes of every imaginable character. For instance, some will be dressed up like Batman and the Joker and Wonder Woman. This year it will be popular for people to be dressed up like Bill and Monica (Kids??? Seriously? Probably not). 

People will be going up and down the streets with devils’ uniforms on. They will be dressed as ghosts and skeletons. The kids will be saying, trick or treat. Where was that phrase coined? You’ll be shocked at where it came from. (I’m waiting!!)

The homes will have grinning jack o lanterns. Skeletons or witches or black cats will decorate the houses. Sad to say, churches will have haunted houses. He’s horrified. 3 billion dollars are spent on Halloween and paraphernalia. People spend at least $50 per person nationwide on Halloween. 

Our founding fathers (who came to the shores of the new world) Would. Not. Let. Halloween be a part of America. They banned it. (Lame.) They recognized where it came from. It began being celebrated in big time in 1845. A lady in the front row who is wearing a vest over long sleeves folds her arms and looks indignant. (She has short hair, gasp!)

Halloween began with a bunch of cultures in Northern Europe as a celebration of the end of summer where these cultures gave sacrifices to their lord of death, Samhein (Say-man). He was a pagan god, thousands of years ago, as a ghostly skeleton holding a sickle in his hand. (He pronounces Celtics like they do the basketball team; I’ve always been told it’s pronounced Kelt-ics.)

A god named Muck-ola (the sun god) was losing his strength because the days were getting shorter and the leaves were falling off the trees. They believe at this time of the year, the veil between the living and dead is the thinnest it’s been, and they believe they can have seances (see-ances) with their dead loved ones. They believe all their loved ones who have died have been reincarnated as animals and they’re coming back to see them. (Geez I type fast but I can’t keep up with this ridiculous preacher).

Bonfires. They burned the animals in bonfires to appease Samhein. (I am against this, of course, and it was horribly cruel.) Now he’s talking about sacrificing people at Stonehenge, England. 

He’s talking about a lady who in 1989, who claimed she was a witch, wanted to take a week off to celebrate Halloween. It’s the highest day that witches celebrate. 

On halloween, witches meet. They drink. They dance. They spit out curses. They conjure up spirits. They engage in sexual origies. (I think he means orgies? I think I know why Bro likes this guy, because he can’t read for a fuck either.) They offer up human and animal shackrifices. (That’s not a misspelling). 

People in their area who are hunters have come across animals who have been slain/shackrificed on the altars on October 31st. They have these celebrations on October 31st and witches have been offering up human and animal sacrifices, and then disposing of the cremated remains on private land. 

He is warning parents that this upcoming week (Halloween), their kids will be taken and abducted, never to be seen again, and offered up for the witches. Now parents, is that something you feel like you should be taking part in? 

An occult writer stated, the time of the year that you have the highest rate of Satanic crime is Halloween. 

OK folks, this video is super long despite what Bro said and I will have to resume my recapping tomorrow.

[Dandruff]

On 10/23/2019 at 10:47 PM, keepercjr said:

I don't know where my reply went but  I looked it up and it looks like this app pays 5 cents per mile.  And it looks like it doesn't pay you directly but you use the accumulated $ on their partner webistes.   It requires a lot of permissions which many people may not be comfortable with granting (ie it collects a lot of data on the user).

Doubt Bro Gary would mind allowing access to his data...but the app folks might.

[PumaLover]

OK folks, I can’t sleep so I’ll try and recap more of this drivel. 

Halloween is an evil day. Halloween is a time of demonic rituals, idle worship, immorality, human sacrifices. It is a fact. There is a church of Satan and witches and Satan worshipers cast their spells on this day. 

This Satanic worshiper who just died this week (Anton something?) is burning in hell but said he’s glad Christian parents let their kids worship the devil at least one night out of the year. Halloween is the day that Satan receives glory from a vast amount of people, knowingly or unknowingly. 

He goes on about how the Catholics have All Saints’ Day on November 1st. (They moved it from the month of May and called it All Hallow’s Day which became Halloween). It was set aside to worship saints. “People who have read just enough to be ignorant” say: Halloween comes out of a good thing. He explains, these are two different things. All Saints Day is just as bad as Halloween because you don’t pray for people who have died (several amens). He’s still ranting about Catholics. 

He’s talking about why people wear costumes for Halloween. He goes on about how people believe their dead loved ones come back as animals (he’s said this twice now) to fool their loved ones into thinking they’re animals so they won’t harm them.

He talks about Christians giving out a tract on Halloween night (he says track, a la Jill). Tracts mean nothing to the people who come to your porch for candy. He’s now screaming and I can see why Bro likes him. Basically Christians should have no part in any of this. 

***I’m a terrible person because he has a lisp. Apex of what he’s saying (word for word): when you take your family out trick or treating, you are ***shitting down at the table of devils and demons. Ghosts, spooks, black cats, why would Christians want to believe there are minigods, their loved ones are reincarnated, we have to wear costumes and give out treats to not be spooked. Is that the thinking of a Christian? 

He says someone is going to go home and say, we better go on the other side of town this week (to be hidden from the preacher seeing them). God lives over there too (many amens). Beansie must have affected my internet because the video cut out. I don’t think I’m missing much though. The devil is having a heyday on October the 31st. How in the name of Heaven can you teach your kids demonism and witchcraft and say you love god. 

“You can not ***shit at the table of devils and the table of God.”

