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John Shrader 17: Boring Poems and I know it was you, Fredo


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4 hours ago, missy1228 said:

Re: Palmetto Bugs...

When I was in law school in south Georgia (well, middle Georgia really, but south enough for an abundance of Palmetto Bugs), I had a cat who loved to eat them. I lived in this huge old antebellum house that had been divided into apartments, so had lots of cracks all over everywhere. The only part my cat refused to eat were the little legs... so I would always find little stray roach legs all over my floors. Vomit. But, trade off- I only rarely saw an actual live palmetto bug thanks to that wonderful kitty, may she rest in peace.

My brother called me this morning.  just to make sure I could see his facebook post (he's not really computer literate) because it's a picture where he's holding what he called a large cockroach.  I think it's probably a hissing Madagascar roach, I have not made it to facebook yet.

Our late beagle was a true predator - she ate bugs.  Everyone she could catch.  We got pretty good at rescuing spiders before she got to them. She would chase crickets and grasshoppers across the yard and we could always tell when she was chasing one, because she would hop after it instead of running.  One day, Mr. Briefly saw her walk a few feet away from him, open her mouth and a butterfly few out.  Strange dog, but we miss her.

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1 hour ago, Briefly said:

Our late beagle was a true predator - she ate bugs.  Everyone she could catch.  We got pretty good at rescuing spiders before she got to them. She would chase crickets and grasshoppers across the yard and we could always tell when she was chasing one, because she would hop after it instead of running.  One day, Mr. Briefly saw her walk a few feet away from him, open her mouth and a butterfly few out.  Strange dog, but we miss her.

I'm also a proud beagle Mama. My girl likes to play with bugs by chasing them or gently touching them with her paw. I found her out in the woods close to death. The vet thinks she'd been out for months, she was emaciated and had almost no hair left on her due to scrub rash (cuts and scabs and inflammation from the brush), the almost 70 engorged ticks that were removed from her and some had skin growing over the top, and when I got her in my car she lost control of her bowels and all that came out was blood and hundreds of live worms. Getting her in my car wasn't hard though- she approached me and was the most trusting and gentle thing from the beginning. She was definitely someone's poorly treated hunting dog though- she is gun trained and her tail was docked at the height of a 'beagle coop' that some hunters keep their dogs in around here :(

I have since had a number of incidents that illustrated the trauma of her life before me but one that was less traumatic and more surprising was this one. Like I said, she's so gentle and trusting but also very calm and patient with cats and dogs of various levels of anxiousness and things. She also loves kids and she's amazing with my best friend's now 18-month-old. They are best friends. But I had her off leash in an open area designed for dogs to be off-leash in my previous apartment complex last Spring and my ex-housemate's HUGE and rambunctious but anxious and uncoordinated dog went for the toy I'd thrown and I guess startled a baby bird out of its nest? It fell from a very low branch and was walking and flapping it's wings that had only the tiniest bit of feathering on them and squawking for it's mom. My housemate's dog was interested but freaked out by this little one, kind of dancing around it and then hiding behind the tree trunk. I was trying to work out what to do with it to get it to safety and stop my housemate's dog from accidentally stomping on it when my little beagle, 4 months after I found her and still building up her strength, suddenly appeared out of no where so so so quickly and scooped this baby bird up in her mouth whole with its little legs sticking out of it's mouth. She was holding it gently in her mouth. She looked at me so proud, tail wagging, and I screamed in horror and she dropped it at my feet and sat, tail wagging, looking at me.

I scooped her up and the other dog followed me inside. I went back outside and put baby bird back in the nest and the Mama was back by then. I hope it didn't die from shock- I never saw a body. But back inside, my little beagle was crying and too scared to come near me and trying to get back outside. I realized later after some other incidents where she couldn't chase a rabbit or something due to being on a leash and other things that she was terrified I would punish her for not 'getting' the bird and she likely only ever got any love or reinforcement for catching what she chased. ?

My little girl is a quirky little thing but she's so amazing and with the things she's seen me through the past 14 months, I believe she saved my life. I never understood people being all about one dog breed as I've had mutts all my life that I adored- but I really get the love for beagles now. They're all funny and quirky in their own ways but they all have such wonderful temperaments and their stubbornness/intelligence/sociability and so much more makes them so special.

