Dillards 77: Sex Advice from Smoochie Sweetie Sweet Muffin

[Georgiana]

Jill "Smoochie darling sweetie sweet muffin baby doll with cinnamon on top" Dillard is giving unhealthy marriage advice straight from 1950!  Because the Dillard marriage appears to be such a paragon of marital bliss from the outside that we all want in on that.  Some really insightful nuggets include bullet points like "Your husband is not your dad", "Always do a Stepford greeting at the door when he gets home", and "Have lots of sex, possibly even more than either of you want".  Hope your husband has a high libido, or you're gonna feel like a failure!

Continued from:

 

[HarryPotterFan]

Came here to say when I saw the thread was hot I expected to see either a baby announcement or Derick saying something dumb but am now disgusted and want to vomit until my dying day. And I have only read a couple screenshots, not the entire thing.

Whats this about a child cheering section? Having your children cheer when you and your husband kiss? I’m an adult and I still sometimes make faces of disgust when my parents kiss. I’m mature, right?  

 

[luv2laugh]

How much do you all want to bet Lori Alexander is going to pile-on with this “clickbaity” TMI advice?

Edited June 3, 2019 by luv2laugh

[frugalitymom]

I’m curious if Derick’s brother’s wife buys into this bs.  If she doesn’t I can imagine her reading this saying wtf. Lord I hope they don’t compare notes, I might be ill now. 

Edited June 3, 2019 by frugalitymom

[HarryPotterFan]

How is sharing how many times you boink each week modest?

[Shiny]

I just do not get the advice people give on how often to have sex. I see it other places too, not just fundies. It doesn't allow for a lull or change in situation without making it seem like a "problem". There are times when my husband and I have sex way more than 3 times a week, and times when it's less. We had family visit for a full month this winter and we barely touched each other. There needs to be evolution in a relationship and these blanket statements do more harm than good. 

[bella8050]

Great title!

Jill loves getting it on too y'all. Which she should of course. I still wish she was showering, wearing nice clothes, and putting on scented lotion because it made HER happy, with Derick's enjoyment of those things being a bonus and not the goal.

Spoiler

 

[lizzybee]

Maybe I’m just old but 3-4 times a week is a lot and stops being fun for us. We’ve gone hard (heh heh) like this trying to make babies and we’ve both agreed it’s not our fave. If he asks I usually say yes because we are more like once a weekers and I’m for a least once a week. I guess that makes me always “joyfully available.”

Funny/weird/gross story time. In my full fundy toe dip, I had a friend from church whose husband wanted it just constantly. Like every day at least and she was so stressed and overwhelmed by it the pastor got involved and had to have a chat with her husband to cool it with the sweet fellowship requests. I know this because she told me pastor had had to speak to her husband. That was definitely the wildest to me. It makes me snicker a bit to this day imagining how that conversation went down and trying to guess who was the most uncomfortable. Fundamentalism makes everything so weird.

[nst]

does she mention anywhere about the 3-4 times a week when she was pregnant ? 

[lizzybee]

1 minute ago, bella8050 said:

Great title!

Jill loves getting it on too y'all. Which she should of course. I still wish she was showering, wearing nice clothes, and putting on scented lotion because it made HER happy, with Derick's enjoyment of those things being a bonus and not the goal.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Oh fantastic information. Jill “I love sex” Dillard. What did we do to be gifted all this TMI on a boring old Monday? 

[HereticHick]

11 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Whats this about a child cheering section? Having your children cheer when you and your husband kiss? I’m an adult and I still sometimes make faces of disgust when my parents kiss. I’m mature, right?  

 

I assume the kids are supposed to chant "1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi..." to make sure you make it to the full 6 seconds

[HarryPotterFan]

3 minutes ago, lizzybee said:

Oh fantastic information. Jill “I love sex” Dillard. What did we do to be gifted all this TMI on a boring old Monday? 

Maybe we all sinned or something and this is our punishment? 

[nst]

1 minute ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Maybe we all sinned or something and this is our punishment? 

well i got my fingerprints taken today for a part time job today - so there is that...

[zcccrv]

1 minute ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Maybe we all sinned or something and this is our punishment? 

Someone clearly had sex outside of marriage on a Sunday and the punishment unfortunately fell on us all.

[luv2laugh]

10 minutes ago, bella8050 said:

Jill loves getting it on too y'all. 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

VOM. Make it stop!

Edited June 3, 2019 by luv2laugh

[HermioneSparrow]

I thought she was preggo, now I wish I never opened this thread. Ewww

[VelociRapture]

That advice just makes me sad for Jill. I’m glad she seems to enjoy sex and some of the advice wasn’t bad - like the bit about seeking help for your sex life if you feel you need it - but a lot of it is just sad, weird, and unhealthy. 

On the other hand, the Dills once again prove invaluable for reminding people who the Duggars really are... because you know they aren’t the only ones who believe this stuff. This is what Jinger and Jessa and Joy and Josh and Joe and Si and all the other Duggar kids were raised to believe. I wouldn’t be surprised if most of them still believe this stuff and aim to live out these beliefs in their own marriages, but are simply smart enough not to discuss on social media.

[ViolaSebastian]

@JermajestyDuggar, I don't know any research on hugs, but if they make you and your partner happy, that's all that matters. You do you!

[Eponine]

18 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Whats this about a child cheering section? Having your children cheer when you and your husband kiss?

 

This is such a great amalgamation of her advice I'm loving it   My brothers and I probably could have come up with some amazing snarky cheers for our parents.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Lost my quote from last thread but @Georgiana said the greeting dad thing was very fundy.

how very Flowers in the Attic of them.  “Come greet me with kisses if you love me!”

yuck. 

Granted I have kidults not wee ones, but am I the only one who would find that greeting thibg too much pressure?

i walk in from a long day and commute sure I’ll exchange a pleasant hello with whomever is out and about but a big old binding exchange when all I want to do is change, use the washroom, and get something to drink would be asking a lot.

[HarryPotterFan]

2 minutes ago, Eponine said:

This is such a great amalgamation of her advice I'm loving it   My brothers and I probably could have come up with some amazing snarky cheers for our parents.

I’m imagining Izzy and Sam being forced to wave Pompoms with Derick’s school colors. 

“1 2 3, Kiss if you love dad-deee! 4 5 6, Mama’s got some tricks! 7 8, it is time to procreate!” 

I think I hate myself  

[luv2laugh]

You know what I really didn’t need to see?

Cathy chiming in, in the comments...

Spoiler

How sad... “It was not easy”...She has pressure to be “joyfully available” from Michelle, Cathy, and Derick!

#goals!

Edited June 3, 2019 by luv2laugh

[Screamapillar]

Jill Dillard: Dr. Ruth for the fundie set. Who would've thought?

[Kelsey]

14 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

I’m imagining Izzy and Sam being forced to wave Pompoms with Derick’s school colors. 

“1 2 3, Kiss if you love dad-deee! 4 5 6, Mama’s got some tricks! 7 8, it is time to procreate!” 

I think I hate myself  

9,10 now do it again!

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

I don't really have a problem with Jill talking about sex online. Honestly for the humpers who follow her they NEED to hear that sex is good and not dirty and sinful and something that should never be talked about. I like that she said to tell your husband if he hurts you, that is VERY important, because hurting your spouse is never OK. 

Honestly if anyone other than Jill, anyone outside the Fundy set, had posted this it would be taken with a grain of salt and maybe even thought to be somewhat good advice.  Take out the God stuff, the praying and fasting, and there is some solid advice in there. 

All this said, I don't think instagram is the place to promote this, a simple, check out our blog for an informative discussion on martial issues would have been better.