Lori Alexander 68: June Gloom Has Arrived

[quiversR4hunting]

On 7/9/2019 at 9:41 PM, Sarah92 said:

I've had to have some serious talks with my parents recently on them getting their financial crap together to make sure everything is in order. Might as well do it while they're in their 50s instead of just waiting  

I can't imagine what some of these woman would do if their husband took care of all the finances and then died. Are their names even on the accounts?

Side story: My grandfather just passed and as far as we know there was no will. That means everything technically goes to his second wife and then eventually her children, his step kids. That leaves my mother totally cut out of everything, everything that belonged to her family just gone because my grandfather didn't get a will in place or think of his own blood children. That's what happens when everyone isn't on board and up to date. 

My SO and I are going through this with his mom and step-dad. They lied to all of us and said they had a will started. nope, they just grabbed paperwork from an attorney. My SO went over to their house and set up a legal zoom account and filled it out exactly how they wanted it, they wouldn't print it and sign it. Both are in their 70s and both have had open heart surgery and are diabetic. ugh! 

On 7/9/2019 at 9:28 PM, feministxtian said:

Yeah, well I'm fucked in that submission shit. I've been making "command" decisions for a week now. 3 different medical teams, nurses, all that shit, making home health arrangements with the VA, and not once have I "asked" hubs a damn thing. We did have one serious discussion about something because he was coherent enough to talk about it...but the rest...it's all me baby.

What would Lori's followers do if their husbands were debilitated like my hub? They'd end up killing him because they wouldn't dare make a fucking decision. It's a stupid way of life, utterly useless, counterproductive, and quite possibly deadly. 

EXACTLY! I am the daughter-in-law and I am setting up all new doctors, dentist, eye, etc so they can move closer to a family member for help. I can't wait for my husband to make the decision, he is working on the sale of their house, the inspections on the new place, finding an attorney for a will, etc. (And you have been my thoughts through all that you are going through with your husband.)

On 7/10/2019 at 12:26 PM, Cora Persephona said:

Hmm, it seems I was wrong and she has a topic for almost every day of the week:

Modest Monday,

Training-Children Tuesday, 

Women-Ruin-Everything Wednesday, 

Terrible-Food Thursday, 

Feminist Friday,

Stay-at-Home Saturday

Submit Sunday

I love this! I changed the format so everyone can really read your awesome Lori Alexander Days of the Week! 

[SongRed7]

I was going to pull a Ken and write a wall of words about her fat shaming once again today. But I will leave it at this:

Lori is the meanest woman on the planet. Not one kind bone in that woman. 

 

[Lgirlrocks]

We eat a lot of processed foods in the country and don’t do a lot of walking or bicycle riding like other countries do. It’s not always how much you eat it’s what you eat. ( I am not shaming anyone, I’m currently over weight and have no room to talk.) 

Spoiler

Lori what you do is starve yourself. You probably don’t workout or walk much on a daily bases. It’s not healthy. You can’t over come a thyroid issue just by eating less. That is not how it works. You have to take medication to regulate things and that can be a trial and error process. 

Also some women may be over weight from carrying 10+ kids with no down tome between pregnancies to try and take off weight. Not everyone can be like Alyssa bates Webster. She seems to get thinner after having a baby. 

[Liza]

 

 

Edited July 11, 2019 by Liza

[feministxtian]

57 minutes ago, Liza said:

 

 

Say what???? I would think us "liberal" women would be far more choosy about a future mate. 

[Alisamer]

1 hour ago, Liza said:

 

 

What does that even mean?

Besides "this dude can't get laid and is mad about it", I mean.

[FullOfGravy]

2 hours ago, Liza said:

 

 

Say what?  Liberal woman here, not interested in being at anyone's mercy, thank you very much.  Maybe I'm at the mercy of my government, in a way, but my government is a collection of men and women, voted in by a male and female electorate, and yes, I'm grateful to the suffragettes who fought for that.  And unlike the fundie ideal of marriage, if I feel that my government is abusing its power over me, I won't just sit there and pray and try to be even more submissive - I'll protest, or volunteer on an opposition candidate's campaign, and I'll vote for someone else next time.

[SongRed7]

2 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

Lori what you do is starve yourself. You probably don’t workout or walk much on a daily bases. It’s not healthy. You can’t over come a thyroid issue just by eating less. That is not how it works.

