Seewalds 38: Waiting on Seaweed Three

[Bazinga]

14 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

She probably did. Jinger promoted it first. 

Fair enough. I'm ornery today and just nitpicking.

[Carm_88]

@Bazinga At least Jessa says that it's promoted content. There's quite a few people who do not. If I see any promotion for anything on instagram, I assume it's some sort of an ad. 

[AtlanticTug]

7 hours ago, theotherelise said:

We're planning to do genetic testing on our embryos when we do IVF in a couple months. That means we could decide which sex embryo to put back. But as of right now, we plan to just let the embryologist/RE pick a normal one that looks good (assuming we have one!). They said it's really common for people to ask for the redacted photocopy of their genetic testing results so that they don't see sex.

You have to make so many more decisions when you're trying to conceive with ART that I just can't imagine adding one so big and determinative on top of everything else. If we do a transfer and it takes, however, I imagine we'd just ask them to tell us the sex at that point. If we're lucky enough to have more than one child through IVF, we may make a different choice in the future, who knows!

I did PGS on all my embryos but I live in a jurisdiction where it's illegal to tell us what the sex is. Interestingly the first time we had a success story, with my son, we were able to get the report after the transfer so we knew that he would be a boy as the only two PGS normal embryos we had, both of which were transferred, were boys. With my daughter the report did NOT provide sex information because the genetic sequencing companies started taking a harder line on jurisdictions where you cannot choose the embryo on the basis of sex and stopped providing the information. 

[HurricaneBells]

I do not even pay attention to whether posts state "sponsored by" or "paid partnership" because that's alllll they do. It's either very obvious or I assume it anyway. There may be an exception to that rule here or there but by large, no.

[BernRul]

I feel like it's normal to have some gender preference/disappointment, because most people do imagine what they think they're getting, and get very atttached to the image. I always wanted a girl because I grew up in a family with a lot of girls, but I've accepted that I might only have boys. So I do get it. But I also don't have a lot of sympathy for people who get so caught up in a baby's sex that they're devestated by it. Because your child isn't your* little doll--they don't exist to fit your own fantasy. They're their own person, who is more than their genitals. 

Personally, I've seen a lot of kids who are crushed because they don't live up to their parents' expectations, whether it's because of gender, religion, personality, or interests. That's not the point of having kids. Kids are their own people. If a parent doesn't understand it, if they get so caught up in the fantasy that they can't accept that reality (because, again, we all have our own fantasies about how things will/should be) than they aren't ready to be parents. 

Besides, having a penis doesn't mean your son won't love art or fashion or dress up. Having a vagina doesn't mean the girl will act femine. I kind of hate that that's still a big deal to so many people in 2019. I'm going to raise my boys or girls the same, and wait for them to tell me what they're preferences/interests are. 

*(This is the general you/your, in no way directed at any poster here). 

[lizzybee]

On 2/18/2019 at 10:05 AM, Carm_88 said:

My favourite thing about barbie was changing her clothes. I didn't care what her body looked like, I just wanted to put all the cool 80s and 90s clothes on her! 

Same. My dad liked to joke that "all your Barbies were naked what were you doing?" Not all, Dad, my favorite was definitely not naked and she was the one I was giving all the clothes. ?

Speaking of whom, my Jasmine Barbie was my all time favorite. I washed and brushed her hair and played with her so much she was nearly bald by the time I grew out of playing with them. I learned to french braid on that doll. Gosh, I loved her so much. 

Adding: I have two boys I'm obsessed with, but I definitely would like a daughter. Not because they're not enough, but because I have always wanted a little girl. I've had her named since I was a little girl. Hopefully, someday I'll write that name on a birth certificate and stick a bow on her big enough to put FJ so up in arms you'd have to bring out the parrots. ?

 

[Adrienne83]

On 2/15/2019 at 1:08 PM, Alisamer said:

My sisters and I loved our barbies! We had the townhouse with the elevator where you had to pull the string to make it go up. We also used to lump up a blanket on the bed and pretend the barbies were all lost in the mountains and living in caves in the blanket - survivor style but before Survivor. I had the department store play set, so we'd arrange all the stuff for "sale" in the store and have a barbie be the salesperson and others shopping in the store. 

