John David & Abbie 8: Schrodinger No More, Baby Passenger Onboard

[Smee]

Had an eating disorder related to under-eating/fasting* before conceiving my 3rd child, and was heading that way when I conceived my 2nd (but it was early enough that I thought “have to eat properly for the baby now” and that was enough, whereas the last pregnancy that didn’t work so well). They’re both girls, but I’m a pretty tiny sample! My first, non-ED-conceived child was a boy and my husband is one of 3 boys.

*I specify because binge eating disorder leading to weight GAIN is definitely a real thing too, plus some patients with bulimia don’t lose weight, and it irks me when people talking about EDs in general terms are actually only thinking about those of an extreme weight loss type.

 

I thought the research regarding pilots, submariners and air traffic controllers was suspected to be related to radar?

In my primary school class we had 2 boys to every girl. In my older brother’s year it was the other way around.

I do think it only looks like a “streak” because all these girls share ONE set of grandparents. I don’t follow the other families enough to know, but for example the Duggar baby could be the one girl born in the middle of a boy boom for Abbie’s or Lauren’s parents. None of the 2nd gen have more than 2 kids of a given sex in a row yet.

[backyard sylph]

On 8/19/2019 at 10:28 PM, zee_four said:

I would say tell the docs you had problems with addiction, they'll definitely avoid giving you opiates and opiods of any form. the problem is 9/10 nurses, doctors and other health care professionals will treat you like garbage in my experience and instead of working on alternative pain management they let you suffer. I have some pretty horrific stories....

I wouldn't feel comfortable lying about having addiction problems, but I understand there's a medication for people who are anesthesia-averse that you're given ahead of time. And I am given penicillin alternatives when that's needed, which have worked all right.

[twoandthrough]

On 8/21/2019 at 2:01 PM, SorenaJ said:

@Someone Out There @theotherelise I think it's only true for fighter pilots, not regular pilots. But there have been studies showing that fighter pilots have daughters more often than sons.

I think it has to do with the G-forces. I wonder if the same effect could be achieved by extreme roller coasters. If you send your male SO out roller-coastering all day, are you more likely to conceive a girl?

Fighter pilot wife here, and we have two daughters - can confirm that most do have girls, but a few boys have snuck in! 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

3 hours ago, twoandthrough said:

Fighter pilot wife here, and we have two daughters - can confirm that most do have girls, but a few boys have snuck in! 

More anecdata.  I’m married to a AF retired pilot...he also flew a plane with a radar.  We have two girls and most of our aircrew friends’ kids are girls. 

[viii]

The more you know! One of the characters in my novel is married to a pilot and they have twin boys. Maybe I should change that to twin girls, lol. 

[raspberrymint]

Huh.  I'm thinking about training to be a commercial pilot next year.  (I'm pregnant now.)

No statistics on commercial pilots?  Does the gender of the pilot change anything?  

Another thought is I wonder if Jana is jealous.  Yes, she's been through this before with all her (younger!) adult sisters, but JD is her twin.  Maybe she's jealous in a new way.  I'm her age and I know I would be messed up.

Edited August 25, 2019 by raspberrymint
Another thought

[twoandthrough]

5 hours ago, raspberrymint said:

Huh.  I'm thinking about training to be a commercial pilot next year.  (I'm pregnant now.)

No statistics on commercial pilots?  Does the gender of the pilot change anything?  

Another thought is I wonder if Jana is jealous.  Yes, she's been through this before with all her (younger!) adult sisters, but JD is her twin.  Maybe she's jealous in a new way.  I'm her age and I know I would be messed up.

They say it's because of all the radar and G's they're exposed to in the fighter jets, and I have only seen research on male pilots, as there are very few (in comparison) female fighter pilots... but they are growing in number (yay!), so I guess we'll see in time. I don't think commercial pilots face the same thing.

[just_ordinary]

13 hours ago, raspberrymint said:

Huh.  I'm thinking about training to be a commercial pilot next year.  (I'm pregnant now.)

No statistics on commercial pilots?  Does the gender of the pilot change anything?  

Another thought is I wonder if Jana is jealous.  Yes, she's been through this before with all her (younger!) adult sisters, but JD is her twin.  Maybe she's jealous in a new way.  I'm her age and I know I would be messed up.

I think it would be even harder to find any real statistic proof apart from hints in the data. It’s easier with men as the sperm decides the sex of the baby. Any deeper mechanisms as stress/high blood pressure of the mother that could affect the implantation/survival of the egg/embryo are almost impossible to clearly extract and impossible to pin to just one cause. And an unsuccessful implantation/early miscarriage can also happen for so many different reasons- you can never really say why if there isn’t a clearly diagnosed problem (like a blood clotting disorder or thyroid problems for example).

There is also the question if it's truly the job or if also other factors play a part. Just because two things are seen together in data (high G forces - XX babies) doesn’t always mean there has to be a correlation. It could be a coincidence, especially because there aren’t that many fighter pilots and astronauts. I believe the data is strong enough to suggest a correlation but I don’t see any big study in the future where they test sperm of those men over a long time to confirm the mechanism.