This really struck a nerve with because I'm currently dealing with some sort of thyroid/metabolic disorder issue related to my weight.   I am 55 years old and have been struggling with extra 35-40 pounds I gained after I went thru menopause at age 47.  The frustrating part is that I am active and watch my diet to a T.  I was with my doctor last week. I have 6 months of data (truthful data, not made up) I work out every single day-- twice a day three times a week...hard work out -- running, step aerobics, cross training classes, weight lifting.  I have all the data saved on my smart watch which measures my actual exercise and calories burned. I'm burning between 500-850 calories from intense exercise every single day.   I also watch my food intake religiously and track on Myfitness pal.   My typical diet is between 1250-1400 calories per day (not counting special occasions or holidays when it goes a bit higher.)   I can't tell you how sick I am of boring salad with chicken on top. 

Despite ALL OF THIS, my weight doesn't budge more than one pound. I am fit but fat.  On paper this doesn't make sense. I have a good doctor who has run all kinds of tests and trying to get to the bottom of this. Something is wrong with me and we are trying to fix it. Not just so "I look good to please my husband" but so that I am a healthier version of me and I feel better. I dont' feel good with this extra weight. 

So when I read things like Lori is posting, and she tells people like me I'm a glutton, or I'm lazy because I just don't try hard enough or I don't care enough or I'm not Godly enough, I literally want to go to the nearest bridge and jump off  she makes me feel so bad about myself (and I know better than to listen to her shit) because no works harder on improving me than me.  It's not a kindly rebuke out of love. It's meanness plain and simple.  Trust me, anyone who is overweight, already knows it and doesn't need to be "rebuked/shamed."  It's not going to help.    And it's so damn frustrating.   I know I shouldn't internalize it, but she is wrong.  She doesn't know what people's issues are. Maybe some overeat, but maybe we don't know why -- it could be a million reason. But No one I know is purposely sabotaging themselves and their health just to be a rebellious, unGodly wife. NO  ONE!!

She needs to shut the hell up. Now see...I went an wrote a wall of text. 

 

[livinglongerthanyou]

 

America has an obesity problem. We all know that. Many of us don't get enough exercise, enough sleep, or enough healthy food. Americans are also stressed which increases inflammation in our bodies and changes how our bodies work. We eat a lot of processed food that is high in bad carbs. 

However consider this.....and I'm directing this to you Ken since I know you read here. Forty million Americans, including 12 million children, experience food insecurity daily. That's 1 in 8 people. Food insecurity is not only being unsure where your next meal may come from, it's also a lack of access to the kind of food that contributes to health - good proteins, fruits, veggies and complex carbs. These are people who are coping with the poverty diet. Money is tight and bellies need to be filled and so there is a lot of pasta, white rice, potatoes and processed food. 

The poverty diet has repercussions. Weight gain. Fatigue. Potential for pre-diabetes. Children's brains not getting the protein needed for healthy development. 

Ken, your 98% statistic that you just pulled out of your ass is bullshit. You and Lori are so completely entitled that you have no understanding of what is happening beyond your gated community or your Door County summer home. Volunteering somewhere that would have your rubbing shoulders with actual poor people would do you both a world of good. But I know that would never, ever happen.

[hollyfeller]

When fundie worlds collide!!  (Ken has blocked me so I can't see his response in between these two comments.  I'm sure it adds nothing to the conversation.)

[Alisamer]

Oh lord. I'm about to get in the car, but somebody should go post Lori's stuff in the Gwen thread so we can see what Gwenhovah posts as a "devotional" in a day or two - maybe Gwen will check out Lori's food posts and go on about how organic isn't any more Godly than diet coke, and one bite of a brownie is better than a cat food salad!

[ColeJo]

Just like Lori can't have a nuanced discussion about her interpretation of God's Word, she can't have a nuanced discussion about obesity, exercise, and nutrition. She would have to use critical thinking, which isn't her strong suit.

Sometimes, people don't live in areas that are safe enough for their children to play outside. There is also having access to affordable, healthy foods. Your average convenience store will have a limited selection. I am grateful that my community is working to solve this through a mobile farmers market and other programs. My church at least provides dinner on Wednesday nights.

Some eating issues are psychological, so it is possible that one can't simply stop. The root cause needs to be addressed.

I have PCOS and it took weight loss surgery to get a handle on my weight. Being over 300 at age 18 is not good. Before my surgery, I was 328 and now I am 190. I do not mind staying here for a while because I need to get enough nutrients and stuff.

[louisa05]

9 minutes ago, ColeJo said:

 

Some eating issues are psychological, so it is possible that one can't simply stop. The root cause needs to be addressed.