One my favorite of my girl's quirks is that her months of eating grass to survive has made her something of a 'grass connoisseur'. She has a couple favorite types of grass and when she's a patch of those specific types that is super green and not trodden on and tall, she wants to have at it every time. I can spot them now before she even sees them and try and steer her away because she gets constipated when she eats as much as she does when she finds it. I know dogs eat grass when they have an upset stomach but these instances are very much her seeing her favorite 'tasty' kind of grass and having a snack for old time's sake ?

Sorry for being off topic- I just love meeting other people who love or loved their quirky little beagles like I love mine :) 

Obviously, John is still deluded and an idiot and Esther's condescending "Good job" to Boyd blowing out his candles is difficult to listen to ?

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@Aine, your beagle sounds like such a sweetie!  Ours was from a rescue group and had been a pet but her owner died. She was never a hunting dog, but she had a very strong instinct.  She would dig up moles and kill them if she could.  She would bring them to me. She did try to get a baby bird once, it was a mocking bird, but our daughter saw it and managed to get the bird before it got hurt - although the parents apparently remembered our dog because they would dive bomb her for weeks after that if she was out in the yard.  They are such sweet, loving dogs.  I'm glad you were able to rescue your pup and that she has learned to let herself be loved, like they all should be.  Our girl was between 14 and 15 when we had to help her over the Rainbow Bridge.  It was July 30 last year.  We are still heart broken.  Mr. Briefly doesn't want another dog at the moment, we thought about a cat but realized that I am allergic to them. We talked about a small cage animal like guinea pigs but for the moment, we are not getting another pet.  But I am really beginning to think I do want another dog and it may well be another beagle.  But not soon.  Our beagle belonged to our daughter, but when our daughter moved out the dog was old enough that she really didn't want to take her our of our home so she stayed here.  And within a matter of days, the beagle was a Daddy's Girl and Mr. Briefly was just as attached to her as she was to him.  He really isn't ready for another pet yet.

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John shares a very personal story.  In poetry.  He claims that when he was trying to convert Oregon he was depressed (sorry, attacked by Satan) for a whole year.

Actually I think John's depression comes and goes cyclically.  We have often made note of his dramatic  mood swings.  There are meds God has made available out there that can help with depression, John.  They might be more helpful than relying on your present pattern of pretty manic highs, when you get into trouble, and self-flagellating lows.  

However, according to John, the cure for depression is found in Psalm 27.  It will instantly deliver you from Satanic depression.  Invariably and ineluctably.   Bow down to God and be cured.  Until the next time

I do pity Esther.  John and his mood swings must be absolute hell to live with.

Quote

 

"Don't Like Peter Look From Jesus"
(A very personal poem about my struggle in the past with depression for a full year)

I will share some of my story,
In the past like Peter I failed
How I turned my eyes from Jesus,
When life was trying and Satan assailed

Oh how I became discouraged,
When from Christ I turned my eyes
Looking only at all my troubles,
Started listening to Satan's lies

Just like Peter sinking downward,
Losing hope as sorrows crashed
Just like wind and waves for Peter,
How my faith by fears was smashed

Oh the hopelessness and darkness,
When I ceased to seek God's Face
How I sank in deep depression,
As I failed of God's great Grace

For one year I struggled onward,
In weariness I stumbled on
Only God in mercy helping,
Not to quit though hope was gone

Then my Father gently touched me,
Turned my eyes back to His Face
Oh how joy my soul then flooded,
When I came back to that place

Just like Peter eyes were lifted,
Back again to look to Christ
And I bowed in humble worship,
No longer self did fill my sight

Darkness vanished sorrows ended,
Again my night was turned to day
Hope returned as Faith was strengthened,
Burdens lifted oh glorious day

Oh my friend if in depression,
Like me then you now are found
May I simply you encourage,
Bow your self down to the ground

Listen to God's admonition,
Found in 27th Psalm
Truly seek the Face of Yaweh
God the Father also God the Son

I was instantly delivered,
From a year of darkest night
But no pill helped my depression,
Psychiatry didn't restore my sight

It was given as I worshipped,
Humbly exalting God alone
Lifting heart and prayer adoring,
Prayer and Praise before God's Throne

I'm convinced that most depression,
Found in true believers today
In a result of unbiblical living,
From God's Holy Word we've strayed

Let us learn from Peter's story,
Don't look from Jesus or we'll sink
Fix our eyes on Christ the Savior,
From His fullness daily drink.

Let us show so many struggling,
Christ is truly the Life and Way
Even when in darkest trials
Never from His presence stray.

Bro. John Shrader

 

Oh, and he has printed 6.000 more pieces of loo paper.  Praise the Lord.

