Jinjer 46: Felicity and Her Hair Coverings

[Melissa1977]

14 minutes ago, nastyhobbitses said:

, regarding the "millennial moms" comment: I do think that Instagram commenters need to chill the fuck out sometimes. Sam and Israel balancing themselves on office furniture while their parents guffaw and take pictures? Yeah, call that shit out as unsafe. Baby is clearly in mom's arms posing for a picture and the caption is obviously tongue-in-cheek? Calm. The fuck. Down. I swear, some people act like every mom posting a picture of their baby on Instagram is Casey fucking Anthony. 

My thoughts exactly. For the time being, we have only seen nice shots of Felicity. Jinger does not seem a crazy mom, so I suspect that if the baby is with no shoes, the most probably reason is that she easily takes shoes and socks off and they probably let her be unless those feet are freezing. (My brother was always barefoot in a tiled floor. Healthy, no colds. Putting him shoes meant tantrums).

I mean, I really suffer for Felicity's future, considering her parents beliefs. But I also think she's a happy baby now and that she's in a safe environtment. 

I think that some people who comment judge pictures too seriously. They comment as if normal actions were irresponsible. But if you think twice, most there are not. 

[just_ordinary]

It will be interesting how her eyes turn out. I was so suprised when I found out that it takes years till the process is finished (I thought only 1-2) and in some rare cases even teenager undergo a late change of eyecolour. 

I will say that I don’t even judge when people let their children stand on kitchen counters.

[TheMustardCardigan]

I hate the Oversensitive Child Safety Police on social media. Kids are gonna do kid things— and guess what, every parent is going to make mistakes sometimes! But generally everything turns out just fine.

 

[Casserole]

I hate the incessant comments about every parenting choice on social media... but also they usually come from a good place.

I vowed to never make a comment... and then a guy I went to high school with had a baby born at 35 weeks. At 3 months old (adjusted age ~2 months old) they had him forward facing in the car. I kept rechecking the post and reading the comments hoping someone would say something. A month later, they had that same little tiny baby at a heavy rock concert, with their seats right up next to the speakers at the stage, WITHOUT EAR PROTECTION, proudly posting about their son's first rock concert. 

Hopefully someone of importance in their life privately texted them or said something. And hopefully they listened, or hopefully they are lucky enough to never have to get in an accident and find out why rear facing is so important. 

[VelociRapture]

When it comes to something small - like the photo of Felicity with the coffee cup - I think it’s silly to criticize them. But if it’s something serious I think it’s absolutrly warranted. I don’t follow any of the people we discuss here, but two examples: 

1. Car seat safety. Car seats can be tricky sometimes and so many of these people don’t seem to know basic car seat safety. Car accidents, even minor ones, can cause serious injuries or death for young children not properly restrained. The Duggars as a group have a poor track record for car seat safety and I see no issue with people commenting or calling them out for it. 

2. Sleep safety. In the US the basic recommendation is that the infants should sleep alone on a firm mattress without any bumpers, toys, pillows, or blankets. They should also be placed down for sleep on their backs. When these recommendations aren’t followed the risk for injuries or death due to suffocation increase. Tori and Zach Roloff we’re pretty bad about this when Jackson was an infant - he was constantly shown asleep in his crib with a blanket. Likewise, I believe Jessa and Ben were criticized in the past for letting Spurgeon sleep unsupervised on their couch or on their bed when he was still an infant.

So, basically, I think if it’s something where serious injury or death could easily occur it’s fair game for commenting. Parents who chose to live very public lives and who choose to expose their children to public lives, like the Duggars, need to be prepared for that. 

[treehugger]

I disagree with the bashing of millennial moms. Yes, people on instagram who freak out about every little thing are fucking annoying, but I am sick to death of everyone blaming millennials for everything. Those moms cannot be exclusively millennials. The millennials I know are sensible, hardworking, responsible adults. FFS, people need to cut it out with the millennial bashing crap. It is so old. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

6 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

It will be interesting how her eyes turn out. I was so suprised when I found out that it takes years till the process is finished (I thought only 1-2) and in some rare cases even teenager undergo a late change of eyecolour. 

I will say that I don’t even judge when people let their children stand on kitchen counters.

My daughters eye did settle until she was almost 6. They would shift from dark blue to light brown, to dark brown back to blue, One day I was sitting on the front steps at our house watching the kids play with friends in the front yard she came up to me to get her bike helmet clipped and I noticed her eyes were green, a color I hadn't seen them be yet. This was just a few months before her 5th birthday, I remember on her 6th birthday seeing her eyes were hazel, and they've stayed that since.  She has beautiful eyes, if I do say so myself, she's 15/16 in this pic. She'll be 19 in about a month. 
 

You can also see why we call her freckles. 

Spoiler

 

[SilverBeach]

15 minutes ago, treehugger said:

I disagree with the bashing of millennial moms. Yes, people on instagram who freak out about every little thing are fucking annoying, but I am sick to death of everyone blaming millennials for everything.

I disagree with every form of ageism, whether it is bashing millennials, gen xers', baby boomers, whatever. I know outstanding people in each of these categories. My DD is a millennial and she is  independent and responsible, as are her friends. I believe in judging people as individuals, not categories.

