Gwen Shamblin 5: She is a shit writer!

[HerNameIsBuffy]

4 hours ago, smittykins said:

Right now, I'm filling mine with miniature Reeses Peanut Butter Cups.

Share, please?

[Briefly]

OK, I have got to find something to eat now!  I had an early dinner, it was the second half of the sandwich I didn't finish at lunch.  I hope that Gwendiot thinks it's ok for me to eat!  I did happen to hit the grocery store the day after Christmas and they had candy on clearance, so we have a boatload of Christmas packaged chocolate that is just screaming for me to come play! 

[SJWaterford]

48 minutes ago, Briefly said:

OK, I have got to find something to eat now!  I had an early dinner, it was the second half of the sandwich I didn't finish at lunch.  I hope that Gwendiot thinks it's ok for me to eat!  I did happen to hit the grocery store the day after Christmas and they had candy on clearance, so we have a boatload of Christmas packaged chocolate that is just screaming for me to come play! 

New Years resolutions don't start for like 3.5 days. So I think we should just all eat what we are craving for the rest of 2018. Pass the cheesecake first, then the reeses please. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

36 minutes ago, SJWaterford said:

New Years resolutions don't start for like 3.5 days. So I think we should just all eat what we are craving for the rest of 2018. Pass the cheesecake first, then the reeses please. 

I'm in.  I just made mac & cheese and I have homemade turtles.  (pecans were purchased, grocery stores around here frown on gleaning.)

[SilverBeach]

Just had lemon cream cheese pie and wine. Let's par-tay!

[RFsurvivor]

 Fajitas and margaritas 

[SuperNova]

My mom came to visit today and we did the junk food tour. I live about an hour from mom and there's a few places to eat that she can't get in her city. We had lunch at a place that has really delicious fried chicken, then we went to a little boutique bakery and had cupcakes and espresso, and finally we went to the local hand-made candy store for a cinnamon candy apple that she says reminds her of the one that she bought at the hot air balloon festival in New Mexico about 20 years ago. I've heard about this damn apple for years and asked local shop if they would be willing to make a few for mom. They said yes and now she's hooked. She visits every few months to buy 2 pre-ordered apples at a time. 

Both my mom (she's 75) and myself (I'm 39) are in pretty good shape and are fairly healthy eaters. But today neither of us gave a single thought to caloric intake and we definitely didn't wait for the growl. It was an awesome treat day and totally worth the bloated feeling I'm now experiencing. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

19 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

Just had lemon cream cheese pie and wine.

tell me more of this glorious sounding pie, please.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Chicken and ham jambalaya with a couple of pieces of homemade fudge for dessert. Ok more like 4 pieces, but they were small.

[quiversR4hunting]

I unwrapped a dark chocolate raspberry truffle before catching up on this thread. I guess that is filling my (pie) hole.

And now I need another. ?

[DaisyD]

My 12 year old made fudge pie for Christmas. The first bite is devine. The last makes you want to never eat again. It's amazeballs.

[formergothardite]

Gwen is getting revenge on me for snarking on her short devotionals by now writing longer ones.  Now I have to read more of her shit writing. Go back to writing super short ones Gwen!

Quote

If you are still struggling, it is not for lack of information – you have all the information you need at your fingertips! It is because you continue to resist dying to your own will. The more you resist, the harder the battle will be, and the fact is, you will never change God’s truths. God provides us with many pleasures, but they have boundaries. Going beyond those boundaries reflects lust and greed, grabbing for more than our share. It also reflects an attitude that you think God won’t provide enough for you Himself – an attitude He simply will not tolerate.

Like your giant house and massive amounts of expensive clothing? Me thinks you have way more than your share in life Gwen. 

Quote

God is not looking for perfection with every bite, but He IS looking for a heart not filled with lust for food. Also, He is not looking for the “appearance” of righteousness. All through scripture, there are those who did not have the “appearance” of righteousness, but they were completely devoted to God. We must stop looking at some other person, and concentrate totally on our OWN relationship with God.

