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Timetraveler

Mrs Midwest

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Timetraveler

She blogs and uploads videos about 'femininity' and how you can achieve the ultimate level of femininity according to her. Please tell me I am not the only one who cannot stand her. Her ideas about how women should behave and dress in order to be seen as 'feminine' make me want to throw up.

 

 

 

 

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Giddy
AmericanRose

I hope this doesn't spoil the video for anyone 😄

Of course #1 is about beautifying your outer self. 🙄

#2 is your environment. Is recycling or picking up litter mentioned? Nope. Just your bedroom (if living with parents) or house.

#3 Be a gentle listener. It started off okay - there are toxic people, don't listen to them, but friends and family that have your best interests at heart, listen to them. Okay, good.
And then of course, be sure to ask men questions so you build a framework about their life. I've never heard anyone 'flippantly' claim they have no idea what their husbands do at work, but anyway: you don't want him discussing those issues with another WOMAN at work! You know why.

#4's practicality is stressed repeatedly. And it is... ditch streaming services as part of your nightly routine, and replace it with building a skill/hobby/mind. Not bad advice, but... what does it have to do with femininity? Men also veg out with Netflix, and could use that time to learn a skill instead.

#5 Learn to regain your privacy. Part of being feminine is beautifying things, and part of being beautiful is having an air of mystery. This sounds like a lot of the 'men are mars women are venus' crap. She mentions not seeking public validation, which is good, but if someone wants to show off their body or express their thoughts on social media... how does that have anything to do with femininity? "Part of being feminine is remaining elegant and classy and private."

Don't we already have enough out there telling us how to be 'feminine'?

I looked at her Instagram and:

"I’m opening up on the blog today about my lifelong battle with Perfectionism 🖤 Read about my story on the blog!"

I don't think the blog is going to help her with that. Apparently she did a video/blog about how to spot a masculine man... sigh.

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Howl
Posted (edited)
7 hours ago, AmericanRose said:

I looked at her Instagram and:

"I’m opening up on the blog today about my lifelong battle with Perfectionism 🖤 Read about my story on the blog!"

Is it possible to die from witnessing peak irony?  Because if so, this irony perfected closes the circle and I'm ready to pass on to another life.  

Also, and I'm being a little BEC here, but did she botox her lips or just have a close encounter with bees stinging her repeatedly about the mouth area?

Edited by Howl

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AmazonGrace
Quote

#5 Learn to regain your privacy. Part of being feminine is beautifying things, and part of being beautiful is having an air of mystery. This sounds like a lot of the 'men are mars women are venus' crap. She mentions not seeking public validation, which is good, but if someone wants to show off their body or express their thoughts on social media... how does that have anything to do with femininity? "Part of being feminine is remaining elegant and classy and private."

Says a person who has a public Youtube channel.

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Howl
Posted (edited)

Also, I'm not about to take advice on living my life from a person who hasn't lived all that long (I'm 70).   She's in for some BIG surprises. 

20 hours ago, AmericanRose said:

She mentions not seeking public validation, which is good

But, but she's a perfectionist, and I can promise you she makes sure her hair, nails, makeup and clothes are PERFECT before she starts recording and why would she need to be perfect if not something related to being validated. 

Edited by Howl
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Giddy
AmericanRose
3 hours ago, Howl said:

Also, I'm not about to take advice on living my life from a person who hasn't lived all that long (I'm 70).   She's in for some BIG surprises. 

But, but she's a perfectionist, and I can promise you she makes sure her hair, nails, makeup and clothes are PERFECT before she starts recording and why would she need to be perfect if not something related to being validated. 

I have a feeling she's more of a 'do as I say, not as I do' person ;)

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Dreadcrumbs

"Femininity" is overrated.

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luv2laugh
Posted (edited)

She’s disgusting. We don’t need to learn how to be feminine. Society needs to treat gender as equal. We should focus our efforts on equality rather than differentiating ourselves. 

