Josiah and Lauren 12: Usual Duggar Social Media and Drift

[JillyO]

I like the first picture, but in the second one, Lauren does the stupid "adoring fundie wife" gaze... Ugh. Just stop.

 

 

[lumpentheologie]

11 hours ago, apandaaries said:

I believe it’s also published by a Christian publishing company. A friend of mine worked for them in marketing before going to grad school (she was also a very Christian person when she worked for that company).  The concept was hugely popular and and they were able to spin out the “love language” concept into other relationships and other books. 

I’ve  encountered other non religious people who’ve found value in the books, as well, but there is definitely a certain breed of Christian roots/theory involved in that series.

Thanks!  To be honest, I didn't actually read the book, I just looked at the website and that seemed sufficient. 

It didn't really seem like something that needed a whole book, but I feel that way about a lot of self-help books--they could just distill the information into a 7-page pamphlet, but then they couldn't charge you $20 for it. 

[Dandruff]

14 hours ago, JillyO said:

I like the first picture, but in the second one, Lauren does the stupid "adoring fundie wife" gaze... Ugh. Just stop.

 

 

Why is she bending like that?  Is there a Christmas present hidden up his nose?

[Pecansforeveryone]

@lumpentheologie, yes there are plenty of "self-help" authors, Christian and otherwise, who love making a book out of what should be an article at most. Heck anything Joshua Harris had to say could have been summed up in an article. Not that it would hgave been a good article, mind you. 

[just_ordinary]

10 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

@lumpentheologie, yes there are plenty of "self-help" authors, Christian and otherwise, who love making a book out of what should be an article at most. Heck anything Joshua Harris had to say could have been summed up in an article. Not that it would hgave been a good article, mind you. 

Thanks. This whole love language thing reads like every other article in a crappy women’s magazine. There is nothing revolutionary in it. You could get the same message for 5$ (or whatever magazines cost). 

I find it the whole trend of self improvement/analysing rather weird and frankly sometimes quite narcissistic. Maybe because I see some friends putting a lot of pressure on themselves and instead of being more open hide behind some pretty weird self analysed ideas. I believe that sometimes you can think too much about yourself.

[louisa05]

On 12/4/2018 at 5:22 PM, SapphireSlytherin said:

Mine is receiving gifts. I had a hard time with it until I understood it's not a materialistic thing at all. DH is wonderful at thinking of me and handing me something - sometimes it's as simple as a glass of wine or a $5 grocery store bouquet of flowers.
 

As for "acts of service" - if he unloads the dishwasher or does laundry I feel HORRIBLY GUILTY, even though he feels like he's helping. When he does that, it makes me feel like I'm slacking on "my" chores. lol

I'm a gifts person, too. Giving and receiving. Not materialistic stuff--more like just when you think of someone in a small way. I will bring home a Starbucks hot chocolate or a Hostess fruit pie or a pack of M&M's from the grocery store for him for no reason or just buy him his favorite fruit because it was on sale. Stuff like that. And I like when others do that for me. It took Mr. 05 a while to catch on to that. 

I find it interesting that my dad was the exact same way. He would just grab us some small special thing when he was doing regular shopping--all of our lives. He'd come home with two plums for me and green apples for my brother because those were our favorites. Even when he was sick and dying, he would help mom make the grocery list for me to get their groceries and it would say "plums for Louisa" on it or some little thing like that. 

And I LOVE buying Christmas gifts. Not extravagant stuff, but just picking out stuff people will like. A busy body friend told me this week that I am "ridiculous" for buying anyone gifts because we don't have kids and "could skip the whole thing". Apparently, she thinks that without kids, you shouldn't decorate, have gifts, nothing. Christmas shouldn't exist. And all the "we don't buy gifts" rhetoric around Christmas these days just depresses me. You don't have to spend $1000s, but a Christmas without giving to people seems downright depressing to me. 

Mr. 05 is definitely more acts of service. And I have grown to love that as well. He is always quietly doing little things to help me. 

[LittleOwl]

21 hours ago, louisa05 said:

I'm a gifts person, too. Giving and receiving. Not materialistic stuff--more like just when you think of someone in a small way

This is exactly what I tried to get into my Ex's head - he was very materialistic and I am very far from it.  

[melon]

I am a words of affirmation person,and for years,Mr Melon did not understand it,at all.Next, I like Acts of Service.Mr Melon is a Quality Time and Physical Touch.

We got into a huge argument.I felt like he did not sympathize with me.He said,"What do you want me to do?Lay down on the floor and cry??".No,but he could have said,"Oh,Melon.I undersand how you feel..etc".

