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Kendra & Joe Part 12: Another day, Another Duggar on the Way


Georgiana

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The non-disgraced Little Duggar Family continues to grow.  JoKen have announced another baby on the way.  FJ discusses spacing, who's next to announce, and other assorted topics.

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@curlykate, it's incredible to think that that woman could potentially be a great-great-grandmother at the age of 64 and a great-great-great-grandmother at the age of 80. My grandpa is 80 now and he was only in his late 40s when I was born. My great-great-great-grandmothers were born in the 1830s-1860s! Hell, that woman could feasibly be a great-great-great-great-grandmother and still alive in her late 90s! I know it's incredibly unlikely that each subsequent generation will have a baby in their mid-teens, but it's entirely possible, and that's what's blowing my mind.

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Responding to a couple of posts on the previous thread, Loretta Lynn was not really a grandmother at 29. Her record company made her lie about her age, and that was as far as they felt they could push it back. She was a teenage mother and young grandmother, but at ages that were much more typical. I’ve posted this on FJ about three times now, so my apologies if it’s getting tiresome.

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I was a grandmother at 38. My oldest grandchild is now 16. I could potentially be a great grandmother at 60. I hope not though. 

I mean, some of us were very young mothers. It happens. In my case, not intentionally. 

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My great grandmother became a grandmother in her early 40s, great grandmother in her 60s, and great great grandmother at 89. No teen mothers. Just a lot of early 20s mothers. Which was quite normal in their neck of the woods. Being a grandmother in your 40s was actually pretty common back then. 

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I just need @HarleyQuinn and @JesSky03 to know that from now on I will immediately picture that Spongebob meme every time Jim Bob says anything and I love them both dearly for that. ? 

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I've told this story before, but I was once in a hospital room with a client, who was a young mother (15) who had an infant. A nurse walked in and said "oh, are you grandma?" I was taken aback and inside my brain was screaming "OH NO NO NO, WE CANNOT HAVE THIS." On the way home, I did the math, and realized that I could be grandma. I could EASILY be grandma. That came as quite the shock.

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Uh - was Kendra's mom really born in 1980? 

I thought she and I were maybe the same age - but uh - nope. I was born in 74. 
I could - I suppose be a grandma by now. I mean - my son is 6 so that would be a stretch. But we've been married for 17 years. And were together for 4 before that... 

And my husband does regularly get Grandpa references from people he doesn't know. (He was at the bakery on the island we have a cottage - and the island knows Mr.Meggo - he was a deputy mayor - they KNOW him - and the new bakery lady said our son would have to ask Grandpa if it was okay if he had a cookie. My poor kid was like "Bampa's here? WHERE???") 

 

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I was 23 when I had my eldest (he’s 7 now) so if he became a teen dad I guess I could be a grandparent before I was 40. Even if he went to university and got married to someone he’d been dating for a couple of years first (like I did), I could easily have a grandkid by the time I’m 45. And with fertility treatments advancing, I suppose those hypothetical grandkids could have friends with parents my age, or close to. Even in middle class educated non-fundie circles, there can be a huge range in where generations start.

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I just realized that I am closer in age to Kendras mother than to Kendra. I have to let that sink in. I am in my early thirties and have no children. From the age perspective I could be friends with Kendras mother, but that's it. That's so strange for me right now. 

Edit: It's in the middle of the night but I assume that I will feel the same when I am awake tomorrow after some good sleep.

Edited by Scrabblemaster
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My grandmother was 36 when I was born. She was 16 and my mom was 20 when I was born. Glad I changed that and had my first, last year, at 26. They both said it was really hard financially along with other things, but they love being young enough to have a great relationship with their grandkids. So my grandmother was 64 when she became a great-grandmother. It's odd because my husband's parents are the same age as my grandparents.

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My great-grandparents had that happen. She had her two kids at eighteen and nineteen, they both married on the same day twenty years later and she was a grandma just before turning forty. She was a great-grandma just before turning sixty. I corrected people all the time when we were out together assuming I was out with my grandparents. Nope, my great-grandparents. 

Same with my aunt although in her case a lot of teen pregnancies. She had all three of her kids in her teens, her kids started having kids in their teens and same with some of her grandchildren. She's in her eighties now and her great-great grandchildren are entering their teens. She could easily end up a great-great-great grandma in the next few years. 

