Duggars by the Dozen 37: Your new thread

[Smee]

I have a name that is very common for my generation and my best friend from 5yrs old onwards has the same name. So we were known by our surname initials, as in “Smee A and Smee B”. Then I started dating my husband, and my mum said to me, “you know you can’t marry him because then you’ll be Smee B”. But obviously, I did. Then she dated my brother for a while so we joked that she might become Smee A.

Anyway, my thing about J-named boys wasn’t actually about popularity... I don’t know if it’s the same overseas, but it’s a running joke amongst teachers here that all the naughtiest kids (or worst teenagers, if you teach high school like me) have J-names if they’re boys. Jayden, Jack, Jordan, Josh, Jeremy... Not EVERY J-named kid is trouble, but a very high percentage of the difficult boys have a J-name. Getting a class list of the Duggar family is like a teaching nightmare. I have noticed in recent years that B has also become something of a cursed letter. Blake, Brock, Brayden, Brody, Bailey and even Ben. Girls are less predictable, although if there IS a cursed letter for girls it’s probably K.

[SilverBeach]

On 7/31/2019 at 2:48 PM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

And this is why I gave my daughter a name that you can't find on any GD licence plate magnets in the airport.  

I did the opposite. My name was/is on nothing preprinted, I hated that, and I wanted my DD to be able to get every trinket out there without having to customize it. So I gave her a popular name with the common spelling. 

[Charliemae]

5 hours ago, Smee said:

I have a name that is very common for my generation and my best friend from 5yrs old onwards has the same name. So we were known by our surname initials, as in “Smee A and Smee B”. Then I started dating my husband, and my mum said to me, “you know you can’t marry him because then you’ll be Smee B”. But obviously, I did. Then she dated my brother for a while so we joked that she might become Smee A.

Anyway, my thing about J-named boys wasn’t actually about popularity... I don’t know if it’s the same overseas, but it’s a running joke amongst teachers here that all the naughtiest kids (or worst teenagers, if you teach high school like me) have J-names if they’re boys. Jayden, Jack, Jordan, Josh, Jeremy... Not EVERY J-named kid is trouble, but a very high percentage of the difficult boys have a J-name. Getting a class list of the Duggar family is like a teaching nightmare. I have noticed in recent years that B has also become something of a cursed letter. Blake, Brock, Brayden, Brody, Bailey and even Ben. Girls are less predictable, although if there IS a cursed letter for girls it’s probably K.

This was a "joke" while I was teaching too and I am almost sure (like with most "jokes" about names) that it is racially motivated.  Javier and Jose and Jerome and Jamar were the "worst" kids in the class.   I really dislike these kinds of generalizations, they aren't funny. 

[Smee]

6 hours ago, Charliemae said:

This was a "joke" while I was teaching too and I am almost sure (like with most "jokes" about names) that it is racially motivated.  Javier and Jose and Jerome and Jamar were the "worst" kids in the class.   I really dislike these kinds of generalizations, they aren't funny. 

Interesting. I have never taught a kid with any of those 4 names, largely because most of my teaching career was in a VERY white small town. The Aboriginal population wasn’t big on J-names. I’m also in a country where the ethnic variety is quite different to the US (very few people who are black or Latina, much more Chinese, Korean, Indian, who have the racial stereotype of being super studious). Racism is certainly still present here, but it takes a different form. That kind of “thug” attitude is usually applied to Aboriginal families  But as I said above, they don’t commonly use J-names. It’s interesting that the same generalisation about names has made its way to Australian teachers, where the vast majority of the so-called “worst” kids are white and have names like Joshua and Jackson. I’d say there’s certainly still a classist element to it, though. 

[indianabones]

I went to an all-girls school for a few years, and for me it was Caitlin/Katelyn, Lauren, Jessica and Amanda. Everyone just went by their last name. Once I got to college three of my closest friends were named Amanda and two both had the last name Garcia!

I'm fortunate enough to have a name that is common enough to not turn heads but unusual enough that I've only met about five other people with the same name (think Shannon, or Bianca- they were about as equally as popular at the time of my birth.) Unfortunately, it's becoming more popular as a pet name. Confusing when I'm at the vet's office!

