Gwen Shamblin 4: Lick the Fork

[nokidsmom]

15 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

At red lobster for me. We'll not make good cult leaders, not grand (or pretentious) enough. Gwen Shamblin's ego is through the roof, just like her hair.

Isn't that the truth.  Mr. No proposed to me while we were sitting in the car.   Very unpretentious.  Gwen's head (or hair?) would explode at such a mundane setting.  

[Destiny]

That engagement video was cringey in all the wrong ways. I kept having to pause it from second hand embarrassment. 

[ViolaSebastian]

Wow, wow, wow. That did not disappoint one bit. Gwen needs to work on her acting skills, she looks about as surprised as I do when I get the same fruitcake from my aunt for Christmas ten years in a row. 

My favorite bit was when all the men were throwing Joe up in the air. I have never, ever seen a group of people do this outside of movies about sports. The engagement was so "extra" (God, I feel like I finally understand the meaning of that word now) that it leaves one to wonder where they'll have room to go for the wedding. 

Oh, and the two engagements I have under my belt? One was in a kitchen and one was in a living room after drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels. 

[Destiny]

4 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

The engagement was so "extra" (God, I feel like I finally understand the meaning of that word now) that it leaves one to wonder where they'll have room to go for the wedding. 

Watch the wedding. It's AMAZING. 

 

Edit: all the little girls in white reminded me of Meredith. I miss her. I hope she is happy. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Joe’s constant pointing to God is annoying. I bet he does that in bed too ?

[formergothardite]

7 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Joe’s constant pointing to God is annoying. I

It was really weird. Was he told to point a certain number of times?

It was very much like he was poorly acting as a groom in a cheaply made movie. 

[RemnantSurvivor]

6 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Joe’s constant pointing to God is annoying.  

That’s totally a remnant thing. You have to give glory to God for everything. Thus the constant pointing to God when someone claps after your performance. Seriously. Just go watch any choir performance, etc. Always the same motion afterwards. ? 

[formergothardite]

1 hour ago, littlemommy said:

WHY is the music to the engagement video from the Shrek soundtrack?

I was trying to figure out what movie it was from! Of all the movies, why Shrek?  Is it their favorite movie? Did she not know and just thought it sounded pretty and used it without researching? Gwen is just so strange. 

[hoipolloi]

32 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Joe’s constant pointing to God is annoying.

Is THAT what he was doing? Here I thought that he was just demented.

 

 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Just now, hoipolloi said:

Is THAT what he was doing? Here I thought that he was just demented.

 

 

Well, in your defense those aren't mutually exclusive  

[Tatar-tot]

What a beautifully staged ceremony for Senior Citizen Barbie and Jesus Loving Tarzan.  Aah....True Love...???

Tarzan truly is the king of the Remnant, and Gwen, you won the lottery.  

It is too bad Tarzan could not get his pants hemmed or his hair cut for this theatrical event. 

[Briefly]

3 hours ago, nokidsmom said:

Isn't that the truth.  Mr. No proposed to me while we were sitting in the car.   Very unpretentious.  Gwen's head (or hair?) would explode at such a mundane setting.  

I probably shouldn't admit this, but Mr. Briefly proposed to me while we were taking a shower...

Those videos are something else!  I fast forwarded through parts of it, but they were so beyond scripted and fake!  The engagement video especially.  All the camera angles are a huge giveaway that it was as scripted.  The wedding video, were her vows shown or just his?

[MayMay1123]

3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Joe’s constant pointing to God is annoying. I bet he does that in bed too ?

Joe notices a camera on him, Joe's arm shoots up in the air. 

[Blahblah]

What is this....thing?

[hoipolloi]

Nice photobombing!

Question: why didn't everyone stand up when the "bride" came in? Thought this was customary -- maybe not when you're dealing with a cult.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

21 minutes ago, hoipolloi said:

Nice photobombing!

Question: why didn't everyone stand up when the "bride" came in? Thought this was customary -- maybe not when you're dealing with a cult.

what is that creepy puppet?  Between them and at top of pic.  Looks like a sinister Pinocchio.

[JermajestyDuggar]

10 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

what is that creepy puppet?  Between them and at top of pic.  Looks like a sinister Pinocchio.

Omg now I see it! 

[quiversR4hunting]

The engagement video, 4 minute mark, the little girl dancing with Mrs. Haversham, the little girl's arms were normal and bigger than Gwen's (Haversham ) arms. Wow. 

[Tatar-tot]

1 hour ago, hoipolloi said:

Nice photobombing!

Question: why didn't everyone stand up when the "bride" came in? Thought this was customary -- maybe not when you're dealing with a cult.

My favorite is where Gwen’s spray tan rubbed off and left her with a white strip between the dress and the tan.  

[tankgirl]

Gwen shouldn't have baked that cake before she got married, because damn that face looks covered in flour. I know her hair is bad, but why go get spray tanned, then go use the lightest coloured, cheap foundation she could dig up? I think I saw some kids out for candy the other night with better matched and blended make up. I just can't even get the look this lady is aiming for.

[Tatar-tot]

6 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Is she wearing a fall?  That's a hairpiece right, the puffy part?

I can't look at her without thinking of the Grandmother in Flowers In the Attic...when Christopher spies on her in her bedroom saying her evil prayers and sees her wig on her dresser. 

Just out of curiosity, how old is she?

Gwen definitely has a weave.  It is not the world’s greatest either.

My hat is off to her:  63 years old - developed a tax avoidance scheme and socked away millions - now she is shacking up with Tarzan.  I have got to give her credit.  Not many people can pull this off.  

[formergothardite]

1 hour ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

what is that creepy puppet?  Between them and at top of pic.  Looks like a sinister Pinocchio.

Once seen it can't be unseen! 

I looked through the RF wedding page and the weddings are pretty much all the same. Gwen's had some added pizzazz because she is the queen bee, but they have the bride and groom reading to each other, a hoard of children dressed in white, Gwen sometimes dressed in white, people dancing tightly around the couple as they slow dance, people hoisting the bride and groom up in the air, and the bride and groom driving off sitting on the back of a convertible waving to a crowd of people waving sparklers. They don't really do individuality, do they? In some wedding videos Gwen is shown more than the bride! Gwen really is the bride at every wedding!

Spoiler

 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

18 minutes ago, Tatar-tot said:

Gwen definitely has a weave.  It is not the world’s greatest either.

My hat is off to her:  63 years old - developed a tax avoidance scheme and socked away millions - now she is shacking up with Tarzan.  I have got to give her credit.  Not many people can pull this off.  

Agreed.  In the grande scheme of things she is certainly more successful, and certainly thinner, than I will ever be.  

I think i have better hair, but that's worth exactly nothing.

[RFSurvivor_2]

 

17 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

In some wedding videos Gwen is shown more than the bride! Gwen really is the bride at every wedding!

  Hide contents

 

*waves* this is the case with @RFsurvivor and my wedding. 

[formergothardite]

Just now, RFSurvivor_2 said:

waves* this is the case with @RFsurvivor and my wedding. 

It was weird watching these videos and the entire thing is Gwen with brief appearances by the bride and groom! It is someone else's turn to shine Gwen! 

I don't get their whole wedding website complete with a page devoted to wedding dresses. Can regular people use the church and get a wedding dress through them or is this just to show off the weddings they host?