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And on the other extreme, my (narcissistic) father believes that at 59 years old, he’s too young to have his youngest kid married and feels he’s way too young to potentially be a grandfather. 

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1 hour ago, Smee said:

I was 23 when I had my eldest (he’s 7 now) so if he became a teen dad I guess I could be a grandparent before I was 40. Even if he went to university and got married to someone he’d been dating for a couple of years first (like I did), I could easily have a grandkid by the time I’m 45. And with fertility treatments advancing, I suppose those hypothetical grandkids could have friends with parents my age, or close to. Even in middle class educated non-fundie circles, there can be a huge range in where generations start.

I agree with this. I am from an upperclass area. I have an old classmate who had her second child at age 27. I have a dog client who had her second child at age 40. Both of their kids are in the same grade at the same middle school. 

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I used to have a work friend who became a grandmother at 34. A girl I went to school with made her mother a grandmother at 30. My cousin was a grandmother at 36 (as was her mother). My mother had me young, but I was 27 when I had my first, so she was 46 when she became a grandmother.

The most shocking I have come across: I used to have a regular customer at a store I worked at who was the ripe old age of 28 when she became a grandmother!

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I married last summer and just turned 26. Both my parents and my in-laws are starting to talk to us (though without pressure) about grandkids. I still feel way too young! I'm in year 4/5 of grad school, and since working through a lot of mental health issues in my adolescence early adulthood, I feel freer now than I did at 19. In some ways I feel like 25 was the start of my "real" youth, at least in attitude, and I want to enjoy that for a while. If all goes to plan (and I realize it never does), I would love to have kids between 30-35. 

If I were Kendra, I would have probably 4 kids by now and be working on a 5th. I just can't imagine.

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9 minutes ago, TZmom said:

 

The most shocking I have come across: I used to have a regular customer at a store I worked at who was the ripe old age of 28 when she became a grandmother!

I heard a story like that a few years ago. It was shocking when I heard it. 

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My cousin became a dad just after he turned 15 and my aunt was 38 at the time and was not happy about it, my uncle was 40 and sadly he died 6 years later and he didn't get to meet my cousin's six other children. 

My sister went to school with a girl who became a granny at 32, she has 6 children and had said after her youngest was born that she was done caring for infants then her 14 year old son gets his girlfriend pregnant, a year or two later. She loves her grandson but she wished her son and his girlfriend had waited a few years before they had children.

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My grandmother was 45 when she became a grandmother and 66 when she became a great-grandmother. The first great-grandkid was born to my 16 year old cousin.

My grandma was pretty young when she had her first child - 18, and she was 35 when she had her last. But, her eldest didn't give her the first grandchild, and the first great-grandchild didn't come from the first grandchild.

Anyways, the eldest great-grandchild is 18 next month, and I think it's entirely possible he'll make her a great-great-grandmother before too long. 

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4 hours ago, Meggo said:

Uh - was Kendra's mom really born in 1980? 

I thought she and I were maybe the same age - but uh - nope. I was born in 74. 
 

DANG! My eldest brother was born in 1977 and has a 5 year old and a 2 year old. And my SIL is only younger than him by 2 years. Granted they were older first-time parents than average (just their path in life). BUT WOW. Christina Caldwell is younger than my own brother. In fact, she is younger than both my brothers. Second bro was born in 1979. I need to let this sink in. ?

Edited by Vivi_music
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Yeah Christina Caldwell could be my Irish twin. It's moderately weird. I'm contemplating the end of my fertility over here. And yet, I could be the grandma of Kendra's spawn. It's a bit of a mindfuck.

The thing I need to remember is that piles of babies do not equate with adulthood or a life or a purpose.

I do hope that these two will not wear themselves out. Kool-aid or not they are kind and decent. And I believe that those are good parenting qualities. May the universal life force only bless them with what they are capable of handling.

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I'm late to the thread drift of age gaps and want to share the gap between my siblings because it's shocking.

There is 10 months and 5 days between my brother and sister. My sister was 5 weeks premature. After my sister's birth, I arrived 11 months and 18 days later. Which means my parents had 3 children under 22 months. 3 under 2. I cannot imagine it. My son is 29 months and we have been trying for our second baby since the beginning of the year. Scary!!

It's even scarier to think about how many siblings I could have ended up with if my mother did not have her tubes tied.

I'm relatively new to these mega families, are there any gaps similar to my parents?

