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Dillards 69 : Write Your Own Joke Here


HerNameIsBuffy

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If I make lasagne I usually use cheddar cheese because it's only really me that likes it in my house and we always have cheddar in the house. It would be a waste to buy other cheeses that we won't use up.

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10 hours ago, coffeebean7 said:

 

Her boys are nearly the exact same ages of mine (each within days ) but are already more polite ? Clearly I am doing something wrong...

Like not blanket training? 

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3 hours ago, Shadoewolf said:

Cottage cheese instead of ricotta?? Eww!! My foodie side just gagged. But I like mushrooms.

OK, Italian here (on Mother's side). Neither cottage cheese or ricotta belong in a lasagne. It is supposed to be bechamel in the layers.

Ricotta when baked turns grainy. This is a weird North Americanism to include it in a lasagne.

Cream cheese in a lasagne is just disgusting. Why....

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3 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

:::small voice::: I make it with ricotta because my family likes it, but I prefer lasagna with cottage cheese.

In my defense I am not of Italian descent.

Whispers, I am Italian!

46 minutes ago, AtlanticTug said:

OK, Italian here (on Mother's side). Neither cottage cheese or ricotta belong in a lasagne. It is supposed to be bechamel in the layers.

Ricotta when baked turns grainy. This is a weird North Americanism to include it in a lasagne.

Cream cheese in a lasagne is just disgusting. Why....

As a fellow Italian, I agree about the Béchamel!

2 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

If I make lasagne I usually use cheddar cheese because it's only really me that likes it in my house and we always have cheddar in the house. It would be a waste to buy other cheeses that we won't use up.

I'm not above adding cheddar to my lasagne.

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Lasagna should not be made in a slow cooker. 

My lasagna: 

Beg the chef in the house to make his bolognese. (it's got a wine reduction, lots of meat, and super secret, takes hours)

Go to store. Buy flat lasagna noodles, milk, and unsalted butter. 

make bechamel - butter, flour, stir, add milk (temper), add salt when it turns into cream. Add a tiny bit of nutmeg. 

soften noodles in salted water (so many people don't salt their water. this is important), transfer to ice water, let cool. drain, put paper towels or parchment paper between them if you pull them out of the ice water to cool. 

Oven on, assemble. put bolognese in bottom, layer noodles, bechamel, Parmesan, do that like 8 more times. Bake until it's bubbling and has brown on top. Let it sit for approximately the same amount of time it was in the oven. 

The browning of the cheese is important and you won't get that in a crockpot! How do the noodles not turn to mush? 

 

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Just now, Maggie Mae said:

Lasagna should not be made in a slow cooker. 

My lasagna: 

Beg the chef in the house to make his bolognese. (it's got a wine reduction, lots of meet, and super secret, takes hours)

Go to store. Buy flat lasagna noodles, milk, and unsalted butter. 

make bechamel - butter, flour, stir, add milk (temper), add salt when it turns into cream. Add a tiny bit of nutmeg. 

soften noodles in salted water (so many people don't salt their water. this is important), transfer to ice water, let cool. drain, put paper towels or parchment paper between them if you pull them out of the ice water to cool. 

Oven on, assemble. put bolognese in bottom, layer noodles, bechamel, Parmesan, do that like 8 more times. Bake until it's bubbling and has brown on top. Let it sit for approximately the same amount of time it was in the oven. 

The browning of the cheese is important and you won't get that in a crockpot! How do the noodles not turn to mush? 

 

Think of the recipes that the Duggars have shared, it's all mush.

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I just want to say that I do know the difference between meat and meet, but somehow I got quoted within the 30 seconds it took for me to edit. :)

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21 hours ago, Dandruff said:

By immediate family, I was referring to Derick, Jill, and their two kids.  Can't lose if there's no competition...

That makes much more sense. :)

14 hours ago, coffeebean7 said:

Crock pot lasagna with mushrooms and cottage cheese? ? Those shouldn’t be options. I’m the worst cook and can at least recognize that much.

I'm also not understanding the point of multiple videos documenting her movie night. She seems lonely. 

Her boys are nearly the exact same ages of mine (each within days ) but are already more polite ? Clearly I am doing something wrong...

I often put cottage cheese and mushrooms in my vegetarian lasagna and it usually turns out pretty good. Sometimes we make it with bechemel sauce as well but I don’t really like ricotta so I never use that. 

Regarding your boys I think you are actually doing something right. :)

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Ricotta is one of the easiest things to make at home! So if you live somewhere without ricotta or some milk and heavy cream is cheaper than the tub of ricotta, try making it (recipe below.) I usually make ricotta and mozzarella myself.  The mozzarella recipe i use requires rennet, which I know isn't as easily available, but also tend to be cheaper in the end. 

 

https://www.aspicyperspective.com/fresh-ricotta-cheese-recipe/print/

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I've made crock pot lasagna a few times. I personally don't think it tastes as good as when you make it in the oven but it IS really good! (My recipe......I didn't see Jilly muffin's so I'm not endorsing hers lol)

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11 hours ago, TZmom said:

Obviously you don't have enough cultish religion in your life :) ...and neither do. My kids are way too mouthy.

my brats were born mouthy and it hasn't gotten any better (my "baby" is 28). The delightful thing is that it gets passed down. 