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I have such an urge to say "Burma Shave" after reading one of John's poems.

Actually the Burma Shave poems were much better than John's.

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The year John was depressed was the year he was having to work for the man and they wouldn't coddle him. He bitched non-stop about every single thing. I'm sure having to work for people who don't think you are a special snowflake was one of the most difficult times in his life. 

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I can't even read it. His persecution-complex is like nobody with straight-up Major Depressive Disorder that I have ever treated. People with depression may have a negative view of others and the world but they also have a negative view of themselves. The latter being the most debilitating. John has the opposite of a negative view of himself and that is why others and the world don't treat him how he wants and why he becomes unhappy. We call that a personality disorder in my field ?‍♀️

 

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Wow. So it only took him a year to find the saving psalm, but he definitely didn’t require psychiatric treatment. Cool, cool. 

Guess now anything anyone has to do to cure depression now is check out that psalm. Sure hope Johnny doesn’t do any counseling on the side.

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1 hour ago, apandaaries said:

Wow. So it only took him a year to find the saving psalm, but he definitely didn’t require psychiatric treatment. Cool, cool. 

Guess now anything anyone has to do to cure depression now is check out that psalm. Sure hope Johnny doesn’t do any counseling on the side.

Really, is there any psychiatric treatment that would help  John?  Somehow I doubt it; the patient first has to agree that there is a problem.

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9 hours ago, Aine said:

I can't even read it. His persecution-complex is like nobody with straight-up Major Depressive Disorder that I have ever treated. People with depression may have a negative view of others and the world but they also have a negative view of themselves. The latter being the most debilitating. John has the opposite of a negative view of himself and that is why others and the world don't treat him how he wants and why he becomes unhappy. We call that a personality disorder in my field ?‍♀️

 

I am in the middle of a major depression spell. I don’t think negative things of other people. I know this will pass (like giving birth to an elephant).  

 

Then again, I choose to be kind. John chooses to see the worst in people. 

Edited by DarkAnts
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FWIW, Psalm 27 is all about being persecuted.  Enemies, foes, bad stuff of all kinds.

Quote

Psalm 27 King James Version (KJV)

27 The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

2 When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell.

3 Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident.

4 One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple.

It goes on and on, even to Daddy and Mommy forsaking you

Quote

10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up.

11 Teach me thy way, O Lord, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies.

12 Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty.

13 I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

14 Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.

It explains a lot about John.

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9 hours ago, apandaaries said:

Wow. So it only took him a year to find the saving psalm, but he definitely didn’t require psychiatric treatment. Cool, cool. 

Guess now anything anyone has to do to cure depression now is check out that psalm. Sure hope Johnny doesn’t do any counseling on the side.

That certainly explains why John definitely doesn’t ever have any depressive episodes anymore, and never ever feels the need to take to his bed for days at a time.

Thank goodness for that major discovery.

I think I’ll print out Psalm 27 and put it by my bed — it sounds like just what I need. 

In no time at all I’ll be as cheery as Emma Mae Jenkins, who also has lots of Bible passages on her bedroom walls!

438283B5-F38F-4A9A-82C9-E7701591B3FC.jpeg.2fc7d9b7d1abdb4888d656d0110883ee.jpeg

(screen capture from https://youtu.be/9UZ8Q2DtYec)

 

Edited by Jellybean
Added photo
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8 hours ago, Granwych said:

Really, is there any psychiatric treatment that would help  John?  Somehow I doubt it; the patient first has to agree that there is a problem.

John's problems aren't what he thinks they are.

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I don't see John anytime in the near future accepting he needs mental health care. 

I think the time in Oregon might be the only time he had to work for someone outside a religious institute. I remember he would post complaints that his boss didn't want him to witness instead of selling cars and that they played music he hated. He also whined a lot about how hard it was to work all day long. His working period is also the time he took his kids to the mall to scream at Santa. 

John melting down over having to work is another reason Daddy is working hard to keep him in Africa. 

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38 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

John melting down over having to work

He probably needs a lot of executive time. 

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5 hours ago, Jellybean said:

In no time at all I’ll be as cheery as Emma Mae Jenkins, who also has lots of Bible passages on her bedroom walls!

I want to shoot Emma Mae with a tranquilizer gun.  If I can't get a clear shot could someone taser her for me?  And get Shrader too while you are at it!

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7 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

I am in the middle of a major depression spell. I don’t think negative things of other people. I know this will pass (like giving birth to an elephant).  