[CarrotCake]

I like my name. It is common enough here in the Netherlands that all people know it but I only met about 5-10 other people with the same name in my life. Never in my year in school and only one the company I work for.

Only thing is that my non-Dutch colleagues find it strange in the beginning but it is not as difficult to pronounce as other Dutch names so also there no problems.

[SassyPants]

5 hours ago, indianabones said:

I went to an all-girls school for a few years, and for me it was Caitlin/Katelyn, Lauren, Jessica and Amanda. Everyone just went by their last name. Once I got to college three of my closest friends were named Amanda and two both had the last name Garcia!

I'm fortunate enough to have a name that is common enough to not turn heads but unusual enough that I've only met about five other people with the same name (think Shannon, or Bianca- they were about as equally as popular at the time of my birth.) Unfortunately, it's becoming more popular as a pet name. Confusing when I'm at the vet's office!

One of those is my daughter’s name (born in 1987) and 2 of the others were strong contenders.

Edited August 5, 2019 by SassyPants

[Screamapillar]

All through middle school I was often referred to as "Girl" My Name because there was also a "Boy" My Name. We had a lot of classes together and our last name started with the same letter, too. I got handed back his graded papers constantly, and vice versa. The joy of having a common but not very popular unisex name. Boy My Name went to a different high school and I was the only one in my high school class with the name.

[Sullie06]

I have a pretty common 80's girl name. It isn't to the levels of Jessica and Jennifer where there were multiple in a class but when you hear it, it takes you back to a certain time period. The thing though, my parents spelled it uniquely. I've met quite a few women with my name over the years but none of them spell it like mine. So I had a common name but still couldn't get the customized plates on my bike because of the spelling. My sister has a less common (for the time) generational name and my brother is a junior. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

On 8/4/2019 at 9:02 AM, SilverBeach said:

I did the opposite. My name was/is on nothing preprinted, I hated that, and I wanted my DD to be able to get every trinket out there without having to customize it. So I gave her a popular name with the common spelling. 

DD would grumble too me about being "the kid whose name isn't on anything" she HATED her name for the longest time, and wanted to go by her middle name which is pretty common and can be found on all kinds of preprinted things. But she said to me last week when she didn't complain about her name that it has grown on her and she actually kind of likes it. She said it mostly because everyone she introduces herself too will comment on what pretty name she has.

One think I will agree is on the common spelling, giving a child a common name with a weird spelling just set the child up for a life time of spelling their name and or telling people how to pronounce it. 

[Smash!]

I have a name that got very popular a few years after I was born. There was always some other kid with the same name in my parallel class but never in the same class. My spelling isn't very common in English/German speaking countries tough. I have to admit it's bothering me a bit that the name is popping up everywhere, even with my spelling nowadays. In the big university where I work there is even a girl with the exact same first and last name. I don't know where she's from tough.
Still, I love him because it sounds good with my last name and my mom knew from very young that she wanted to give her daughter my name if she had one. Which makes it special for me.
When I started travelling I quickly realized what a benefit such a universal name can be: Wherever I went, even Azerbaijan or the far East of Indonesia a lot of people remembered my name which was often enough very helpful.

[AdamsBellybutton]

I'm a late-80s Jessica. In kindergarten I very consciously chose a non-typical spelling for a nickname to differentiate from all the other Jessica/Jessie/Jess-last-initials I was already encountering. I haven't gone by anything else since then--if someone were to call me Jessica anywhere except like, the DMV or the bank, I'd feel like my mom was yelling at me. 

My parents were thoroughly non-creative with all three of us kids' names, top 50 if not top 20 for each of our birth years. Still never got any bike license plates or fridge magnets or anything out of that deal...

 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

3 hours ago, Smash! said:

I have a name that got very popular a few years after I was born. There was always some other kid with the same name in my parallel class but never in the same class. My spelling isn't very common in English/German speaking countries tough. I have to admit it's bothering me a bit that the name is popping up everywhere, even with my spelling nowadays. In the big university where I work there is even a girl with the exact same first and last name. I don't know where she's from tough.
Still, I love him because it sounds good with my last name and my mom knew from very young that she wanted to give her daughter my name if she had one. Which makes it special for me.
When I started travelling I quickly realized what a benefit such a universal name can be: Wherever I went, even Azerbaijan or the far East of Indonesia a lot of people remembered my name which was often enough very helpful.