He plays devil's advocate,frequently.I applied for a job recently.I had an interview,which I thought went well.I have the knowledge,the experience.I did not get the job.The company sent an email.They said I wasn't chosen because I had a lack of experience,qualifications and skills.I have 18 years of experience in that type of job,so I really don't understand why they said this.

I told Mr Melon I had no proof,but I felt I was discriminated because of my age and gender.He said I could not prove it,he's right,I can't.

 

[Mama Mia]

1 hour ago, melon said:

I am a words of affirmation person,and for years,Mr Melon did not understand it,at all.Next, I like Acts of Service.Mr Melon is a Quality Time and Physical Touch.

We got into a huge argument.I felt like he did not sympathize with me.He said,"What do you want me to do?Lay down on the floor and cry??".No,but he could have said,"Oh,Melon.I undersand how you feel..etc".

He plays devil's advocate,frequently.I applied for a job recently.I had an interview,which I thought went well.I have the knowledge,the experience.I did not get the job.The company sent an email.They said I wasn't chosen because I had a lack of experience,qualifications and skills.I have 18 years of experience in that type of job,so I really don't understand why they said this.

I told Mr Melon I had no proof,but I felt I was discriminated because of my age and gender.He said I could not prove it,he's right,I can't.

 

I’m sorry about your job interview . It really is tough to prove discrimination, and it’s so common. 

[Iamtheway]

@melon I don’t know you but I will still say it’s probably their loss. They could have gotten someone motivated with tons of experience. Whoever they chose probably want be working there forever either so discriminating because of age is just stupid. And even stupider is to discriminate because of gender. 

Hope you find something better!

[ati_escapee]

On 12/8/2018 at 9:19 AM, JillyO said:

I like the first picture, but in the second one, Lauren does the stupid "adoring fundie wife" gaze... Ugh. Just stop.

 

 

I wonder what day this was? I realize that I could go look but I don't care that much. I shot a proposal at Silver Dollar City last week. I've seen them there before but didn't think they had been in Branson as much after all the scandals. I am just glad to see Lauren dressed appropriately for the weather. My husband made a comment about someone wearing something ridiculous the other day and (without looking) I said: "it's probably a Duggar." Well, it was Lauren, skirt, no leggings or anything, flats (maybe even sandals??) and it was COLD. 

[louisa05]

30 minutes ago, ati_escapee said:

I wonder what day this was? I realize that I could go look but I don't care that much. I shot a proposal at Silver Dollar City last week. I've seen them there before but didn't think they had been in Branson as much after all the scandals. I am just glad to see Lauren dressed appropriately for the weather. My husband made a comment about someone wearing something ridiculous the other day and (without looking) I said: "it's probably a Duggar." Well, it was Lauren, skirt, no leggings or anything, flats (maybe even sandals??) and it was COLD. 

Some people just don't feel cold. There was a woman at church yesterday wearing cropped pant, no socks and sandals. It was 16 degrees when we left our house. I got cold looking at her. (Only noticed because she and her family brought up the gifts, walking down the center aisle when nothing else was happening--I really don't spend church scoping out everyone's clothes).  But I could see my in-laws going out like that and not even noticing. Mr. 05 never wears a coat until it is around 0. His parents keep their thermostat at 60 max, sometimes lower,  and walk around in shorts and t-shirts in the house year round. I'm always dying of cold in there and no one else seems bothered. When my dad was sick with cancer and very cold all the time, my parents's house would be about 78. So we'd do Christmas Eve at the in-laws's freezing house and I'd be wearing layers on layers and still cold, then the next day we'd go to my parents and jeans and a t-shirt would be too warm. 

[coffeebean7]

Despite the Fundie gaze pose, they are cute pictures.

[TZmom]

1 hour ago, louisa05 said:

Some people just don't feel cold. There was a woman at church yesterday wearing cropped pant, no socks and sandals. It was 16 degrees when we left our house. I got cold looking at her. (Only noticed because she and her family brought up the gifts, walking down the center aisle when nothing else was happening--I really don't spend church scoping out everyone's clothes).  But I could see my in-laws going out like that and not even noticing. Mr. 05 never wears a coat until it is around 0. His parents keep their thermostat at 60 max, sometimes lower,  and walk around in shorts and t-shirts in the house year round. I'm always dying of cold in there and no one else seems bothered. When my dad was sick with cancer and very cold all the time, my parents's house would be about 78. So we'd do Christmas Eve at the in-laws's freezing house and I'd be wearing layers on layers and still cold, then the next day we'd go to my parents and jeans and a t-shirt would be too warm. 

