Joy and Austin 26: Please Wear the Appropriate Footgear Around Horses

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 hour ago, feministxtian said:

Little dude was Houdini on steroids! He still hates clothes, shoes and anything that's remotely confining. Gotta love him though, he makes me laugh. 

Do we have the same kid?  My youngest cane home from kindergarten last day of school shouting “yay!  No underwear all summer!”

that was news to me as I didn’t have a no underwear exemption for school hiatuses.

He explained it was his rule.  

Fuck it - he went commando all summer.  Bigger battles to fight.

[libgirl2]

On 4/28/2019 at 12:01 PM, twoandthrough said:

I. Would. Die. 100% without a question. hahaha. Triplets would be SO awesome from the outsider perspective, but I can't even imagine how much work that would be! Though, living near family would help. We are a military family, so my husband is gone often, and we are a two day drive from any family... so no help here.

I had one at one time. I can't imagine 3 at once! And my son was always an easy kid to have around. He was like a little old man and smart as hell. I don't know maybe I'm not that maternal. Maybe I saw the writing on the wall with my ex and knew I didn't want another child with him, then by the time I met my current husband, I had had a hysterectomy. I asked him if he wanted to adopt and thankfully he said no. He is perfectly content with my son. He isn't a kid person either. 

[feministxtian]

25 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Do we have the same kid?  My youngest cane home from kindergarten last day of school shouting “yay!  No underwear all summer!”

that was news to me as I didn’t have a no underwear exemption for school hiatuses.

He explained it was his rule.  

Fuck it - he went commando all summer.  Bigger battles to fight.

The clothing battle with that one is worthless. He's never been into popular clothes, will wear jeans until they're literally falling apart, wears shoes until there are holes in the soles, he despises underwear and has gone commando for years. It's just not worth the battle with him. It never was, it never will be. As long as I could get him to agree to wear clothes, we were good. 

[twoandthrough]

13 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

I had one at one time. I can't imagine 3 at once! And my son was always an easy kid to have around. He was like a little old man and smart as hell. I don't know maybe I'm not that maternal. Maybe I saw the writing on the wall with my ex and knew I didn't want another child with him, then by the time I met my current husband, I had had a hysterectomy. I asked him if he wanted to adopt and thankfully he said no. He is perfectly content with my son. He isn't a kid person either. 

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

[AliceInFundyland]

There was a summer vacation that brother and I went to see the classy grandparents in NYC.

I had been tasked by mom with making sure that brother was more or less in one piece most days. He Was 6-7. I was 9-10 and making my own packing lists.

Grandma hadn't been in charge of us solo before.

One day we were on the bus and it became apparent to us that he had opted to freebird. I am not sure if i was more mortified or grandma. But, it was A Very Big Deal.

(Probably grandma)

 

[SassyPants]

20 minutes ago, twoandthrough said:

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

My daughter is a former MS and HS teacher turned principal. She loves older kids, but does not enjoy babies or toddlers. She and her husband have a 5 year old daughter and are done. Her husband is in his 40’s and does have an older son from a previous relationship.  I think he’d like more, but my daughter is not interested.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

10 minutes ago, AliceInFundyland said:

There was a summer vacation that brother and I went to see the classy grandparents in NYC.

I had been tasked by mom with making sure that brother was more or less in one piece most days. He Was 6-7. I was 9-10 and making my own packing lists.

Grandma hadn't been in charge of us solo before.

One day we were on the bus and it became apparent to us that he had opted to freebird. I am not sure if i was more mortified or grandma. But, it was A Very Big Deal.

(Probably grandma)

 

I come from a family where that would have been a very big deal, too.

when I was 7-8 I was waiting for a friend to get dresssed so we could go out and play and her gramma just took off her nightgown in front of me and I was shocked!

I had no idea some people slept without underpants.  I must’ve said something becusse I will never forget her grams telling me it’s not healthy to sleep in your panties since bodies need to breathe.

I was very confused trying to figure out what exactly needed to breathe ...down there.

28 minutes ago, twoandthrough said:

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

For a lot of us some ages are tougher than others.

if I could have patented by postcard 6th - 9th grade I would have.   

[AliceInFundyland]

@HerNameIsBuffy

It was mainly just Grandma. Grandpa probably laughed.

My parents and their hippie ways didnt give a darn.

My mom was all about not shaving and wearing a bra till absolutely necessary.

That said... Meddling with grandma wasn't worth the hassle. And getting brother into underwear and more or less matching outfits was requested of me for those visits after that.

She was a handful.

