Bro Gary Hawkins 11: Bro likes his food

[catlady]

I see that he’s in NC, so no Red Weens In ME this time.  

@PumaLover, Rufus bless you for adopting your new chickens! 

@keepercjr, I did some chicken math this summer and went from three to five. The OG are done with egg laying, and the new ones are a little young so they should start by spring. 

[thoughtful]

FJ:
Type and please spell your words correctly,
Don’t write ineptly, use your language tools!
Bro, when the gaps are strewn at random,
You lose your fandom, Gary, and they . . .

Bro Gary:
Oh! Rules! Rules! Rules! I'm so sick of rules!
I get rules all day through;
First from Him, now from you! Is that all nitpickers can do?

Don't talk of “some” being one word; that’s just absurd! So me!
I’ll spell my words as I desire, risking your ire, So me!

I can leave a big space in the middle of a word!
Maybe leave two! Maybe a third!
Anyone who's never been in school will tell you “Geez!
I get to spell as I please!”

Haven't the time to spell things right,
I’m in God’s light, so me! So me!
Writing of weens peeking through slime,
Spelling ain’t my sacred cow! So me now!

My apologies to Lerner, Lowe, Julie Andrews, Wendy Hiller, Audrey Hepburn, Marni Nixon, and anyone else who ever played Eliza Doolittle.

[PumaLover]

I'm cracking up at Jesse Jones weenys wife. It took me a minute to understand that was the brand. I thought Jesse Jones' wife made weenies. I was so confused!!

@keepercjr and @catlady our chicken math is out of control. We had I think 12 chickens and ducks last year and somehow we now have 42. And now since people know we have chickens, every time one needs a home they come to us! LOL funny thing is most of them are not even laying eggs. Some are old, some are young. In addition to being the Crazy Cat and Crazy Turtle Lady, I am now the Crazy Bird Lady too.

[thoughtful]

Spoiler

 

[keepercjr]

55 minutes ago, PumaLover said:

Our chicken math is out of control. We had I think 12 chickens and ducks last year and somehow we now have 42. And now since people know we have chickens, every time one needs a home they come to us! LOL funny thing is most of them are not even laying eggs. Some are old, some are young. In addition to being the Crazy Cat and Crazy Turtle Lady, I am now the Crazy Bird Lady too.

OMG LOL.  You are clearly taking the advanced chicken math course!  One time I was chatting with your former boss (my neighbor) and he told me he like hearing our roosters crow.  I was thrown off for a second till I realized he must be talking about the egg laying call.  I don't have roosters as my hens are illegal as it is (though I would like one).  We live in a former county island so our lots are large (I have a little over 1/3 acre) and no neighbors mind thankfully.  I would honestly love to have that many chickens!  I want dairy goats too.

[Dandruff]

I suspect Bro asked how to spell "some" and got a reply of "s, o", followed by a long gap (to give him time to process), then "m, e".

[thoughtful]

Bro says "Spelling so badly that it makes no sense, that's just SO me!"

[Granwych]

4 hours ago, keepercjr said:

OMG LOL.  You are clearly taking the advanced chicken math course!  One time I was chatting with your former boss (my neighbor) and he told me he like hearing our roosters crow.  I was thrown off for a second till I realized he must be talking about the egg laying call.  I don't have roosters as my hens are illegal as it is (though I would like one).  We live in a former county island so our lots are large (I have a little over 1/3 acre) and no neighbors mind thankfully.  I would honestly love to have that many chickens!  I want dairy goats too.

My hens make the “push egg out yell” too.  Unfortunately there is one or more egg eaters out of 8 so that’s cut back on eggs for us caretakers.  Plus it’s coming into molting time. 

Sometimes I think I’d like a rooster but then common sense and local regs take over.  It’s a good thing Grampwych is firm on “8 is enough.”  I’d like some Araucanas, the ones that lay pastel hued eggs. And some lilac Orpingtons. Maybe even a few Jersey Giants.

and Pygmy goats.  And donkeys. And a horse.  Maybe a few sheep.

i’ll  see myself to the  “dream barn.”

[thoughtful]

One more!

FJ: You preach about this, you preach about that
You preach about everything under the sun
Then you misspell some words and you're making no sense,
And you're being a racist again.

When we think of the crap you spew,
Bro Gary: No, FJ! No, FJ!
FJ: And we think of the weens you chew,
Bro Gary: No, FJ!
FJ: We could barf in a pew!

Bro Gary: All I did was write “so me, so me,”
Patience bestow me, I love weens!
In the "holler" we spell like damn fools,
And we all homeskools, I love weens!

FJ: The best snark of our site
We were just fools to give to you!

Bro Gary: Alright, already, I can’t spell a damn lick
Alright, already, it's so, go know!
So so me, so me, patience bestow me. I love weens!

