Chelsy and John Maxwell 7: Not as Beige as Maxhell - Yet

[JermajestyDuggar]

15 minutes ago, Hane said:

The people who believe in those goddamn stupid amber teething necklaces insist that the necklaces have “easy-release” clasps so that babies won’t be strangled. I call bullshit. And Axton’s far too young to be teething, anyway.

I agree that they can still strangle with an “easy release” clasp. But I suppose it’s possible he’s teething. Some start young. But Axton would find much more relief in a cold teething toy.

[usmcmom]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I agree that they can still strangle with an “easy release” clasp. But I suppose it’s possible he’s teething. Some start young. But Axton would find much more relief in a cold teething toy.

I would never have used the teething necklaces but, yes, some start early. My mother called me all kinds of crazy and naive when I told her I thought my son was teething at three months. The very next morning two little teeth had popped through his bottom gum. He had eight teeth at eight months. He is my kid that taught me, in many areas, to never say never. 

A nice teether that has been kept in the fridge or freezer was always helpful for my babies. 

[dripcurl]

On 5/29/2019 at 5:28 PM, CaptainFunderpants said:

I'm totally pro women nursing wherever they want, but during a photo?? Seriously??

You definitely got a downvote from me. Please take your ignorance regarding feeding babies elsewhere. Nothing is showing, and there are real unnatural and twisted things fundies post about that deserve real snark. You basically said  “I'm totally pro women nursing wherever they want, but women nursing wherever they want?? Seriously??”

 

You could not be subtle even if you tried. 

[Fun-Dee]

17 hours ago, dripcurl said:

You definitely got a downvote from me. Please take your ignorance regarding feeding babies elsewhere. Nothing is showing, and there are real unnatural and twisted things fundies post about that deserve real snark. You basically said  “I'm totally pro women nursing wherever they want, but women nursing wherever they want?? Seriously??”

 

You could not be subtle even if you tried. 

When my grandson was just a few months old, two summers ago, my daughter had him out in a town about 20 miles from home.  He was hungry, and it was too warm to sit in the car, so my daughter took him into a Starbucks, found a chair that faced the wall, and nursed him.  An older woman publicly shamed her, saying that my daughter ruined her day! I wish I had been there.  My daughter was so shocked, all she could say was, "It's hot outside!"

[VVV]

1 hour ago, Fun-Dee said:

When my grandson was just a few months old, two summers ago, my daughter had him out in a town about 20 miles from home.  He was hungry, and it was too warm to sit in the car, so my daughter took him into a Starbucks, found a chair that faced the wall, and nursed him.  An older woman publicly shamed her, saying that my daughter ruined her day! I wish I had been there.  My daughter was so shocked, all she could say was, "It's hot outside!"

Wow. I would have said something much more confrontational to the busybody, back in my nursing days. Your daughter is a saint.

[OhNoNike]

I’m lucky I never had anyone say anything to me about nursing publicly.  I only did it a couple of times (my own insecurity rather than caring what others thought).  I did take my last kid into a paint your own pottery place to get a free tile stamped with her footprint. The owner told me I could come and openly breastfeed there anytime I wanted to. She made a point to tell me that, which was so awesome. 

ETA - I don’t think that baby was actually nursing.  He looks like he’s rooting. I mean - I even had friends’ babies do it when I held them when I was nursing my own kid. New babies just do that. But still, who gives a shit. 

Edited June 5, 2019 by OhNoNike

[PennySycamore]

@VVV,  I agree.  It's insane that people are so offended by babies' eating.  

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’ve never encountered anyone saying anything to a mother nursing in public. But it’s legal for a woman to go topless in my city so ?‍♀️

[Granwych]

On 6/3/2019 at 10:21 PM, usmcmom said:

I would never have used the teething necklaces but, yes, some start early. My mother called me all kinds of crazy and naive when I told her I thought my son was teething at three months. The very next morning two little teeth had popped through his bottom gum. He had eight teeth at eight months. He is my kid that taught me, in many areas, to never say never. 

A nice teether that has been kept in the fridge or freezer was always helpful for my babies. 

Frozen minibagels were just the thing with Wychling and later on, Grandwychling.

[ophelia]

10 hours ago, Fun-Dee said:

When my grandson was just a few months old, two summers ago, my daughter had him out in a town about 20 miles from home.  He was hungry, and it was too warm to sit in the car, so my daughter took him into a Starbucks, found a chair that faced the wall, and nursed him.  An older woman publicly shamed her, saying that my daughter ruined her day! I wish I had been there.  My daughter was so shocked, all she could say was, "It's hot outside!"

WTF is wrong with people! I feel really sorry for your daughter right now. I would have been shocked as well and would probably have said something similar. 

I am just totally over the way female bodies are treated so differently than male bodies. A few days ago, it was really hot, I was walking behind a topless guy in the street. I live in the centre of a big german city and the streets in my quarter are always crowded, especially on the weekends. So this half naked guy walks down the street, showing off his muscles and tattoos. That didn't upset me too much, until the moment I overheard a conversation behind me. A little girl, about 6 or 7 years old, asked her mother: "Why is the man not wearing a t-shirt?"  The mother replied: "He doesn't have to. He is beautiful." I got insanely furious and was about to turn around and add: "Even if he didn't have a sixpack, it would still be okay for him to roam the streets fucking naked, because he has a fucking penis." 

