Bontragers and Bowers 4: Dumbass Love for the Romantic Lost Cause

[JermajestyDuggar]

Allison is still dating her brothers. Lincoln Taylor has pretty eyes. And lots of bible bee money. He won’t have a difficult time finding a “godly little wife.” Unless Allison gets jealous and sabotages it. 

Edited September 24, 2019 by JermajestyDuggar

[VVV]

If my daughter ever posted anything like that about "dating" her brothers, I'd be lining up a therapist for her posthaste. And asking myself where we went wrong.

Edited September 25, 2019 by VVV

[scoutsadie]

On 9/11/2019 at 8:48 PM, Jigsaw3 said:

I'd be finishing that trim stat for that reason alone.

Let's pretend they haven't finished it yet because they know it annoys Stevehovah and they like to giggle about it behind his back every time he's over at their house. That's fun!

4 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Allison is still dating her brothers. Lincoln Taylor has pretty eyes. And lots of bible bee money. He won’t have a difficult time finding a “godly little wife.” Unless Allison gets jealous and sabotages it. 

WTF "never deserve this gift"?!? I find that fucked up on several levels.

[Lgirlrocks]

26 minutes ago, scoutsadie said:

Let's pretend they haven't finished it yet because they know it annoys Stevehovah and they like to giggle about it behind his back every time he's over at their house. That's fun!

WTF "never deserve this gift"?!? I find that fucked up on several levels.

Didn’t you know that boys are male and all males are better than females. Females don’t deserve males. We fucked everything up! 

I agree that it is fucked up. One of the things that bugs me about fundies, and Christians in general, is that we don’t deserve things. 

[Syriana]

 

 

 

1

6 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

I agree that it is fucked up. One of the things that bugs me about fundies, and Christians in general, is that we don’t deserve things. 

Not having an entitled attitude is certainly part of Christian teachings irrespective of denomination, but it goes horribly wrong when it leads to permanent self-flagellation (metaphorical or literal!) and the donning of the proverbial hair shirt!  Finding the right balance is one area where a really good priest/vicar/pastor is invaluable; when a lack of entitlement devolves into perma-wailing about not deserving x, y or z, then you're not accepting the gifts you've been given with good grace - you're also probably failing to fully appreciate them or make the most of them.  How can anyone fully appreciate what they have if they've turned weeping and wailing into an art form?  

How many parents would be pleased if they gave their child a gift, only to hear a constant litany of how they didn't deserve it in response?  Not many I would think!  So, if we take the teaching of God as a spiritual father, I wonder how happy 'He' is with the constant whining!

[anjulibai]

No where she'd rather be, my ass. If she had a guy courting her, she'd spend no time with her brothers. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

12 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

No where she'd rather be, my ass. If she had a guy courting her, she'd spend no time with her brothers. 

The fact that she’s been so upbeat lately makes me think she is seeing someone. Maybe he’s long distance so she doesn’t get to see him often and her brothers are good at filling in for him. 

[PlentyOfJesusFishInTheSea]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

The fact that she’s been so upbeat lately makes me think she is seeing someone. Maybe he’s long distance so she doesn’t get to see him often and her brothers are good at filling in for him. 

I know that's not what you meant, but ew.

[usedbicycle]

How in the world did Taylor "shape her view of manhood"?? He's not even a man and he's 8 years younger than Allison... she used to change his diapers for God's sake. My youngest brother is 5 years younger than me and I saw him as a baby until he turned 30. 

[ophelia]

My brother is 27 and I'm 31 and for a loooong time I viewed him as the baby brother he always was. In the last few years that changed and he grew into a really lovely young man: he cares a lot about me and the rest of our family, he has ditched a lot of the toxic masculinity stuff our society (and in parts our mother) taught him and he had the backbone to start a therapy to work through the stuff that was putting him down. He really showed up for himself and has earned my biggest respect by doing so. So yeah, he somehow shaped my view of manhood. 

And still he can be annoying as fuck and gets my blood boil from time to time, but that is what younger siblings are supposed to do, isn't it?

[WarriorJane]

On 9/25/2019 at 5:42 AM, Syriana said:

Not having an entitled attitude is certainly part of Christian teachings irrespective of denomination, but it goes horribly wrong when it leads to permanent self-flagellation (metaphorical or literal!) and the donning of the proverbial hair shirt!  Finding the right balance is one area where a really good priest/vicar/pastor is invaluable; when a lack of entitlement devolves into perma-wailing about not deserving x, y or z, then you're not accepting the gifts you've been given with good grace - you're also probably failing to fully appreciate them or make the most of them.  How can anyone fully appreciate what they have if they've turned weeping and wailing into an art form?  