 

Then again, I choose to be kind. John chooses to see the worst in people. 

I'm sorry you are going through a bout of depression. It's tough :( 

You don't need all three to have depression obviously but usually the "negative view of others" takes more of the form of "no one could love me" or "people are just pretending to like me" or "they only like me because I don't show them the real me" and things like that. It's not a paranoid view or that others are all bad or evil or anything but it becomes a skewed thought pattern to the negative and then as humans, we look for confirming evidence (e.g. "I wasn't invited to that dinner by them because they can't stand to be around me" vs "Oh, that must have been an impromptu thing and you can't invite everyone to everything!"). I hope that makes sense?

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7 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

I am in the middle of a major depression spell. I don’t think negative things of other people. I know this will pass (like giving birth to an elephant).  

 

Then again, I choose to be kind. John chooses to see the worst in people. 

Please take good care of yourself! (I'm sure you will, and won't just randomly buy a place, and bother people on another continent, while putting a spouse, children and chickens through the worst - but I wish you all the best, and hope for all the best. Please accept this in the spirit it is intended in. (I can't find a hugging smiley, so here's a cat and a dog smiley: :kitty:and :puppy:)). 

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:hug::group-hug::5624797ec149a_hug1::romance-grouphug:

Because apparently it is my job to provide the emoticons!

The cat and dog are much cuter though.

8 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

I am in the middle of a major depression spell. I don’t think negative things of other people. I know this will pass (like giving birth to an elephant).  

I hope it passes quickly.  Be kind to yourself. 

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5 hours ago, samurai_sarah said:

Please take good care of yourself! (I'm sure you will, and won't just randomly buy a place, and bother people on another continent, while putting a spouse, children and chickens through the worst - but I wish you all the best, and hope for all the best. Please accept this in the spirit it is intended in. (I can't find a hugging smiley, so here's a cat and a dog smiley: :kitty:and :puppy:)). 

My only child is my dog Sr. Winston McFlufkins. He is the reason I get out of bed somedays. He is also the reason I go for walks daily. 

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2 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

My only child is my dog Sr. Winston McFlufkins. He is the reason I get out of bed somedays. He is also the reason I go for walks daily. 

That’s a great name for a dog! 

I’m so sorry that he’s the only reason you get up and go out some days but so glad that you have him.

Sending hugs to you across the pond (apologies if that’s the wrong direction and you’re not in the US — hope they find you anyway!) and best wishes to you and Sr Winston McFlufkins.

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And the Shraders had Bible study.

Quote

Praising the Lord for a great turnout for men's and women's Bible studies Saturday after outreach.

The photos show about 9 non-Shrader men and about 7 women.

Quote

One woman thanked Alatheia for the John and Romans together with the Gospel Tracts. She said, "The Jehovah's Witnesses ask us to give them something for their materials, but you are giving away for free!"

Really? The JWs around here try to give me tracts for free.

Quote

We also had wonderful weekly prayer meeting after the Bible studies, almost two hours, the room was full, and Hope publicly shared how she gave her life to Christ just over a week ago. What a precious testimony. I'll let Esther share more of that wonderful, beautiful, and incredible story how GOD used His mighty Word to work in her heart! Praise the Lord!!!

Two hours!  I hope they give potty breaks.  If Esther shared Hope's story I can't see it.

Quote

We had Michael visit us today, his first Sunday after visiting the last two Thursdays. He was given the Gospel materials just a couple weeks ago. Please pray with us for his salvation.

Run Michael!

Quote

I also want to praise the Lord for our oldest son Enoch. At 16, he is a far better older brother than I was at his age.

Somehow I don't think that is a high bar.

Quote

He truly loves his siblings. He's pictured during our daily family Bible time together with Caleb, our youngest at 13 months old.

Cute picture.  When is Esther due to be pregnant again?

 

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1 hour ago, Palimpsest said:

And the Shraders had Bible study.

The photos show about 9 non-Shrader men and about 7 women.

Really? The JWs around here try to give me tracts for free.

Two hours!  I hope they give potty breaks.  If Esther shared Hope's story I can't see it.

Run Michael!

Somehow I don't think that is a high bar.

Cute picture.  When is Esther due to be pregnant again?

 

Whenever John has the energy to get his pecker up.

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11 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

Really? The JWs around here try to give me tracts for free.

Hm.. maybe there's a misinterpretation there and the person was trying to say "the JW ones are much higher quality, in the local language and have pictures! I can see why yours are free, you couldn't sell these..."

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