I don't hate men, I have no problem with nakedness, but I have a problem with the fact that mothers are shamed for FEEDING!!! their babies and guys just get a free pass whatever they do with their body in public. 

[Fun-Dee]

9 hours ago, VVV said:

Wow. I would have said something much more confrontational to the busybody, back in my nursing days. Your daughter is a saint.

Normally, my daughter is more outspoken.  She was just so taken aback by the comment, and being a new mother, couldn't come up with a good response immediately.  Also, we live in California, which isn't exactly the Bible belt! 

[CyborgKin]

If a necklace has an 'easy release clasp' then what's to stop the baby from choking on it?

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, CyborgKin said:

If a necklace has an 'easy release clasp' then what's to stop the baby from choking on it?

True. Even if it doesn’t strangle the baby, he could put it in his mouth and choke. Either way it’s dangerous. 

[Grannie2times]

I'll always support a nursing mom, photos or not.  My daughter became a mom at 16,  nursed for 12 months, and she pumped at school in the nurse's office on her study hall.  Everyone in her life supported her decision, she even went to her now husband 's prom, pumping before and after the dance.  

 

[SassyPants]

16 minutes ago, Grannie2times said:

I'll always support a nursing mom, photos or not.  My daughter became a mom at 16,  nursed for 12 months, and she pumped at school in the nurse's office on her study hall.  Everyone in her life supported her decision, she even went to her now husband 's prom, pumping before and after the dance.  

 

I had my first 6 weeks before my 10 yr HS reunion. I remember  pumping and dumping in the BR during the event.

[louannems]

On 6/3/2019 at 7:21 PM, usmcmom said:

I would never have used the teething necklaces but, yes, some start early. My mother called me all kinds of crazy and naive when I told her I thought my son was teething at three months. The very next morning two little teeth had popped through his bottom gum. He had eight teeth at eight months. He is my kid that taught me, in many areas, to never say never. 

A nice teether that has been kept in the fridge or freezer was always helpful for my babies. 

All three of my kids had two teeth before four months.  With the first, in 1980, I got caught up in the woo of Hyland's teething tablets.

Edited June 11, 2019 by louannems
Sp

[Bazinga]

Chelsy's long awaited birth story is finally up on her blog. I really hate snarking on a women's birth story, but I honestly have to with all the built up "trauma" she kept saying she went through during this birth.

1) The trauma she experienced was having to go to the hospital vs. getting her home birth and then the doctor needing to use the vacuum and an episiotomy to get the baby out. Chelsy, you are not special because this happened to you. MANY first time moms have to go through this, myself included. Unlucky for me, mine ended up in an emergency c-section. She is lucky that everything went well enough for her to give birth vaginally given the different avenues they tried to deliver. (though I will say the drive to the hospital would have actually been scary- but that is on them choosing to labor/push for so long before heading to the hospital)

2) I feel like most of this could have been avoided if she had just gone to the hospital to give birth in the first place. I really feel like these fundie women should all just plan on their first births in the hospital. Then if all goes well, they know their bodies can handle a delivery safely. Then maybe for birth 2 and beyond, try a home birth.

3) I am glad to hear that her midwives and John were smart enough to take her to the hospital--I just think they waited way to long to make the decision to do so.

All in all, it was a typical birth story of first time moms. Rarely do I hear from a first time mom that everything went 100% smoothly. In fact, in my family alone, 3 out of 4 siblings/ sis-in laws ended with either a vacuum/forceps birth or c-section for their firsts. I am sorry it was so traumatic for her. Maybe she will learn something from this? ?‍♀️

[JermajestyDuggar]

11 minutes ago, Bazinga said:

Chelsy's long awaited birth story is finally up on her blog. I really hate snarking on a women's birth story, but I honestly have to with all the built up "trauma" she kept saying she went through during this birth.

1) The trauma she experienced was having to go to the hospital vs. getting her home birth and then the doctor needing to use the vacuum and an episiotomy to get the baby out. Chelsy, you are not special because this happened to you. MANY first time moms have to go through this, myself included. Unlucky for me, mine ended up in an emergency c-section. She is lucky that everything went well enough for her to give birth vaginally given the different avenues they tried to deliver. (though I will say the drive to the hospital would have actually been scary- but that is on them choosing to labor/push for so long before heading to the hospital)

2) I feel like most of this could have been avoided if she had just gone to the hospital to give birth in the first place. I really feel like these fundie women should all just plan on their first births in the hospital. Then if all goes well, they know their bodies can handle a delivery safely. Then maybe for birth 2 and beyond, try a home birth.

3) I am glad to hear that her midwives and John were smart enough to take her to the hospital--I just think they waited way to long to make the decision to do so.

