Jana 7: Home Sweet TTH

[SamiKatz]

7 hours ago, DundeeUnFundie said:

While I agree that Derek does not appear to be the best husband, I'm actually not going to place the whole blame on him for Jill's isolation. Jill's made comments (I think at Joy's wedding?) about how your husband is everything and friendships are not as important as your husband. She chose to leave Counting On to show solidarity with her husband despite it being (from what we can tell) the main source of income for the family. I would say that indicates that she still believes her husband should come first to her over financial security and support of her friends and family, and people don't tend to like being treated poorly because someone else is on a pedestal.

As for Jana, I don't know. I think now she has instagram, we might see a lot more of her life but that might end up challenging a lot of previously accepted ideas about her. We'll see what happens.

Bolding mine.  As Derrick is her headship, Jill would have no choice in the matter.  If he decided to leave Counting On, she has to follow his wishes, regardless of what she wants, or any fears she might have for the future.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

36 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

You completely misunderstood what I wrote. I made it pretty clear that I was comparing adult children living with their parents and why some will not leave, whether they are happy and living healthy lives or whether they are suffering as in the case case of the Turpins. Many times, it’s due to significant emotional attachments to others within the family and perceived obligations. The Turpin adult children are a completely unrelated, extreme example of adult children suffering immense abuse despite (all except one) not leaving the situation. In fact, I emphasized that I was not at all implying that the Duggars have been abused and actually stated that it’s possible the Duggars adult children are content and are not emotionally enmeshed within the family.

Feel free to include your own example of adult children living with their parents that are living happy, healthy lives along with a polar opposite, unrelated example of adult children living with their parents that are not living happy, healthy lives. We can discuss the adult children in the Maxwell family or plenty of other fundie families, however we have no idea if they are not content as they very well could be living happy and healthy lives, as many are.

Jana definitely appears to be living a happy, healthy, and overall content life and we’ll never know if she’s unhappy unless she decides to explain it. I’d assume she’s frustrated by the public’s constant speculation over why she is not married, given her culture’s norm of early marriage, and I feel for her. It must stink to have people question it whether you’re completely content without being married or not.

FWIW I agree with @Tatar-tot that it was a very insensitive analogy.  Mainly for the reasons you yourself pointed out.  

[QuiverFullofBooks]

14 minutes ago, luv2laugh said:

Compared to Derick, I personally always hesitate to criticize Jill because I don’t know if she’s actually happy with him. I could imagine she, being a people pleaser and one who admired a future husband being akin to that of JB, is humiliated by his controversial public outbursts and frequent confrontation. She must have felt embarrassed by the some of Bates unfollowing him and if any family members disagreed with him. We don’t even know if Jill wanted to leave TLC (she cried on Fox News to save the show at one point). Personally, I view her “best hubby ever” posts as her attempting to repair his image and convince other people to love him as much as she believes she does right now. Perhaps she feels Derick will change one day and not be confrontational. 

Jill seems impervious to embarrassment herself, and I think she’s probably not embarrassed by #besthubbyever. Her parents’ behavior brought criticism as well as praise, and they taught Jill to consider herself superior to their critics. I think she’s applied this lesson to Derick’s behavior. I do think that Jim Bob and Michelle are sufficiently in touch with reality that they are embarrassed and annoyed. 

[luv2laugh]

9 minutes ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Jill seems impervious to embarrassment herself, and I think she’s probably not embarrassed by #besthubbyever. Her parents’ behavior brought criticism as well as praise, and they taught Jill to consider herself superior to their critics. I think she’s applied this lesson to Derick’s behavior. I do think that Jim Bob and Michelle are sufficiently in touch with reality that they are embarrassed and annoyed. 

That is definitely possible. Although, I’d wonder why Jill wouldn’t re-tweet Derick’s outbursts nor post something on Instagram to defend his controversial statements in a somewhat Ken Alexander style. She appears to brush it all under the rug and churn out “best hubby ever” posts to make everything “all better”.

We don’t know if Derick is either controlling or influencing her or whether she’s making these decisions herself. 

I can’t help but feel bad for Jill. I think it’s likely Derick influences her and she can’t win either way.

[OyToTheVey]

On 1/16/2019 at 12:22 PM, FleeJanaFree said:

I think too much emphasis is put on Josh wanting to specifically be a lawyer at, what, 16? I did too at 16! (Spoiler alert: I'm not) Your average 16 year old isn't likely to know what their occupation will be in ten years. Most people I know changed majors a few times. And that's fine and normal.   I have exactly two friends that did what they said they were going to do career-wise in high school. 

Yes it sucks he didn't truly have realistic options, but my sympathy for Josh was dried up when he assaulted five girls (that we know about). 

I wasn't even 16! I took the LSATs, was a paralegal for 3 months and quit. I HATED it so much. 