Want to wear make up, bake cookies, garden, “pinterestify” your home? Great. I like doing this too and so do my friends. Although, I personally don’t make it my identity like the girl above, it’s just a few simple hobbies of mine.

However, the 50s through, I’d say, the 90s focused on domestic activities and feminine beauty. Even today, magazines are telling teenagers how to make themselves more beautiful and how to get a “beach body”.

There is nothing wrong with being a feminine, domestic goddess. However, going forward, I hope more people spend their time and efforts on equality. We want ourselves, our sisters, our daughters, etc. to be treated as equals in the workplace.

The more we promote domestic femininity of the Lori Alexander type, the more men in the workplace continue to discriminate against us and judge women. It’s not fair but we are making progress.

Edited by luv2laugh
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Howl

Women's magazines typically have articles about: losing weight/getting rid of belly fat/having a better butt/beach body, pictures of the perfect attractive homes of attractive people, dealing with fatigue, issues with kids, dinner recipes, high calorie dessert recipes

If I'm in a waiting room and have a choice between say, SHAPE magazine and Men's Journal,  I'll almost always choose Men's Journal, because it's more oriented towards action and hard-core strength building.  The last Men's Journal I read while waiting for a hair cut had a fascinating article about Sumo wrestlers. 

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Wine time!
The Mother Dust

Someone should tell her the Botkins already cornered this market.  🤨Ugh, her whole channel is vomit. Did you guys see this title "how to be feminine in a feminist world" 

Spoiler

 

I watched 2 minutes of this and couldn't take the cringe anymore, so I clicked off.  

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dripcurl

She definitely seems to be bit a manic, it almost looks as if she is going to burst into tears at times. If someone feels the need to be perfect, but also a people pleaser, I would assume they will find avenues to do so that are they think are appealing. This girl probably grew up in a very gendered and performative environment, so taking the perfect housewife routine to the next level would make sense as a way for her to achieve “perfection”. For others it could be art, academia, the work place, or relationships.

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Timetraveler

This particular video frustrates me so much. The way she speaks about women having a job, that you only do it for the money/out of necessity, that most women don't really have a career or job that matters, etc. etc. I work as a high school teacher and Rufus knows we are not getting paid enough, but I love my job and I definitely see teaching as part of my identity.

Sorry but there is just something snobbish about her that I really, really dislike.

 

 

 

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Petronella
On 6/17/2019 at 5:52 AM, The Mother Dust said:

Someone should tell her the Botkins already cornered this market.  🤨Ugh, her whole channel is vomit. Did you guys see this title "how to be feminine in a feminist world" 

  Hide contents

 

I watched 2 minutes of this and couldn't take the cringe anymore, so I clicked off.  

Wow. I couldn’t get even two minutes in. But to recap the less-than-a-minute I watched: she says she’s a housewife as if it’s a naughty little secret, then it goes into what appear to be her title credits, which is happy music and quick cuts of her admiring herself in her computer camera from different angles. I couldn’t go any farther.

On 6/15/2019 at 6:42 PM, AmericanRose said:

I hope this doesn't spoil the video for anyone 😄

Of course #1 is about beautifying your outer self. 🙄

#2 is your environment. Is recycling or picking up litter mentioned? Nope. Just your bedroom (if living with parents) or house.

#3 Be a gentle listener. It started off okay - there are toxic people, don't listen to them, but friends and family that have your best interests at heart, listen to them. Okay, good.
And then of course, be sure to ask men questions so you build a framework about their life. I've never heard anyone 'flippantly' claim they have no idea what their husbands do at work, but anyway: you don't want him discussing those issues with another WOMAN at work! You know why.

#4's practicality is stressed repeatedly. And it is... ditch streaming services as part of your nightly routine, and replace it with building a skill/hobby/mind. Not bad advice, but... what does it have to do with femininity? Men also veg out with Netflix, and could use that time to learn a skill instead.

