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Dillards 78: Taste the Rainbow


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I gotta say I'm impressed w/Jill right now. I don't like her, I think she's really annoying but damn! Go Jill. It seems like little by little she's finding her way out of the fundie bubble. I'm not saying she's going to end up a full on feminist, pro-choice, LGBT+ ally, but who knows what the future holds. 

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1 hour ago, AtlanticTug said:

Looks like Derick has a job clerking for the Arkansas AG.

Very good position to land. It also tells me that his grades must be decent and he presents well in interviews.

Definitely unexpected.

Where did you see that? That would be a great position to have. I looked it up and it would appear that Arkansas’s AG is a woman. Maybe being in that environment is what changed his mind about Jill becoming governor if she wanted to. 

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31 minutes ago, JanasTattooParlor said:

Where did you see that? That would be a great position to have. I looked it up and it would appear that Arkansas’s AG is a woman. Maybe being in that environment is what changed his mind about Jill becoming governor if she wanted to. 

It's on his LinkedIn.

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Jill has come a long way in the past couple of years. I did at one point worry about her, Derick and the boy's but they seem to be doing good just now and as much as I dislike Derick, I wish him well. 

She may never be a liberal pro LGBTQ person but the fact she is posting things like this in a culture where abuse is so common and it's accepted brings me at least some hope that she teaches Izzy and Sam and any future children that abuse is not acceptable. Jill a few years ago was defending her bother for the sexual abuse she suffered by him, I don't doubt they have forgiven him and still love Josh but I wonder if they were ever allowed to express their true feelings and anger over the abuse. 

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Amazing what no longer having a fall back easy money TVEEE show does for one’s common sense, decision making skills and sensibilities.

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Wow I must give credit to Jill. She is very right about the most dangerous time being when the abused attempt to leave. That was drilled into our heads over and over at my women's shelter training.

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8 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

Jill has come a long way in the past couple of years. I did at one point worry about her, Derick and the boy's but they seem to be doing good just now and as much as I dislike Derick, I wish him well. 

She may never be a liberal pro LGBTQ person but the fact she is posting things like this in a culture where abuse is so common and it's accepted brings me at least some hope that she teaches Izzy and Sam and any future children that abuse is not acceptable. Jill a few years ago was defending her bother for the sexual abuse she suffered by him, I don't doubt they have forgiven him and still love Josh but I wonder if they were ever allowed to express their true feelings and anger over the abuse. 

When I read the narcissist quiz she posted I wondered if she was referencing Josh/Anna. Fascinating stuff really, since we know there’s a lot of abuse - child & domestic that is covered up in fundie land. Because of who she is, if posting as she did about domestic violence gives even one woman the courage to seek help, then Jill deserves kudos in my book. 

Let’s not forget that Jill was outed as a victim of Josh’s molestation early in her marriage and that she was paraded on TV parroting her parent’s line that all was hunky dory in Duggarland. She was young, she was the victim of abuse and rather than protecting her, her parents forced her to forgive and live with her abuser, she was a sister mom expected to be a parent when her parents should have still been parenting her. 

 

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I'm not quite ready to have faith in the new, improved Jill, though I hope her post helps people.  Can't help but wonder if she tried to discourage Derick when he was posting about Jazz.  I suspect his internship came about as a result of Duggar political connections and that Derick and Jill are looking for positive PR for when he graduates.

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I'm impressed with Jill, for the most part what she posted seemed on point. 

As for Wreck, the AG seems to be a fan of Trump so while I'm impressed that his grades/interview skills made him a decent candidate I'm sure that this is just a nice incubator for his hateful views. 

I'm not sure how excited I am for the Dills tbh. Jills post earned her some points but Wrecks clerking isn't super surprising nor was her going to that tea. 

Remember the Duggars have always promoted political engagement and the girls even had a whole chapter in their book dedicated to voting etc and talking about campainging for strong values candidates. Unless they achieve Gilead I dont think the Duggars are anti women voting or even anti women in politics. I think they are anti voting Left and anti *democrats* in politics. 

I'm sure they had no issues with Sarah Sanders, Sarah Palin etc. 

 

ETA improved phrasing. 

Edited by LacyMay
Fixed poor wording.
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18 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

I don't doubt they have forgiven him and still love Josh but I wonder if they were ever allowed to express their true feelings and anger over the abuse

I doubt the forgiveness was sincere. I mean, one can forgive the worst things, but only when the person is free to feel, free to think and free to decide. Jill was forced to swallow her anger, show love for her molestor and shut up. A victim under those circumstances cannot forgive.