All in all, it was a typical birth story of first time moms. Rarely do I hear from a first time mom that everything went 100% smoothly. In fact, in my family alone, 3 out of 4 siblings/ sis-in laws ended with either a vacuum/forceps birth or c-section for their firsts. I am sorry it was so traumatic for her. Maybe she will learn something from this? ?‍♀️

I think so many fundies have these extremely high and unattainable expectations for their first birth. They all seem to plan a perfect homebirth. It’s sad really. They are setting themselves up for disappointment. They are so godly and did everything right. How could god not give them a perfect homebirth?

[VVV]

12 minutes ago, Bazinga said:

Chelsy's long awaited birth story is finally up on her blog. I really hate snarking on a women's birth story, but I honestly have to with all the built up "trauma" she kept saying she went through during this birth.

1) The trauma she experienced was having to go to the hospital vs. getting her home birth and then the doctor needing to use the vacuum and an episiotomy to get the baby out. Chelsy, you are not special because this happened to you. MANY first time moms have to go through this, myself included. Unlucky for me, mine ended up in an emergency c-section. She is lucky that everything went well enough for her to give birth vaginally given the different avenues they tried to deliver. (though I will say the drive to the hospital would have actually been scary- but that is on them choosing to labor/push for so long before heading to the hospital)

2) I feel like most of this could have been avoided if she had just gone to the hospital to give birth in the first place. I really feel like these fundie women should all just plan on their first births in the hospital. Then if all goes well, they know their bodies can handle a delivery safely. Then maybe for birth 2 and beyond, try a home birth.

3) I am glad to hear that her midwives and John were smart enough to take her to the hospital--I just think they waited way to long to make the decision to do so.

All in all, it was a typical birth story of first time moms. Rarely do I hear from a first time mom that everything went 100% smoothly. In fact, in my family alone, 3 out of 4 siblings/ sis-in laws ended with either a vacuum/forceps birth or c-section for their firsts. I am sorry it was so traumatic for her. Maybe she will learn something from this? ?‍♀️

I agree with you. I am friends with a retired nurse (RN) who used to assist at homebirths; she said that they never accepted a first-time mom for a home birth. Proven pelvises only.

My first birth was not particularly traumatic other than that my baby had not yet descended when my water broke, so from that point on I was confined to bed in order to avoid cord prolapse. That sucked. But he came out on his own eventually.

[Bazinga]

4 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I think so many fundies have these extremely high and unattainable expectations for their first birth. They all seem to plan a perfect homebirth. It’s sad really. They are setting themselves up for disappointment. They are so godly and did everything right. How could god not give them a perfect homebirth?

Yes, this is exactly what it is!

[divadivine]

@OhNoNike do you live in Indianapolis? I help out at a pottery studio PRN. I actually did infant footprints for a family while the Mom nursed the baby. The baby was hungry. I told the Mom “If you don’t mind, I’ll do the footprints while you’re nursing because the baby will be relaxed & less likely to move around too much.” She was all like “Sure!” So, I got those footprints done, baby was oblivious to what I was doing with the paint & by the time I finished the footprints & cleaning up the feet, the baby was almost finished eating. They added the personalization to the tiles & they were done/ready to pay when the baby was finished nursing. Probably the easiest footprints I’ve done. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I admit I didn’t have major plans for my hospital births. Just general type stuff. And yet they still threw a few surprises at me! My kids are still like that though. Stinkers. 

I will say that it’s not just fundies who do this. I have a family member who spent a ton of time planning her homebirth. And it all ended in an emergency c-section. She was so disappointed. I felt bad for her because she was disappointed. Of course I was happy she had a healthy baby and so was she. Now she schedules her c-sections and is no longer disappointed! Lol. 

[Lgirlrocks]

My mom had three home births. Not fundie at all. She had a doctor deliver all three. When my older brother was born he couldn’t breath. Not sure that it had anything to do with the birth or not. 

I couldn’t imagine having a home birth without a doctor. 

It did seem like she waited way to long before calling anyone. 

[ViolaSebastian]

I'm torn--on one hand, many moms go through what Chelsy went through to deliver their children. On the other, what constitutes a traumatic event can vary widely from individual to individual and can be influenced by a variety of things, including past experiences, pre-existing issues, personality traits, medications, etc. To me, as someone who hasn't given birth, the transfer, vacuum, and episiotomy with no epidural sounds straight up horrible and very, very painful. Even intellectually knowing that many, many women have it much, much worse, it still sounds like a rough time. In any case, I sincerely hope that Chelsy is getting help if she finds that she's having issues related to Axton's birth--even a Christian counselor would be better than just trying to pray it away. 

Edited June 12, 2019 by ViolaSebastian

[JermajestyDuggar]

Chelsy didn’t even seem to plan for the possibility of a hospital birth. She said John packed her bag quickly and would have a bag packed ahead of time next time around. If you have big plans for a homebirth, I think you should also keep the backup plan in mind. So get a bag packed for the hospital. Know the exact route you need to take to that hospital. If they do things like that next time around, maybe she will feel more mentally prepared. Part of the trauma may have been the unknown. She probably hadn’t ever met any of the doctors and it’s possible she had never been to that hospital. Since she’s already experienced one hospital transfer, she may feel better about it if it happens again.