What about a heart filled with lust for material possessions? 

Quote

God wants a covenant relationship with us—with our heart and our very soul. Just like marriage, we don’t know when we begin this relationship just how difficult keeping our commitment may become, but God is perfect in HIS commitment. He can—and will—overlook imperfections because of the love and devotion in our heart. But when the hard times hit, we must not wander.

Easy for someone who lives a privileged life to say. Gwen pretty much gets what she wants when she wants it. She wants rid of her husband and wants a new one? She gets it. She wants a color for a wedding that the bride doesn't want? Gwen gets her way. She wants church members to cut off association with family and friends who criticize Gwen? She seems to win out. FJ snarking on her seems to be the one "hardship" she hasn't been able to defeat but I bet she is trying to get church members to not read here. 

Quote

So get out of the pantry and onto your knees. God eagerly awaits with open arms for us to repent and return to His love, but He leaves it up to us. God can only transform your heart if you give it to Him, and He blesses those whose hearts are devoted to and fully in love with Him. Entering the promised land is not a matter of time, but a matter of decision!

We could easily say to get out of your clothing closet and get on your knees Gwen? How many expensive dresses do you own? Are you willing to give that all up and live a simple life, using the money you spend on your lavish lifestyle to instead help the poor and needy? You aren't? Well maybe you should get the log out of your eye before you start picking at the specks you see in the eyes of others. 

[SilverBeach]

13 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

tell me more of this glorious sounding pie, please.

Easiest pie ever.

1 can sweetened condensed milk

1 block room temperature cream cheese

1/3 cup lemon juice

1 small (8 oz. I believe) container whipped topping

1 graham cracker crust

Whip cream cheese in mixer, add sweetened condensed milk and mix some more until well blended. Add lemon juice and mix until incorporated. Gently fold in (with large spatula, not mixer) whipped topping. Fill crust and place in fridge for at least two hours. If you want to get fancy-schmancy sprinkle grated lemon peel on top. I don't usually bother unless taking the pie somewhere. So very rich and good, a little goes a long way.

 

12 hours ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

homemade fudge

I have a delicious quick recipe for this also.

[Botkinetti]

Gwen may be writing longer devotionals but they are still crap. Long paragraphs of blah blah blah. Love Jesus but love me more. I know everything. Don’t  you dare look behind the curtain and read anything critical about me. 

I think Gwen has existed in a state of adoration for too long and has no idea how to cope with people who refuse to adore her and instead laugh at her.  I hope she isn’t doubling down on her edicts to believers in an effort to regain control.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 minute ago, Botkinetti said:

has no idea how to cope with people who refuse to adore her and instead laugh at her.

But she gives us so much to work with!

5 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

Easiest pie ever.

1 can sweetened condensed milk

1 block room temperature cream cheese

1/3 cup lemon juice

1 small (8 oz. I believe) container whipped topping

1 graham cracker crust

Whip cream cheese in mixer, add sweetened condensed milk and mix some more until well blended. Add lemon juice and mix until incorporated. Gently fold in (with large spatula, not mixer) whipped topping. Fill crust and place in fridge for at least two hours. If you want to get fancy-schmancy sprinkle grated lemon peel on top. I don't usually bother unless taking the pie somewhere. So very rich and good, a little goes a long way.

 

I have a delicious quick recipe for this also.

I have all of those ingredients in the house - thanks!

[quiversR4hunting]

4 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

12 hours ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

homemade fudge

I have a delicious quick recipe for this also.

Is it peanut butter?! My grandmother made the best peanut butter fudge but sadly she has past and I don't have her recipe. 

[SilverBeach]

1 minute ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Is it peanut butter?! My grandmother made the best peanut butter fudge but sadly she has past and I don't have her recipe. 

