Duggars and the Buddy System

[Daenerys]

Michelle has vaguely alluded to the Buddy System on numerous occasions, but has never actually gone into detail about it. Who is buddied with who? Clearly it's Jennifer-Jill and Josie-Jana, but it seems less obvious for the others. I also wonder at what point a child is considered too old to have a dedicated buddy - was Jackson bumped off to make room for Josie or do some of the J'Slaves have more than one? Also, it doesn't seem Joy has a buddy despite being older than the others when they would have started.

 

Can anyone explain this in more detail?

[Letgo]

Yes, here are the teams:

Jana has Jason and Jackson

Jil has Joy-Anna, James, and Jennifer

Jessa has Jeremiah, Justin, and Jordyn

Jinger has Jedidiah and Johannah

I would guess that Josie has now been added to Jana's team, but I have not seen any official announcement. Also, I would guess that Joy, Jed, and Jer ought to be able to handle getting dressed, fed, etc. by themselves now. Joy probably would have gotten Josie had she not been a micro premie.

[amster]

I thought Jill had Josie? Wasn't it Jill who stayed behind with J'chelle in Israel when Josie got sick?

[AnnoDomini]

And what does the 'buddy system' actually do? What's it for? How is it implemented? What's the point?

Pardon all the questions--I have never come across such a thing among all the fundies that I, well, didn't know know, but knew of, observed, around me.

[FemaleScientist]

The buddy system is a way for Michelle to have her oldest J'slaves, the girls, take care and raise her "little ones" so she doesn't have to. I'm assuming Michelle assigns the teams, and I'm sure it prepares the J'slaves for a life of homemaking.

[Guest Anonymous]

The buddy system is a way for Michelle to have her oldest J'slaves, the girls, take care and raise her "little ones" so she doesn't have to. I'm assuming Michelle assigns the teams, and I'm sure it prepares the J'slaves for a life of homemaking.

It is an incredibly lazy way to parent, but how the hell can ya manage a litter without some slaves, er I mean help.

[formergothardite]

About 4:20 Michelle explains the buddy system. It leaves one wondering what exactly the parents do for the kids. And her face when talking about when she weans and tosses the baby to an older child is kind of strange. It is like as she is saying it some part of her realizes how crappy it sounds.

[bananacat]

And of course none of the older boys have buddies. They used to, when there weren't enough older girls to parent all the siblings. Michelle will do whatever she has to to avoid caring for a child over the age of 6 months.

[Trynn]

About 4:20 Michelle explains the buddy system. It leaves one wondering what exactly the parents do for the kids. And her face when talking about when she weans and tosses the baby to an older child is kind of strange. It is like as she is saying it some part of her realizes how crappy it sounds.

That girl helping the boy take off his coat looks WAY too young to have to be doing that sort of thing.

[Buzzard]

Its a lazy way to parent and an easy way to train the girls to be moms slaves and submit to their younger male siblings

[xReems]

Michelle's reasoning behind is that "mom cannot be everywhere at one time", so she has the buddy system to help with that. In other words, "I cannot raise my own children without the help of my older ones but I'm going to continue to pop babies out of my kaslopus because I have my older children who can help me raise my younger ones. God knows what I can and cannot handle, therefore, I will continue to accept his little rewards since I have EVERYTHING under control."

The same applies for Gil and Kelly Bates.

[Letgo]

The older Duggar children were very young when the buddy system began. But when a family has that many children it is kind of a necessity. I had an aunt who was the second child and oldest girl of thirteen children. She had only one child when she married because she had already raised a family. Her words. The older children in large families have greater responsibilites. The Duggars just organized it well and took it to an extreme. Wasn't even Josh a buddy at some point, too? To Joseph or Josiah? To the Duggars and other mega families this system is probably just excellent training for the girls to learn to be mothers.

Older buddies get the little ones up in the morning, help them dress, wash, brush teeth, change their diapers if still in them, and get/serve meals. They get them ready for outings; coats, shoes, carseats, diaper bags, bottles, and are in charge of watching them when out and about. In addition to the buddy jobs, the older girls also cook, clean, organize, do the laundry, supervise the online school work, and watch the children. Michelle nurses the youngest child until it is around 6 months old, at which point she is either pregnant or trying to be. The baby then goes to its buddy. I am not sure what Michelle does all day. I know she must do something because several times I have heard one of the older girls say that the house runs better or things go more smoothly when she is there. And they were unsolicited comments. Maybe she does pitch in if one of the older girls needs help with her buddies or jurisdiction.

[bananacat]

I can only imagine Michelle Duggar walking around the house and pretending to work for the camera. She makes me think of Zoolander when he went to work in the coal mines and just posed all day without doing anything. So Michelle will go into the kitchen and hold up a spatula and smile. I don't know what she does when the cameras aren't around, but I wouldn't be surprised if it involves a lot of mirror preening and/or obedience training.

[marmalade]

I thought Jill had Josie? Wasn't it Jill who stayed behind with J'chelle in Israel when Josie got sick?

I think Jill might actually have more education than Jana (maybe she really HAS gone to a brick and mortar school for a biology class!). They're apparently both trained as first responders, so that's all I've got, unless Jana was scheduled to go on another Gothard retreat or Journey to the Heart to pound her into the dust one last time to make sure the indoctrination sticks before they marry her off.

[SheWoreLemon]

Remember that one episode where one of the middle boys (pretty sure it was Jackson) was lugging Jordyn(?) down the stairs at one point--she was halfway falling out of his arms. Michelle said that Jackson was thrilled when Jordyn was born because it was finally his turn to be a buddy, though in reality, Jessa helped him with most of the work.

(Switch all J names as appropriate--I can't keep them all straight).

[AnnoDomini]

Its a lazy way to parent and an easy way to train the girls to be moms slaves and submit to their younger male siblings

UGH! Catch me 'submitting' or in any way under authority of my younger (or even older, if I had them) brothers. If they're related to me and I have at any time in their lives seen their hoo-hoo, I will never acknowledge any kind of authority they think they might have over me. Though thankfully mine don't have dumb ideas like that. They, I think, know me well enough.