Zach & Whitney Bates Part 6: That Thing In The Window Is Creepy

[Coconut Flan]

45 minutes ago, Screamapillar said:

Where's that vomiting emoji when I need it?

       

I live to provide emoticons it seems.

[backyard sylph]

I want so badly for all three of them to just stop. To admit to each other, "We love our lives right now, let's do Godly our way," or some such thing, and support each other in that decision. 

No need to tell me that won't happen; it's patently obvious it won't. And I remember when two of my mom's cousins' families seemed to be competing to have more kids; they sort of joyfully fed each other's frenzy for it. We lost touch with them years ago, but last I remember, they were up to ten and eleven, having kids for the Church. That was forty years ago, and I have sometimes wondered how many kids the kids all had. Their names were pretty common, though, various Marys and Michaels with common surnames that came from Sicily and Calabria.

I had six, and my middle son's girlfriend is the second of five, but it wasn't religion in either case, just unstoppable fertility. 

[nelliebelle1197]

23 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

He wanted to be a mayor. A non fundie woman won the election haha!

I laughed at Whit comment about how Zach cancelled an electoral meeting in order to spend the day with her. Very romantic, but it's not how elections are won. Zach is shy, I wonder if the politic career was his goal or was Gil/Kelly's dream. 

More like Gothard's

[nvmbr02]

On 2/19/2019 at 7:26 AM, Melissa1977 said:

 I don't know parents who let toddlers use scissors unsupervised. And none of my friend's children have cut their own hair, nor my kids neither me when I was little.

I'm surprised for all the posts about kids cutting hair, as if it was normal. Different places, different boundaries, I suppose.

Way late to this discussion but my daughter got a hold of some tiny scissors used to cut infants nails when she was 2 and made pretty layers in her hair and a few small chunks out of my nephews hair. It actually blended quite well. The scissors belonged to my sister, they were in a manicure kit she had for my niece and she left them in the bathroom not even thinking about it. We figured at the time that my daughter and nephew were alone for roughly 3 mins. Kids can be very resourceful.

I cut my sister's hair (specifically some really short bangs) the day before picture day when I was in Kindergarten. I remember it quite well. I though I was helping my mom out since she mentioned she didn't have time to cut my sister's bangs before she went out and left us with my dad for the weekend. I just went and got the scissors out of my mom's sewing kit. 

[19tacos&counting]

I was just looking at the bates grandkid birthday and it hit me Kaci Lynn will be 3 in June. We can be pretty sure at this point that they won’t be having another child before her birthday. Decent chance they won’t deliver another child before Bradley turns 5 in October too. This obviously wasn’t their plan (miscarriage and seeming to be longing for a baby in ig captions) but I imagine this age gap will do wonders for their little family. 3 kids under 5 is still a lot but it’s significantly more manageable than 3 in 2.5-3 years like the Paines/Webster’s.

[miss_batson]

Zach's mini me

 

[QuiverDance]

On 2/6/2019 at 9:11 PM, Hisey said:

Those kids look worried and sad, and defensive. I think Whitney's reaction was horrified, and now the kids are scared that Mommy is upset. 

 

They should be sad, and they should know that Mommy is upset because they did something STUPID (that most kids do at some point) and need to learn from the mistake and know not to repeat the behavior.  Parenting is not all sunshine and roses.  Children do need to be corrected, and that often makes them sad for a time.  Correction is not abuse.

[Hisey]

Nah, I don't think they should be scared for doing a normal childhood thing. Maybe in your home, but not in mine. A healthy response is to laugh, take the scissors away, remind them not to cut their own hair, and buy them a doll with long hair to practice on. 

"Scared"? I never want my kids to be scared of me, least of all because of a few inches of hair. Sounds like you feel differently, which is fine.

[QuiverDance]

1) I didn't mention what goes on in my home.

2) I didn't use the word "scared."  You did.  That is telling.

3) I didn't mention parenting through fear so stating that I "feel differently" about a feeling I didn't express is a tactic you've employed to attempt to make me defend a position I didn't take.  Sorry.  Not doing that.

4) Epic trolling though.  You are always getting better at your game.

[AliceInFundyland]

I was actually encouraged when Kaci and Bradley cut each other's hair. I thought it was a good sign that they felt free enough to do something questionable without being overwhelmed by fear.

(This is Hisey a couple days ago in one of the other Bates threads.)

Guys, I think she is two people. I kid you not.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 minute ago, AliceInFundyland said:

I was actually encouraged when Kaci and Bradley cut each other's hair. I thought it was a good sign that they felt free enough to do something questionable without being overwhelmed by fear.

(This is Hisey a couple days ago in one of the other Bates threads.)

Guys, I think she is two people. I kid you not.

Sometimes I want to hug your brain.  

[AliceInFundyland]

Just now, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Sometimes I want to hug your brain.  

My brain very much appreciates that!

[bal maiden]

On 3/13/2019 at 12:44 AM, AliceInFundyland said:

I was actually encouraged when Kaci and Bradley cut each other's hair. I thought it was a good sign that they felt free enough to do something questionable without being overwhelmed by fear.