#5 Learn to regain your privacy. Part of being feminine is beautifying things, and part of being beautiful is having an air of mystery. This sounds like a lot of the 'men are mars women are venus' crap. She mentions not seeking public validation, which is good, but if someone wants to show off their body or express their thoughts on social media... how does that have anything to do with femininity? "Part of being feminine is remaining elegant and classy and private."

Don't we already have enough out there telling us how to be 'feminine'?

I looked at her Instagram and:

"I’m opening up on the blog today about my lifelong battle with Perfectionism 🖤 Read about my story on the blog!"

I don't think the blog is going to help her with that. Apparently she did a video/blog about how to spot a masculine man... sigh.

What’s so weird is that there wasn’t much actual advice. She seems to think it’s sufficient to say, “Be beautiful! Make your home beautiful!” with little clarity as to what that specifically means and how it might be achieved. What good is this video supposed to do anyone?

One thing that stood out to me is that she distinguished between “messy” and “dirty” (a good and helpful distinction!) but then said you should deal with the dirty first. Now, I’ve been doing some heavy-duty decluttering this week, and let me just say: the messy is ON TOP. In most cases you can’t clean the dirty first. You have to clear the messy to get access to the dirty. I get that, priority-wise, “dirty” is more urgent. But she speaks as if the biggest mess she’s ever dealt with is a boiled over pot of water and a magazine out of place on the coffee table.

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Marmion

She sort reminds me of this one Red Ice TV  personality I found , when I fell through the rabbit hole of YouTube . Except that Stell Bell seems to me to be an alt-right identarian , which I am not sure if Mrs . Midwest is or not .  A case in point , for any interested parties .   

 

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Soulhuntress

Bless her heart.  She is so very very sheltered, privileged and monetizing her lifestyle.  Influencers bug me so very very much.  Not just as a feminist but as a human living a human life. Where bad complicated shit happens to all of us.  I hope she is not in the beginning of fertility issues.  Really do.  😥

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ViolaSebastian

Oh, this woman...so here's what I know you all want to know...ten ways to bless ya' man. You will all be pleased to learn that there's a lot of negativity towards marriage and ESPECIALLY having a husband. So it's our job to really celebrate those masculine men in our lives and just bless the fuck out of their difficult, difficult lives. 

1. Cook. SMDH. I'm not kidding number one is cooking. It allows you to serve someone and it's a blessing to eat together. 

2. Listening. That's actually a nice tip that I'm not really going to snark on. Try to remember the names of his co-workers and listening about the project he's working on. Don't interrupt.

3. Saying "thank you" often. So many men are so gracious and generous, but they want to know that you appreciate it. Sometimes people don't want to say "thank you" because it feels like they owe something to somebody. The menz are working and providing and the key to joy is gratitude. Notice the little things and say "thank you" as much as possible.

4. Compliment him in front of other people. Men love to be shown respect and honor in front of their peers. He'll KNOW you respect him and you're excited to be there and excited and happy to be his wife. She then goes off on a tangent about not speaking badly about your husband in front of other people.

5. Anticipate his needs. Bring him a cold glass of water, cook his favorite meal, and bring him a warm towel after his shower (WAT.) Anticipating someone needs shown someone you're paying special attention to them and nurturing the relationship. She likes to start the coffee maker before her husband gets out of bed. And it's great because SHE LIKES COFFEE TOO Y'ALL. If you pride yourself on being Christ-like and generous, start with your husband. I missed the part in the Bible where Christ brings us all warm towels after we shower. :(

6. ASK him things, rather than TELL him things. 

7. Encourage his hobbies. Fit his hobbies into the budget and calendar, and your own life. You don't have to love his hobbies, but you gotta show up at his events and show your support for the shit he's interested in.

8. Show generous affection. Learn about your husband's Love Language. Put your hand on his shoulder and hold hands. Be generous with your physical self. Have a "vibrant" sex life. 