**yes, I refer to my grown kids as brats. They are brats, pains in my ass, have driven me to drink on more than one occasion, however, they are MY brats and I'll beat the crap out of anyone who messes with them. 

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I have made lasagna with cottage cheese. I prefer it to ricotta in lasagna. However, bechamel sauce is very easy to make.  The cottage cheese happens when I am short on time (which is 99% of the time) around dinner time.  And I have been slacking on planning ahead these past couple months, so it feels like it is always dinner time and I am always late. 

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I've never had made with béchamel so I looked up Lidia Bastianich's recipe in Mastering the Art of Italian Cooking. Her recipe for Lasagna Napolitano does not have béchamel OR ricotta in it.  Instead it contains Grana Padano and mozzarella.  It also contains three hard-boiled eggs as did the lasagna that an old Italian-Canadian friend made.  None of the recipes I have for lasagna use béchamel actually.  I do think this varies from region to region.  Maybe béchamel is more of a northern Italian thing?

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The first and only time so far I've made it, I used a cast iron and it was absolutely delicious!! I think I got the recipe off of Food 52.

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the last three nights spinach salad with whatever...all from scratch 

and i have the best book ever for you food lovers

julie and julia 

https://www.amazon.ca/Julie-Julia-Year-Cooking-Dangerously/dp/0316013269/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1542508106&sr=1-1&keywords=julia+and+julie

way better than the movie.  perfect for a xmas present. you will laugh yourself silly 

your welcome...

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Personally, I liked Julia Child's book My Life in France.  You'd think that much of the material about Julia came from her own book.  I actually used the passage where talks about making scrambled eggs for her first lesson at Cordon Bleu to make scrambled eggs for myself.    They were divine!

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One of my really good friends is from Rome. I really want to show her Jill's lasagne recipe and watch her recoil in horror. After a couple beers she has a standard drunken rant about how the UK doesn't know how to make pizza properly and Italian-Americans act like Italy's equivalent of hillbillies (which, given historical immigration patterns....kinda makes sense). 

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4 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

I've never had made with béchamel so I looked up Lidia Bastianich's recipe in Mastering the Art of Italian Cooking. Her recipe for Lasagna Napolitano does not have béchamel OR ricotta in it.  Instead it contains Grana Padano and mozzarella.  It also contains three hard-boiled eggs as did the lasagna that an old Italian-Canadian friend made.  None of the recipes I have for lasagna use béchamel actually.  I do think this varies from region to region.  Maybe béchamel is more of a northern Italian thing?

Your post made my blood pressure go sky high. Sorry this is not addressed to you but to Linda Bastianich. She's clearly a traitor of the motherland ?

Lasagna is typical of Emilia that is a northern region, maybe being herself from Friuli, another northern region with another different culinary tradition (well, technically she was born in Croatia, as we lost that part of Friuli in WWII) Bastianich forgot how to do it.

Anyway lasagna MUST be done with besciamella (bechamel), there's no other way to do it. Lots of besciamella, layers of pasta and ragú covered with besciamella and topped with Parmigiano or Grana Padano. Anything different is a variation and should be labelled as such.

Here you can find the recipe.

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On 11/19/2018 at 4:49 PM, ViolaSebastian said:

Terribly, terribly embarrassing to be part of "that couple" without wanting to be. Also, I'm left-handed and he sat on my left side, of course.

I'm left-handed and my husband isn't. He learned very early in our relationship to sit on my right side at group meals. He's not perfect, but he has his moments. :kitty-wink:

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As we're speaking of Italian food bastardisations - I have never ever had such horrible pizza as I was served in New Zealand. Not even the ubiquitous "Pizza made with Emmental cheese instead of Mozzarella" that you are served in France is as awful. Somehow neither the dough nor the toppings were in any way, shape or form Italian. It feels like some Kiwi went to Italy, returned to NZ, and described pizza to some local who had never seen or heard about pizza before, but for some reason felt called to make it.

I love New Zealand from the bottom of my heart, but people! you need to up your pizza game!

Edited by SweetJuly
Any French people here? Why on earth do you use Emmental instead of Mozzarella?
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I go to Italy almost every summer and I have never seen anything else then lasagna with bechamel.

I made it with ricotta myself once because I wanted to try something different. I actually liked it but it did not feel like lasagna, just some other nice dish. 

9 hours ago, Casserole said:

Ricotta is one of the easiest things to make at home! So if you live somewhere without ricotta or some milk and heavy cream is cheaper than the tub of ricotta, try making it (recipe below.) I usually make ricotta and mozzarella myself.  The mozzarella recipe i use requires rennet, which I know isn't as easily available, but also tend to be cheaper in the end. 

 

https://www.aspicyperspective.com/fresh-ricotta-cheese-recipe/print/

Do you have a recipe available for mozzarella too? I would love to try it once.

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43 minutes ago, SweetJuly said:

I love New Zealand from the bottom of my heart, but people! you need to up your pizza game!

Did they put beetroot on it?! When I was in NZ, they seemingly managed to sneak it into every dish I ordered. Beetroot paella, beetroot burger, beetroot curry etc...  You get the (soggy, purple) picture... Urgh...

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