[Hashtag Blessed]

Perhaps that lady is just bitter at all the new safety rules that have come up since she was a new mom. I recently had a minor argument with my mother about baby powder. She thought I was being crunchy and overprotective but I told her repeatedly that I’m just following the guidelines of the American Academy of Pediatrics. No baby powder! I don’t care what you did in the 80’s! You also smoked with me in the car for years. Sorry mom, but cracking the window didn’t do shit to protect my lungs. Times change, rules change.

[Casserole]

26 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

My daughters eye did settle until she was almost 6. They would shift from dark blue to light brown, to dark brown back to blue, One day I was sitting on the front steps at our house watching the kids play with friends in the front yard she came up to me to get her bike helmet clipped and I noticed her eyes were green, a color I hadn't seen them be yet. This was just a few months before her 5th birthday, I remember on her 6th birthday seeing her eyes were hazel, and they've stayed that since.  She has beautiful eyes, if I do say so myself, she's 15/16 in this pic. She'll be 19 in about a month. 
 

You can also see why we call her freckles. 

  Hide contents

 

That photo is pretty much my exact color (give or take some flecks of gold/yellow right around the pupil) and people argue over whether I have brown or hazel eyes. I always went with light brown to describe myself and my drivers license says brown. When I was applying for my passport at our local government office, the woman I handed the application to said, "no, your eyes are hazel. This form should say hazel." So I have a passport, county ID, and boating license that say I have hazel eyes and a drivers license that says I have brown eyes. Oh, and all of my baby books say I have blue eyes. LOL I have an identity crisis when I think about it. 

Also during/right after crying, my eyes turn bright green. And I am almost 29. Eye colors make no sense to me. 

[SassyPants]

18 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

I disagree with every form of ageism, whether it is bashing millennials, gen xers', baby boomers, whatever. I know outstanding people in each of these categories. My DD is a millennial and she is  independent and responsible, as are her friends. I believe in judging people as individuals, not categories.

And unfortunately EVERY age group has been bashed and generalized at one time or another. This is nothing new or particular to millennials. It’s so odd to me that along the way there’s not been a group that says “ it’s a really crappy practice, let’s not do this to the next: generation, class, new employee, immigrant  group...but it doesn’t happen. Individual people are likely very nice and sensitive, but put together in groups, so many times asshole behaviors and mentality takes over.

[SilverBeach]

1 minute ago, SassyPants said:

And unfortunately EVERY age group has been bashed and generalized at one time or another. This is nothing new or particular to millennials. It’s so odd to me that along the way there’s not been a group that says “ it’s a really crappy practice, let’s not do this to the next: generation, class, new employee, immigrant  group...but it doesn’t happen. Individual people are likely very nice and sensitive, but put together in groups, so many times asshole behaviors and mentality takes over.

Yeah, we baby boomers were bashed quite severely back in the sixties and seventies. Whenever there is a new generation the shit continues, unfortunately. I'm not down for it. I don't quite understand your last sentence though.  Are you saying that there is some merit to generation bashing because of group dynamics? 

[SassyPants]

5 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

Yeah, we baby boomers were bashed quite severely back in the sixties and seventies. Whenever there is a new generation the shit continues, unfortunately. I'm not down for it. I don't quite understand your last sentence though.  Are you saying that there is some merit to generation bashing because of group dynamics? 

I am saying for some reason, nasty seems to prevail when people are grouped together. It’s like people are more willing to be nasty when in a group vs alone. I am sure there’s some psychological or sociological phenomen that explains that unfortunate behavior. The best example I can think of off the top of my head is physician attitudes toward residency. The nicest, skilled and competent MDs that I worked with in my career would recognize that 100 hour work weeks are unsafe as well as grueling, yet the pervasive attitude was “ we survived”, so will they .... Yes, the hours mandated per week have been cut back in recent years, and many MDs disagreed with that change.

[VelociRapture]

I will say about the coffee photo:

1. Not gonna lie, it’s kind of cute.

2. Adding a short disclaimer to a photo like that usually stops most comments from being made. Something like, “Sorry Lissy! Mama drank all the coffee first! ?“ would probably work well since it would let people know the baby isn’t drinking caffeine or at risk for burns from a hot liquid. I do this occasionally on photos myself and it works well. 

[singsingsing]

I have noticed there's a real trend amongst millennials to bash baby boomers. I think a lot of it is in response to baby boomers constantly bashing millennials, but I still hate it. I absolutely hate generation bashing. Generations are arbitrary, loose, vague social categorizations made up of millions upon millions of people, usually spanning 15-20 years. There are good and bad, lazy and productive, stupid and smart, nice and mean, creative and dull, liberal and conservative people in every generation.

To the baby boomers on Facebook who love shitting on millennials: you were the ones who raised us to be delicate snowflakes who expect participation trophies and don't know how to boil water (again, while I have heard stories, I have never met a millennial who even comes close to resembling this caricature, so it can't possibly be a ubiquitous and pervasive as the Facebook memes suggest). It's nice that 'you survived' all the crap you look back on now with superior rose-coloured glasses. The ones who didn't aren't here to tell their side of the story.