So, in my opinion, only Jill as a free and independent adult, having had some distance with Josh, can decide to forgive. It is said that forgiving makes the victim feel better and stronger, so if it is true, I hope that moment arrives. But only to give Jill peace, not to make Josh feel better.

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Derrick’s internship is a really good opportunity and will look good on a resume, especially if he wants a job there after graduation. Since he only finished his first year of law school he will likely just be doing research and writing memos of what he has found. At least Derrick won’t be allowed to be lazy in this internship. He will have to work hard there and I think he needs that push to cultivate a work ethic in the working world.

I think Jill may now think differently about domestic violence, if she ever really thought about it previously, because it’s different when something happens to someone you care about. Her friend being abused may have  forced her to really look at more angles of the situation than she ever thought about and, if she knew the abuser as well, it was probably a shock that something like this happened to what she probably considered the perfect, Christian couple. 

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9 minutes ago, socalrules said:

Derrick’s internship is a really good opportunity and will look good on a resume, especially if he wants a job there after graduation. Since he only finished his first year of law school he will likely just be doing research and writing memos of what he has found. At least Derrick won’t be allowed to be lazy in this internship. He will have to work hard there and I think he needs that push to cultivate a work ethic in the working world.

I think Jill may now think differently about domestic violence, if she ever really thought about it previously, because it’s different when something happens to someone you care about. Her friend being abused may have  forced her to really look at more angles of the situation than she ever thought about and, if she knew the abuser as well, it was probably a shock that something like this happened to what she probably considered the perfect, Christian couple. 

I think Jill is thinking about a lot of things now, and I'm guessing that is the big point of contention between her & JB and other family members.  Derrick was likely taught critical thinking skills in college, as I think most universities require it to graduate (at least mind did and the ones my kids are attended do) , and I do think he's giving Jill "lessons" on thinking outside the box and to look at situations as more than black or white or right or wrong.   

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I don’t keep up with their personal comings and goings too much, but I wonder if they’re attending a conservative evangelical church rather than a fundie baptist church? Because everything Jill posted is in line with the evangelical Christian response to domestic abuse (which is taught as a valid reason for divorce, along with the reasons given in the Bible explicitly).

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2 hours ago, adidas said:

I don’t keep up with their personal comings and goings too much, but I wonder if they’re attending a conservative evangelical church rather than a fundie baptist church? Because everything Jill posted is in line with the evangelical Christian response to domestic abuse (which is taught as a valid reason for divorce, along with the reasons given in the Bible explicitly).

They attend Cross Church (I believe the Springdale campus.) It was Derick’s Church before they were married. The Duggars are linked to it too though - I believe the rental house they were in prior to the TTH was owned by Cross Church and I also believe JimBob’s High School (Shiloh) was operated or associated with Cross too. 

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7 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

They attend Cross Church (I believe the Springdale campus.) It was Derick’s Church before they were married. The Duggars are linked to it too though - I believe the rental house they were in prior to the TTH was owned by Cross Church and I also believe JimBob’s High School (Shiloh) was operated or associated with Cross too. 

I don't think the rest of the Duggar clan is actively involved in Cross church. It's too progressive for them. 

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8 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

I don't think the rest of the Duggar clan is actively involved in Cross church. It's too progressive for them. 

Yes, I agree. The general family does have a history with the Church though. So it might not have been a big culture shock or anything when Jill first started attending there with her husband and kids.

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Don't the Duggars have connections all over Arkansas? Being associated with a Duggar probably landed Wreck that job moreso than qualifications. They hired someone who openly harassed a minor online. It says a lot about that AG, frankly.

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On 7/13/2019 at 7:45 PM, Yaoichan12 said:

In K-12 school, every adult was Mr. Or Ms. 

Get to college and called my very first professor Ms. And the next day she lectured our small class about how she didn't spend x amount of years getting master's and doctorate to be called Ms. It was Professor or Dr. 