When I worked in an Urgent Care years and years ago, a woman came in with her daughter, and the daughter had the same 1st name, only this woman spelled the name with J instead of G and the girls both had the same exact middle name, spelling and all. Her daughter was about 3 years younger than mine, as mine was around 4 at the time and this little girls was about a year old. The lady was actually kind of pissed off when I said "Oh wow, my daughter name is all so XXXXXXX XXXX only we spell it with a G." She gave me the dirtiest look and said "Did I need to know that?"  I just gave her prescription and receipt and said have a good day. 

Edited August 5, 2019 by allthegoodnamesrgone

[Peaches-n-Beans]

A bit of a thread drift but I wasn't sure where else to discuss this,

So, the youtube channel Without a Crystal Ball has done several updates on the duggars, most of which are factually incorrect (she claims it's well known that Jill had a hysterectomy, and doesn't know that Jana is a twin with John David) and some with some rather dangerous speculation (particularly about the sexuality of certain members). Her research on the family is poor and when I pointed out that she could be causing harm to the children in these situations with some of the thing she's saying she merely ignored me and proceeded to turn off commenting on her most recent Duggar video. It's rather sad because I used to find her stuff (particularly about the antivax movement) rather informative but now i can't take her seriously. ? 

[Dreadcrumbs]

1 hour ago, Peaches-n-Beans said:

A bit of a thread drift but I wasn't sure where else to discuss this,

So, the youtube channel Without a Crystal Ball has done several updates on the duggars, most of which are factually incorrect (she claims it's well known that Jill had a hysterectomy, and doesn't know that Jana is a twin with John David) and some with some rather dangerous speculation (particularly about the sexuality of certain members). Her research on the family is poor and when I pointed out that she could be causing harm to the children in these situations with some of the thing she's saying she merely ignored me and proceeded to turn off commenting on her most recent Duggar video. It's rather sad because I used to find her stuff (particularly about the antivax movement) rather informative but now i can't take her seriously. ? 

I've been sort of watching KJ's activity and I've been getting the sense that she's ignoring and maybe even blocking anyone who dares challenge her. She made a tweet yesterday that was kind of flouncy even though she hardly gets any comments on her tweets. She's also turned of chat replay on some of her videos.

It's really hard for me to avoid giving her the side-eye.

Edited August 6, 2019 by Dreadcrumbs
*any, wording

[Italiangirl]

I was thinking about the # of people that are now in the Duggar family, if ididn't lost anyone there should be 45 people, given the rate at witch they are growing just this year, they could grow by other 40 in the next 5 years just with kids and spouse... if we also count the engagement even more, it will be interesting to see how they manage to keep everyone employed and sustained by the family business. I don't think that Jb and Michelle will be able to keep track of every family and have a personal relationship with everybody. What will happen then to the less "know" family? Will they shift*from the family values? Or will they just keep going with flow from the main family?

 

*I'm thinking in the same way that Jill and Jinger seem to have found a personal style for their family that shift from the original in witch they was raised, by still beeing fundies.

Edited August 7, 2019 by Italiangirl
Clearing what kind of shift

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, Italiangirl said:

I was thinking about the # of people that are now in the Duggar family, if ididn't lost anyone there should be 45 people, given the rate at witch they are growing just this year, they could grow by other 40 in the next 5 years just with kids and spouse... if we also count the engagement even more, it will be interesting to see how they manage to keep everyone employed and sustained by the family business. I don't think that Jb and Michelle will be able to keep track of every family and have a personal relationship with everybody. What will happen then to the less "know" family? Will they shift*from the family values? Or will they just keep going with flow from the main family?

 

*I'm thinking in the same way that Jill and Jinger seem to have found a personal style for their family that shift from the original in witch they was raised, by still beeing fundies.

