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2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I don’t do well with constant noise. Especially whining and fussing all day long. That’s one of the many reasons why I stopped at 2 kids. Braggie would have done better with only 2-3 kids as well. But she’s a mommy martyr as we’ve said before. 

I'm the same way. That's why I only have one. Some people are fine with it, but Abbie doesn't sound like one of those people. She should not have so many. Nothing wrong with knowing your own limitations. We all have different strengths and weaknesses.

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Doing crafts with my kids made me want to "drive off into the sunset" sometimes. Between the kids, the dogs, the cats, the mess...yeah...it got tough at times. 

Back then, I was part of an old AOL SAHM board...and we had a place to whine, bitch, complain, cheer, congratulate, and just be with other women who were in the same boat. The great part of that board is that almost 30 years later, we're still a group, we have a private FB page. I consider those ladies my best friends...we, now, tend to overshare...but we've been a part of each other's lives for such a long time that it's less friendship and more sisterhood.

Abbie would have been told to jump back...see, we weren't very "polite" at times, but we were real. Abbie wouldn't know real if it bit her in the ass. 

Home Décor: I'm not buying anything for where I live now...hopefully its temporary. Oh hell, who am I kidding...I'm not buying anything because I can't really find anything I like and am willing to blow the cash on. 

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I’ve admitted before that I love a lot of Braggie’s style. But you wouldn’t know it by the looks of my house. I go for practical and inexpensive. Which means my house may not look like a magazine, but it works for us. I tend to keep things for a very long time. That’s part why I will never be like Braggie. I could never change my decor every six months. She gets new stuff constantly. That’s a lot of time and effort I just don’t have. So our practical home is ugly and outdated. But it works well for our needs. I will always choose practical over pretty. 

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53 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’ve admitted before that I love a lot of Braggie’s style. But you wouldn’t know it by the looks of my house. I go for practical and inexpensive. Which means my house may not look like a magazine, but it works for us. I tend to keep things for a very long time. That’s part why I will never be like Braggie. I could never change my decor every six months. She gets new stuff constantly. That’s a lot of time and effort I just don’t have. So our practical home is ugly and outdated. But it works well for our needs. I will always choose practical over pretty. 

It is probably filled with love and warmth and that makes it way more prettier than Braggie's house.

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16 minutes ago, ophelia said:

It is probably filled with love and warmth and that makes it way more prettier than Braggie's house.

Love and warmth and crumbs. Always crumbs. ?

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5 hours ago, feministxtian said:

Doing crafts with my kids made me want to "drive off into the sunset" sometimes.

Try having a kid or grandchild who's significantly better at crafts than YOU are!

Talk about sunsets -- wine at sunset is more like it.

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3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Love and warmth and crumbs. Always crumbs. ?

same at our house. People have told me that walking into our house is calming. We always have coffee, water, a snack, a place to sit, kick up your feet, snuggle a kitty...

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7 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’ve admitted before that I love a lot of Braggie’s style. But you wouldn’t know it by the looks of my house. I go for practical and inexpensive. Which means my house may not look like a magazine, but it works for us. I tend to keep things for a very long time. That’s part why I will never be like Braggie. I could never change my decor every six months. She gets new stuff constantly. That’s a lot of time and effort I just don’t have. So our practical home is ugly and outdated. But it works well for our needs. I will always choose practical over pretty. 

Do you mean practical, inexpensive, and not a waste of time?

Braggie is a mother of 8 , not 3 or 4, and is not spending her time responsibly. The woman spends at least 40 hours a week feeding her addiction to decorate which only fuels her narcissism. She is so checked out all day that the oldest kids must play “Mom” or fend for themselves.  There are healthier, less self-serving outlets available for her to engage in.

She dresses her house better than her kids because she could care less if it doesn’t involve her. 

She will only do things IF they puff herself up for her fangirl audience.

Braggie should learn from Megan of Living Whole’s story, AKA When A Narcissist Falls, and eat a serving of humble pie.

Braggie has to understand that if she wants to succeed as a JoAnna Gaines type of Christian blogger, author, with a huge following she’s first going to have to succeed at trying to make friends (& keep them) because the most popular bloggers are LIKEABLE and someone every woman wants to be BFFs with. Narcissists like Lori don’t succeed at this job and that’s why they end up talked about here.

Also, whatever happened to Abbie’s live TV appearance (video) after the Fuss Juice Saga? She probably still hasn’t finished editing it & I don’t think she ever will! Why? Because there’s NO defense for serving your children a dose of Fuss Juice down their crying throat for “not obeying” by sitting still at Bible time or asking for a different color cup!