How many parents would be pleased if they gave their child a gift, only to hear a constant litany of how they didn't deserve it in response?  Not many I would think!  So, if we take the teaching of God as a spiritual father, I wonder how happy 'He' is with the constant whining!

While simultaneously embracing the prosperity gospel.  It's baffling. 

[anachronistic]

In all honesty, I’m confused, because by regular definitions of the word dating, wouldn’t dating your siblings be considered incest? And why is dating other, non related people so terrible that they have to ‘court’ instead but it’s okay to date your brother?

If Alison ever escapes fundie-dom and gets serious therapy (we can only hope) she will spend many, many sessions over this. Poor brainwashed woman.

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 minutes ago, anachronistic said:

In all honesty, I’m confused, because by regular definitions of the word dating, wouldn’t dating your siblings be considered incest? And why is dating other, non related people so terrible that they have to ‘court’ instead but it’s okay to date your brother?

If Alison ever escapes fundie-dom and gets serious therapy (we can only hope) she will spend many, many sessions over this. Poor brainwashed woman.

What’s crazy is that the Bons don’t seem to use the word “courtship.” Chelsy always said she and John were in a relationship and he was her boyfriend before they got engaged. So even though they seem to “date with a purpose,” they don’t court.

[anachronistic]

Oh! That is interesting. I don’t quite remember which families court, which allow boyfriends, etc. Weird indeed.

[Lgirlrocks]

9 minutes ago, anachronistic said:

Oh! That is interesting. I don’t quite remember which families court, which allow boyfriends, etc. Weird indeed.

Bates have boyfriend/girlfriend, then they court, and if the courtship is successful they get engaged then marry. Very weird. 

[nelliebelle1197]

12 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

Bates have boyfriend/girlfriend, then they court, and if the courtship is successful they get engaged then marry. Very weird. 

That is TV Bates. Real Bates did the courting nonsense at least through the first few girls. I think the younger girls are harder to control and TV needs them to be less weird.

Edited September 27, 2019 by nelliebelle1197

[scoutsadie]

12 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

Bates have boyfriend/girlfriend, then they court, and if the courtship is successful they get engaged then marry. Very weird. 

You forgot "special friend" at the beginning. *gag*

[JermajestyDuggar]

Just imagine if the Bateses tried to do what the Bontragers do. Only announcing a relationship once they are engaged. It would be impossible. They just announced Chaney and Trace changing their relationship status from “single” to “in a relationship.” Because that’s newsworthy. 

[snarkopolis]

On 9/10/2019 at 2:19 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Here’s an example. They took down the trim to paint and put down flooring but never put it back up. They also never painted the gray behind the counters because they were probably planning on putting up a backsplash. They should probably just paint the backsplash area gray and say heck with the tile since it’s not necessary. 

That's a lot of salad.

[JermajestyDuggar]

30 minutes ago, snarkopolis said:

That's a lot of salad.

The Bontragers are one of the healthier fundie families. They eat a lot of vegetables and they try to get plenty of exercise. 

[ophelia]

And their food looks delicious! They probably look down on the MaxHells crap salad and all the other nasty stuff that was posted on their blog over the years.

[JermajestyDuggar]

This sure makes her sound like she’s in a serious relationship. I’ve seen other fundie girls with blogs do this. After they get a serious boyfriend, they become the know it all of relationships. 

[Lgirlrocks]

On 9/28/2019 at 12:43 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

This sure makes her sound like she’s in a serious relationship. I’ve seen other fundie girls with blogs do this. After they get a serious boyfriend, they become the know it all of relationships. 

lets hope it’s someone other than her brother! Yuck! The only time I double dated with my brother was when him and his girl friend went out to eat with my boy friend and me. So sad that they can only date siblings and parents until marriage. 

[LurkerOverThePond]

"Does he cherish you enough to fight for your purity and character?"

WTF does that mean?? How does someone fight for your purity? By burning porn magazines at a kiosk? By throwing tv out of window when a tiny bit of naked skin is shown? 

[Melissa1977]

26 minutes ago, LurkerOverThePond said:

"Does he cherish you enough to fight for your purity and character?"

WTF does that mean?? How does someone fight for your purity? By burning porn magazines at a kiosk? By throwing tv out of window when a tiny bit of naked skin is shown? 

Scolding her girlfriend for showing her knees, probably.