Truly, I think  JB and M lost that individual, personal  contact  and relationship about 20+ years, around the time of the laundry fairy incident. While they  might really know Josh, Jana, JD, Jill and Jessa, the rest are likely just a blur of J faces. They will never know their GKs, which is a shame.

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, Italiangirl said:

I was thinking about the # of people that are now in the Duggar family, if ididn't lost anyone there should be 45 people, given the rate at witch they are growing just this year, they could grow by other 40 in the next 5 years just with kids and spouse... if we also count the engagement even more, it will be interesting to see how they manage to keep everyone employed and sustained by the family business. I don't think that Jb and Michelle will be able to keep track of every family and have a personal relationship with everybody. What will happen then to the less "know" family? Will they shift*from the family values? Or will they just keep going with flow from the main family?

 

*I'm thinking in the same way that Jill and Jinger seem to have found a personal style for their family that shift from the original in witch they was raised, by still beeing fundies.

At my last count there are currently 42 members of the family, excluding fetuses and Annabell. By early next year there will be at least a total of 46 members of the family. So yeah, there could easily be a Duggar population explosion soon. 

I think which families shift from the traditional core values (regarding superficial things like fashion, etc.) will depend less on the number of people in the family and more on the individuals in each couple. For instance, Jeremy and Derick have both always come across as more worldly than some of the other Duggars and in-laws have - so it makes sense to me that the Vuolos and Dills would loosen up on certain standards than the other couples have. I think having distance or boundaries with the overall family likely helps too - JinJer (who have distanced imposed boundaries) and the Dills (who have some sort of boundaries, whether self-imposed or not) both appear to be less reliant on the Duggar family in some ways than most of the other married couples do. The exception there is JoStin who don’t seem to be financially reliant on her family, but they both appear to be deeply committed to the beliefs by choice*. More people will definitely be more difficult for Michelle and JimBob to keep in line, but I think adequate brainwashing, family ties, and the right incentives will likely keep a good number of them in line for now. 

*If continued impact of brainwashing can be counted as choice. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

Yeah by Jan 2020 there will be 46 Duggar's. I think 2020 will be a slow year baby wise with only Joy and Jinger having a baby next year.  I would guess Joy will have it late spring early summer, close to the 1 year anniversary of Annabell, and Jing late summer/early fall. 

I can see Kendra announcing again by summer of 2020, Lauren by fall, I think Jessa will wait until early 2021 to get a good 2 years + between Ivy and #4. I see Jill having a 2021 summer baby, that will get Derrick out of Law school. Plus any Duggerling to marry in 2020 which I think we will have 2 or 3 weddings next year, one of them being Jana one or both of the twins and or possible Jason. 

[QuiverFullofBooks]

I wonder at what point the extended family might become overwhelming for those in the TTH, and if they would reconsider their open-door policy. It might be self-regulating, in that those who don’t live there won’t want to come over if it’s a zoo. 

[Dandruff]

15 minutes ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

I wonder at what point the extended family might become overwhelming for those in the TTH, and if they would reconsider their open-door policy. It might be self-regulating, in that those who don’t live there won’t want to come over if it’s a zoo. 

They have plenty of land and could probably build an overflow dwelling once things become regularly zoo-like.

[NakedKnees]

2 hours ago, Dandruff said:

They have plenty of land and could probably build an overflow dwelling once things become regularly zoo-like.

Duggar barracks? ?

Honestly, weather permitting, I would love to sleep in the semi-outdoors on a property like that. I wonder how they're going to change the sleeping accommodations as the extended family grows. 

[fluffernutter]

Hell my husband's family numbers at 20 and I get so overwhelmed by the noise and mess I go hide in a bedroom sometimes. No way could I handle family get togethers of that magnitude. 

[CarrotCake]

If all the Duggars would have stayed in Tontitown, they would now be responsible for 1.1% of the population there.

If everyone gets married and has on average 8 children, that would be over 5% ?

[SorenaJ]

For people who thinks that Jill and Derick won't have a baby until Derick has finished law school - is being in law school harder than being a lawyer? I have not been either. But does it matter too much what Derick is doing, when it'll be Jill taking care of the baby? Or is it in terms of finances?