JinJer 47: Sparking J-O-Y

[BachelorToTheRapture]

4 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

So if I knew that I was infertile sex with my husband would be a sin? And any kind of sex that is not man-woman-penetration is a sin? What if you’re pretty fertile but also 100% sure you’re not ovulating? How does this work with being joyfully availible?

Sometime I really wish I could believe in God. It must be awesome to explain anything that’s not logical away with Jesus.

Im not saying this explanation makes sense, but this is what I can remember. I was raised extreme conservative catholic and something, something, it's God's will, you're still being open to life and it's not your fault you can't conceive was the logic here. I think they may have had the sense to say it strengthens the marital bond.

NFP is acceptable to Catholics due to the failure rate, the not spilling your sperm, and "it means you need to talk about it every month and decide if you really want to wait or have a kid right away. With birth control the woman just gets stuck taking it and both partners wish they could initiate the conversation, but they dont know how so they dont have the kids they should" I think my mom has said that verbatim ? 

[HereticHick]

I'd like to derail the abortion & birth control train to talk about this longhaired guitarist in Jinger & Jeremy's living room.

 

 

[justmy2cents]

@HereticHick he was on American Idol last year. 

[libgirl2]

17 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I feel this way about assisted suicide. My mom was suffering so badly when she died at 91, on a ventilator and not coming off. I authorized removal of the vent, and she passed right away, so it wasn't suicide. But she should have been able to end her suffering when she wanted to, which may have been before I was ready to let her go. Death is not the worst thing that can happen to a person, unwilling suffering is. She died exactly one year ago today, and I miss her but I'm not sad because I did not want her unremitting pain to continue. Wonderful woman.

I am so very sorry. You made the best decision.

The best thing I could do for my dad near the end with his brain cancer was put him on hospice. His pain was managed, he had people spending time with him (his nurse was amazing), he was treated with dignity  and allowed to pass away with dignity too. 

[Carm_88]

I think that people with a terminal illness should always have the right to make a decision on their death. I saw my grandfather fight off pneumonia, only to go blind and slowly lose his senses. He was terrified and then the pneumonia came back and it killed him. Once he was out of the palliative care room, nurses made my 89 year old grandfather who was blind, recently, and wanted to stay in bed; get up because they didn't want him to get pneumonia. He cried and thought that there were people moving him in the night, he was calling the nurses all the time because he was terrified. That was no life. Unfortunately, there was no ding with dignity laws then and I don't think he would have qualified anyway because of his mental state. 

I think that everyone should have the right to decide when and where, if they are terminal, so they can get their affairs in order and have their families there. Then it's just peace, I hope. Not 6 weeks of midnight phone calls and the priest being in and out. It was a very long 6 weeks. My Dad and his siblings would do it again, but my Dad and many of his siblings ended up sick from the stress. 

[SilverBeach]

5 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

I am so very sorry. You made the best decision.

The best thing I could do for my dad near the end with his brain cancer was put him on hospice. His pain was managed, he had people spending time with him (his nurse was amazing), he was treated with dignity  and allowed to pass away with dignity too. 

Thank you. I did put my mom on hospice, but I waited too long to do so. They were of great benefit to me though, and mom did die with dignity. She was unconscious when she died, but the staff took great care of her regardless. The hospice I used has monthly support gatherings and quarterly memorial programs, I can't speak highly enough of it.

[PumaLover]

On 2/26/2019 at 5:37 PM, TeaELSee said:

I don’t think so, I don’t see the resemblance. Jinger had her baby a few hours away, (I forgot which city) so she doesn’t live in Laredo.

They went to San Antonio for the birth and her midwife was named Alisa. 

Also, I'm watching commercials on our local station here and legit thought Jeremy and Jinger had moved to our area and had another baby that we didn't know about. 

Spoiler

guy who looks like Jeremy and Alisa the midwife

 

[StraightOuttaArkansas]

@Hashtag Blessed I just wanted to say: beautiful post. You put several my thoughts into words that I would not have thought of, especially the second 2 point. I wish so much that people would step back and look at the bigger picture like this and life support is an excellent analogy in my opinion. I wish the best with the rest of your pregnancy and best delivery possible.

[Hashtag Blessed]

4 hours ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

@Hashtag Blessed I just wanted to say: beautiful post. You put several my thoughts into words that I would not have thought of, especially the second 2 point. I wish so much that people would step back and look at the bigger picture like this and life support is an excellent analogy in my opinion. I wish the best with the rest of your pregnancy and best delivery possible.

