M is for Mama 4: S is for Shaving Shiloh

[JermajestyDuggar]

15 minutes ago, SuperNova said:

How old is Abbie? I know we've discussed it before but I've forgotten.

I think she’s 36.

[DancingPhalanges]

1 hour ago, danvillebelle said:

Or a tween trying to impress someone.  RAD!  RAD!  

Don’t forget YO, yo. 

I’m about to get super petty, but she annoys me so here goes. 

Her post:

 

Spoiler

And then I found this, it gives me lyfe, yo. 

 

Spoiler

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Sometimes I will say things that are much younger than I normally would as a joke. But I don’t think Braggie is joking. 

[feministxtian]

4 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I think she’s 36.

She's the same age as my daughter. Yet, my daughter is more mature than Braggie by a long shot, has a wide circle of friends and interests and doesn't try to speak like a teenager (well, when she's talking to mom or her brothers it's a different story). She's an IT professional and knows how to wear that professional facade when she has to do so. She's also funny, sarcastic as hell (can't imagine where she got THAT from), and in general an incredible human being...which is much more than I can say for Braggie. 

[Seahorse Wrangler]

22 hours ago, Off the Rails said:

Without fail, she manages to work in her age 19 college graduation/teaching high school kids basically the same age as her. It's amazing how often she works that casual brag into posts. And now casually makes sure she mentions that she teaches high school Spanish at their co op. Frequently mentions it. Like, whenever she can find a way to drop it into a post or comment. 

She could tell the story or share her opinion without reminding us of her superior intellect. They add nothing to the point she's trying to make. I sincerely do wonder if she ever has a little time of introspection/self awareness and exams her motives for including that information in her posts. 

I seriously doubt señorita braggie is fluently bilingual.

 

My children have been  immersed in Québecois French from being 18 months old. They are still learning new words, new phrases as they move from the school room to college to the work environment to dealing with landlords and bills and all the adulting that they have to navigate as truly independent people.

[Walking Cat Bed]

19 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I think she’s 36.

She's a year OLDER than me???

[Shiny]

5 hours ago, Walking Cat Bed said:

She's a year OLDER than me???

She's 5 years older than me.  I have major second-hand embarrassment now. 

[SuperNova]

On 8/8/2019 at 2:17 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Sometimes I will say things that are much younger than I normally would as a joke. But I don’t think Braggie is joking. 

I don't think it's a joke. It doesn't necessarily bother me when an adult uses slang. I do it myself and I'm 40. In my defense, I was heavy into 80's/90's skate culture in SoCal, (Powell Peralta, Church of Skatin') and its practically ingrained in me. Words like totally and rad still sneak into conversation but it's not like I would be going to Mr. Nova's company dinner and talking that way. The majority of our friends would be considered unconventional or counter-culture and use slang in casual conversation.

In Abbie's case though, like most of her personality, it feels contrived and artificial. The kind of soccer mom trying to be cool bullshit that makes me roll my eyes. She wants to be the cool parent and it gives me mega second hand embarrassment. I don't think she knows who she is and that's why she comes across as such a phony.

Edited August 9, 2019 by SuperNova

[luv2laugh]

I think Braggie Abbie is insecure being a stay at home mom. She hates being around her kids. She acts like she is some sort of Mother Teresa for putting up with them. 

[Ozlsn]

4 hours ago, SuperNova said:

I don't think she knows who she is and that's why she comes across as such a phony.

I agree. She seems to have kind of missed the young adult stage where most of us figure it out. It doesn't seem like she's ever really had space to work out what she actually wanted to do - my guess would be interior design or similar - and pursue it. Of course if she went on birth control and sent the older kids to school she might have time to figure stuff out. Or spend more time on Instagram. 

[SuperNova]

10 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

I agree. She seems to have kind of missed the young adult stage where most of us figure it out. It doesn't seem like she's ever really had space to work out what she actually wanted to do - my guess would be interior design or similar - and pursue it. Of course if she went on birth control and sent the older kids to school she might have time to figure stuff out. Or spend more time on Instagram. 