 

 

[keepercjr]

17 hours ago, Granwych said:

My hens make the “push egg out yell” too.  Unfortunately there is one or more egg eaters out of 8 so that’s cut back on eggs for us caretakers.  Plus it’s coming into molting time. 

Sometimes I think I’d like a rooster but then common sense and local regs take over.  It’s a good thing Grampwych is firm on “8 is enough.”  I’d like some Araucanas, the ones that lay pastel hued eggs. And some lilac Orpingtons. Maybe even a few Jersey Giants.

and Pygmy goats.  And donkeys. And a horse.  Maybe a few sheep.

i’ll  see myself to the  “dream barn.”

I had a blue Orpington.. a real on from a breeder.  She was so fluffy and gorgeous.  A dramatic difference from a buff Orpington I got from the hatchery.   All of my chickens, except the first 3 i ever got, have been from breeders, usually purchased as eggs that I hatched.  I did hatch trader Joe's fertile eggs once though!  I currently have a Rhode Island Red and 2 "Easter Egger" sisters who lay a blue/green egg.  I had a Cream Legbar who laid a true blue egg.  I also had an "Olive Egger" who laid a green egg.  Oh and a blue copper Marans who laid a very dark brown egg, usually with speckles.  That chicken (Polly) was a major bitch to those under her in the pecking order.  She was so talkative and friendly with us though.   The most prolific layers have been the Rhode Island Red and a Barred Rock.  Such workhorses!

[Dandruff]

20 hours ago, Granwych said:

My hens make the “push egg out yell” too.  Unfortunately there is one or more egg eaters out of 8 so that’s cut back on eggs for us caretakers.

Some chickens are cannibals?

[Granwych]

1 hour ago, Dandruff said:

Some chickens are cannibals?

Unfortunately they will eat eggs. And if one of the flock is sick or bleeding, yup, she'll most likely be pecked on, too.  

3 hours ago, keepercjr said:

I had a blue Orpington.. a real on from a breeder.  She was so fluffy and gorgeous.  A dramatic difference from a buff Orpington I got from the hatchery.   All of my chickens, except the first 3 i ever got, have been from breeders, usually purchased as eggs that I hatched.  I did hatch trader Joe's fertile eggs once though!  I currently have a Rhode Island Red and 2 "Easter Egger" sisters who lay a blue/green egg.  I had a Cream Legbar who laid a true blue egg.  I also had an "Olive Egger" who laid a green egg.  Oh and a blue copper Marans who laid a very dark brown egg, usually with speckles.  That chicken (Polly) was a major bitch to those under her in the pecking order.  She was so talkative and friendly with us though.   The most prolific layers have been the Rhode Island Red and a Barred Rock.  Such workhorses!

I am going to make note of your breeds.  If and when I can get more ladies, I'll see about some of the breeds you mention.  I went with buff Orpingtons after reading (and reading and reading some more) because they are supposed to be cold hardy.  Their coop wasn't heated last year, and they all made it through.  I did have to keep up with changing frozen drinkers every morning, but If be checking the ladies anyway.

 

Sorry to keep up the thread drift!   I could babble on about chickens all day.

 

 

 

[catlady]

When my first three hens were younger, one of them would occasionally eat the eggs.  I read somewhere that this might help:  blow out an egg and use a syringe* to inject the shell with a tablespoon of mustard.  Roll it around to coat the inside, and put it in the nest.  Most chickens don’t like mustard, so after a few times of pecking decoys and getting a mouth full of something bad, they should develop an aversion.  

Mine stopped after a few weeks, so I don’t know if the mustard worked or it just never became a habit.  

* you can get a cooking syringe at Walmart for under $10. 

ETA:

@Granwych, we don’t heat our coop either, but we do run an outdoor extension cord out there for a heated drinker. If you can safely get a cord to your coop, this might be an option.  We also keep a tarp over the windward side of the coop and give them a lot of hay to nest in, and we feed them cooked corn every day.  They’ve done well since 2011, and we’ve had a few brutal winters since then.

Edited September 21, 2019 by catlady

[mango_fandango]

Looks like Bro Gary’s followers aren’t fans of pink weens.

 

Spoiler

 

Spoiler

 

[keepercjr]

4 hours ago, catlady said:

, we don’t heat our coop either, but we do run an outdoor extension cord out there for a heated drinker. If you can safely get a cord to your coop, this might be an option.  We also keep a tarp over the windward side of the coop and give them a lot of hay to nest in, and we feed them cooked corn every day.  They’ve done well since 2011, and we’ve had a few brutal winters since then.
 