Have you spent as much time teaching your kids about Jesus as you have about Hell (driving your kids up and down the highway to trick or treat). You get your kid a jack o lantern and a bag. This kind of preaching is outdated. More yelling and haymayns. They don’t celebrate the devil’s high day anymore. They go get a meal or go shopping.

When you make Jesus as real as he ought to be they won’t want to be part of the occult. He tells everyone their eyes are closed and their heads are bowed. Creepy. He’s praying and I guess everyone else is too. He tells people to raise their hands. The camera pans from the back of the church and it looks like many of the members are elderly. They have bussed kids, apparently.

The video ends and cuts to the next video of goats dancing to Stayin’ Alive, at least on my end! 

[Ozlsn]

3 hours ago, PumaLover said:

OK folks, there’s more sin in a bible believing church than a non bible believing church because the light exposes the sin.

Huh??? So if I want to be less sinful I should go to a non-Bible believing church? I am not sure that went in the direction he was aiming for.

3 hours ago, PumaLover said:

An occult writer stated, the time of the year that you have the highest rate of Satanic crime is Halloween. 

Ok... so how does Satanic crime differ from non-Satanic crime?  I mean, if you're stealing something or murdering someone or perjuring yourself on November 1st is it inherently less criminal/evil thsn on October 31st? Does it switch over at midnight? 

Also: citation please.

[smittykins]

I’m surprised he didn’t make the “Santa=Satan” equation, like I’ve seen other preachers do.

[AmazonGrace]

1 hour ago, smittykins said:

I’m surprised he didn’t make the “Santa=Satan” equation, like I’ve seen other preachers do.

Pretty sure a percentage of these people just can't spell.

[Dandruff]

5 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Pretty sure a percentage of these people just can't spell.

A rather large percentage, I suspect.

11 hours ago, PumaLover said:

Halloween is an evil day. Halloween is a time of demonic rituals, idle worship, immorality, human sacrifices. It is a fact. There is a church of Satan and witches and Satan worshipers cast their spells on this day.

Do they eat weens?

[AmazonGrace]

They have their satanic meals at the Hall'O'Weens

[Ozlsn]

7 hours ago, smittykins said:

I’m surprised he didn’t make the “Santa=Satan” equation, like I’ve seen other preachers do.

That's next month during his "Christmas is being simultaneously repressed and taken over by Heathens" rant.

[Briefly]

2 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

They have their satanic meals at the Hall'O'Weens

The local Sonic Drive-In's do have 50-cent corndogs on Halloween.  Does that count?  I mean, they are made with hot dogs (or weens, as Bro Gary calls them).

[Dandruff]

I'll take kids asking for candy one night a year over a screaming, illiterate blowhard who grifts 365.

[wallysmommy]

I think we should all dress as our favorite fundie for Halloween.  I can tease my hair, glob on makeup, wear some Mardi Gras beads and strap a pillow around my belly and be Jill Rod.

Actually, Halloween is the least of my worries.

Edited October 26, 2019 by wallysmommy

[Dana723]

6 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

They have their satanic meals at the Hall'O'Weens

You deserve a standing ovation for that one!

Edited October 26, 2019 by Dana723
spelling error

[Lillymuffin]

23 hours ago, smittykins said:

I’m surprised he didn’t make the “Santa=Satan” equation, like I’ve seen other preachers do.

Wait tim Christmas. 

[thoughtful]

Gary may be a horrible preacher, but at least he keeps his mind somewhat on task, unlike the fellow being discussed by Stephen Colbert here:

 

[AmazonGrace]

Spoiler

A wanted ad: "In need of a preacher that is will touch cme work with there own finances and be call of GOD"

[Dandruff]

50 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

A wanted ad: "In need of a preacher that is will touch cme work with there own finances and be call of GOD"

Guess the "own finances" part means a certain someone won't be applying...though I'm sure Bro's clear and eloquent ad was muchly appreciated.

[keepercjr]

i Just don’t understand people who actually believe that some people  actually do sacrifices on Halloween.  A lot of what they think heathens do is just utter nonsense.  Have these people ever even been trick or treating?  

On a side note, look what Facebook gave me as an ad today.  This takes place on Halloween.   I have no idea why it thought this would interest me.

 

[AmazonGrace]

Why is White Jesus wearing a tie to a fist fight?

[smittykins]

3 hours ago, keepercjr said:

i Just don’t understand people who actually believe that some people  actually do sacrifices on Halloween.  A lot of what they think heathens do is just utter nonsense.  Have these people ever even been trick or treating?  

On a side note, look what Facebook gave me as an ad today.  This takes place on Halloween.   I have no idea why it thought this would interest me.

 

Is that their version of the “Hell House”?

[FundamentallyShocked]

On 10/23/2019 at 9:34 PM, PumaLover said:

ed he's going to try the Keto diet to try to lose weight. Anyone have any experience pos/neg about it?

Ok folks, I have experience. I've been keto for 11 months. I've lost 40 pounds without exercising. The first month is rough. You really have to rethink every single thing you eat. You might want to not restrict calories at first and just cut carbs to 20-30 a day.

Check out "My Fitness Pal". No, it won't pay you $0.05 a mile, but you can type in food and get the carb count super easily. I'd also recommend the Premier Protein Shakes. DM me if you have other questions.

Sis. Shocked

[Dandruff]

4 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Why is White Jesus wearing a tie to a fist fight?

And no robe...

[Granwych]

On 10/25/2019 at 11:09 AM, AmazonGrace said:

Pretty sure a percentage of these people just can't spell.

Right up there with “just can’t think.”