The rest I totally agree with you.

[lomo6]

 

[singsingsing]

I have a feeling both families think the Lawson/Jana speculating is hilarious.

As others have pointed out, he's probably about to release a new song.

[SamiKatz]

31 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

I have a feeling both families think the Lawson/Jana speculating is hilarious.

As others have pointed out, he's probably about to release a new song.

A song about Jana!

This would be like a modern fundie Romeo and Juliet, except for dueling television networks instead of families.

 

[Toothfairy]

Michelle said she tells her kids to do what God is calling them to do. Lies. 

[KeshetParparNesicha]

Conspiracy time: the Instagram handle @janambates is also taken. Is there any reliable way to tell when the account was created?

[kbohn23]

So Jana is with the seewalds and vuolos at the g3 conference. How come she’s allowed to hang out with the adult children now? 

 

[SassyPants]

15 minutes ago, kbohn23 said:

So Jana is with the seewalds and vuolos at the g3 conference. How come she’s allowed to hang out with the adult children now? 

 

Babysitting needs...so the others can have date nights.

[kbohn23]

17 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Babysitting needs...so the others can have date nights.

Good point! 

[Pecansforeveryone]

I also think they want Jana to hear what the presenters have to say and further her walk as a young Christian lady. I don't think they treat Jana as a child in literally everything, though I do think she is generally infantilized. 

[Coconut Flan]

Possibly there are some interesting, unmarried, ministry-minded males attending so in JB's mind good husband hunting territory.

[Pecansforeveryone]

I also think Jessa would be and is just as happy to play matchmaker for Jana as she is for Jinger. I do think as Jana approaches 30 JB is a little more concerned about her finding the right man to settle down with. 

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, kbohn23 said:

So Jana is with the seewalds and vuolos at the g3 conference. How come she’s allowed to hang out with the adult children now? 

 

She’s been hanging out with them for a while. This trip was from April 2017:

They likely don’t have an issue with it since she’s not traveling unchaperoned - she has two of her sisters, their husbands, and Laura there too.

[luv2laugh]

I've always been surprised that Jana, who was known as the "BFF of Jill", is frequently hanging out with Jessa, Jinger, and Anna but I can't remember her being pictured with Jill other than at family events.

[HereticHick]

5 hours ago, singsingsing said:

I have a feeling both families think the Lawson/Jana speculating is hilarious.

As others have pointed out, he's probably about to release a new song.

I bet a certain  young Bates maiden WOULD NOT BE PLEASED if a Lawson relationship took the spotlight off her very EXTRA engagement season.

[Ever]

6 hours ago, lomo6 said:

 

I would barf. That guy is so shallow and into himself. I mean, Jana could have the sense and personality of a peanut for all I know but I was kind of hoping she would hookup w a MAN and not a self involved boy lol

[AnnaRuk09]

3 hours ago, kbohn23 said:

So Jana is with the seewalds and vuolos at the g3 conference. How come she’s allowed to hang out with the adult children now? 

I don’t believe she ever was prevented from hanging out with them. She probably doesn’t on a lot of occasions because it’d be awkward with her being single and the rest being couples. She’s also been on trips with them to that Waco place they love as someone pointed out. 

 

Im so sick of hearing the words Jana and Lawson and courtship being in the same sentence. The rumors are not true. I’m sick of all their fans speculating about this shit. But I could definitely see where it would benefit him and his family with the marketing and attention, those money whores. The Bates are no different than the Duggars. They’re just good at keeping their pie holes shut. Lawson, while he might do commendable things, still acts like such a douche. He thinks like he’s the hottest stuff ever. He’s not a man, he’s a little boy.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

On ‎1‎/‎17‎/‎2019 at 2:46 AM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I don't even want to speak about, the worst case scenario.

but you did.  without using the words you tossed out a completely baseless accusation in a way that left zero doubt as to what you meant.

you're not clever, that's a shitty thing to put out there.

[artdecades]

4 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

I've always been surprised that Jana, who was known as the "BFF of Jill", is frequently hanging out with Jessa, Jinger, and Anna but I can't remember her being pictured with Jill other than at family events.

I feel like she was only the bff of Jill by default. Like Jessa and Jinger were besties and Jill was the only other older daughter. 

[WiseGirl]

Lawson on the defensive.  Mom made a mistake.

https://www.intouchweekly.com/posts/lawson-bates-family-liking-jana-duggar-comment-accidental/amp/

 

[justmy2cents]

58 minutes ago, WiseGirl said:

Lawson on the defensive.  Mom made a mistake.

https://www.intouchweekly.com/posts/lawson-bates-family-liking-jana-duggar-comment-accidental/amp/

 

OK,  in Kelly's defense I accidentally followed Jill on Instagram.  ?