Or something fashion related. Someone posted a link to her old blog awhile back. It focused on putting together nice outfits for pennies on the dollar by shopping at Goodwill, clothing swaps, etc. It still came across as braggy and there was a million pictures of Abby but at least it felt slightly more authentic. But back then she didn't have as many kids and wasn't trying to be the coolest mom ever.

[JermajestyDuggar]

31 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

I agree. She seems to have kind of missed the young adult stage where most of us figure it out. It doesn't seem like she's ever really had space to work out what she actually wanted to do - my guess would be interior design or similar - and pursue it. Of course if she went on birth control and sent the older kids to school she might have time to figure stuff out. Or spend more time on Instagram. 

She brags about graduating college at 19 but it seems obvious to me that was not good for her development. She was thrown into the adult world too early and she’s been trying to prove herself ever since.

[SuperNova]

Abbie is most definitely reading here. Yesterday I mentioned her old blog, today we get this:

"Hi, my name is Abbie, and I used to do (cheap!) fashion posts for my blog(s) all the time. I even had a thrifting blog called Secondhand or Bare Bottom. ? (You can Google it). Now, I only take pictures with my kids or in my bathroom mirror with the toilet in the background and have totally forgotten how to pose (if I ever knew). And I like it better that way. 
Now, it's your turn. Tell me something you used to do that's just not you anymore. 
P.S. This outfit was from date night after I got Shaun back from a work trip today. My husband back + cheat meal night = doubly sweet!!" 

[TuringMachine]

r/thathappened

[Snarkasarus Rex]

5 minutes ago, TuringMachine said:

r/thathappened

"Mama, let me feed your ego so you don't yell at or belittle me or my siblings".

This is Ezra totally placating Abbie as a survival tactic.  Abbie's a lot like my mother.  I personally wouldn't put up with her shit, but my younger sister absolutely did the exact same shit that Ezra is.  Not surprisingly, she's my mom's favorite. ?

Edited August 10, 2019 by Snarkasarus Rex

[purjolok84]

For many parents, if their children behaved as Ezra does on a long-term basis, there would be cause for concern. That level of passivity and eagerness to please in a child does not seem positive. I would be asking why my child doesn't want to play more, or behave more developmentally appropriately.* Having being brought up in such an environment, would Ezra be able to tell the difference between choosing to be helpful on his own and feeling pressured?

Meanwhile Abbie is taking advantage as much as possible. As per usual.

*This is not to say that children can't be mature for their age or take on harder tasks. In Ezra's case, I question whether he is naturally being helpful or displaying helpful behaviour beyond his years to keep his (and his siblings) life less stressful.

[Hane]

13 hours ago, purjolok84 said:

For many parents, if their children behaved as Ezra does on a long-term basis, there would be cause for concern. That level of passivity and eagerness to please in a child does not seem positive. I would be asking why my child doesn't want to play more, or behave more developmentally appropriately.* Having being brought up in such an environment, would Ezra be able to tell the difference between choosing to be helpful on his own and feeling pressured?

Meanwhile Abbie is taking advantage as much as possible. As per usual.

*This is not to say that children can't be mature for their age or take on harder tasks. In Ezra's case, I question whether he is naturally being helpful or displaying helpful behaviour beyond his years to keep his (and his siblings) life less stressful.

Oh, God—I finally realize it: I was Ezra. Yes, I helped out with my younger sisters more than is customary when my mother was ill (when I was 8, she spent the summer with her leg in a cast up to her hip; when I was 12, she had a hysterectomy), but I spent a lot of time tiptoeing around her feelings even when she was perfectly well.

[SuperNova]

50 minutes ago, Hane said:

Oh, God—I finally realize it: I was Ezra. Yes, I helped out with my younger sisters more than is customary when my mother was ill (when I was 8, she spent the summer with her leg in a cast up to her hip; when I was 12, she had a hysterectomy), but I spent a lot of time tiptoeing around her feelings even when she was perfectly well.