 

I know someone who literally sits and eats snack food and small candies (think chips, crackers, M&Ms, Skittles, etc...) non-stop and seems totally unaware that she is consuming anything. I have watched her eat an entire box of crackers and while putting some in her mouth say to everyone in the room, "What do we want to do for dinner? I haven't had anything to eat since breakfast." 

This woman also has about ten million signs of severe anxiety. But she goes to an evangelical mega-church and believes that she can pray away the anxiety so she refuses to get help. Her spouse has tried to get her to talk to her doctor about anxiety or see a therapist.  Others have tried, too. She refuses. God can solve it for her. And then she keeps mindlessly eating. And I'm pretty sure the eating has nothing to do with the food. 

And f*cking Lori Alexander would likely tell her that she's right and God can fix it. Well, he hasn't yet. And as a practicing Catholic, I believe He can. Because He gave people the ability to invent the right medications and develop the right therapies. But she has to go get that. God doesn't wave a magic wand and fix any illness. Mental or physical. 

[wallysmommy]

Lori saw a person that she deemed overweight eat a sandwich and she was offended, therefore, she had to say it was sinful.  That's her "purpose" in one sentence.  Fill in the blank.  Lori saw a person ________ and she was offended, therefore, she had to say it was sinful.

[SilverBeach]

9 hours ago, klein_roeschen said:

What if the headship likes his helpmeet plump and curvy? There are plenty of men out there who like heavier women. Should she start loosing weight no matter what her husband likes because of the sin of being overweight or should she stay that way because he likes her that way? I personally will ponder that question while munching a cookie and Lori can kiss my overweight butt.

Yes! Mr. SB definitely prefers plump women and I am so glad I am one! Fuck Lori and her skin and bones ass. 

Edited July 12, 2019 by SilverBeach

[klein_roeschen]

5 hours ago, ColeJo said:

I have PCOS and it took weight loss surgery to get a handle on my weight. Being over 300 at age 18 is not good. Before my surgery, I was 328 and now I am 190. I do not mind staying here for a while because I need to get enough nutrients and stuff.

I also had weight loss surgery, lost round about 100 lb. But what I also have is hypthyriodism and lipodema. Fat cells with lipodema are the Lori Alexander of fat cells. They are nasty, lazy and only know one way to live, and that's growing. No amount of exercise, dieting or even starving yourself will shrink them. And it's an illness only women can get and it's more common than many think. I have it in my thighs, butt and to a lesser degree in my upper arms. The sucessfull therapy is liposuction, but even after that, the fat cells will come back years later.

And the myth about exercise more, eat less and you will loose weight easily. Totally bullshit. The human body is adabtable or humanity wouldn't had survived thousends of years full of famines. Oh, and loosing weight is the lesser problem, but preventing to lost weight to come back is the real problem.  Because with every diet your body lowers the metabolism to hold on the precious fat and want to go back to where it was.

Sorry for the rant, it's a sensitive topic for me as lifelong overweight person. I lost count on the "good minded" busy bodies who tried to tell me how unhealthy and ugly overweight me is.

[onemama]

12 hours ago, livinglongerthanyou said:

Ken, your 98% statistic that you just pulled out of your ass is bullshit. You and Lori are so completely entitled that you have no understanding of what is happening beyond your gated community or your Door County summer home. Volunteering somewhere that would have your rubbing shoulders with actual poor people would do you both a world of good. But I know that would never, ever happen

Amen to that.  The facebook commenter who expressed some dissent recommended a book called "Body Respect". I've read author Linda Bacon's first book, Health At Every Size, which is pretty much about being healthy, no matter your size, and deprioritizing weight loss in favor of healthy habits that may or may not lead to weight loss. In her second book, she delves a lot more into issues of social inequality and the repercussions this has on people's health. 

Will Ken read this book and allow his eyes to be opened?  Probably not. 

I read Lori's blog post. You're all right about her making less sense and getting meaner and meaner with every passing day.  That post is a combination of fat shaming,  shaming women for not wanting to be told to change their eating habits, adding one more area of a woman's life in which she has not agency, and giving permission to husbands to further bully their wives.  It's the opposite of encouraging and life-giving, and knowing how Lori loves her angry male readers, we know she's giving them exactly what they want to read. 