We don't heat our coop but we only to freezing or below a handful of times each winter.  Chickens are much tougher than people think.  If you pick up a roosting chicken you can feel how warm their feet are.  Honestly heat is tougher on them than cold. 

[Granwych]

8 minutes ago, keepercjr said:

We don't heat our coop but we only to freezing or below a handful of times each winter.  Chickens are much tougher than people think.  If you pick up a roosting chicken you can feel how warm their feet are.  Honestly heat is tougher on them than cold. 

My rabbits prefer the cold too.  Grampwych moved their hutch and enclosed run so that the bunnies get shade from a tree in the summer but get sunshine in winter.  when temps get high I put a low pan of ice in the run.  Their coats are coming in thicker now for winter, time to get some straw for their nest box.

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

Bro is an absolute idiot!  Someone once said to look at how stupid the average person is and remember 50 % are even worse.  Bro and friends are the bottom one %

Spoiler

this happened in Winston Salem where our friend Annette is from.

Edited September 22, 2019 by Don'tlikekoolaid
Spelling

[keepercjr]

9 minutes ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Bro is an absolute idiot!  Someone once said to look at how stupid the average person is and remember 50 % are even worse.  Bro and friends are the bottom one %

  Hide contents

this happened in Winston Salem where our friend Annette is from.

I get what Bro was saying but he makes it so hard.  And what does a guy pulling a knife on Bro's brother have to do with standing up for your rights and "AMERICA people to to quit Letting those out of this country not be in office"?

[AmazonGrace]

I take it the guy with the knife represented an ethnicity Gary doesn't like?

Ok folks you need to climb on them voting poles.

[thoughtful]

Gary, even a remote attempt at writing words that make sense would be appreciated. But I think I got it:

"My family was out at McDonalds today and this guy was taking too long, and my brother was getting a high chair. There was a guy there (?) who was breaking in line, and pulled out a knife."

"You can't even go anywhere any more, not knowing what might happen. You can't take your family anywhere without the possibility of someone not coming home."

"But, since it was a knife (all I can think is that he means 'rather than a gun') we probably won't hear anything on the news. We need to stand up for our rights. We need to vote. American people need to quit letting those not from this country be in office."

Of course, the story still doesn't make sense.

What's your point, Gary?  Are you outraged because someone should have had a gun to defend you all against the man with the knife? Do you think that liberal voters have prevented you from being able to have a gun in McDonalds (I sorta doubt it, in North Carolina, but don't feel like looking up the laws right now).

Are you upset because a violent SOB pulled a weapon in McDonalds? I would be, too, but I don't think the way you vote would help -- it's likely to do the opposite, in fact.

The "you can't even _______ anymore" rant always chaps my ass. There have been dangerous people in the world as long as there have been people. I'm older than you Gary, and I guarantee you the Good Old Days never existed.

Gary, I doubt that whoever you think shouldn't be elected (anyone brown, not Christian or whose ancestors didn't come from Europe, I guess) caused a man to pull a knife in McDonalds.

 

[Granwych]

16 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

I take it the guy with the knife represented an ethnicity Gary doesn't like?

Ok folks you need to climb on them voting poles.

Nobody wants to see me climbing on a pole unless it’s for a much needed laugh.  

Gary, Gary, Gary.  I often wonder if you’re smart enough to tie your shoes.  Nah, there are adult styles available that utilize Velcro instead of laces.

[wallysmommy]

Thank you for the translation of the illiterate ramblings of Bro. Gary.

[thoughtful]

Sure enough (perhaps I should say "sho 'nuff"), someone posted:

?  

I never touch the poop, but I am incredibly tempted to post something about "those damned foreigners -- you can't even understand them! Why can't they learn to speak English?"

 

Edited September 23, 2019 by thoughtful
ETA longer version of the idiotic and dangerous conversation

[Dana723]

3 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Bro is an absolute idiot!  Someone once said to look at how stupid the average person is and remember 50 % are even worse.  Bro and friends are the bottom one %

  Hide contents

this happened in Winston Salem where our friend Annette is from.

I would have paid good money to hear Bro asking for McWeenies.

[keepercjr]

@thoughtful yep it looks like ol Johnny thinks Gary should have used a gun to take care of the guy with a knife.  I agree that maybe the guy was brown otherwise why the rant about people not born here?  Also I think he meant that his brother was getting a high chair and the knife guy thought he was cutting in line so pulled out his knife. 

Yes Gary, if there was no police report or sensational story then we won’t hear about it on the news.  Were the police called?  Did the guy get arrested?  Were the news stations called?  If no, the of course it won’t be on the news!

Also, I just looked it up and in NC anyone who has ever been convicted of a felony can’t possess a gun so he can’t legally have a gun even if he wanted one.  Doesn’t mean he doesn’t have one but it is against the law.