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Abbie’s twin obsessions with thinness and home decorating remind me of what a college friend told me about her over-indulged upper middle class mother: She once overheard her mother moaning to her father, “Whatever are we going to do about Sally? She’s SO fat and SO ugly.”  Sally, at the time, was an athletic teenager who was about 5’8” and 145 pounds, and who had plenty of dates—she just didn’t match her ritzy mom’s idea of the perfect uppercrust debutante. Sally’s mom also used to get “bored” with the expensive wall-to-wall carpeting in her house, tearing it up and replacing it every six months or so.

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15 minutes ago, Hane said:

Abbie’s twin obsessions with thinness and home decorating remind me of what a college friend told me about her over-indulged upper middle class mother: She once overheard her mother moaning to her father, “Whatever are we going to do about Sally? She’s SO fat and SO ugly.”  Sally, at the time, was an athletic teenager who was about 5’8” and 145 pounds, and who had plenty of dates—she just didn’t match her ritzy mom’s idea of the perfect uppercrust debutante. Sally’s mom also used to get “bored” with the expensive wall-to-wall carpeting in her house, tearing it up and replacing it every six months or so.

How about a lower middle class narcissist? The mother was the same way. 5'4", 145 lbs, stacked & packed (already a 36C) and I was fat and ugly among other things...

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On 11/19/2018 at 5:59 AM, ophelia said:

what is going on with his brother and where did you see this?

I'm not nastyhobbitses but I can help with this! Basically, Richard has a transgender brother. When asked in a live how many brothers he had, Richard first said "two and a half", then just two. He referred to his transgender brother as a half then removed him completely. :( Then, someone on the blogsnark subreddit found the brother's (public) Instagram, where he'd written about Richard and FF coming to visit and how Richard had been rude and was transphobic to his face. Richard's brother said he just had to put up with it because "he's blood". (Apparently FF was kind and respectful so, there's that at least)

I got all this from GOMI and the blogsnark subreddit!

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So, side handed insult to the other kids (who aren't Dream Babies), and then qualify that she's not perfect and list her daughter's flaws in the post. What was the point of mentioning the things she's not good at?

I know Abbie has mentioned before how it's really hard being her because she's a "Jill of all Trades" and can do everything well, but not do any one thing great. And she includes writing as one of her things she does well. But, I seriously, I hope she is not a talented writer and she is just really botching up saying what she really thinks and what is going on. 

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7 minutes ago, Off the Rails said:

So, side handed insult to the other kids (who aren't Dream Babies), and then qualify that she's not perfect and list her daughter's flaws in the post. What was the point of mentioning the things she's not good at?

 

Because she has to remind everyone that *she* is the Queen Bee.  

She says some nice things about her daughter, but none of the comments are particularly motherly.  Other than the list of her flaws, it sounds like something a family friend would write about a child they've known since they were a baby.  She doesn't say she loves her even once.  

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Wow... Well Abbie can make an eight year old's birthday post entirely about herself and her own experience. Ugh.

Can I share something non-snarky with the thread? I am not a mother, but I am deeply afraid of becoming a mother because I am afraid to be like Abbie. I want to have a child but just don't know if I have the traits I feel are needed for parenthood. Has anyone else felt like this? Did you have kids? Not have kids? What have your experiences been like?

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30 minutes ago, sleepy_doggos said:

Wow... Well Abbie can make an eight year old's birthday post entirely about herself and her own experience. Ugh.

Can I share something non-snarky with the thread? I am not a mother, but I am deeply afraid of becoming a mother because I am afraid to be like Abbie. I want to have a child but just don't know if I have the traits I feel are needed for parenthood. Has anyone else felt like this? Did you have kids? Not have kids? What have your experiences been like?

I am about as maternal as a mama alligator. Have 3 kids. Fortunately they turned out to be really fantastic human beings. I love them to pieces but I wasn't and still am not "maternal". Had 6yo grandson here for a weekend. Couldn't wait for him to shut up and go to sleep. Again, I love him mama-bear style but...I like my solitude and quiet. 

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18 minutes ago, sleepy_doggos said:

Wow... Well Abbie can make an eight year old's birthday post entirely about herself and her own experience. Ugh.

Can I share something non-snarky with the thread? I am not a mother, but I am deeply afraid of becoming a mother because I am afraid to be like Abbie. I want to have a child but just don't know if I have the traits I feel are needed for parenthood. Has anyone else felt like this? Did you have kids? Not have kids? What have your experiences been like?

I have a lot of thoughts like Braggie. But I tend to keep it to myself or in therapy. My kids do make me want to run away screaming sometimes. But I try not to let them see it. I don’t want my kids to feel like shit because mommy has a hard time with pretty normal behaviors like constant whining and fighting with each other. I do better one on one with kids. I would be a horrible mom of many. Two is my limit. I can see a lot of my issues in Braggie (like the constant noise and mess) and have a strong feeling she would be a better mom to only 1-3 kids only. You can have “issues” and still be a good mom. Braggie’s problem is that she knows she has issues, but she doesn’t do a damn thing about it. Well I guess she prays. Sorry but that’s not enough. She needs to see a therapist and stop having kids. But she won’t. 