I'm sorry that happened to you. My mom did the same to my sister who was older than me by two years. I grew up thinking of her as a second mom. I was sick for the first 8 years of my life and my mom split the work between her and sis. My sister deeply resents me now and we haven't spoken in more than a decade. There's no telling how that type of early #thirdparent mentality will effect the children's adult relationships.

Edited August 11, 2019 by SuperNova

[JermajestyDuggar]

In my extended family, there was a third parent situation. When I went to visit as a elementary age kid, I noticed. The oldest was from the father’s first marriage. He was a widower. He and his second wife went on to have 4 more children and she adopted the stepdaughter. But it was obvious to anyone with eyesight that she was treated like a servant. She took care of her younger siblings like a third parent and helped with housework. When I would visit, I would help her out because I felt bad for her. They were a conservative Christian family and when she became pregnant at 19, she moved out. I know it was hard for her being a single teen mom but I’m glad she got away from them. She’s fine now. Her child is grown. She only has that one child. I figured she only wanted one child since she already spent so much time taking care of her siblings. 

Edited August 11, 2019 by JermajestyDuggar

[danvillebelle]

10 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

In my extended family, there was a third parent situation. When I went to visit as a elementary age kid, I noticed. The oldest was from the father’s first marriage. He was a widower. He and his second wife went on to have 4 more children and she adopted the stepdaughter. But it was obvious to anyone with eyesight that she was treated like a servant. She took care of her younger siblings like a third parent and helped with housework. When I would visit, I would help her out because I felt bad for her.

I was privy to a situation like this growing up, only it was a family friend of my dad's.  He had a daughter from his first marriage who was a year older than me.  They divorced, he remarried several years later and ended up having 3 kids total with his new wife.  First daughter had always lived with her mom...until she passed away from cancer when daughter was 13.  She went to live with dad and stepmom...who immediately corralled her into being full-time maid and nanny in their HUGE house.  

I haven't spoken to her since we were teens...but to the best of my knowledge she became so angry as a young adult about the time she'd lost and the amount of slave labor she did for them...that she cut off her dad completely and has never spoken to him since.  

[SassyPants]

Yet another bragging Abbie post today. 

[luv2laugh]

I think blogging and instagram makes Braggie an unhappy, bitter person. It’s like she has a chip on her shoulder and a need to prove. She should consider going cold turkey for awhile. Maybe she’d be nicer to her kids.

Edited August 13, 2019 by luv2laugh

[SassyPants]

8 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

I think blogging and instagram makes Braggie an unhappy, bitter person. It’s like she has a chip on her shoulder and a need to prove. She should consider going cold turkey for awhile. Maybe she’d be nicer to her kids.

Her approach and use of social media reminds me a lot of Jill Duggar. She presents as socially awkward and does not seem to understand that what and how she posts does not translate well or reflect well on her. Most of what she seemingly intends to convey is not what many readers derive from her posts. Personality wise she is nothing like Jill though- she needs to stop having kids. No matter how rad she claims those kids are, she does not have the personality to healthfully parent a houseful of happy kids. It’s a clear personality career/lifestyle mismatch.

[SuperNova]

17 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Yet another bragging Abbie post today. 

Which one? The one where she's bragging about her kids homeschooling? Or the one where she suddenly has an amazing green thumb because she kept an ivy alive? I don't know much about homeschooling but I do know that ivy is one of the easiest indoor plants to care for. Abbie, brag to me when you can keep a pot of lithops alive. Then I'll be impressed.

Edited August 13, 2019 by SuperNova

[SassyPants]

I want to clarify something because I think AH reads here. The reason I call her out So readily is because I can see right through her BS. I share a couple of her main traits, the whole body image focus and the lack of patience. I also have a similar background in that I graduated from HS early and young, and went straight to 4 year degree program. By 20, I was a charge nurse in a busy surgical unit, and I looked about 15. Anyhow, I never in my wildest nightmare would have ever considered having a large family. Much like Abbie’s, my personality could not handle that amount of chaos, mess or noise. There are better options for all concerned. She needs to woman up and make those better choices.