(This is Hisey a couple days ago in one of the other Bates threads.)

Guys, I think she is two people. I kid you not.

I don't get why that is incompatible with her saying above that she'd laugh, take the scissors away, and give a doll to practice on?

[melon]

I always kept scissors out of reach.

But,when my oldest son was in 1st grade,he cut his bangs with his safety scissors.Of course,it was time for school pictures.

I still bought the pictures.

My mother could not cut straight.She ended up taking me for trims and such,but there is a picture of me,about 6,missing my front teeth and my crooked bangs.

[bal maiden]

39 minutes ago, melon said:

 

My mother could not cut straight.She ended up taking me for trims and such,but there is a picture of me,about 6,missing my front teeth and my crooked bangs.

I can't cut straight either. I tried doing my daughter's hair once, when she was just under 2. She ended up looking like Spock. I took her to a professional after that ?

[MaryOrMartha]

I managed to convince/bribe my slightly older brother to let me cut his hair to match Jonathan Taylor Thomas'.

Not only did my brother end up sporting a very high fashion style cut, his talented hair stylist also managed to trim the tip of his ear.

Boy, did our mother get quite the shock to see me, frantically running around the house and with my brother dripping blood all over the house.

I would like to say that was the end of my home salon career, but it was not. T'was only the beginning.

[LegHumperBibleThumper]

1 hour ago, MaryOrMartha said:

I managed to convince/bribe my slightly older brother to let me cut his hair to match Jonathan Taylor Thomas

JTT ???

[AliceInFundyland]

8 hours ago, bal maiden said:

I don't get why that is incompatible with her saying above that she'd laugh, take the scissors away, and give a doll to practice on?

If you read further up in the thread it's incompatible with the quote about the kids looking worried and sad.

[BeccaGrim]

I was really glad to see Zach pull over the car where the kid wasn't wearing a seat belt considering his family is notorious for NOT wearing them.

[Kelsey]

It looks like Zach is on the slippery slope of seeing the grey area. He is now able to differentiate between what he calls "honest criminals" and "violent criminals." He seems to have made the connection that some people are making choices that hurt themselves but not necessarily others (recreational drugs as an example) and that it's not as bad as making choices that really do hurt other people. That's huge, imo, for someone who was raised that thinking about something and doing it are totally the same thing.

 

 

Edited March 30, 2019 by Coconut Flan
Removed empty spoiler.

[rebeccawriter01]

1 hour ago, Kelsey said:

It looks like Zach is on the slippery slope of seeing the grey area. He is now able to differentiate between what he calls "honest criminals" and "violent criminals." He seems to have made the connection that some people are making choices that hurt themselves but not necessarily others (recreational drugs as an example) and that it's not as bad as making choices that really do hurt other people. That's huge, imo, for someone who was raised that thinking about something and doing it are totally the same thing.

 

 

It was nice to see that he was not so closed minded in that conversation. I think that working with the public and with people who aren't of the same mindset as his family has done him a lot of good. 

This is a reason that any fundamentalist group or cult or whatever hates to have interaction outside of church. It does open people's minds and creates an environment for rationalization and critical thinking. 

I went to a funeral on Friday for a family member I had not seen in years. As sad as it was to say goodbye, I was struck by the sermon preached and the message that seemed to slap me in the face of all that I believe now as an adult. Long story short, I realized while sitting there trying not to let my eyes roll out of my head, I am able to hold two competing thoughts in my head (or more) and have an actual debate over them internally. I can see a message as an attempt to make someone or some group subservient. And I am not as willing to fall into that trap ever again just to feel like I belong or to make sure people love me. 

I think that Zach is showing signs that maybe he's realizing not all that he was taught as a child is true and that he can make the life he wants with his wife and children without guilt and shame of breaking away from a system that held him and others down. 

[Bobology]

14 hours ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

This is a reason that any fundamentalist group or cult or whatever hates to have interaction outside of church. It does open people's minds and creates an environment for rationalization and critical thinking. 

Beautifully stated

[nokidsmom]

16 hours ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

think that Zach is showing signs that maybe he's realizing not all that he was taught as a child is true and that he can make the life he wants with his wife and children without guilt and shame of breaking away from a system that held him and others down. 

When I learned he was going to work in law enforcement, I had hopes that working with other people outside of fundiedom would open his mind and it seems that it has.   The distinction he made about criminals was important.  

I have to say back in his first courtship days, I honestly thought of him as a bit of a bumpkin and hopelessly following his parents' rules.  He looks to have come a long ways from those days.  

[miss_batson]

ChErin redecoreted Whitney's and Zach's bedroom. Could they get a spin off show? I think its possible. Now with Tori and Michael moving back, and Carlin also working on decorating her house, i think they will have a lot of work. Chad esspecially. ?

Spoiler

 

 

Edited April 5, 2019 by miss_batson
Spelling gone wrong way

[bal maiden]

A Cherin decorating show would be so dull, since Erin has one style, and one style only, that she decorates with. Yawn.