Edited August 26, 2019 by just_ordinary

[LillyP]

Just chiming in to say that one my college friends is married to a fighter pilot....they have two boys.

My brother is a pilot, although just an airline/corporate pilot, but since he and his wife have no plans to have kids I guess we'll never test the theory on that...haha.

 

[SeekingAdventure]

I work for an airline and i have not noticed a pattern in our pilots kids genders. As far as i can tell, it's devided fairly even. 

I've noticed loads of colleagues (also in the cabin, but g forces would be the same, we also have the radar and everything else) having twins, and found that quite interesting. I assume it to be a coincide though. But maybe there are studies out there..? 

[twoandthrough]

11 hours ago, SeekingAdventure said:

I work for an airline and i have not noticed a pattern in our pilots kids genders. As far as i can tell, it's devided fairly even. 

I've noticed loads of colleagues (also in the cabin, but g forces would be the same, we also have the radar and everything else) having twins, and found that quite interesting. I assume it to be a coincide though. But maybe there are studies out there..? 

Airliners don't pull nearly the same amount of G's as fighter jets, so that may have something to do with it... or it's all just coincidental either way ? I know one fighter pilot is currently putting together a big study to see if it's all true or not, at least within the Air Force fighter pilot world. (I don't know details about the study yet, just that it is being done). 

[nvmbr02]

My husband and I were both air traffic controllers in the Air Force. In our experience, there were more girls born on base in general. It wasn't a 90/10 split or anything, but maybe closer to 65/35. It did seem to matter which base you were at and some units (Ammo seemed to be one that had most/all girls) had a long track record of only girls. In the pilots we know, the fighter pilots do seem to have more girls but commercial and military cargo pilots also seemed a lot more mixed. For us personally, our oldest is a girl, conceived while we both we active duty and working in a tower. Our son was next, he was conceived while Dh was still active duty but I had separated from the military, Then Dh moved over to the civilian side of the house and we then conceived another boy and then our youngest daughter. So for us, things were fairly even. We do know plenty of all boy or mostly boy AF families so there certainly is still a good mix of boys and girls.

[Joyleaf]

This was a rather small study but I found it interesting back then:
Female gender pre-selection by maternal diet in combination with timing of sexual intercourse

As for my (relatively) close family:
I have two male and one female cousin (so we were two boys and two girls in total). We now have the following kids:
Cousin 1: girl, girl, girl,
Cousin 2: boy, girl,
Me: boy, boy,
Cousin 3: girl
- so 5 girls and 3 boys.

The only thing that could be interesting about this is that cousin 1's wife was a vegetarian while I was a ferocious meat-eater when we had our kids, and she had only girls and I had only boys.

[Melissa1977]

On 8/25/2019 at 9:01 PM, raspberrymint said:

Huh.  I'm thinking about training to be a commercial pilot next year.  (I'm pregnant now.)

No statistics on commercial pilots?  Does the gender of the pilot change anything?  

Another thought is I wonder if Jana is jealous.  Yes, she's been through this before with all her (younger!) adult sisters, but JD is her twin.  Maybe she's jealous in a new way.  I'm her age and I know I would be messed up.

I read that you cannot breastfeed the baby if you fly in a daily basis. They talked about plane staff. I don't remember the details but maybe you would like to check it.

[Someone Out There]

1 hour ago, Melissa1977 said:

I read that you cannot breastfeed the baby if you fly in a daily basis. They talked about plane staff. I don't remember the details but maybe you would like to check it.

It potentially has to do with radiation levels. My understanding is that air crew have radiation badges or some such and if they reach a certain level they can't fly for the rest of the month.  Potentially the level considered safe for an adult isn't considered safe for a baby via breast milk.

[Iamtheway]

I read the title of this thread as ”baby passenger no more” all the time and think they have lost the baby. 

Horrible belives aside I don’t wish that kind of hurt on anyone. 

[JDuggs]

4 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

I read the title of this thread as ”baby passenger no more” all the time and think they have lost the baby. 

Same here! I blow through that comma every time.

[neurogirl]

It is a slight effect, but yes, famine can skew gender selection in favor of baby girls born. There was a study done during the "Great Leap Forward" in China in the 1960s that resulted in famine, and the pre-famine ratio of 108 boys: 100 girls (which is not totally weird, worldwide there is a 105/6: 100 boy to girl ratio and this has been noted for centuries) became 104 boys: 100 girls. A slight mathematical difference, but resulted in millions of fewer boy babies than expected. Scientists don't know if this is due to selective fertilization, or fewer live births of male embryos.

https://www.livescience.com/19311-famine-male-births-sex-ratio.html

[GuineaPigCourtship]

Speaking about medical professionals ignoring women's pain or stresses, I am currently miscarrying our first, much desired pregnancy.  When I went to the ER yesterday for bleeding the nurse sarcastically (and yes, my husband was there to confirm it wasn't just my hormones) asked me if I knew this was common and normal in pregnancy, right?  Right?  And was so annoyed by my wasting her time she wouldn't even take a complete history.  I got halfway through listing medications I'm on (there are only 3 plus prenatal vitamins) before she said, "the doctor will be in shortly" and left.  She didn't come back in after the doctor told me we were losing the baby, which was probably for the best because I didn't need to be arrested for punching her in the face.