Thank you! It's been harder than I ever imagined, but we're in the home stretch. Like I said, we've been incredibly lucky and well cared for. And through all of this, we've been so grateful that at least the baby is developing normally. It's just my body that can't seem to handle this. Thankfully, my life goals never included having eleventy children or I'd be in for one hell of an identity crisis! 

Also lol @ my "second 2 point." Did not realize I typed 2 twice. I definitely have a touch of pregnancy brain.

[nausicaa]

On 2/25/2019 at 12:53 PM, Cleopatra7 said:

Interestingly, when Roe v Wade came down, the only religious bodies that opposed it were the Catholic Church, the LDS Church, and the Orthodox Union. It bared registered for most Protestant churches, who regarded the antiabortion movement and being against birth control to be weird Catholic things, like the rosary or the Mass. If you dig around on the SBC site, you’ll find a document from the 1970s where they say that abortion should be between a woman and her doctor. 

It is interesting how abortion is treated in English literature. I was reading an old murder mystery in which a servant was manipulated into covering for the murderer by her immense guilt about something. One of the "reveals" was that she was actually a Catholic, not a Protestant as everyone assumed, ergo she was guilt-ridden by the abortion she had had. The implication was that she would not have had a such qualms had she been a Protestant. 

It was written in the 1930s and I found the attitude interesting and very unexpected. 

[OyHiOh]

Revisiting the end of life topic for a moment -

If you have a partner or parent or child who might need to make decisions for you at some point, please, please, please for all the good in the universe, talk with them about what you want!  My husband was much older than me and had lung issues related to military service that made him more vulnerable to respiratory infection that most people his age (late 50's).  Because we both knew he was more vulnerable than average, we talked.  We talked regularly, because what you want changes with time and new experience.  There is one point pretty early in his illness where I regret not having one more just to clarify we're on the same page conversation with him but I'm otherwise at peace with the decisions I made when the time came to be his voice.

And I'm oddly grateful that I got to walk through this ICU experience with him.  It's given me nuance of understanding about levels of care and support that I didn't really know about before.  I'll be using what I learned to write my own advanced directives in the next few weeks.

[libgirl2]

19 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

Thank you. I did put my mom on hospice, but I waited too long to do so. They were of great benefit to me though, and mom did die with dignity. She was unconscious when she died, but the staff took great care of her regardless. The hospice I used has monthly support gatherings and quarterly memorial programs, I can't speak highly enough of it.

The hospice I used has similar. People gave us money for his memorial and I donated it to them. 

[front hugs > duggs]

Kind of off topic but relating to the "when life begins" question. Did anyone see about the Honduran woman who gave birth to a stillborn after 6 months of being pregnant while in custody in an ICE center in Texas? Department of Homeland Security is NOT counting this as a death. I'm not sure how they can justify a hypothetical abortion as early as 4 weeks as murder or genocide, and then come right along and ignore that a tragic situation that could have been avoided resulted in a loss of life (at least a life according to them).

Link: Washington Post

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

On 2/26/2019 at 2:17 PM, TeaELSee said:

I popped over to this thread because I was certain somebody would have posted about Jinger and her incessant baby bouncing. I have had babies, I have bounced babies, but she looked so awkward doing it.  She didn’t appear to hold her with proper head support at times. It just bugged me.

Does Jeremy have a dry sense of humor or is he being serious? I can’t tell with him since he is so smug.

I almost did but I figured everyone seemed ok with it and I would just be told "you don't know what you are talking about" I was screaming at my TV that she would stop crying if you STOPPED FUCKING SHAKING HER!  

Jeremy has an entitled sense of humor, that isn't dry humor that is arrogance. 

[Sky with diamonds]

9 hours ago, OyHiOh said:

Revisiting the end of life topic for a moment -

If you have a partner or parent or child who might need to make decisions for you at some point, please, please, please for all the good in the universe, talk with them about what you want!  My husband was much older than me and had lung issues related to military service that made him more vulnerable to respiratory infection that most people his age (late 50's).  Because we both knew he was more vulnerable than average, we talked.  We talked regularly, because what you want changes with time and new experience.  There is one point pretty early in his illness where I regret not having one more just to clarify we're on the same page conversation with him but I'm otherwise at peace with the decisions I made when the time came to be his voice.

And I'm oddly grateful that I got to walk through this ICU experience with him.  It's given me nuance of understanding about levels of care and support that I didn't really know about before.  I'll be using what I learned to write my own advanced directives in the next few weeks.

Extemely important, thanks. 