I then got out of dolls for many years, but about 10 years ago discovered BJDs and now my house is full of dolls, and I'm decorating rooms for them on their shelves sometimes. I also love Transformers, and have since I was a kid. I'm a big fan of letting kids like what they like. They're just kids! My friend has two sons, they have dolls, they have trucks, they like to make things out of big boxes, they're kids.

I had the same one!!! It was bolted to the wall of my grandparents house, lol. ?

[StraightOuttaArkansas]

I wanted to tell a gender/sex story that this FJ conversation directly had a hand in, but I though the conversation had moved on so I am just going to sneak this in before it does

I have a baby boy (as I think everyone knows at this point, I feel a bit jrodd-y every time I mention it now). So this kid is on the small side, like he is at least one clothing size behind in the sizes that run small, in a week he will be two sizes behind (as far as we know he is perfectly healthy), no problem execpt finding things in his size is getting hard because I guess every baby also that size (born in the last 6 months and the coming 3) was or will be a boy? Back to the story. I needed something thicker than little socks to cover his feet and decided to have look for those sock things with the moccasin bottoms. Found them at a store, cute designs for boys (monster in minty green and white), not in his size. Dang, looked a second time several weeks later, still not in his size. Conversation on FJ happens, loving it again. A few days ago at the store again: "ARE YOU KIDDING ME!??! WHERE IS HIS SIZE!?!?!?" There were two different prints in the "boys" neither came in his size. FJ angels/devils show up on my shoulders: "What about the 'girls'?"

Now, let me explain something here, I have looked in girls things lots of times, looking for sale things for my cousins daughter, admiring the girly girly things because I like them. There was one pair of the moccasin socks that I was just so in love with, dark blue with white polka dots, fox on the toe with a tiny pink bow on her ear (flat) and a pink band around the top. I wanted these so much, but, sigh, I have a boy.

Back to the story: I looked in girls section and saw they have FIVE different designs for girls. I lost it. I was so mad. My shoulder FJers said "Do they have the fox ones in his size?" I checked, they did, the only ones at all left in that size. I thought for a minute about the conversation going on here and about how I really hate the idea of gender at all, about how a penis is not really an indicator of anything other than his sex and how he will pee (and even that is easy because German men tend to sit) and decided it was time to put my money where my mouth was. I asked Mr. Outta if he would feel to awkward about it and he was totally fine, thought they were cute actually. So Baby Outta now has adorable fox moccasins and is happily not sliding around on his mats anymore on his warm feets. I was on such a high after choosing those that I went whole hog and got a two piece set of "girly" unicorn (blue and white with hearts, rainbows, unicorns on them) drool bandanas because they make me smile and I really doubt my 9 month old cares. So thank you FJ for sitting on my shoulder ❤️

[Screamapillar]

Last week on Valentine's Day I had laid out an outfit for my 5 month old son to wear: the same Valentine's onesie my daughter had worn on her first Valentine's day and some pants. Our nanny texted me when she got him up: "This is a girl onesie. Do you want him to wear it?"

I had forgotten that the thing had "girl" sleeves (the kind of stitching on some girl onesies that makes the shoulders kind of puffy). I told her, yes, he wouldn't care, and I just wanted them to have both worn that onesie. She put him in it, texted me a picture of him, and it was hilariously too small on him. To the point that any girly puffiness in the sleeves was completely negated by his chubby arms filling in all available space. I told her to take the poor kid out of it for the sake of being comfortable, but at least I have pictures of both of my kids wearing it.

[singsingsing]

According to Jessa's latest Instagram post, she is 25 weeks along. I think that would make her due on June 6th.

[VineHeart137]

Jessa writes a tribute of sorts to Lauren and other moms who have lost pregnancies. She says she and Lauren had the same due date. That must be tough to navigate for both of them.