[xenobia]

I'm glad that there are women (and men) who want to have kids, maternal or not. I've never seen myself as a mother, and I've opted out on motherhood. This doesn't mean that I hate kids. I like some, and don't like others - just like with adults. Being a mother just wasn't for me. Both me and Mr xenobia have siblings with kids, so fortunately our parents have grandkids even if we didn't contribute. 

All of you who do have kids - kudos to you! You're doing something very difficult and important. 

Edited April 29, 2019 by xenobia

[libgirl2]

3 minutes ago, xenobia said:

I'm glad that there are women (and men) who want to have kids, maternal or not. I've never seen myself as a mother, and I've opted out on motherhood. This doesn't mean that I hate kids. I like some, and don't like others - just like with adults. Being a mother just wasn't for me. Both me and Mr xenobia have siblings with kids, so fortunately our parents have grandkids even if we didn't contribute. 

All of you who do have kids - kudos to you! You're doing something very difficult and important. 

My best friend's niece has 8 kids under the age of 12 or 13. I would not survive. As my mom would say when we would see someone with a lot of kids (I am an only child too) "que alivio" ---- what a relief in Spanish. 

[feministxtian]

54 minutes ago, twoandthrough said:

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

I am SO not maternal. My favorite kid ages are 0-3 months where they stay where you leave 'em and then after they leave home. In between? Not so much. I'm far too selfish and lazy (and cheap). That full time responsibility thing isn't for me. I'm not terribly responsible and still in need of adult supervision. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

3 hours ago, AliceInFundyland said:

She was a handful.

Sounds like your brother was, too!

3 hours ago, feministxtian said:

still in need of adult supervision

I am still waiting for the day I feel like a grown-up.  It really needs to happen soon but I don't  have much hope.

[feministxtian]

18 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I am still waiting for the day I feel like a grown-up.  It really needs to happen soon but I don't  have much hope.

I'm 55 and still waiting. This doesn't bode well for my future. I'd be off getting into more trouble but I'm still sidelined from my fall. I have places to go, things to do and people to piss off...

[Audrey2]

4 hours ago, twoandthrough said:

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

Toddlers are just teenagers without the raging hormones and with many, many fewer verbal skills.

[feministxtian]

18 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I am still waiting for the day I feel like a grown-up.  It really needs to happen soon but I don't  have much hope.

I'm 55 and still waiting. This doesn't bode well for my future. I'd be off getting into more trouble but I'm still sidelined from my fall. I have places to go, things to do and people to piss off...

[nvmbr02]

4 hours ago, twoandthrough said:

I thought I was a kid person until I had them. I think I struggle a lot with being maternal. I have taught middle school in my pre-kid life, and it wasn't bad at all. Maybe I just "get" teenagers better than toddlers. IDK. But I definitely struggle more than most... or at least more than most let on.

I know I am not a baby/toddler person. At all. I mean, I was okay with my own kids and I do okay with my nieces and nephew or friends' kids. But I have never felt an urge to oooh and aaaah over a stranger's baby and have never felt sad that my kids are older now. I LIKE that they are older and that the baby stage is over with. My husband is totally a baby person though. 

[BlondeIdol]

I don’t have any kids but I’ve spent enough time around my friend’s kids, my cousin’s kid’, SIL’s kids, babysitting, as well as my own younger siblings growing up, the youngest of whom is moderately autistic, to know I am NOT a baby/toddler person. I like kids but I found that I really enjoy children once they can start having conversations and I can reason and explain things to them. Communication is key for me. I feel like I usually get a good response.

I do okay with babies, I guess, but when I was a teenager my friends seemed to just melt over babies and while I am not completely disinterested, and they can definitely be cute it is just kind of meh.

I still feel pretty maternal though but I am definitely nervous about possibly having a baby in the future because I feel so awkward with them.

[Meggo]

I am a baby person. I love me some babies. My boy was quiet and completely content as long as someone (anyone) was holding him. He never fussed much.

then he turned three and he made up for lost time. Whooooo boy.

as for clothing battles- we had about three years of refusing to wear shirts with “holes” (button holes- he tried to fight neck holes but we live in Canada- togas aren’t an option)

now he is all about the comfy pants (fair) and usually has some piece of clothing on inside out, backwards or on the wrong feet. It’s actually aroble and hey- you are 6, dressed yourself- good on ya. 

[nvmbr02]

53 minutes ago, BlondeIdol said:

.I still feel pretty maternal though but I am definitely nervous about possibly having a baby in the future because I feel so awkward with them.