[twoandthrough]

16 hours ago, front hugs > duggs said:

Kind of off topic but relating to the "when life begins" question. Did anyone see about the Honduran woman who gave birth to a stillborn after 6 months of being pregnant while in custody in an ICE center in Texas? Department of Homeland Security is NOT counting this as a death. I'm not sure how they can justify a hypothetical abortion as early as 4 weeks as murder or genocide, and then come right along and ignore that a tragic situation that could have been avoided resulted in a loss of life (at least a life according to them).

Link: Washington Post

Because that baby wasn't white, so they don't care.

[miss_batson]

 

[Glasgowghirl]

I think assisted suicide should be allowed when people have terminal and degenerative conditions. Safeguards to prevent people being coerced into to it should be in place. Here in UK parliament has voted down bills supporting it, the majority of the UK support it though. A lot of people here who wish to end their life end up having to go to the Dignitas clinic in Switzerland and because they have to travel they end up going before their conditions detairate, if they were given that option in the UK then they may have longer time to spend with loved ones.

[QuiverFullofBooks]

Did we discuss Jinger’s comment in the last episode that she did not stop drinking coffee because of her pregnancy, but because it was damaging her health? It’s possible that she had high blood pressure or something, but I wonder if she consulted a doctor or read a book about fertility and realized that excessive caffeine could be preventing conception.

[nastyhobbitses]

On 2/28/2019 at 10:27 PM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I almost did but I figured everyone seemed ok with it and I would just be told "you don't know what you are talking about" I was screaming at my TV that she would stop crying if you STOPPED FUCKING SHAKING HER!  

Jeremy has an entitled sense of humor, that isn't dry humor that is arrogance. 

Jinger, I know that it's great to catch up on all the mainstream secular music you missed out on in your youth, but "shake it like a Polaroid picture" is not parenting advice. 

[lizzybee]

10 hours ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Did we discuss Jinger’s comment in the last episode that she did not stop drinking coffee because of her pregnancy, but because it was damaging her health? It’s possible that she had high blood pressure or something, but I wonder if she consulted a doctor or read a book about fertility and realized that excessive caffeine could be preventing conception.

I kind of pondered on it myself. I'm someone who gets migraines and I love coffee. My neurologist recommended I cease drinking coffee regularly because caffeine can stop a migraine in its tracks if you catch it soon enough and drink a cup. That can't happen if you're drinking it regularly. Like you mentioned, my FIL switched to decaf because of high blood pressure. Obviously, I don't know why Jinger made that choice. 

[Ms. Brightside]

I had to stop drinking coffee due to anxiety and an inability to fall asleep. The final straw was when I went three full days without sleeping a wink, crying in bed and throughout the day because I was just so tired but my body wouldn't sleep. That happened twice within a two-week period, and I decided to cut coffee out since I felt like I had tried everything in my control other than an expensive sleep study. It has been 2 years, and I still have a cup intermittently (less than once a month) because I do love it, but it has made an incredible difference in my anxiety and sleep. 

[bethover89]

On 2/25/2019 at 5:54 AM, CarrotCake said:

I think the problem with HBC is that it, even though the primary goal is not releasing an egg, if an egg is released anyway it results in the inability to let the fertilized egg develop. Since this could happen, they see it as a sort of abortion.

 

(I don't know if I used the right terminology here, not the usual topics I discuss in English)

I think this is the argument, because the pill also  thins the uterine lining, making it difficult for the egg to implant, but what I find interesting about this is that without the pill, a person is much more likely to have a fertilized egg (which the pill typically prevents) shed without implanting. I just googled this to double check and saw stats of 40-60%. So theoretically a person on a combined pill would be losing fewer fertilized eggs, because the pill helps to prevent fertilization in the first place. There was a time when I was a newlywed with a much more conservative outlook, and after researching that fact settled my mind to comfortably take bcp. Also, I knew someone who got pregnant on a copper iud and was just like, “eh, if it’s god’s Will he can obviously make my birth control method fail” lol. 

[BachelorToTheRapture]

I stopped drinking coffee due to stomach issues, the acidity and caffeine together would make me vomit at least 2x/week. I still have a cup now and then, but I really watch everything else I eat/drink those days to keep myself healthy.

[Sullie06]

On 2/26/2019 at 3:45 PM, Casserole said:

Friendly reminder that pro-choice does not equal pro-abortion. Pro-choice also allows those who believe life begins at conception to make their own choices based on their own wants, needs, and beliefs. 

YES... THIS!!! I have had to remind so many people in my real life lately that Pro-Choice and Pro-Abortion are not the same thing and that being Pro-Choice allow you the right to be anti-abortion and make medical decisions about your body freely and without legal ramifications. Being pro-choice is simply that, your for the right to chose for you and every woman.