9. Look nice. SMDH. Can we go back to cooking? Put in a little more effort than "a greasy bun and sweatpants." Dress up just a little bit and look your best. Men are visual creatures. Cultivate your beauty and have "general self-discipline in the area of health" which sounds like "stay thin," to me. 

10. Take care of your mental health. It can be easy to get emotional, upset, fearful, etc. and a lot of us dump this on our husbands. Our husbands aren't our therapists. Focus on growing and being more stable, because whatever you're going through is going to affect your husband. Try to get better and more stable--because it takes the weight off your husband to know his wife is stable. 

God, her stuff was pretty basic and boring until that last bit. What a piece of crap thing to say. I'm glad she's encouraging women to get mental health help, including going to therapy, but holy shitballs, that's something to do for yourself, not for your husband. Yes, it's incredibly difficult to have a partner going through a mental health crisis, but seeking mental health help has to be something someone does for their own well-being, full-stop, or it's not going to work. 

 

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Happy
fluffy

I stumbled across her Instagram account a few weeks back and was aghast. She is a raging narcissist. It's remarkable how in love she is with her appearance. Also, total bitch territory here, but if someone is going to harp on being a domestic goddess then I expect her home decor, etc. to be impressive. Nothing at all is wrong with her place, but it's pretty dang basic. Not exactly what I would call pretty. 

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ViolaSebastian

More because I love to hate on this chick--here's homemake with me.

1. She says that everything in her living room is thrifted, because they cannot afford to go to Target. 

2. She pads this one really heavily with footage of her dog, which is irritating.

3. She's worried about people judging her use of chemicals to clean her windows and counter tops. She laments she's only been doing this for two years and that she has a lot to learn. (Hilariously, she does show herself cleaning the counter tops and she uses the same all-purpose kitchen cleaner I do). 

4. She ALMOST wore her crocs to Wal-mart, but she didn't. Because lord knows, everyone judges people who wear crocs to Wal-mart. 

5. She makes butter. She puts a dish towel over her bowl so that the heavy whipping cream doesn't get everywhere--instead of just using a bigger bowl. 

Honestly, that's little stuff, though. She comes across as much more likable in this sort of video than in her "Kiss Men's Asses" videos. 

 

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Marmion
Posted (edited)

I found out that she has a blog , and on it that her name is Caitlin Huber .  Also , I believe that this is her LinkedIn

Edited by Marmion

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FloraKitty35

I got thru 30 seconds of the video.  On a side note, Mid West, shame that Kanye & Kim didn't use that name for one of their kids. 

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Meh
smittykins

Well, they might have another one, you never know...

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Howl

It just occurred to me that there is nothing at this woman's center but emptiness.  She knows shes attractive in a conventionally feminine way, so she focuses on that, and keeping a perfect but bland house, because there's zip for imagination. 

She doesn't know who she truly is...so she focuses on her husband, his interests, his day, his body.  

Sad, really.  I wonder if her husband is the same. 

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luv2laugh

It looks like she went to Calvin College and before marrying, she was Caitlin Wikkerink.

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JermajestyDuggar
4 hours ago, Howl said:

It just occurred to me that there is nothing at this woman's center but emptiness.  She knows shes attractive in a conventionally feminine way, so she focuses on that, and keeping a perfect but bland house, because there's zip for imagination. 

She doesn't know who she truly is...so she focuses on her husband, his interests, his day, his body.  

Sad, really.  I wonder if her husband is the same. 

I know someone kind of like this. I think she’s finally started to find who she is now that she’s in her 30s. But it’s taken so long. I feel sorry for her but I also get incredibly annoyed by her shallowness and focus on looks. 

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ViolaSebastian

I watched her Q&A (God, I so need work to pick back up again, like ASAP). It was mostly a bunch of nothing, but I found out that her husband is a cop who primarily works the night shift. She was born in the US and grew up in Canada. Her dog looks like a boy, but is, in fact, a girl. She uses ELF eyeliner and does not have a schedule for doing things.

...seriously, that's it. She's that shallow.

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