To the millennials on Reddit who love shitting on baby boomers: You know plenty of good, ethical, hardworking, liberal-minded baby boomers. Cut it with the generalizations and misdirected hate and focus more on your own generation and how you can prevent it from developing characteristics you deem unworthy. Remember that most of the nazis marching in Charlottesville weren't baby boomers. They were millennials.

I have noticed that millennials and Gen Xers tend to have positive opinions of each other, and millennials also have a positive opinion of Gen Z, and vice versa. We'll see how long that lasts. I have a feeling that the Gen Z kids may come to resent millennials as the generation that complained about everything but did nothing. (Again, generalizations, but if there's going to be a meme from the next generation about millennials, I have a feeling that could be it.)

One last thing: millennials are now in their mid-late 20s to late 30s. Teenagers and college-age young adults are not millennials, they are Gen Z.

[Ticklish]

I think this article has some interesting points about those of us born in the very late 70s and very early 80s, sort of being our own mini-generation. I like to think of myself as part of the Oregon Trail Generation!

https://socialmediaweek.org/blog/2015/04/oregon-trail-generation/

[mollysmom]

1 hour ago, Casserole said:

Also during/right after crying, my eyes turn bright green. And I am almost 29. Eye colors make no sense to me. 

I've never heard anyone else say this but it happens to me too! I have blonde hair/blue eyes but when I cry (or when I'm done crying I guess) my eyes look green. So strange!

[Rachel333]

People get weird about blue eyes. There are so many parents who need to let everyone know that their children have blue eyes! Jill is like that too.

Just personally, I actually think Felicity's dark blue eyes (which I agree are unlikely to stay blue) are prettier than bright blue anyway.

Rambling about my own eyes:

Spoiler

My own eyes were blue until I was about 7. They're definitely not blue anymore; I suppose they're hazel, but the kind of hazel where people sometimes think I have green, grey, or blue eyes. There's definitely brown in there but not enough that I've ever had anyone say I have brown eyes. Since there are several rings of color my eye color can seem to change a lot depending on how dilated my eyes are. My first driver's license said I had green eyes (according to the woman filing it for me) and my current one says hazel.

I'd say mine are closest to this picture I found, with probably a little more blue in there.

 

[just_ordinary]

Wow guys- these are seriously beautiful eyes here.

My eyes are a blue. But not some pretty intense blue. They mostly look greyish. Depending on the light the blue is more intense and in some rare light conditions they look green. Absolutely not as spectacular as the two pictures here. My baby shows already little brown spots but now I will kind of secretly wish they turn out similar as those two examples. 

[TheYoungCurmudgeon]

When my cousin had her first kid, I remember commenting about how blue her eyes were and my cousin immediately said something along the lines of "and they better stay that way".

I do think sometimes people think too much about eye color? When I was a teenager I would never ever EVER write a story with a brown-eyed main character. Usually my characters had green or grey eyes and red hair, which was always a little bit of wish fulfillment for me. I've always felt very self-conscious about having brown eyes and what I have literally described out loud to other people as "dishwater brown" hair.

On the other hand, I have a rare genetic disease which one of the signs for is a build up of copper rings around the eyes and I remember for years after I was diagnosed every single time I went to the doctor there'd be 5-15 medical students who were there to look at my eyes. It made me feel very special even though it meant I was very sick.

[JingerSnaps]

2 hours ago, Ticklish said:

I think this article has some interesting points about those of us born in the very late 70s and very early 80s, sort of being our own mini-generation. I like to think of myself as part of the Oregon Trail Generation!

https://socialmediaweek.org/blog/2015/04/oregon-trail-generation/

As a 1979 child I agree 100%. I grew up in a very different world than my sister who was 5 years older than me. 

[freethemall]

I had a photo on social media about a year ago where my husband was holding my 13 month old and it looked like he was drinking his dad's beer, I made a snarky comment about it. I can only imagine how I'd be ripped apart if I was a public figure.

I also once posted a photo of my son in a winter coat in his car seat because I didn't know you weren't supposed to ever do that. I really wish someone had said something to me because he rode like that countless more times before I learned. Sometimes it's worth telling people they're doing something incorrectly, even if they're offended it'll force them to consider it.

[Ticklish]

24 minutes ago, JingerSnaps said:

As a 1979 child I agree 100%. I grew up in a very different world than my sister who was 5 years older than me. 

My tight group of friends has an age range of 13 years between the oldest of us and the youngest. It's sometimes crazy how different growing up was for the younger two compared to myself and the other older one. 

[MayMay1123]

Child #1 had turquoise eyes for a bit, they turned blue and are now a grayish blue. Child #2 has always had medium blue eyes. Child #3 had blue eyes until he was about 13, now they're green most of the time, sometimes they still look blueish though. The grands both have blue... I'm the only one with brown. 

[Satan'sFortress]

I really wanted a brown-eyed baby.  I love brown eyes!  One baby had brown eyes that stayed brown & the other had bright blue that are now . . . we don't really know---they change to blue, green, or grey depending on what he is wearing,  It is really cool.