I'm a veterinarian (both ER and general practice) and if ANY of my nurses EVER spoke to a client that way we'd have a serious problem.  They never would, though, because I don't work with assholes.  This probably isn't the right place to vent but I don't want to share about this with people in real life any more than I absolutely must.

[LacyMay]

4 minutes ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

She didn't come back in after the doctor told me we were losing the baby, which was probably for the best because I didn't need to be arrested for punching her in the face.

I'm so sorry you had to go through that, I can't even imagine how much more difficult that made an already terrible situation. I'm sending all my good energy to you.

 

6 minutes ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

I'm a veterinarian (both ER and general practice) and if ANY of my nurses EVER spoke to a client that way we'd have a serious problem.  

A huge thank you for all that you and your staff (nurses, RVTs, assistants, receptionists etc do) we love our vet and I don't think you all year nearly enough how appreciated you are. Any scary situation we had as first time pet owners was made 1000x easier by how incredible our vet clinic was. 

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

@GuineaPigCourtship, I'm so sorry that a difficult time was made even worse by that insensitive nurse. I'm sending you a gentle hug, if you like hugs. You'll be on my mind today, and I'll be wishing comfort for you. 

[LillyP]

5 hours ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

Speaking about medical professionals ignoring women's pain or stresses, I am currently miscarrying our first, much desired pregnancy.  When I went to the ER yesterday for bleeding the nurse sarcastically (and yes, my husband was there to confirm it wasn't just my hormones) asked me if I knew this was common and normal in pregnancy, right?  Right?  And was so annoyed by my wasting her time she wouldn't even take a complete history.  I got halfway through listing medications I'm on (there are only 3 plus prenatal vitamins) before she said, "the doctor will be in shortly" and left.  She didn't come back in after the doctor told me we were losing the baby, which was probably for the best because I didn't need to be arrested for punching her in the face.

 I'm a veterinarian (both ER and general practice) and if ANY of my nurses EVER spoke to a client that way we'd have a serious problem.  They never would, though, because I don't work with assholes.  This probably isn't the right place to vent but I don't want to share about this with people in real life any more than I absolutely must.

So sorry you're going through that. My first pregnancy ended up being Ectopic (after already trying for a year) and I had the worst and most rude staff in the hospital ER. From the intake nurse, to the attending MD, to the ultrasound tech (who wasn't rude but was super cold/silent and wouldn't speak). When I finally saw the OB, who was also one of the OB's at our local practice, she was such a bitch to me I almost slapped her. I was listening to her give me my options and in the fog/crying I asked her a question when apparently she wasn't finished - she snapped right back at me and told me if I would let her finish I'd have my answer. 

I live in a fairly small town with one hospital and only one OB office with privileges at the hospital. My experience was so bad I switched practices and specifically drove 1.5 hrs each way to another doctor for all prenatal care AND to deliver at an out of town hospital. I don't know if it's just medical professionals all become jaded, but I haven't experienced such a lack of compassion than I did that night. 

[JordynDarby5]

@GuineaPigCourtship  I'm so sorry. And to have deal with that crappy nurse on top of it. Sending you hugs and prayers. 

[Melissa1977]

@GuineaPigCourtship I'm so sorry! Send you a big hug.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

22 hours ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

Speaking about medical professionals ignoring women's pain or stresses, I am currently miscarrying our first, much desired pregnancy.  When I went to the ER yesterday for bleeding the nurse sarcastically (and yes, my husband was there to confirm it wasn't just my hormones) asked me if I knew this was common and normal in pregnancy, right?  Right?  And was so annoyed by my wasting her time she wouldn't even take a complete history.  I got halfway through listing medications I'm on (there are only 3 plus prenatal vitamins) before she said, "the doctor will be in shortly" and left.  She didn't come back in after the doctor told me we were losing the baby, which was probably for the best because I didn't need to be arrested for punching her in the face.

I'm a veterinarian (both ER and general practice) and if ANY of my nurses EVER spoke to a client that way we'd have a serious problem.  They never would, though, because I don't work with assholes.  This probably isn't the right place to vent but I don't want to share about this with people in real life any more than I absolutely must.

Call the hospital and file a complaint against that nurse, she needs to be disciplined. Her bad day isn't your fault. If you remember her name call the hospital's main number and ask to speak with either the ER director or the director of nursing to file a complaint about a nurse. She needs to be dealt with before she ignores a life threatening patient complaint.  

I'm so sorry you had to deal with such a miserable woman while you are in such emotional and physical pain. And I'm so very sorry for your lost pregnancy.