@SongRed7, I'm so sorry you are dealing with those issues! Have you read or listened to anything by Jason Fung?  He's a strong proponent of intermittent fasting as treatment for metabolic issues. He also recommends the ketogenic diet (very low carb, moderate protein, high fat).  I have no idea whether you've already tried this, whether your doctor would recommend it, but it seems to help many people.  Feel free to discard this advice, by the way. While Jason Fung is a doctor, I'm not!  I hope you get to the bottom of whatever it is and you can get to a place where you are comfortable with your weight and can relax a bit more around food. A cyber-hug to you. 

12 hours ago, ColeJo said:

Just like Lori can't have a nuanced discussion about her interpretation of God's Word, she can't have a nuanced discussion about obesity, exercise, and nutrition. She would have to use critical thinking, which isn't her strong suit.

Exactly! 

On a tangent here, does Lori think about how stupid her comment section on Facebook looks to an outsider? She keeps deleting comments and leaving up responses to those comments, basically destroying the conversation.  She's crazy. 

And one last thing. I'm amazed that these comments are still up under her facebook post about women tearing other women's marriages down. Go Jesse! 

Quote

 Isn't it interesting that talking too much is declared to be a bad thing for a woman, but being the ONLY one to talk is fine if a man is doing the talking? The verse quoted in this blog from James 1 about being quick to listen but slow to speak only applies to women? I see no such distinction this verse. 

... This description of a home is not anything close to "peaceful." By this definition, a prison camp in which there are no revolts and only perfect obedience would also be "peaceful.

Here he calls Lori out on her hypocrisy

Quote

I agree, every couple can do whatever works for them (as long as they truly are in agreement and one isn't forcing the other against their will). Interestingly, though, the Transformed Wife herself does not agree with this, since she feels the need to raise a cry of indignation any time she hears of a couple who actually treat each other as equals 

Perfect definition of marriage a la Lori Alexander

Quote

There's a difference between "peaceful" and "without conflict." A prison camp run 100% efficiently with no revolt whatsoever is without conflict, but it's anything but peaceful.

I applaud you, Jesse, for keeping a level head and taking on Ken! 

Quote

The biggest problem here is when we judge another husband, not recognizing that he knows his wife and family best and may know exactly what is best for them. Calling this unChristian is a far stretch, especially when his own Christian wife won't call it that, and she's living with him.

Jesse: 

Quote

 

I have been careful to consider only the information I have been provided. I haven't judged his work ethic, his honesty, his relationship with God, his integrity, or anything else about him (because, as you said, I know nothing about these things). But I wonder how much more information is required to form an opinion in this case? What I do know is that, at the dinner table (a wonderful setting for families to share about their day and develop relationships with each other), he considers his own opportunity to speak uninterrupted to be more important than letting anyone else have the same opportunity. 

...I'm not sure it's unreasonable to call it unChristlike (a lot of our behavior as Christians unfortunately is, and it's good to recognize it). Jesus very clearly teaches us to consider others more important than ourselves, to lay down our lives for each other, and never to strive for the place of prominence. This instruction is to all believers, not merely to women. I see no pass given to men in the Bible to do these things. 

 

And finally

Quote

I suspect, by the way, that if a man told you nothing except that his wife makes all the decisions in their family, you would consider this to be enough information to declare it unbiblical

BINGO! 

Sorry for the length of this post.... 

[Lgirlrocks]

I have struggled with my weight since I was 13/14. I was super skinny between 10-12 when I was growing. After I stopped growing tall I started putting on weight around my middle. We grew up lower middle class so we ate a lot of processed food. Chicken nuggets and curly fries or ramen noodle soup with frozen veggies and eggs. I knew nothing about dieting and didn’t get to play sports, my dad was sick and I had no way to get to practices. After high school I lost weight by working out and eating better. I had my own money from working and a car to buy my own food. Lori’s ignorance struck a nerve because I put on over 20 lbs last year in five weeks from stress and I haven’t been able to take it off. I’ve done low carb, counting calories, eating a balanced diet, and pushing myself at the gym. It’s not as simple as eat less and the weight will come off. I’ve never had to work this hard to loose weight. 

Lori just makes everything worse! Fortunately I have a bf who loves me and sees how hard I am trying. He encourages me and loves me the way I am. I don’t need someone to tel me I’m over weight. What I need, and what most people need, is encouragement. 

[SongRed7]

3 hours ago, onemama said:

Have you read or listened to anything by Jason Fung? 

@onemama  thanks for that advice. I will check it out!  Right now my doctor is trying some thyroid meds because I have some indicators that seem to be off . 

 

Regarding today post: I see that trio of authors is back at it again “my husband, Ken, and me” lol

And I love the typo referring to the “weeding” night   Is that some other fundie ritual!!? Lol

 

 

 

Edited July 12, 2019 by SongRed7

[louisa05]

Oh, FFS.....