I know I am super late to this conversation and it has probably moved on. We were moving the past couple of week, but I have to share a story relating to this. I had this with a teacher in high school. That particular year I had two teacher with Dr. titles. We all thought that was cool and that we were cool by extension getting to call them Dr. Lastname, so issue with us. The one teacher was so relaxed about it, never cared, told us to call her whatever (very strange in an American High School in the south in my experience). The other teacher (who we had in a previous year) would get very upset when the office would buzz the room over the intercom for something. Without fail it went like this every time:
Intercom: " Mrs. Lastname can you send Student to the office?"
Teacher: "This is Dr. Lastname. Yes I can, they are on the their way"

I really think the secretary in the office did this on purpose, which I don't blame them for, this woman was so far up her rear end that it was annoying to be in her class. We had her as a teacher 3 times (unheard of at my school) and halfway through our 3rd year she got divorced. WOW talk about a mellowing out. She was almost fun and enjoyable after that. Honestly, I understand that it was a lot of work to get that degree, but calm down.

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13 minutes ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

I really think the secretary in the office did this on purpose, which I don't blame them for, this woman was so far up her rear end that it was annoying to be in her class. We had her as a teacher 3 times (unheard of at my school) and halfway through our 3rd year she got divorced. WOW talk about a mellowing out. She was almost fun and enjoyable after that. Honestly, I understand that it was a lot of work to get that degree, but calm down.

Probably has a cranky stress reaction (I know I do).

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I would be shocked if the intern coordinator with the AG's office saw the name Derick Dillard and made a decision to hire him based on him being married to a Duggar. Sure, knowing people can help you get internships, but Jim Bob is not and frankly hasn't ever been super well-connected politically. He had his weird little circle 20ish years ago? They aren't big donors, they don't host fundraisers. They can get attention to an issue, like the transgender bathroom bill robocall Michelle did. But they are not regularly rubbing elbows with the AR political class. The AG wouldn't really gain anything by having a Duggar in-law (who doesn't seem to be close to the Duggars!) in their office for a semester. And it wouldn't surprise me at all if they didn't google their interns.

I'd also to note that you don't always get the luxury of agreeing politically 100% when you work in the government. I have no idea what kind of duties Derick would have in his first summer at the AG's office, but I know several democratic friends who worked for the democratic Missouri AG and didn't agree with many of the initiatives of the office (like the aggressive death penalty stance). I interned in the Missouri House of Reps for a rural blue dog democrat. I'm a lot more liberal than him, but I learned a ton. I later worked for a politician who was more liberal than me and who I didn't always agree with on an issue. But I had an amazing time working for him. Derick likely agrees mostly with the office because he is a republican, but it's just a summer internship.

I just think there isn't much going on for the Dillards, so there is a lot of projection and speculation. He secured a smart internship. Who knows if the person in the AG's office reviewing apps knew his name? Who knows if Derick wanted to work at the AG's specifically because he believes exactly the same things, or if he applied at a bunch of places and this made the most sense educationally and financially? 

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15 hours ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

I know I am super late to this conversation and it has probably moved on. We were moving the past couple of week, but I have to share a story relating to this. I had this with a teacher in high school. That particular year I had two teacher with Dr. titles. We all thought that was cool and that we were cool by extension getting to call them Dr. Lastname, so issue with us. The one teacher was so relaxed about it, never cared, told us to call her whatever (very strange in an American High School in the south in my experience). The other teacher (who we had in a previous year) would get very upset when the office would buzz the room over the intercom for something. Without fail it went like this every time:
Intercom: " Mrs. Lastname can you send Student to the office?"
Teacher: "This is Dr. Lastname. Yes I can, they are on the their way"

I really think the secretary in the office did this on purpose, which I don't blame them for, this woman was so far up her rear end that it was annoying to be in her class. We had her as a teacher 3 times (unheard of at my school) and halfway through our 3rd year she got divorced. WOW talk about a mellowing out. She was almost fun and enjoyable after that. Honestly, I understand that it was a lot of work to get that degree, but calm down.

If her marriage was going south the whole time, maybe being called “Mrs” Lastname just grated on her, and “Dr” Lastname was easier to swallow. 

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Jill’s post is actually really progressive for a Duggar 

I remember when the Duggars endorsed Bill Gothard’s website on theirs. He had worksheets that specifically discouraged spouses from divorcing if they were being abused. 

 

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35 minutes ago, Lillymuffin said:

If her marriage was going south the whole time, maybe being called “Mrs” Lastname just grated on her, and “Dr” Lastname was easier to swallow. 

The thing that just occurred to me is that a man with a doctorate would never have been addressed  as Mr Lastname in a professional situation.  I can see why that would irritate this teacher.

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