I was around a fair amount of babies when I was a child/teen and I still felt a bit awkward with my first but it faded pretty quickly even without being a baby person. Now and then I still feel a bit awkward with someone else's baby and I have had 3 of my own. 

[AliceInFundyland]

4 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Sounds like your brother was, too!

I am still waiting for the day I feel like a grown-up.  It really needs to happen soon but I don't  have much hope.

Little Alice was very well-behaved out of habit. Brother was... What we could call a free-spirit. His nickname as a toddler was "MessMan" and they would sing it to the old Batman theme song

I've mentioned this before - but they used those leashes to stick him to me.

Somewhere along the way - (probably college Alice) I stalled out on well-behaved and fell down a lot.

Brother has progressed on a much more linear path.

Edited April 30, 2019 by AliceInFundyland

[Iamtheway]

7 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I am still waiting for the day I feel like a grown-up.  It really needs to happen soon but I don't  have much hope.

Me too! I am regularly amazed about the fact that I am married, a mother, owns my own house and pay my own bills. I was 13 when my mum was my age. I wonder if she ever looked around the house and was like: ”Someone is going to find out I’m faking it any minute now and assign me a legal guardian”?

3 hours ago, Meggo said:

as for clothing battles- we had about three years of refusing to wear shirts with “holes” (button holes- he tried to fight neck holes but we live in Canada- togas aren’t an option)

now he is all about the comfy pants (fair) and usually has some piece of clothing on inside out, backwards or on the wrong feet. It’s actually aroble and hey- you are 6, dressed yourself- good on ya. 

Haha, this sounds just like Miniway! He always puts his shoes on the wrong foot and then claims he likes them like that. 

[lizzybee]

10 hours ago, BlondeIdol said:

I don’t have any kids but I’ve spent enough time around my friend’s kids, my cousin’s kid’, SIL’s kids, babysitting, as well as my own younger siblings growing up, the youngest of whom is moderately autistic, to know I am NOT a baby/toddler person. I like kids but I found that I really enjoy children once they can start having conversations and I can reason and explain things to them. Communication is key for me. I feel like I usually get a good response.

I do okay with babies, I guess, but when I was a teenager my friends seemed to just melt over babies and while I am not completely disinterested, and they can definitely be cute it is just kind of meh.

I still feel pretty maternal though but I am definitely nervous about possibly having a baby in the future because I feel so awkward with them.

I almost posted about this but decided not to share after I typed it all out. So now I will.  I'm very maternal but I'm not an other people's kids type of person. I was the world's worst babysitter. Just not my thing. Alas, I still wanted children. With my own kids, it's a totally different dynamic. I'm obsessed with them and want to be with them all the time. I sincerely thought a part of me was too selfish to enjoy motherhood - not so. I love those little monsters that are currently sleeping upstairs. I want to be with them every minute awake and asleep. Lucky for me, I can be. All that to say, it's not a hard and fast rule that you have to love children as a whole to enjoy motherhood. Because I don't, I just love mine, and that's really all you need to succeed at parenting. 

[Meggo]

6 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

Me too! I am regularly amazed about the fact that I am married, a mother, owns my own house and pay my own bills. I was 13 when my mum was my age. I wonder if she ever looked around the house and was like: ”Someone is going to find out I’m faking it any minute now and assign me a legal guardian”?

Haha, this sounds just like Miniway! He always puts his shoes on the wrong foot and then claims he likes them like that. 

YES! You point it out and he either says "no they're not" or "I like it that way". For a while you'd ask him about it and he'd blame a teacher/daycare worker. "Miss did it." Really? MISS put your shoes on the wrong feet? "Yeah - Miss did it." Ummm - okay...

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

My favorite is a my friends daughter used to blame her older sister whenever she would have an accident (potty training kind). She thought she was being clever. 

[TZmom]

11 hours ago, Meggo said:

I am a baby person. I love me some babies. My boy was quiet and completely content as long as someone (anyone) was holding him. He never fussed much.

then he turned three and he made up for lost time. Whooooo boy.

as for clothing battles- we had about three years of refusing to wear shirts with “holes” (button holes- he tried to fight neck holes but we live in Canada- togas aren’t an option)

now he is all about the comfy pants (fair) and usually has some piece of clothing on inside out, backwards or on the wrong feet. It’s actually aroble and hey- you are 6, dressed yourself- good on ya. 

Are you me? This is an exact description of my 6 year old. He had an epic meltdown a few days ago because all of his "soft"pants were in the wash and he didn't want to wear jeans.

I am also a baby person. I'm sure I've said this here before...I'd love to have more babies. But then they turn into toddlers and I cannot deal with another toddler. Three was enough.