I know what you mean about people who don't feel the cold. I'm always freezing at my brother-in-law's house,  but it's not unusual for him to go out in -40° weather in just a sweatshirt. 

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

14 hours ago, louisa05 said:

So we'd do Christmas Eve at the in-laws's freezing house and I'd be wearing layers on layers and still cold, then the next day we'd go to my parents and jeans and a t-shirt would be too warm. 

I try to remember to dress in layers for Christmas. Even our family's homes that aren't kept especially warm get hot once 15 to 20 people are packed in. But if we get there before the crowd, the same living room might be cool. Easy to put on/take off layers usually do the trick. 

[HarleyQuinn]

On 12/8/2018 at 9:19 AM, JillyO said:

I like the first picture, but in the second one, Lauren does the stupid "adoring fundie wife" gaze... Ugh. Just stop.

 

 

I still don't understand how anyone things this is a good look. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

On 12/10/2018 at 12:04 PM, louisa05 said:

Some people just don't feel cold. There was a woman at church yesterday wearing cropped pant, no socks and sandals. It was 16 degrees when we left our house.

I saw a guy in Iceland yesterday (we just got home - what an amazing place!) who was wearing shorts and flipflops. While the temp was 40°F, the wind was blowing 50mph+ (sustained! with higher gusts). 

I was in ALL the layers. lol

[Carm_88]

I used to meet a guy when I was in university wearing flip flops, a tshirt, and shorts when I was wearing a parka, snowpants, winter boots, a hat, a scarf, and mittens. I probably would have put on more if I could have still walked.

[AliceInFundyland]

@melon Just a big old hug to you. Job hunting is sooo hard. I will have to start by late next year and am worried now.

No two people are the same about regulating their body temperature. I find this particularly true in more moderate climates like PNW. We get all sorts of ensembles. And temperatures going 30-40 degrees from am to pm. Plus the rain.

[SilverBeach]

I know the discussion has kinda moved on, but I take all pop psychology, including love languages, as a fun, lightweight thing. Nobody is going to get a deep understanding of anybody from the superficial information pop psychology provides.

I won an EEOC case for non-selection due to age discrimination. It is possible.

[melon]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I know the discussion has kinda moved on, but I take all pop psychology, including love languages, as a fun, lightweight thing. Nobody is going to get a deep understanding of anybody from the superficial information pop psychology provides.

I won an EEOC case for non-selection due to age discrimination. It is possible.

Can you tell me more about this,Silver Beach?I'm not sure exactly what EEOC means.Equal Opportunity?

Thanks to everyone for the kind words!

[SilverBeach]

1 minute ago, melon said:

Can you tell me more about this,Silver Beach?I'm not sure exactly what EEOC means. Equal Opportunity?

Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. It's US Federal. Depending on the size of the company in question, age discrimination laws apply. Lots of information online. If you are near a metro area, there's an office you can visit for assistance, or you can start a case on line. It's free. I didn't use a lawyer, but I'm a good writer and work with government contracts, so details don't bother me. However, you can certainly retain counsel. If a person younger than 40 was selected, especially a male, with no greater or even lesser qualifications than you, you may have a prima facie case (on two grounds) like I did. The company has to reveal this information after you file. I had a job and no longer wanted the one where they discriminated against me, so I took money instead. I was able to name the amount I wanted and to this day think I asked for too little as they agreed too quickly. It was nice.

[Timetostoplurking]

7 hours ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I saw a guy in Iceland yesterday (we just got home - what an amazing place!) who was wearing shorts and flipflops. While the temp was 40°F, the wind was blowing 50mph+ (sustained! with higher gusts). 

I was in ALL the layers. lol

This made me chuckle.    This is an everyday sight here in Minnesota.   ☃️

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

On 12/8/2018 at 9:29 PM, Dandruff said:

Why is she bending like that?  Is there a Christmas present hidden up his nose?

No way man! That’s where Bro Gary hides presents (and his nose demon). Although maybe Josiah has tiny gay nose demon and that’s why we all think that thing that must never be mentioned.

Am I in trouble now?  

[JordynDarby5]

7 hours ago, Timetostoplurking said:

This made me chuckle.    This is an everyday sight here in Minnesota.   ☃️

We always tease my dad that he's gone native because he's from Minnesota and yet always the first one to get cold in our family.  I used to be the second but my medical problems switch that on me. Now there's nothing I love better then really cold weather. Thirty degrees, twenty degrees, and lower it all sounds perfect to me. It feels so good. It makes my inflammation feel better.  I keep my window open and wear shorts and a tank top. If I could I'd just lay outside with the snow beneath me and snow falling on me.