Btw, I would have cried for days if my second pregnancy had turned out to be twins. I remember the first ultrasound. All I really focused on was that I only had one in there! I think I shocked the doctor because he was showing me this blob as if I should be interested. But all I cared about is if there was only one blob, not two. 

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I have a lot of thoughts like Braggie. But I tend to keep it to myself or in therapy. My kids do make me want to run away screaming sometimes. But I try not to let them see it. I don’t want my kids to feel like shit because mommy has a hard time with pretty normal behaviors like constant whining and fighting with each other. I do better one on one with kids. I would be a horrible mom of many. Two is my limit. I can see a lot of my issues in Braggie (like the constant noise and mess) and have a strong feeling she would be a better mom to only 1-3 kids only. You can have “issues” and still be a good mom. Braggie’s problem is that she knows she has issues, but she doesn’t do a damn thing about it. Well I guess she prays. Sorry but that’s not enough. She needs to see a therapist and stop having kids. But she won’t. 
Btw, I would have cried for days if my second pregnancy had turned out to be twins. I remember the first ultrasound. All I really focused on was that I only had one in there! I think I shocked the doctor because he was showing me this blob as if I should be interested. But all I cared about is if there was only one blob, not two. 


@jermajestyduggar It's good to hear that the honest part of you having to manage some things for yourself as you're parenting. Thanks for responding. I enjoy your thoughts and authenticity in general around here as well.
I think if I do decide to have children one day I would limit to 1-2, just based on my energy levels and what I can handle emotionally.
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I am about as maternal as a mama alligator. Have 3 kids. Fortunately they turned out to be really fantastic human beings. I love them to pieces but I wasn't and still am not "maternal". Had 6yo grandson here for a weekend. Couldn't wait for him to shut up and go to sleep. Again, I love him mama-bear style but...I like my solitude and quiet. 
@feministxtian you may not consider yourself maternal, but from all your posts I've gathered you love people fiercely, admire them as individuals, and would do anything for them. Those are traits I consider maternal and I admire so much! They're also not things I always have. I have a strong self focus, try not to beat myself up for it but there it is. Some would very much describe me as selfish. Not pretty to know about yourself and not a trait I consider good as a parent. I love hearing your experiences because your voice comes across so clear as MAMA BEAR.
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@sleepy_doggos I worried about how I would be as a mother since my bio mom was not maternal at all. But as soon as I got pregnant I could not stop smiling when I thought of my baby. She’ll be 13 years old tomorrow, and we’ve had a lot of issues and hard times but loving her has never been hard. She knows she is our one and only and she prefers that. 

I think if you’re thinking about it and worrying about it, you’ll be fine. I don’t think it occurs to people like Abbie that they aren’t very good mothers. 

P.S. I’m pretty sure we all have moments where we want to hide from our child/children. 

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I’m glad she has changed her tune and bought a birthday gift for her daughter as she has bragged about not giving them gifts and not having toys to call “mine”.

I am disgusted that she complained about her daughter’s “lack of focus and organization”.

She only raves about the two oldest sons whom she makes do EVERYTHING for her.

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57 minutes ago, sleepy_doggos said:
1 hour ago, feministxtian said:
I am about as maternal as a mama alligator. Have 3 kids. Fortunately they turned out to be really fantastic human beings. I love them to pieces but I wasn't and still am not "maternal". Had 6yo grandson here for a weekend. Couldn't wait for him to shut up and go to sleep. Again, I love him mama-bear style but...I like my solitude and quiet. 

@feministxtian you may not consider yourself maternal, but from all your posts I've gathered you love people fiercely, admire them as individuals, and would do anything for them. Those are traits I consider maternal and I admire so much! They're also not things I always have. I have a strong self focus, try not to beat myself up for it but there it is. Some would very much describe me as selfish. Not pretty to know about yourself and not a trait I consider good as a parent. I love hearing your experiences because your voice comes across so clear as MAMA BEAR.

::::::::::::blushing::::::::::

I'm the type who will get up at 3am to answer the phone call from a friend coming apart at the seams. HOWEVER, when it comes to children...nah...as I've said, I like them from birth to 3 months when they stay where you leave them and then after they become adults and move out. In the time from 3 months to move-out, I'd much prefer to put either them or me on a deserted island somewhere. I do what I have to do and attempt to do it well, but I'm not one of those warm and fuzzy types. I hated every single Christmas program, children's choir, school play I was forced to sit through, back to school nights turned into me apologizing for inflicting my spawn on some poor, unsuspecting teacher. My idea of "helping" with homework was "sit your ass down and do it and shut up about it". All those "read to your child for 30 minutes every night" notes that came home devolved into "here's a book, read it yourself". Look, I potty trained my youngest by leaving him in a nasty diaper all day so he'd decide that using the toilet was better than sitting in shit all day. I am NOT "maternal". 

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