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My siblings are 10 years older than I am. I like to think of myself as the best surprise ever, even though my parents still claim I was "planned."

*narrator* she wasn't 

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38 minutes ago, MaryOrMartha said:

I'm late to the thread drift of age gaps and want to share the gap between my siblings because it's shocking.

There is 10 months and 5 days between my brother and sister. My sister was 5 weeks premature. After my sister's birth, I arrived 11 months and 18 days later. Which means my parents had 3 children under 22 months. 3 under 2. I cannot imagine it. My son is 29 months and we have been trying for our second baby since the beginning of the year. Scary!!

It's even scarier to think about how many siblings I could have ended up with if my mother did not have her tubes tied.

I'm relatively new to these mega families, are there any gaps similar to my parents?

Yes, a couple. The closest is Alyssa (Campana) and Samuel Morton. They had 12 months 3 days between their 1st and 2nd, and 11 months 8 days between their 2nd and 3rd. The 3rd is 4 months old and there's already speculation she's pregnant again.

Other contenders are:

  • Courtney and Christopher Rogers have 16 months between 1st and 2nd, 14 months between 2nd and 3rd, 10 months between 3rd and 4th, 15 months between 4th and 5th, 11 months between the 5th and twins, 20 months (including a miscarriage) between 6th/7th and 8th, 13 months between 8th and 9th, and the 10th is due in June with a 12 month gap. She's known for having a new baby for her "my first Thanksgiving" bib every year from 2010-2019 except 2016 when she had a miscarriage.
  • Jill (Noyes) and David Rodrigues had a miscarriage 16 months before their 1st, 11 months between the 1st and 2nd, 16 months between the 2nd and 3rd, 11 months between the 3rd and 4th, 13 months between the 4th and 5th, 16 months between the 5th and 6th, 18 months between the 6th and 7th, 14 months between the 7th and 8th, 14 months between the 8th and 9th, 40 months (including 3 miscarriages) between the 9th and 10th, 23 months (including 1 miscarriage) between the 10th and 11th, 19 months between the 11th and 12th, and 32 months between the 12th and 13th, the 13th is 12 months old
  • I don't have exact dates but Betsy (Foster) and Joel Catlin had children in 2015, 2016, December 2017 and December 2018.
  • Kristina and Josh Carter- 13 months between the 1st and twins, 20 months between 2nd/3rd and 4th, 21 months between 4th and 5th (they haven't had a new child in 4 years)
  • Katie Morton had 12 months between her 1st and 2nd, 16 months between 2nd and 3rd, 15 months between 3rd and 4th, 14 months between 4th and 5th, 15 months between 5th and 6th, 22 months between 6th and 7th, and 20 months between 7th and 8th. She's now divorced.
  • Kressant (Smith) and Michael Morton had 13 months between 1st and 2nd, 16 months between 2nd and 3rd, 17 months between 3rd and 4th, 17 months between 4th and 5th, 20 months between 5th and 6th, 29 month between 6th and 7th, 21 months between 7th and 8th, the 8th is currently 8 months old. 
  • Rachel (Smith) and Wesley Morton had 16 months between 1st and 2nd, 12 months between 2nd and a late term miscarriage, 18 months between the miscarriage and 3rd, 16 months between 3rd and 4th, 20 months between 4th and 5th, 24 months between 5th and 6th, the 7th is due in May with a 26 month gap.

I know I've mentioned this in the past but according to the Guinness World Records, the most generations alive in a single family has been seven. The youngest great-great-great-great-grandparent being Augusta Bunge (USA) aged 109 years 97 days, followed by her daughter aged 89 (20 year gap), her grand-daughter aged 70 (19 year gap), her great-grand-daughter aged 52 (18 year gap), her great-great grand-daughter aged 33 (19 year gap) and her great-great-great grand-daughter aged 15 (18 year gap) on the birth of her great-great-great-great grandson on 21 January 1989.

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On the flip side, my mom is 76 and has no grandchildren, and quite possibly won't have any. At 47 and single, I'm out of the grandchild race, and my sister, in her early 40's, was unable to have children. Theoretically, my 38 year old brother could father a child, but he's not in a relationship either.

My aunt and uncle had 4 kids and 2 grandkids. Only the offspring of the other aunt and uncle on that side have 2 children each, for the older two, and none (yet) for the youngest.

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