No, it's dark chocolate but could probably be easily adapted for peanut butter.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Chocolate.  Easy peasy with sugar, evaporated milk, marshmallow cream, vanilla, salt, and chocolate chips.  No spinning a thread, never grainy.  Given to me by an elderly hometown neighbor when I was first married:  Miss Velma's Never Fail Fudge.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

3 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Chocolate.  Easy peasy with sugar, evaporated milk, marshmallow cream, vanilla, salt, and chocolate chips.  No spinning a thread, never grainy.  Given to me by an elderly hometown neighbor when I was first married:  Miss Velma's Never Fail Fudge.

I don't like fudge, but marshmallow cream could change my mind.

An FJ potluck meet up would kick ass.  We need teleporters.

[SilverBeach]

11 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Chocolate.  Easy peasy with sugar, evaporated milk, marshmallow cream, vanilla, salt, and chocolate chips.  No spinning a thread, never grainy.  Given to me by an elderly hometown neighbor when I was first married:  Miss Velma's Never Fail Fudge.

My recipe uses sweetened condensed milk instead of evaporated milk, sugar, and marshmallow cream.

I love that we have turned Gwen Shamblin's thread into a calorie-laden bonanza of indulgence. Fuck her. Happy upcoming New Year to everybody else!

[Botkinetti]

@SilverBeach I will definitely be making your pie. Sounds delicious. I have a recipe for a Key Lime pie that I have made many times although I just use regular lime juice.

1 graham cracker crust

1 can (300 ml) sweetened condensed milk 

125 ml lime juice 

1 cup whipping cream 

combine milk and juice in large bowl. In a separate bowl beat whipping cream into stiff peaks and then fold into milk mixture until well blended.

pour mixture into crust , cover and freeze at least 4 hours. 

Let stand for 15 minutes at room temperature before serving.

 I make this a lot for holiday dinners because it doesn’t have to be made the day you are serving it. It can sit in the freezer for weeks.

[formergothardite]

58 minutes ago, Botkinetti said:

I think Gwen has existed in a state of adoration for too long and has no idea how to cope with people who refuse to adore her and instead laugh at her.

I do believe she thought sending the minions would stop it all. But her mindless minions don't know how to deal with criticism and questions in regards to Gwen and RF. 

And it is funny that her thread has recipes and people enjoying life instead of sitting around waiting to be hungry enough before trying to survive on sips of diet coke and licks of potato chips. 

[cindyluvs24]

While we're on the subject of whipped topping:

One small box of instant Jello chocolate pudding     (or whatever brand is on sale)

3/4 cup milk    (ideally whole milk but I've used skim when that's all there is in the house)

1/2 cup Rum Chata       (sadly, I have not found a cheaper substitute for cinnamon flavored rum)

1/4 cup Godiva chocolate liqueur     (or whatever brand is on sale)

8 oz. tub of Cool Whip  get the Extra Creamy , not the Fat Free version   (or whatever brand is on sale) , thawed

Whisk the first 4 ingredients together, then fold in the Cool Whip.  Pour into ramekins or plastic cups if thats all you have and put in freezer.  Spray some whipped cream on it before serving and pass it off as mousse to your guests.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

22 minutes ago, cindyluvs24 said:

While we're on the subject of whipped topping:

One small box of instant Jello chocolate pudding     (or whatever brand is on sale)

3/4 cup milk    (ideally whole milk but I've used skim when that's all there is in the house)

1/2 cup Rum Chata       (sadly, I have not found a cheaper substitute for cinnamon flavored rum)

1/4 cup Godiva chocolate liqueur     (or whatever brand is on sale)

8 oz. tub of Cool Whip  get the Extra Creamy , not the Fat Free version   (or whatever brand is on sale) , thawed

Whisk the first 4 ingredients together, then fold in the Cool Whip.  Pour into ramekins or plastic cups if thats all you have and put in freezer.  Spray some whipped cream on it before serving and pass it off as mousse to your guests.

I bet swapping coconut rum for cinnamon would make it like an almond joy!

[SJWaterford]

The Remnant peeps sure seem to like to go to the movie theater. Several people say they've seen Greedy Gweenie there and her minions. 

We can FJ potluck at my house!