On the purity post on Facebook, a woman commented and some douche went off on her using a hyphenated last name and thus being a feminist. She explained that she uses it on social media only so that old classmates and such can easily find/recognize her. The douche then tells her she must remove the hyphen because it makes her appear feminist. She ended up agreeing and saying she will speak to her husband about his wishes. Ugh. 

You've got to be kidding me. 

A friend who spent years as an evangelical youth pastor and has grown away from that world now always talks about how one of the problems with that whole culture is too much "majoring on the minors". Attacking that woman for the name she uses on social media is a perfect example. 

 

[onemama]

3 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

Lori just makes everything worse!

She does. 

I'm currently listening to a book by former Weight Watchers director (of some sort...) Liz Josefsberg called "Target 100".  The plan explains the importance of sleep, hydration, stress management, exercise (not as a calorie burning tool) and movement in weight loss.  She only has one food rule: control your carb intake. 

I'm not saying this program is for everyone and I'm not saying you all have to go out there and buy the book, I'm mentioning it because it's one more book that's helping me understand the importance of overall health in my weight and the way I eat. Unlike Lori, Liz looks at a person and wants to help that person address the environmental factors that are leading him or her to overeat. Lori just points the blame finger (at women, of course).  Nobody ought to listen to Lori. She's a bitter, ugly old lady who has nothing better to do with her time than tear down every single woman she can get her nails into.  How many of her readers struggle with overeating because they aren't getting enough sleep, or they are super stressed, or they never get the chance to recover from a pregnancy? How many of these women are living on substandard diets because they don't have a car to drive to the grocery store? How many of these women have husbands (lords, in Lori's world) who fill their pantries and freezers with junk food, yet expect them to be skinny?  

Cruel Lori has a car, money and time on her hands to cook expensive food. Cruel Lori has already subjected Ken to her orthorexic eating patterns. I wish her readers would see through her and walk away. 

 

[SilverBeach]

10 hours ago, klein_roeschen said:

it's a sensitive topic for me as lifelong overweight person.

Yep, me too. 

[louisa05]

Ken and Lori's complete dismissal of the damage the purity culture has done to so many evangelical and fundamentalist people raised in it is just gross. 

Anyone else read the various things Elizabeth Smart said about how it affected her mindset when she was abducted, raped and held captive for ten months? 

Am I the only one who knows women raised in that nonsense who had difficulty with sex once they were married because of all the shame and guilt surrounding it in the teachings they got at church and from para-church organizations? 

And their assumption that it was perfectly fine for their kids is probably willful blindness. Something tells me that none of their kids would ever confide in them about any emotional baggage from the way they were raised. If they dared, I'm sure there would be hell to pay. Those kids likely learned that it was best to go along, hide their emotions and just take the verbal and emotional abuse by age 3 or 4 at the latest. 

If those two imbeciles would shut up and listen for once, they might learn that purity culture's approach to abstinence has been unhealthy for many, many people and a change is in order. And many who are calling for that change are not calling for churches to endorse premarital sex. 

 

 

 

 

[wallysmommy]

Do they go to the garden to weed on the weeding night, or do they work on Cricut or Silhouette die cut products with their weeding tool.  Everyone had their own kink, especially L & K.

 

Spoiler

 

Edited July 12, 2019 by wallysmommy

[delphinium65]

2 hours ago, louisa05 said:

Oh, FFS.....

On the purity post on Facebook, a woman commented and some douche went off on her using a hyphenated last name and thus being a feminist. She explained that she uses it on social media only so that old classmates and such can easily find/recognize her. The douche then tells her she must remove the hyphen because it makes her appear feminist. She ended up agreeing and saying she will speak to her husband about his wishes. Ugh. 

My answer to that douche's question would have been 'None of your f'ing business.'  However, wouldn't it have been well within Lori's bounds of submission to one's husband (ugh, even typing that is nauseating) to say 'That is between me and my husband, I don't have to answer to you'?    Even if one accepts submission in marriage, that doesn't mean she has to submit to every misogynistic asshole who flocks to Lori's page, but the Ungodly Mentor probably would have banned her anyway for daring to disagree with one of her favorite men.  

6 minutes ago, wallysmommy said:

...do they work on Cricut or Silhouette die cut products with their weeding tool...

I use a straight pin for weeding, I find it works better than the weeding tool for me.  

Edited July 12, 2019 by delphinium65
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