 

[Carm_88]

That has to be a rough situation for both Jessa and Lauren. I hope that Lauren has made at least some peace with her miscarriage. 

[Cheetah]

Jessa gets a lot of snark but that was a genuinely lovely statement and well-written.  I'm sure this won't be the last time there's one Duggar expecting at the same time another has just had a m/c or is struggling with infertility but to have had the same due date must be especially difficult. 

[Glasgowghirl]

18 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

That has to be a rough situation for both Jessa and Lauren. I hope that Lauren has made at least some peace with her miscarriage. 

Agreed, it will be hard for Lauren and Josiah to see Jessa pregnant and growing a bump. Jessa probably feels a bit guilty that she is still pregnant and Lauren isn't.

[SorenaJ]

51 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

According to Jessa's latest Instagram post, she is 25 weeks along. I think that would make her due on June 6th.

Jessa would be due 1-6 June. She might be 25 weeks and some days along, instead of exactly 25 weeks, giving her a due date between 1-6 June. 

I believe Jinger did that when she was pregnant, she would post those pictures on different days of the week, making her not exactly x number of weeks along. 

[singsingsing]

1 minute ago, SorenaJ said:

Jessa would be due 1-6 June. She might be 25 weeks and some days along, instead of exactly 25 weeks, giving her a due date between 1-6 June. 

Yes, sorry, I thought that went without saying!

[Georgiana]

This is a wonderful post from Jessa.  Truly.  I can't think of anything negative to say about it.  And I commend her for indirectly but still firmly confronting the expectation of women to "keep sweet" or "find comfort in God's Grace/God's plan" or to express that "Everything happens according to God's plan" instead of openly grieving the loss of a much loved life. 

Jessa's pretty close to my pet fundie.  She's strong, she's stubborn, she can be fierce, and she doesn't always keep sweet.  She knows what she wants, she goes after it, and she doesn't often take shit.  I'm happy that Lauren has Jessa in her corner, and that Jessa is a person willing to write a post like this.  Because fundie women are discouraged from being this firm, but it is so incredibly needed.

In addition, the writing on this post is head and shoulders above what we usually see from a Duggar.  I think Jessa has been improving herself since her marriage by reading and working on her writing, and it really shows.  This post is beautifully written, and I would never think it came from a SODRT graduate if I didn't know.  

[viii]

That was a really lovely post. 

[Iamtheway]

On 2/18/2019 at 2:44 PM, JesSky03 said:

I'm a little too excited to be able to buy a dollhouse "for" my kids someday. 

Having an excuse to play with toys and buy children’s books is like half the reason I have a kid at all. 

[AtlanticTug]

I have to admit I read that post in trepidation of when the anti-abortion holocaust diatribe would kick in and am pleasantly surprised that while it was still super Jesus-y, it was not what I feared it would be.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

This is new.

[Carm_88]

2 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

This is new.

We've been discussing it in the Seewalds thread. 

[FleeJanaFree]

That was a kind post.

 

i was surprised when she mentioned they had the exact due date- I was under the impression Lauren was just a few weeks along when she miscarried- how quickly do women get to the doctor for a specific due date prediction? I've never been pregnant and I guess I figured they went in/got that info sometime between 1-3 months. 

[AtlanticTug]

1 minute ago, FleeJanaFree said:

i was surprised when she mentioned they had the exact due date- I was under the impression Lauren was just a few weeks along when she miscarried- how quickly do women get to the doctor for a specific due date prediction? I've never been pregnant and I guess I figured they went in/got that info sometime between 1-3 months. 

I think most dating scans are done around 7-8 weeks. You can't really properly date a pregnancy until you can visualize at least the fetal pole which is around 6 weeks +/- a couple of days.

If you know the day that you ovulated, you'd be able to calculate your due date as of that day. I wouldn't be surprised if they were all peeing on LH sticks to figure out when they're about to release a holy egg.

[Glasgowghirl]

Jessa's post was beautiful, Josiah commented on it saying how blessed he was to have a sister like her. I am glad that they being supported by at least Jessa.